Ayumi was hard at work, writing her Nanowrimo story and kicking Melissa's ass at the word count. For some reason, she could smell food being cooked from downstairs, which struck her as odd, but ignored it to continue writing. A couple of minutes later, her sister Kiyoko came upstairs and poked her. "Ayumi, come on, Thanksgiving dinner."

Ayumi looked blankly at her. "...today's Turkey day?"

"Duh." Kiyoko replied, rolling her eyes. Ayumi blinked. "No, it's on Thursday."

"Today is Thursday, moron!"

"Holy shit!" Ayumi gasped in horror. "This sucks, I was planning a Poup chapter for Thanksgiving, and now I'll have to rush it!"

"...I don't care." Kiyoko muttered. Ayumi glared at her sister, who got tired of being glared at and started dragging the authoress downstairs by her ankles.

---

Roy was at work, as usual, actually doing his work. Not that he wanted to, but somehow, he had realized that if he did each paper every five minutes, then he'll finish in about two hours and will have about five hours to watch porn on his mini-tv.

The door randomly kicked open. Ed skipped his way inside and jumped in front of Roy's desk with his signature psycho smile. "Happy Thanksgiving, Roy!"

"Go to hell." Roy replied with a tired smile. Ed took this as a compliment and continued with what he was saying. "Hey, Woy-sama ( Roy winced), Al and I are gonna be having dinner at our house, and we were wondering if you could come and join us!"

"Wtf, what house? You burned your house down five years ago." Roy blinked at the younger alchemist. Ed stared blankly at him, his head tilted and his braid in his mouth again. A couple of minutes passed. "...okay, nevermind." He sighed.

"Soooo, are you gonna come?" Ed asked with an adorable pout.

"Hell no, I go and somehow Ayumi'll kill me for the reader's amusement." He answered and went back to signing his name. Ed frowned, tugging on Roy's sleeve and making him look up in annoyance.

"Um...w-well...ya see, Al and I lost everything so long ago...all we really have is each other, and to us, you're our Dad now..." His eyes went all sparkly with unshed tears, and he smiled gently, making all the fangirls squeal as they imagined this scene in their heads like I'm doing right now. "You're really the only thing we have to be thankful for..." He sniffled, the tears now starting to skim over his face. "Please come, Dad...please...?"

"...fine." Roy sighed, trying hard not to get all emotional, even though he was anyway. Ed beamed and wiped his face off. "Great!"

Roy gawked at him and sighed. ...evil bastard.

- (If it's not obvious by now, I love Parental!RoyxEd...)

"Al! We're home!" Ed called once they got to the Elric house. Roy cursed silently at the author, who had luckily left open a bunch of plotholes on how they got to Risembool so quickly, and why the Elrics have their house when they had clearly burnt it down in episode three.

"Brother!" Al rushed out of the kitchen, his hair typed up into a ponytail as usual, and a light pink apron over his normal clothes. "Welcome back!" He smiled at Roy. "Daddy! Nice you can make it!"

Roy twitched.

Ed hung up his jacket on the coat stand and ruffled Al's hair. "Good job, Al. Is everyone else here yet?"

Al nodded with a neko smile. "Yep! Everyone's already at the table, we're just waiting for you."

"...everyone?" Roy glared at the two Elrics. "What the hell, I thought you said it was only going to be the three of us!"

Ed smiled innocently. "I never said that, Daddy." He ran away, cackling while Roy chased after him, threatening to burn him to a crisp. "Lmao." Al chuckled.

-

A couple of minutes later, after Roy had calmed down...

"This way, Daddy!" Ed proclaimed with a cheerful smile, leading the Colonel down the hall and to the dining room. Roy grumbled angrily under his breath, still upset that he was tricked.

"Here we are!" Ed exclaimed. He pointed to the room with the huge table. Roy stared wide eyed at it. Already seated on it was Envy, Hohopapa and Trisha (eh?), along with Izumi, Sig, Wrath, Winry, Pinako, Riza, Ayumi, Kiyoko, Rei and Tsubasa and Mamoru, who are Ayumi's parents that are making a special appearance.

"What the??" Roy blinked.

"What the hell?! You never said Roy was coming!" Ayumi yelled, aiming a glare in Mustang's direction.

"...nice to see you to." Roy deadpanned.

"Now we can feast!" Ed sat Roy down and sat at the head of the table. Al came out, holding a silver platter with a huge glob of poup on it shaped as a turkey. "I call this...Purkey!" He declared, setting the purkey in the center of the table. Everyone except Ed stared at the purkey with twitching eyes.

"...did I forget to mention that I'm allergic to the combination of pudding and soup?" Ayumi said quickly. Al blinked. "Oh...okay, well, I got these...um...potato chips...wanna eat that?"

"Sure!"

"And since we have minors here, I brought apple cider to drink." Tsubasa made two bottles of apple cider appear on the table. Roy stared at her.

"Awesome!" Al sat next to his brother and smiled. "Okay! Before we eat, let's everyone say one thing we're thankful for...or else." The room shuddered at Al's threat and agreed.

"I'll start!" Ed put the tip of his thumb into his mouth like L does in Death Note and thought about it. "I'm thankful that... Roy came with us." He beamed at the Colonel, who smiled back, even though he felt like murdering the blonde. "Actually, I'm joking. I'm actually thankful for Al, because he pwns all of you! ...except maybe Ayumi, because if I don't say that, she'll put me in the box again..."

"Damn straight!"

"Me next!" Al grinned. "I'm thankful for Brother, because he's the best brother in the whole wide world!"

"Aww, thanks Al!" Ed and Al hugged all cute and brotherly again. Envy gagged in disgust.

Because I'm wasting time on my nano, I'm gonna speed things up and just make them go around the table.

"Uhhh...oh! I'm thankful that I don't have to do my paperwork anymore. Yes!" Roy pumped his fist in the air. Riza glared at him.

"I'm thankful of nothing. You all suck...except for Ayumi and her damn box." Envy glared across the table at Ayumi, who just winked and blew a kiss at him, making all the readers go "EW!" at my fangirlness.

"I'm thankful that Trisha's here." Hohopapa said and kissed Trisha's cheek. She giggled. "I am too." She said in a slightly evil tone.

"I'm thankful that for once, I'm not coughing up blood." Izumi said dully, pouring out the apple cider for everyone.

"I'm thankful for my wife." Sig said, and the two hugged with little flowers dancing in the background. Everyone else blinked.

"I'm thankful for having a family!" Wrath jumped up and joined the Curtis hugfeast. Everyone blinked again.

"I'm thankful that for once, Ed hasn't broken his automail again." Winry nodded. Ed looked thoughtful for a second. "...I didn't? Dammit!" He ran off, and soon a loud banging sound followed with a crunch came from the other room. Winry's eyes widened, as Ed came back into the room happily, with his arm smashed up. "There, all better."

"YOU IDIOT!"

"I'm thankful for tobacco." Pinako sighed, taking up another long drawl from her pipe thingy.

"I'm thankful that Roy is a sexy beast." Riza said calmly and winked at the Colonel, who was now having a massive nosebleeding fit.

"And I'm thankful that Ed, who's a sexier beast, is my smex slave for the rest of his life." Ayumi said with a sick, evil smile. "And I'm also thankful for fanfiction."

"Wait a second...I'M WHAT?!" Ed yelled.

"...I'm thankful that Hughes is dead." Kiyoko said plainly.

"Not in this fanfiction!" Ayumi replied.

"Dammit!"

"Yay! Then I'm thankful that he's alive and still mine!" Rei cheered.

"...Rei, Hughes is already married." Roy informed her. Rei grinned evilly. "Not for long..."

"?!"

"I'm just thankful of that fact that my daughter hasn't been sent to an asylum this year." Tsubasa said with a sigh. Ayumi blinked. "Actually..."

"...I'm just hungry, so can we eat the uh...purkey already?" Mamoru got up and carved the purkey. And when I meant carved, I meant poked it a couple of times with a fork in disgust. So instead, everyone just drank a lot of apple cider. Roy seemed to be the only one who realized that the cider tasted funny. "Um...Tsubasa, are you sure this is non-alcoholic."

"Of course it is! See?" She pointed to the label which clearly read 'Made of 35 alcohol'. Roy stared at it, just as Ayumi started randomly giggling and falling off her chair, on her eight glass of cider. "...Um..." He pointed to it. Tsubasa blinked. "Oops! My bad."

"Oh, and by the way everyone, we have a special ingredient in the purkey." Al randomly announced. "Dynamite!"

"WHAT?!"

KA-POW!

Poup splattered everywhere and on everyone. The only thing left on the purkey was a blown out stick of dynamite and a couple of brown-ish yellow globs. Ayumi and Envy broke out laughing and rolled around on the floor, clearly drunk. Ed and Al giggled madly and tackled Wrath and Winry from the other side of the table and randomly began mud wrestling, except wrestling in a glob of Poup instead of mud. Kiyoko started ranting about her plan to murder Hughes, Rei at the same time plotting her plan to get rid of Gracia. Everyone else can just do what you want, leave me alone, I'm tired dammit!

Roy sighed. "This is the worse Turkey Day ever..."

---

Yeah...I'm writing this while having my first hangover, sue me. -.-; Yes, my mom somehow didn't know that there was alcohol in the apple cider and I got drunk...I'll write about it later because it was funny, but I feel so shitty now...T.T Oh yeah, the poup plot will continue next chapter, I just felt like writing this. Happy Turkey Day!