Disclaimer: If I owned Dragonball Z, this wouldn't be fan fiction would it? It would have actually happened.

Brenman: Here is another chapter of the Kakarott zone.

You're standing on your front lawn looking proudly at your new house. The last coat of paint had just been put on and you're ready to go inside and watch your favorite television show. You've finally learned your lesson. No more 500 speaker surround sound systems for you. The last ones accidentally knocked you old house down when you sat down on the T.V. remote and caused the volume to shoot up all the way to eleven. Luckily the company that makes your sound system had paid to have your house rebuilt. Could you really be faulted for accidentally mixing a couple details up and telling them you lived in a giant mansion with marble floors and bathrooms coming out the wazoo?

You sit down and smile at your brand new T.V. with the middle of the line 300 speaker system. You turn the volume up and settle back into your new leather recliner for some good old fashioned boob toobin'. You watch the last couple minutes of the news waiting impatiently for the show to change. Apparently, the Great Saiyaman received the key to Satan city. Pffft, Mr. Satan could kick his butt with both legs tied behind his back and a burlap sack over his head. The screen fades to black and the image of two people appears a couple seconds later.

Vegeta, your ever lovable host, was staring daggers at a stage hand that had a look on his face that clearly stated he had just soiled himself. Vegeta sucked in a menacing sounding breathe. "Silence, I told you already. I won't do the show without my donut."

The stage hand nervously looked at the camera and built up the courage to speak, "Ummm... sir. You're on..."

"I said silence. There is no way you are getting me to put on this show without my donut. Now get me a donut or I'll personally throw you off the top floor of this building." Vegeta shoved the stage hand off screen and then added, "Make it four dozen donuts. I'm hungry." Vegeta turned towards the camera and stopped in shock. "Are we on?"

A voice off stages yelled out, "Yes Vegeta. We're on."

Vegeta frowned. "Fine, but without a donut, I hope you're not expecting to put any effort in." Vegeta glared at the camera, "Welcome to the Kakarott Zone. Oooooh, scary sounding isn't it? This story is about green people and idiots, which we seem to have an abundance of. Have fun."

Vegeta stalked off the screen and a portly balding man with a mustache ran on in his place. "Sorry about that. He's a bit ticked off. We do have someone we're screening. He'll perform the real opening for you now." The man finished with a huff and quickly ran back to where he came from.

You see a body walk onto the screen. 'Today's announcer must be really tall' you think to yourself, he doesn't even fit on the screen. You can't see his face as his whole head seems to have been cut off. The camera man quickly pans up from the mans immaculate suit to his green pointy eared head. With a set scowl he glares at the camera in a menacing way. "Hello, I'm Piccolo. I don't want, nor do I need a job, but when Goku's wife tells you to do something. You do it. This is the sad existence of anyone unfortunate enough to be stuck in, the Kakarott zone. Today's story is about why Goku shouldn't be left unsupervised. Enjoy."

-- License Revoked? --

Dende stood on top of the lookout and smiled at Piccolo, Gohan, and Goku happily. The green skinned healer bent down and picked up his suitcase and turned to Mr. Popo. "Let's get going." he waved goodbye to the three warriors as He boarded the Capsule corp. spaceship that would take him and his servant to new planet Namek for a two week vacation. As the doors closed Dende couldn't help but get a bad feeling that something was going to happen while he was gone.

After the ship was out of sight the three warriors on the lookout turned to each other. Gohan was practically jumping for joy. "This is awesome. Two whole weeks without Dende torturing me." Piccolo looked happy for his young friend.

The seven foot Namekian turned to the older of the two Saiyans and scowled, "Now Son, are you sure you can handle being the guardian for two weeks?"

Goku laughed, "No problem Piccolo, and if I need help, I can always just ask you. Right?"

Piccolo nodded grimly, "Yes you can." with the conversation over Piccolo turned around and flew off the lookout in search of a nice waterfall to go live under.

When his mentor was gone Gohan turned to his father, "See you in a while dad, I have to get going before mom kills me for missing school." and with that Goku found himself alone on top of a giant floating palace, the fate of the earth in his hands. The previous Kami would never have been that irresponsible.

Goku decided that the first thing he would do would be to explore the place. He had been here many times, yet he still didn't really know his way around. He had found that his experiences on the lookout had mainly been confined to the kitchen and wherever he could train himself. Goku's search lead him through many different rooms that didn't seem to have much purpose at all. He did spend a couple of minutes in the pendulum room. He found he could send himself back to when Vegeta and Nappa had been on earth. He spent some time there telling Vegeta and Nappa about the future. The expressions of shock and revulsion on their faces when told that Vegeta would have a son with purple hair made the whole trip worthwhile.

After exploring the lower levels for a little longer Goku decided that it was time to try getting down to work. He went up to the top of the lookout and stretched out his senses to see what was transpiring on the planet below.

"Let's see," Goku mused out loud, "Oh, it looks like the planet is under attack by some evil aliens. Looks like Yamucha just happened to be in the area. Ouch, looks like Yamucha's out of shape. Their beating him up pretty easily. Great, here comes Vegeta and Piccolo. They'll be able to take care of this problem. Yup, no problem. Those two are blowing them all up. Whoops, looks like Vegeta blew Yamucha up also. Must have been an accident. I guess Vegeta didn't see him standing there waving his arms and yelling at them."

After making sure that the rest of the planet was safe, or safe enough, Goku decided from the rumblings of his tummy to go in search of some food. The tall orange clad Saiyan wandered back into the lower levels of the palace. It took Goku five minutes of wandering around to finally figure out that his was completely lost. Now that he thought about it, it wasn't often that he would be in the kitchen. Mr. Popo usually brought food out for them after all. After some quick searching Goku came across a room he hadn't found in his earlier endeavors. The plain wooded door stood alone at the end of a long hallway. A sign hung from the door with the words written clearly for all to see, "Stay Out. Goku." the aforementioned man read, "Must be referring to a different Goku, I'm the guardian for now."

Goku pushed the door open and walked into the room curiously. The room was not very large and it was perfectly round. On the opposite side of the room from the door was a large window. Sitting in front of the window was a wooden steering wheel that looked like it had come right off of an old sailing ship. Said steering wheel was accompanied by a couple of levers, one marked with the words forward and backward, the other with up and down. Goku walked up to the wheel and after examining the room for a couple of seconds before coming to the basic conclusion that this was the cockpit for the lookout.

Goku's stomach chose this as the right time to make a very audible grumble. Naturally Goku was thinking with his stomach again, and after thinking for a couple of minutes, he managed to come up with a brilliant idea, as far as he was concerned. With his mind made up, Goku grabbed the steering wheel spun it around to the right, pushed the first lever into the forward position and went off in search of a drive through restaurant.

It wasn't long before Satan city was quickly approaching on the horizon. A couple more minutes and the floating palace was inside the city limits. Goku scanned the crowded streets below him and maneuvered the ship like an expert into the drive though line up at the first Mc. Capsule corp. restaurant he saw. Another couple minutes elapsed as Goku found himself at the front of the line. It wasn't until he pulled up to the ordering window that he realized that he didn't have any side windows. So he did the first thing that came to mind. He blew a hole in the side of the lookout with a well aimed Kamehameha. Unfortunately for everyone inside the Mc. Capsule corp, the blast blew up everything nearby as well. "Oh well," Goku said to himself with a frown as he examined the smoldering wreckage of the restaurant, "I guess I'll just have to go find another one."

He maneuvered the palace back onto the street in search of more food. He traveled down the street until he saw a Burger Satan restaurant down one of the side streets. He swung the wheel around to the left and the building slowly began turning. Unfortunately for Gohan and Orange Star High school, it was turning too slowly.

Gohan was having a pretty good day at school, he had gotten top marks in a math test, there had been no unscheduled field trips to Capsule corp, and he hadn't been mysteriously locked in any closets with Videl yet. At least Gohan was having a pretty good day until the lookout came crashing through the wall of his classroom. He should have known the two weeks away from Dende was too good to be true.

-- The End --

Piccolo was once again standing on screen with a really embarrassed look on his face. "Just remember, the moral of the story is, never trust Goku with anything." Piccolo shook his head sadly, before being violently pushed out of the way by an irate Vegeta.

Vegeta scowled at the tall green man, "What do you think you're doing on MY show green bean." Vegeta turned around and shouted at someone off screen, "And where the crap is my damn donut."

Someone off screan yelled at Vegeta, "Could you please just rap this up?"

Vegeta glared in the direction of the voice, "Fine, the true moral of the story is, Yamucha should stay the hell out of my way. The end" Vegeta promptly stalked off the stage and the screen faded to black.

You sit on your brand new couch, and smile, everything was back to normal. Except now you house had the new house smell, and some idiot had painted your bedroom puke green, with pink polka dots. Who knows, maybe you could get used to it.

Brenman: How was that? Was it review worthy? Did anyone actually expect me to turn the lookout into a vehicle? Does anyone have the urge to paint their bedroom green and pink?