Hey you guys and gals, sorry I took so long. I wasn't sure how to start this chapter and I'm still not sure where this is going to go. But I do know that it will likely be based closely off my life. None of you know me, so it should be easier… although parts will be painful. Anyway, review please? I'd like to know how I'm doing. Oh, and sorry last chapter was so short, I had absolutely no idea what I wanted to do with it.

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BPOV

He had reddish-gold hair that perfectly complemented his light tan, amazing emerald-colored eyes, an open smile, and very long eyelashes. Then my eyes began to travel down.

DAMN!!

He was broad-shouldered and only lightly muscled. It was apparent, but more attractive than Jasper's other friend. I began to wonder if this was Edward or Emmett when the other guy came up to me.

"BELLS!!" he said, before wrapping me in a huge hug.

I instantly stiffened, seeing Alice and Rosalie's horrified expressions out of the corner of my eye. Just before I began to hyperventilate, I faintly heard Alice and Jasper reprimand him.

"EMMETT!" they both yelled.

He instantly let me go and stepped away. I knew who he was before Alice and Jasper yelled at him, they had warned me. Despite the almost immediate release, I was still shaking and unusually warm. Rosalie walked up then, gently placing her hand on my shoulder. I jumped slightly at the unexpected contact but allowed her hand to remain where it was.

"You ok Bella?" she gently asked me.

I simply nodded, still trying to control my breathing. The others waited patiently, it took me a moment to understand that Jasper had told Edward as well as Emmett about my intense aversion to physical contact. After about five minutes, my breathing steadied and I could think. I sighed and bent to retrieve my dropped books. I stacked them and pulled them into my arms before turning to the others.

"Sorry," I said very softly. They didn't reply, Alice and Rosalie smiled softly before walking back over to me. Emmett began to apologize profusely, Jasper had a very thoughtful expression, but Edward was eyeing me very closely. It seemed he was confused by my reaction.

I just shrugged, then walked up to introduce myself properly. I juggled my books in my arm for a moment, so I could shake his hand.

"Hey, I'm Bella Swan," I said, reaching out to shake his hand.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Edward Cullen," he replied, taking my hand in his.

It was at this moment that I realized my mistake. In an effort to make the weight of the books easier on one arm, I used my right arm to hold them. Which meant that I had to shake with my left hand. Which meant that he would see…..

"What happened?" he asked, noting the jagged, light-colored scars running across my wrist.

I didn't reply, only pulled my hand out of his and almost ran to my first class.

Alice POV

"What was that about?" Edward asked as we watched Bella quickly retreat from such a stressful situation.

"She's never told us, really. I guess there were some problems before she moved here. She's always refused to talk about it, so Rose and I just dropped it after a while. Bella and her parents lived in Indiana until we were 17, so we've lived here about the same amount of time," I replied. Rosalie and I were always very curious and concerned about Bella's scars, which were obviously self-inflicted.

Edward didn't reply, he just returned to his musing expression. I simply sighed, then turned back to Jasper.

"Do you think she'll be OK?" I asked him. He knew how much any kind of contact bothered her.

"Yeah, but it might take a while. I've never seen her react so badly, and we've been hanging out more since the last couple weeks," Jasper replied.

I only sighed again, worried about my best friend. We check the time and decide we should head to our classes. Rosalie and I have our first class together, then we have a class with Bella. We get to Psychology and take a couple seats near the back of the room. We get our books out before starting a conversation.

"Have you ever seen Bella get so tense?" Rosalie asked me almost immediately. Of course, I had known Bella longer.

"No," I answered her honestly.

"Me neither. I'm worried, no one else has ever asked her about the scars before," Rosalie told me. It took me a moment to realize that she was right. Even Jasper had never noticed, and he was one of the most perceptive people I've ever met.

We both sighed, then had to concentrate. The instructor had just walked into the classroom and decided the first day was perfectly fine to begin the material.

Bella POV

I frowned at my schedule, of course. They had to give me government as my first class of the day. Of-freaking-course. I hate government, I was incredibly lucky to pass in high school. I just grumbled again and headed towards my class. It was easy enough to find, second flood of the clock tower. I climbed the steps, they were faster than the elevator and I don't get enough exercise. I walked down the hall to the class. I sighed with relief at the one blessing I was granted that morning, there was an empty aisle seat in the back. I silently thanked God and took the seat before someone else could claim it. I set my books and tiny black purse on the table. I pulled my Government book out and slid my latest read from the top.

Only I could read Pet Sematary more than once in the year.

It took me a minute to notice that the seat next to me had been filled. The new arrival didn't speak to me, so I kept my eyes on my book.

"Stephen King, Bella? Honestly, I thought you would be more of a romance fan."

I froze, it was the voice of velvet, it was Edward Cullen sitting next to me. I take two or three deep breaths before turning to face him.

"Yeah, I was introduced to horror books by an old friend in high school," I told him, sadly referring to when I lived in Indiana.

He noted the change in my mood when I spoke of Jennifer, so he quickly changed the subject.

"How many times have you read this?" he asked me, seeing the torn pages and tattered cover.

"I dunno, I think I've read this copy five or six times. The same friend who introduced me gave me this. I had a paperback before that, it was in much worse shape before I gave it to another friend," I told him, feeling sadder by the minute.

Edward caught the change in my mood, but didn't say anything about it. He either thought it wasn't his business or correctly figured I wouldn't want to talk about it. He sighed quietly, most likely trying to think of something to say. I desperately wanted us to be friends, maybe even more. I quickly quashed the more ambitious thought, there was no way he would want ME like that. There was no possible way, I was too broken. Before either of us could think of something to say, the instructor walked in and I had to pay close attention and take notes. Did I mention that I hate government?

We were fortunate, however. We got out incredibly early, we didn't really do much in there on our first day. I quietly stacked my books back up and swiftly wiped a tear away from my eye. I missed my old friends. I missed everything I had with a couple of them. I missed them so desperately that it hurt. I wasn't quick enough with the tear, Edward noticed the wetness before I did.

"Are you OK?" he asked me as we headed toward our next classes.

"Yeah, I guess I'll be fine. It will just take a little while. I miss my old friends, so very much. But I guess it doesn't matter after all," I replied cryptically, intending to be honest but changing my mind after I started talking.

He just eyed me curiously, trying to make sense of my words. I hoped he would but I also hoped he wouldn't. I didn't want him to be like everyone else, they would always try to cheer me up or sympathize. I didn't want either, I wanted left alone with my thoughts and feelings. He didn't try to do either, just silently encouraged me to continue. We had arrived at the doorway to my next class, however, so I was uncertain if that was a good idea.

"This is my next class," he told me. I just gaped at him. I have another class with the god? And two classes in a row? Finally, proof that God knows I exist.

"Um, well, it's mine too," I told him, looking everywhere except his eyes.

He just smiled warmly, crookedly. My breath caught in my throat. I couldn't think, I could barely process my own words. I shook my head to clear my thoughts, wondering what I should say now.

"We were talking about your old school," he prompted.

I looked uncertainly at him, wondering if he was actually curious or just polite. I just shrugged, not sure what to say. Should I tell him the truth? Or just what everyone else knows about me? Maybe a little bit of both?

"I used to live in Indiana. A really small town, near the Wabash River. We didn't have much, just a family-owned restaurant, an ice cream parlor, a grocery store, and a couple other family operated businesses. We also only had less than 600 people. My high school was only about 700 students, maybe another 20 or so teachers. And I had some people I considered my best friends," I sighed sadly at this point, remembering Jessica's reaction to when I trusted her to something I never thought I'd do.

"Go on?" Edward prompted, he seemed genuinely interested.

"Nikki turned out to be the only real friend I had for a very long time. She fixed things when Jessica and I got into our only fight. I trusted her more than anyone else, with good reason," I stopped again, struggling to contain my tears again.

He didn't say anything, just pulled a tissue out of his pocket and handed it to me. I smiled up at him sadly, the tears still threatening my eyes. I took a deep breath to calm myself and gather my thoughts again.

"I'm sorry, it's just… well, no one really knows about what I'm going to tell you. I'm going to try, I haven't been able to say his name since the accident. I can't stand to see it, either. It hurts, so fucking much," I told him.

He jerked slightly and I looked at him curiously. It looked like he was going to hug me, then thought better of it. He just smiled and shrugged.

"I was a junior, and we were on our way home from school. Things were magnificent when I was with him, I felt almost happy. And the… well, anyway. Things seemed right when I was with him, we were engaged and I was the happiest I'd been since before things with Jessica got tense. But God saw fit to take that away from me. It was a short drive, only fifteen minutes. It all-too-quickly turned into Hell. We were only a quarter mile away from the school, at a four-way stop. It was our turn to go, so C-Ca-Cameron," I sobbed his name out, wiping my eyes as the tears started to fall, "he pulled into the intersection. He wasn't quick enough, a semi hit his side of the car. The brakes had failed, so the semi couldn't stop," I began crying harder as I struggled to finish the story.

"Hey," he said, shocked. The shock quickly wore off as he realized what must have happened. "I get it, I know. You don't have to keep talking."

"Yeah, I do. Alice was at the-the funeral, but she never knew what he was to me. She never knew that he used to be my everything…." I trailed off, sobbing into the tissue again. "Jason saved me. I started talking to him not too long after the accident. He was so sweet, so understanding. But we were forced to have nothing. He lived nearly three hours away, and I was still too broken. Then, I made what I thought would be a huge mistake. I was talking to him on IM one night. My hands were moving faster than my thoughts, I wasn't thinking at all when I told him what I thought would be my last words to him. I thought I fucked up when I told him I loved him. But Jason didn't react the way I thought he would. He didn't reply for a few minutes, then realized I meant it. Of course, when I typed 'shit' after I realized what I wrote, he would know that it was the truth. We talked about it for a few minutes, then I provoked him into telling me the truth. What I needed to know: did he even care about me?" I kept sobbing. I missed Jason, as well. Cameron was the most important person I'd ever known. He meant absolutely everything to me.

Edward made the odd, jerking motion again. I raised my eyebrow at him and he just shrugged. He wasn't going to tell me what that was about.

"I managed to get him to tell me, I just kept saying that there was no way he could feel the same. I mean, who would? I was broken after I lost C- him. Jason said he loved me too. I was elated, then crushed. I knew I didn't love him enough. Losing… Cameron," I forced his name out, "took almost everything I had in me. The only reason I kept going was because I promised him I would try to move on. Some of the last words I said to him. We weren't lucky enough for him to die on contact…." I started crying too hard to keep talking.

Edward jerked again, then made up his mind. He crossed the hall to me, and carefully, gently put his arms around my shoulders. I tensed slightly, which caused him to start to step away.

"Don't, don't go. I need someone right now," I sobbed, fighting the urge to pull him back to my side.

He didn't say anything, just pulled me back into his embrace. I leaned into him and began to cry harder than I had in two years. I shifted my body so I had my face to his chest and he automatically wrapped his arms around me. I heard a quiet gasp from a somehow familiar voice, but I didn't care. I couldn't stop crying once I started.

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A/N so, yeah. a lot of this is going to be based off real-life. Bella's friends from her old school are the same friends as mine, the town she used to live in really does suck that bad, I'm still stuck here, and the stuff about the school it true too. Cameron is a real person, he is currently my fiancé, the accident wasn't real; however many nightmares I've had that have made it true. The thing with Jason really happened, too. Oh, and Bella's intense aversion to physical contact is all mine. I'm very subjective, I quit going to a certain church here in town because they couldn't respect my personal space. So, yeah. Any questions, I suppose I'll answer. And I know who the gasp is from, I just don't know what all that someone heard yet, or where this is going to go. I guess I'll have to start taking suggestions at this point, I'm still clueless as to where I'm going with this. Oh, and the thing about Government is true. I loath the subject.