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Chapter: 2/12
Characters: Krad, Daisuke
Pairing: Krad/Daisuke; Daisuke+Satoshi
Complete One-X Playlist: youtube(dot)com/view(underscore)play(underscore)list?p(equal sign)55DF31E4069401F1
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You're sick of feeling down
You're not the only one
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust me and take my hand
When the lights go out you will understand
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P.a.i.N
Daisuke winced and plodded along the park trail with no real destination in mind. His feet treaded heavily on the paved track, the soles of his shoes scuffing the concrete. His usually vibrant face was pulled into a melancholy grimace, the customary luster in his scarlet eyes dulled.
As the redhead walked, alone and in silence, he couldn't help but feel swindled out of everything he had ever offered to anybody. Satoshi had Dark and Dark had Satoshi. Daisuke had no place in their relationship.
This hurt him; questioned the significance of his being. But what adamantly ingrained itself into his mind, his heart, his living flesh, was the betrayal.
Daisuke loved him. But he, the one person Daisuke had put all his trust and faith into, had taken him away.
It wasn't supposed to be that way. He was supposed to be with Satoshi – not anyone else, and certainly not the playboy Dark.
Daisuke could feel a watery film of oncoming tears pool at the corners of his eyes. Always.
He always envied Dark. Dark was tall, gorgeous, confident, mysterious, and famous – everything Daisuke was not. He was the kind of man people really liked, really wanted to be around. He was adored by Risa, Daisuke's first crush. He eventually won over Riku, Daisuke's second crush. And, if there was even the smallest possibility of things getting worse, then they obviously did. Dark was most probably out there somewhere playing tongue hockey with Satoshi, Daisuke's love.
"He was supposed to be mine."
The dam broke loose and hot trails of liquid rolled down Daisuke's cheek. He felt like screaming, felt like cursing Dark's entire existence, but his throat had closed up. He felt like shutting his eyes, felt like shutting the entire world and all its stupid inhabitants out of his mind, but his eyelids refused to obey him.
"But then Dark…"
The tears streamed from the corners of his eyes, leaving behind dry tracks that stiffened his skin. The distraught redhead fell onto the grass on all fours, letting his head droop and his forehead graze the ground. His shoulders shook as sobs racked his body, and the tears expelled from his eyes fell to the floor, creating fine drops of darkened dirt. He blinked furiously, urging the salty liquid from his system, but it only spread to his upper eyelid, making his vision glossy and unclear.
"Wing Master…"
"…took him away!"
"Niwa!"
Daisuke's head snapped up at the hauntingly familiar voice that had been trying to grab his attention. His hair whipped all about and several teardrops flew from his cheeks. Through vague, liquid eyes, he immediately recognized the blurry form of Krad, whose bright golden hair and white-clad figure instantly revealed his identity.
"K-Krad." Daisuke wiped at his eyes with the back of his hands, blinking to rid himself of his own liquid sadness. "W-what are you doing here?" He straightened up and scooted back in hopes of getting away from the blonde madman.
Krad stared at him through unreadable eyes, face drawn blankly. "Who was supposed to be yours?" he asked, ignoring Daisuke's question completely.
Daisuke's eyes widened. "You heard me?" he whispered, oblivious of the fact that he had been talking aloud in the first place.
Krad's face never even twitched. "Who was supposed to be yours?" he repeated. "The person Dark took."
Daisuke dropped his head in shame as Krad's face gained a calculative facet.
"Satoshi?"
Daisuke didn't look up when Krad guessed right. He closed his eyes to rid the image of this dangerous angel and his mocking sneer from his mind. He was in no mood to be ridiculed for his emotions and attractions. The unfeeling other would never understand what love felt like; what heartbreak felt like.
However, he was startled when the air beside him shifted and a weight rested against his shoulder. Cracking one eye open, Daisuke's vision was assaulted by the silky strands of finely spun bullion that topped Krad's head. The other sat beside him, legs loosely bent and arms behind him, supporting his upper body.
"Do you hurt, Daisuke?"
Daisuke started. Were his ears deceiving him, or did Krad just call him by his first name? It sounded oddly…right.
"Do you hurt?" the angel repeated. No emotions betrayed his true intentions. His voice held nothing; there was not a trace of concern, curiosity, or contempt beneath his words. He simply stated his question.
On that fateful night wherein the redhead hadn't even been present, Krad had lost all of his powers. Despite this fact, Daisuke did not dare to gaze into the tawny cat eyes that usually held disdain and bloodlust for him in their depths. Instead, he studied the ground with rapt attention, drawing his knees to his chest and hugging them meekly. "…Yeah."
There was a moment of silence before Krad finally spoke. "Do you want to hurt?"
Daisuke's head snapped up, and he twisted his head to the side, thunderstruck. "Are you insane?" he asked rhetorically. "Do you think I like feeling like this?" Uncurling himself from his downcast ball, he felt a brief surge of anger rack through his body, but he kept it bottled in fear of invoking Krad's fury. He controlled his voice, although he had to pause and exhale deeply before actually speaking. "Do you think I want to be pushed aside like this? That I wanted to have the person I love taken away from me by my best friend?"
Daisuke's eyes widened lividly as he heard a familiar sound escape Krad's lips. "Are you laughing at me?" he demanded accusatorily, drawing himself up to the tallest height he could manage whilst still sitting down. "Laughing at my depression?"
In a split second, Daisuke found himself flat on his back with a smirking Krad towering above him. With his arms outstretched in a spread-eagle fashion and pinned down by Krad's strong grip, his struggling proved to be futile. He was completely vulnerable.
"K-Krad." Daisuke couldn't keep the fear and panic out of his voice. "What are you doing? Get off me…" He flailed his upper body up and down and tried to pull himself out of the blonde's grasp, but Krad's hold over him was steadfast.
"No, Daisuke."
The way he pronounced Daisuke's name made the carmine-eyed boy in question shiver. Da. Ie. Ske. Why did his name sound so natural coming from a killer's lips?
"You misunderstand me." Blatantly ignoring the smaller boy's attempts to break free from his hold, Krad smirked – and, with his dominating position over the other, arms pinned and hips straddled, he had every right to do so.
"What is there to misunderstand? Get off me! Are you trying to rape me, or what?" Daisuke demanded.
Taking no heed of Daisuke's hysterical speaking, Krad continued on as though the other wasn't thrashing about frantically. "I was not laughing at you – simply your take on the word hurt. Boy, you are a sentimental creature with the soul of a saint; it is sickening. You naturally assume I spoke of the hurt in your heart." The angel's grip tightened painfully, nearly dyeing reddish welts into Daisuke's imprisoned wrists. "And so I will ask you again: Do you want to hurt?"
"No!" Daisuke snapped. "I don't care what kind of pain it is – I just don't want it. I don't want any of it." He cringed, feeling little crescent-shaped marks engrave themselves into his wrists where Krad's nails were digging into the skin.
"That's the thing about life, Daisuke." Krad's face seemed to loom closer to him, eyes cold and foreboding. "You can never be completely painless; it is simply not allowed. It's either pain of the heart or–" Krad released the other's wrists for a split second, sliding both hands a bit farther down to intertwine his fingers with Daisuke's limp ones. "–pain of the body."
Confused and slowly taking in this statement, Daisuke would have never predicted the blonde's next move.
With glittering topaz eyes, Krad swooped down, thus closing the already small distance between their faces. Their lips pressed together in a soundless crash, causing Daisuke to gasp in surprise at the unexpected move. The dominant male wasted no time in entering the redhead's mouth with his tongue, expertly mapping out each and every virgin crevice of it with vigor.
Daisuke could do nothing but let the blonde plunder his defenseless mouth. However, he was torn between one decision and another: try to struggle…or let Krad continue. To his own disgust, Daisuke found himself enjoying Krad's ministrations, wanting them – not wanting them to stop. There must have been something wrong with him.
He was supposed to love Satoshi, not his psycho counterpart, Krad. What kind of love did he have, if the moment another locked him into a kiss, he forgot about the blunette that had caught his affections?
Krad's tongue coaxed Daisuke's invitingly, rubbing it in invitation to join the fun.
But Krad… Krad seemed so gentle. Had Daisuke not been pushed into a kiss with him at that moment, he would have thought the other to be ruthless and cruel in this sort of situation. Contrary to his beliefs, the blonde was being very warm, and so very appealing. Daisuke was sorely tempted to give in.
Fortunately for his wavering control, Krad pulled away just in time, licking his lips enticingly, as though Daisuke's mouth had been a tasty treat. Daisuke blushed at the ridiculous thought.
"Were you hurt at all during that?" Krad questioned.
Daisuke stared up at the other. "…I'm supposed to love Satoshi…" he mumbled, barely loud enough for Krad to actually hear him.
Krad smirked. "What's this, little Niwa? Are you betraying your love?" His seemingly innocent guess had hit home completely. "That can't be good for you – to feel the guilt seep in." Each word began to slur together into one silkily smooth buzz from Krad's lips, a buzz that rocked Daisuke's heart and made his remorse for his wanting soar. "To feel like a traitor to the one you're supposedly in love with. To feel like a monster, harboring such conflicting emotions. Tell me, Daisuke." Krad nuzzled the frozen redhead's neck, his voice low and guttural. "Doesn't that hurt you? Don't I hurt you?"
Daisuke stiffened. "You're trying to hurt me!" he cried out, craning his neck down to push Krad away from him.
Krad pulled away, his golden eyes mocking. "Of course I am. But to hurt is to help, dear Wing Master. I'm being good to you, gentle with you, but that only hurts you, because you think you're betraying your precious Satoshi–" He couldn't keep the disdain out of his voice. "–by liking it. But what if…" Krad released Daisuke's wrists, though he remained straddling the other's slim hips. "What if you could enjoy me? Without all the guilt your puny heart instills within you?"
"I can't," Daisuke replied earnestly, almost unaware of the lack of Krad's fingers around his wrists.
"You are not to say what you can and cannot do without trying," Krad hissed. "I am offering you this chance, Daisuke. You can still be his, but I will make you forget. I will make you better. I will hurt you." It was funny how Krad could put those last two ideas together and have them sound so completely rational. To make Daisuke better, there would be pain involved. It sounded absurd.
But to Daisuke, it was plausible.
"I…I…" However, to Daisuke, it was still a decision to be made, an offer to be accepted. His speech faltered and all he could do was gaze at the serious-looking blonde.
"Do you want to taste it, Daisuke? Taste the sweet flavor of pain, of release? Because that's all it is. It is release. Relish. Right." Without waiting for an answer, Krad pushed his lips against Daisuke's once again, his hands slithering around the redhead's abdomen and underneath the back of his shirt.
In the midst of the tenderness Krad had started off with, Daisuke gave a loud gasp when the blonde forced his mouth open with a sharp nip to his bottom lip. With his blunt canines, it was a surprise that the skin broke and spilled a smidge of blood. However, this was nothing to dwell over. Krad's forceful tongue paid his well being and comfort no heed, pressing itself into uncomfortable places and exploring nearly halfway down his throat. Daisuke felt the need for oxygen bubble in his lungs, but Krad still seemed to be going on strong.
It was then that Daisuke made the realization of the freedom of his hands. Frantic for air, he put his arms into action and grabbed Krad's shoulders, trying to pry his lips off his face.
Krad grunted his displeasure and harshly released Daisuke's lips.
"What was that? I didn't like that."
The angel silenced Daisuke with another kiss. It was neater this time, almost as nice as the first one. Krad's tongue was calm and patient, considerately touching and rubbing places that pushed the redhead's buttons (in a good way, of course). It felt good.
…Which made Daisuke feel bad. How was he supposed to forget about Satoshi when Krad was being so good? So wonderful…like how Daisuke wanted Satoshi to be to him…
Satoshi.
It wasn't working. What good was accepting Krad's offer if it didn't work? This was dirty; for Krad's pleasure, not for Daisuke's benefit. What benefit was there when he was still hurting inside?
Still…hurting…
All of a sudden, a sharp pang ran up his spine, and it took him a moment to realize just what it was. Krad's fingers callously raked across the tender flesh of his back, his nails digging into the flushed skin with malicious intentions. As one hand scraped harshly at the near-raw expanse of the redhead's back, the other lightly trailed itself up his side and to his stomach. The feather light touch made Daisuke's body tremble with a questionable pleasure.
The first hand ground it way down, tearing at the skin and painting a single line of scarlet blood where the middle finger had traveled. The hand firm grasped Daisuke's rear, squeezing it in an indescribable way. Daisuke just didn't know anymore. The grip over his bottom was strong and unyielding, but it gave him reassurance, reassurance that this wasn't wrong. This was so, so right.
The kiss deepened, and Daisuke felt his own tongue spring to life alongside Krad's.
Satoshi would never know, and Daisuke would never stop loving him. It wasn't wrong at all.
Krad's gentle hand traced little designs over the skin of Daisuke's chest and stomach, causing him to let out little kitten-like purrs.
It was right. It felt so good.
With this instilled in his mind, Daisuke let himself go. The placid hand suddenly bit into his chest, each finger leaving a curved indent where it had struck. The fingers and their nails slid down devastatingly slow, drawing out the intense pain meant just for him.
"K…Krad… Ye-yes. I…" the crimson-eyed boy groaned lowly, pulling away from Krad just long enough to utter these words. "I accept…"
Krad merely grunted in response, quickly capturing the redhead's lips once again. His dragging hand stopped and demandingly kneaded the slim flesh of Daisuke's stomach, making said boy's eyes screw shut and his fingers curl at the agonizing sensation.
It was meant just for him. The release. The pain.
And he loved it.
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Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
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Killah: Oh crap. This one was longer than I had expected… o.O Oh well. Just means more KradxDai goodness! xD
Have you ever been hurt? Like…physically, I mean. 'Cause if you have, and you're weird like me, you know what it feels like to be hurt…but not really care. I mean, I let this guy head butt me, I let my friends slap me in the face, and I let people hit me in the back of the head with books and stuff. It hurts, but don't complain. It's just like…whatever, y'know?
Anyway, think of Daisuke as a cutter. He craves the pain to forget all his woe and sadness. But the thing is, he can't actually do it. Hell, I wouldn't be able to cut myself even if I really wanted to. And so, he enlists in Krad's help, accepting his offer to hurt. The pain will free him. /mystical gaze/
/cough/ Eh…anyway… Review? xD Go on. Try to guess the next pairing. /giggle/ Actually listening to the next song might help, y'know. Go and bask in the 3DG glory. Heheh…