A/N: Thank you everyone for the awesome reviews. Loved them all. Thanks you also to everyone who explained the differences between a lemon and a lime. Thanks too to everyone still adding me to their alerts and faves. Take Care and as always Read and Review.
Chapter 20
Hermione apparated to the doorstep of Grimmuald Place with tears still in her eyes, knocked on the door and after Harry opened it, she stumbled inside. Harry caught her and seeing her tears quickly closed the door and led her to the library.
She had never apparated anywhere but inside. Harry knew something was wrong and he didn't even need to see her tears to know. Her not apparating inside was enough of a tip off for him to know something was wrong.
"Mione, what's wrong? What happened?" Harry brought her to the couch, and quickly got her a drink. He watched her take the fire whiskey and start to drink it down.
"I left Hogwarts." She softly said after a while.
He frowned. "Okay, are you sad you had to leave?" He didn't seem to be following.
Hermione shrugged, her voice just as soft. "No, it was time to go. I was done with all my exams." A few tears escaped her eyes to track down her cheek. She didn't even bother to wipe them away.
Harry's frown deepened. "So why are you crying then?"
She looked up at him and he saw that while she was crying, her eyes looked empty and hazy. He quickly squatted down in front of her. "Mione talk to me. You're scaring me. What's wrong? Did something happen?"
He watched her eyes slowly focus, feeling a bit better when he saw her really look at him. The emptiness was still there, but at least she seemed aware. Then he saw a hint of pain flash into her eyes.
"Did something happen?" She asked, her voice raising with sarcasm. "Why no Harry, nothing happened. I just break down in tears all the time for no reason what so ever." Her eyes were starting to heat in anger, which he took as a good sign. It made the emptiness leave her eyes.
"Okay, something happened. What happened exactly?" He could deal with her anger, he had done it before.
A fresh tear trickled down her cheek. "He doesn't want me anymore. He kept his doors locked for over a month." The anger fading from her eyes, the emptiness returning.
Harry gave her a puzzled look. "Are you talking about Snape?"
She nodded looking down at her hands. "Yes. I found out he was reading my thoughts, that he had placed a dream spell on me too, and I was so angry at him. I wanted my revenge so I had him come to the room of requirement and...it was so mean what I did to him." Her words just tumbling out now faster and faster. She missed Harry's raised eyebrows and perplexed look.
"I told him I was sorry that I really didn't intend to hurt him, just to scare him a bit. But he knew, he knew I wouldn't hurt him that's why he let me tie him up."
Harry frowned, not sure he wanted that image in his head. Hermione didn't notice and went on. "I showed him the real torture I had in mind and let him see his Christmas present I had on."
Harry's frown grew, sure now that he didn't want to know or imagine any of what she was saying. Hermione still didn't notice, but stumbled on babbling so fast he wasn't sure he was understanding, or sure he wanted to.
"Then I found out he knew wandless magic and he tied me up and...and..."
Harry stood up, startling her. "Mione for the love of Merlin, please don't go on any more." He exhaled rather loudly. "I need a drink." He walked away muttering curses, all she caught was the words Snape and pictures never leaving his head.
She smirked just a bit. When he came back, she went on, skipping over a few details. "We talked afterwards. He thought that the new transfiguration teacher and I...I don't know what he thought exactly. But he asked if I wanted out of our relationship, I said no and told him to look for himself if he didn't believe me."
"Wait. You gave Snape permission to use his Legilimency on you? Are you crazy?" Harry glared at her. "Don't you remember what I went thru while learning to block it? He pulled out all my bad memories. My parents, Cedric dying, all of it."
She sighed. "I know, but I wanted him to see that I didn't want some other guy, that only I wanted him. He told me to put up walls around what I didn't want him to see. He wasn't trying to dig past them. He was trying to respect them."
Harry snorted, making her frown at him, but she went on. "There were too many things to try to block at once. He saw everything. The war, my parents, my torture with Bellatrix. Everything. I had hoped he didn't get past my walls, but I think he did. I couldn't hold onto them with all the other memories hitting me."
Hermone paused, taking a deep breath and sighing before going on. "I think he saw me tell Minerva that I love him."
Harry, who had been taking a drink of fire whiskey, started to choke. Tears filled his eyes as the beverage burned down his throat and as he gasped for air, it burned his lungs too. Hermione slapped him on the back a few times, and it helped some, but it still took a few moments for him to able to breathe.
His face red from lack of air, and by her statement, he gasped. "You what?"
Hermione pursed her lips in annoyance at his reaction. "I said I think Severus saw me telling Minerva that I am in love with him."
Harry grimaced. "That's what I thought you said. Mione, are you sure? I mean it's Snape. I know I saw you two at Christmas, but I thought it was just a bit of mild caring. I mean...I know he was jealous and angry at seeing Fred kiss you but...it's Snape."
Hermione frowned at him. "Harry, I know what I feel. You should know that I wouldn't say any of this lightly. But, it doesn't matter. Severus doesn't care about me. If he did...he wouldn't have locked me out after finding out that I loved him. As for being jealous, he just doesn't like to share. He said so himself."
Hermione's eyes dropped back to her hands and a fresh tear streaked down her cheek. It hurt to have lived thru it, but it hurt even more to admit it. She would have thought living it would have been worse. It had been, but saying it just seemed to rip the wound open again and it hurt worse now.
Harry doubted it was that simple, but held his tongue. Right now he was more concerned with how Hermione looked. Her eyes were empty again. He fed her another drink, trying to help calm her. Not knowing how to really handle it all, he wished Ginny were here. Ginny would know what to do. If she were angry he might know what to do. But what do you do with empty?
Hermione eventually got up and took her things out of her pocket. She left her bag of books on the library table, but took the rest upstairs to her room. Getting everything settled, she felt that she needed something to distract her, so she went back to the library to sit on the couch and read. Only the books didn't help. Not this time.
Hermione glanced up from the book in her hand. "Harry, I need to get out of here. I need to escape for a while. I think I'll go to the Burrow."
Harry had barely nodded when with a flick of her wand she was gone. Harry stood there for a while. If he got his hands on Snape, he might just kill the rat bastard for doing this to his friend. A part of him really thought there was more to the story, but another part just kept seeing the look in Hermione's eyes.
Hermione landed outside the doors to the Burrow, but suddenly didn't want to go inside. So with another flick of her wand, she was standing outside the twins joke shop. They might help her forget for a little while. She walked inside and within a few seconds she felt two arms surround her waist.
"Hey Mione" One of the smiling redheaded boys said.
"Hey Gorgeous." The other one said, both leaning in to kiss her.
She really tried, but her greeting came out weak. "Hi boys." Her voice hitched but she leaned in to give them both kisses.
Neither moved as they heard her speak and saw her eyes. Fred didn't even try to get her to kiss him on the lips, which he had intended to do when he saw her. Despite her earlier threats. He knew she wouldn't really do it.
Both boys frowned at her and spoke in unison. "Mione, what's wrong?" Both boys pulled her tighter to them, hugging her together. She shuddered against them, leaning her head between both shoulders and promptly burst into tears again.
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Severus was still at Hogwarts. Several hours had passed since the headmistress had left. He had been going back and forth between pacing and sitting on the edge of his sofa. He was trying to figure out what exactly to do and how to go about doing it.
He still didn't know. If he was right and Hermione didn't feel that way about him, could he survive it. Having to walk away from her would kill him.
On the other hand, if he was wrong and she did feel something, want some kind of real relationship with him, he had probably ruined it. How would he fix it? He didn't know enough about this kind of thing to know what to do.
With a growl he stood. He had wasted enough time trying to decide what to do and he was nowhere closer than when he started. He knew Minerva had mentioned Grimmuald Place and he had been there before so he was just going to go there and see what happened.
He apparated to the front door and gave it quick knock. When he didn't hear anything he banged a bit harder on the door.
Harry threw it open, grumbling at the person's impatience. Seeing who it was, his eyes narrowed and his lip curled. "You son of a..." With a growl, his arm flew out and he yanked the man inside, slamming the door behind him.
Severus spun around after being almost thrown into a wall and was about to ask what the hell was going on, when he saw a fist flying at him. He was able to dodge it, but before he could do anything else Harry was flying at him again. Which Snape blocked again, still having no clue what was going on.
Harry swung a third time, catching Snape in the jaw. "How dare you show your face here after what you did." Harry snarled at him.
Snape grunted and took a swing himself in annoyance. His fist catching Harry in the gut, hoping it slowed the younger man down so he could find out what this was all about.
Harry was bent over coughing. Snape pulled out his wand. "Locomotor Mortis." Harry's legs locked together making him fall over, unable to move his lower body.
Snape took a deep breath. "What in the bleeding hell is your problem Potter?"
Harry glared at him, reaching for his wand, but stopped. He knew the man could have done many things to him, but had only stopped him from continuing his own attack. "I'm trying to beat the blooming hell out of you."
Snape smirked. "I noticed. What did I do to you?" He reached up and rubbed his jaw that was aching. Damn kid could pack a punch.
Harry thought about flicking his own spell at Snape, but he knew the potion's master was hard to beat with magic. "Nothing. It's what you did to Mione."
Snape narrowed his eyes. "What did I do to her exactly? She left of her own will. She didn't even tell me that she was leaving."
Harry was still glaring but paused, really looking at the man. Seeing at last that the man looked like hell. "You walked away after seeing all of her thoughts."
Snape sighed, sliding down the wall of the hallway. Sitting down across from where Harry was, both men against opposite wall. Snape was looking at his hands resting on his raised knees. "I didn't walk away, not like you think. I needed time to think, I was upset, angry. I got very drunk and forgot that I had changed my wards and never changed them back."
Harry glared at the man. "You were upset?" Harry laughed, but it didn't hold any humor. "You find something like that out and your answer is to get drunk? You don't deserve her, you prick. What kind of man finds out a woman loves him and goes off to get drunk about it?"
Snape's eyes flew to the man in front of him. "What?" He barked the question.
Harry snarled at him. "You heard me. You're a prick. How could you just leave her after looking into her thoughts and seeing that she loves you?"
Hermione loves me? But I heard her say she made a mistake. I heard... He sighed. Minerva was right I am a daft prat. I had been trying to pull out of her thoughts and must not have heard the whole thing. "Sweet Merlin, I'm an idiot." He lowered his head onto his hands.
Harry frowned at the man. "What? I mean, I know you're an idiot, but why do you suddenly know you're idiot?"
Severus looked back up at Harry, his agony and frustration in his eyes. "I didn't know she loved me." He said quietly.
Crap. Hermione's going to kill me. Harry thought. I wonder if I could go hide out with Charlie in Romania for a few years. I could be a decent dragon wrestler. Who am I kidding? She'd find me anywhere I go.
Harry sighed. "Do you realize she thinks you saw her thoughts about loving you and then locked your doors against her?"
Severus cursed rather fluently. "Where is she? I have to find her, to talk to her."
Harry laughed. "She's going to kill me for telling you that she loves you, how much worse do you think it will be if I tell you where she is too?"
Severus smirked. "If you're a dead man already for telling me, what does it matter how much more she wants to kill you?"
Harry smirked. The man has a decent point. "Still, I'm not sure she wants to see you. Besides what are you going to tell her? That you want to go back to shagging her? Ropes and all?" The last part slipped out on its own, making him wince at the mental picture popping up in his head again.
Severus growled at Harry. "No, you buffoon. I swear sometimes you're dead from the neck up. I'm in love with her. That's why I got drunk. I was upset because I thought she didn't care about me at all. I heard...it doesn't matter what I heard. I'm in love with her and I have to find her."
Harry stared at the man who he would never have guessed would admit to liking anyone let alone loving anyone. He was momentarily speechless. Snape is in love with my best friend. My best friend is in love with Snape. If they actually fix this between them, Mione will be having tiny dungeon bat children one day. The whole thing gave him a full body shudder just thinking about it.
Harry looked hard at Snape and saw the truth in the man's eyes and sighed. "She said she was going to the Burrow."
Severus quickly stood up and with a flick was gone. Harry sighed, pulled out his own wand and muttered the counter curse to free his legs.
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Hermione was laying in Fred's bed. She was rather drunk and finally felt okay. She had stripped off her clothes and tossed them about, and realizing she didn't bring any with her she borrowed some from Fred. She was now wearing one of his t-shirts and her knickers.
She sighed. At least his shirt was clean. However in her current state, she really didn't care one way or another. She did care that the bed was spinning a bit thou.
She glanced at the closed bathroom door that connected Fred and George's rooms. Fred was in the process of taking a shower. He had of course asked her to join him, but she had giggled saying that even if she wanted to, she doubted she would be able to stand in it without falling over. Not that she wanted to of course.
She flipped onto her side, trying to get comfortable in the large and lumpy bed. The boys had quickly closed the shop down earlier after her arrival and taken her upstairs. Once in their living room, they plied her with tons of alcohol and she had spilled the whole story. Ending with them demanding she stay in Fred's room while he slept of the couch.
She lost track of the number of drinks she'd had, which may explain why the bed was spinning on her again. Now it was late and she couldn't get comfortable. She would have thought with so much fire whiskey in her system she would have just passed out.
She was flipping onto her back when she heard a loud popping noise. Sitting up quickly, she saw the outline of a tall man in the almost dark room and she screamed. She grabbed for her wand, her movements sluggish and intended on sending a hex at the shadowed figure. Only with her drunken state she leaned too far when reaching for the wand and fell out of the bed with a loud thump and a grunt as she hit the floor.
"Hermione, are you alright?" A familiar silken voice asked her, quickly crouching down next to her.
"Severus?" She asked, slightly confused as to how he was even here.
At that moment, Fred burst out of the bathroom, a towel hanging at his hips and a wand in his hand. "Mione, what happened?"
George came rushing in the main bedroom door, a bit drunk and half asleep, and flipped the lights on. He took in Hermione lying on her back on the floor with her shirt riding up and showing a hint of her lacy knickers while starting to giggle a bit in her drunken state, Snape crouching down next to her, and Fred wearing a thin towel and dripping wet.
George sighed, leaning against the door to keep from falling over. "What in bloody hell is going on around here?"
Fred saw Severus and growled. "You son of a..." He lunged, loosing his towel and tackled Snape.
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A/N: Another cliffhanger I know. Sorry, didn't do it on purpose, I swear. Last chapter before Epilogue is next. Almost there guys. More coming soon. Take Care.