Chap 4 Totally Spies
They run out the house and get to the garage
Gaara got his mini motorcycle and kankuro got his mini quad bike they drove off into the streets full speed looking for shikamaru's car
Gaara: We need to find him fast
Kankuro: Yeah
Gaara spot sasuke and ino hanging by a corner
Gaara thoughts
That Ino and that bitch Sasuke and he's getting awfully close time to break that up
End of thoughts
Gaara: yo kankuro hole up I have to talk to some one
Kankuro: You mean hold up
Gaara: Yeah that what I said
Kankuro: Nooo you said…..
Gaara: shut the fuck up
Sasuke thinks he see's gaara speeding down the street on a mini motorcycle looking like a skateboarding apple but then he shakes it out of his head until
Gaara reverses and stop in front of sasuke and ino
Ino: Gaara is that you why do you have on all black and pantyhose on your head
Gaara Thoughts
CRAAAP I forgot about the way I was dress I look mad weird and shit and sasuke with her DAAAAM
End of thoughts
Gaara: It's just a family thing
Sasuke mumbles "weirdo"
Gaara: what was that did you just say something
Sasuke looks down on him "what the fuck are you doing do you know you look drunk"
Gaara: did I ask for your opinion bitch face….no then shut the fuck up
Sasuke: at least im not the one on a kiddie bike you clown now go scurry off and crash somewhere and let the grown-ups do what grown-ups do
Sasuke says that while pulling ino into and kiss and smirking
Gaara get off his bike takes off his pantyhose and stares at sasuke
Garra: Yo Shitface
Sasuke: Is the clown still here
Ino: now come on guys don't fight
Gaara: You know beautiful your right I not wasting my time on this ant *give sasuke an evil glare then smiles at ino"
Kankuro: YOOOO GAARA WE DON"T HAVE ANY TIME FOR YOUR BOOTY CALL WE HAVE TO FIND THEM
Gaara: ALRIGHT……….Bye beautiful *kisses ino's hand and smiles*
Ino blushes
Gaara gets on his bike and put on his pantyhose
Gaara: Bye dick face *smiles at sasuke*
Gaara speeds down the road trying to look cool
Sasuke: what a loser *he looks at ino * to his shock she is blushing "you don't actually like him do you"
Ino: why not he so cute
Sasuke rolls his eyes "whatever" they start walking
After 20 minutes of driving gaara runs out of gas.
Gaara: Ahhh fuck…..Im out gas.
Kankuro: I still got gas wanna come on my quad
Gaara: What about my bike
Kankuro: put it on your back its small enough already
Gaara: and just how the hell is it going to fit on my back
Kankuro: I got some rope
Gaara: *gives him a weird look* What the fuck are you carrying around rope for
Kankuro: sometimes I see a really hot chick in the street
Gaara: WHAT THE FUCK YOU RAPE THEM
Kankuro: I didn't say that……I just bring them home
Gaara: still didn't answer my question
Kankuro: I just like rope..
Gaara: Whatever anyway we should get out of the middle of the road before we get hit by a car
Garra ties his mini motorbike to his back and gets on kankuros quad and kankuro drives off to find shikamaru and temari
Gaara: dude we look madd gay
Kankuro: Don't think of it that way its brotherly love Bromance
Gaara: Don't ever say that to me again
Gaara's thoughts
Lets hope sasuke and ino don't see this or he is really gonna have a good time making fun of me
End of thoughts
After a couple of minutes the spot shikamarus car and they look across the street and its temari and shikamaru sitting down at an outdoor café they hide behind some bushes
Shikamaru: Its getting kind of cold do you want to go inside
Temari: Sure
Shikamaru takes her hand helps her up then pulls her close to him and kisses her
Kankuro: Oh my god look at them it sickens me
Gaara: That's it give me some rocks
Kankuro picks up some small rocks and gives gaara some. They both started throwing the rocks at shikamaru carefully trying not to hit their sister.
Shikamaru: Ahh what the fuck…
Temari: whats wrong
Shikamaru: I could of swear someone was throwing rocks at me
Temari: Its probably just the cold lets go inside
Shikamaru: yea maybe your right *smiles and lowers his hand down to her ass as they start walking inside*
After throwing his last rock he notices shikamarus hand then gaara picks up a giant stone
Gaara: AHHHHHHH!!!!!! DIIEEEE YOU SON OF A BITCH
Kankuro: Gaara WHAT THE FUCK *he tackles him to the ground*
Gaara: What the fuck did you do that for
Kankuro: That rock is like Knee high we don't want to kill him you know
Gaara: he had his hand on her ass
Kankuro: sooo
Gaara: look this is how it goes if you put your hands around a girl and if its too high its means you just want to be friends but if its too low it means you just want sex and HIS hands were TOOO LOW
Kankuro: Wh-WHATT! GIVE ME THAT ROCK *he picks up the rock*
Gaara: its too late there gone already
Kankuro: Ahh crap…..i got another idea how much money do you have on you
Gaara: ummm about 10 dollars
Kankuro: Hey me toooo what a coincidence
Gaara: so why are you spending my money
Kankuro: cuase were gonna need it come on lets go
After a couple of minutes they both come out of the 99 cents store with a cardboard poster and markers and sneak under the window were temari and shikamaru are sitting next to and write on the poster "Shikamaru is a Fag I personaly saw him sucking sasuke's dick and he did it like a professional and he hates blonds he only goes out with them because he thinks there easy to bang" next to a drawn picture of shikamaru sucking sasuke. They raise the poster to the window.
Shikamaru: you are as beautiful as the moon just look at it *he looks outside* Wh-WHAT THE FUCK
Temari: Wow…uhh is that true
Shikamaru: OH COMEON of course nottt
Temari: well you did act a little gay when I first met you
Shikamaru: You…You actually think im gay Thats a drawn picture
Temari: *she smirks* your gonna have to show me
Shikamaru: *he smiles then moves close to her and starts to make out with her*
Gaara: What the fuck there making out
Kankuro: Okay plan B lets go to this store I know it has everything we need
10 minutes later the come back with spray paint, eggs, soda and new door locks and condoms and a dildo and rope
Gaara: oookayyy soo tell me whats the dildo condoms and rope for and the can of soda.
Kankuro: well the dildo is gonna prove hes gay, condoms well im running low and I need them but there for us to frame and make it look like he's cheating with another guy. The rope..well because you took mine and in case we need to tie him up and the soda is for me to drink and I saw this really cool thing on youtube.
Gaara: so pretty much you wasted the money
Kankuro: No No were gonna use them trust me anyway spray paint the car and make sure you draw a dick and make sure you point an arrow to it saying im shikamaru and I like penis. Then im gonna egg his car.
Garra: alright sounds like a plan
The boys got busy on shikamarus car and after 25 minutes they finished messing up his car.
Kankuro: alright now all we got to do is cum in theses condoms
Gaara: NO im not jerking off
Kankuro: dude I got the porn on my phone
Garra: No do it yourself
Kankuro: alright..your loss but hey mabey the dildo should be wet….stick it up your ass
Gaara: Kankuro shut the fuck up how about you just use some lube
Kankuro: Alright your loss…….never mind
Gaara: yeaaaaaa
Kankuro runs off in some corner and come back fifteen minutes later
Kankuro: Alright im done
Gaara: Wow dude you're a quick pumper
Kankuro: shut up I was in a rush
Gaara: I guess girls that do it with you get no pleasure *laughs*
Kankuro: Shut the fuck up virgin
Gaara: Better than being a quicky
Kankuro: just slip these in the car
Gaara: I ain't touching that shit
Kankuro: ok whatever but we need to put the dildo and condoms in there sooooo
Gaara: how we going to get in
Kankuro: SODA CAN
Gaara: huh? We pick the car with that
Kankuro: yep go inside the café and get a cup while I put lube on this didlo
Gaara: dude you carry around lube
Kankuro: you never know when a girl might feel horny you know………..tight fit………………..oh weight you don't know *laughs*
Gaara: shut up bitch *walks in cafe staring at shikamaru* ugh look at him
Gaara spot shikamaru rub temari's leg from under the table
Gaara: *slams his fist on the counter and every one stares at him* ahhhh fuck im caught for sure I dead…………………. DEAD temari's going to kill me well I'm not going out without a fight
*gaara gets a cup a straw and some napkins and he's spits spitballs and shikamaru while running out the restaurant*
Gaara: HAAHAAA
Shikamaru: who the fuck as that
Temari: I don't know
Shikamaru: I'm about to kick his ass
Temari: noo forget about *smiles and kisses him*
Shikamaru: ok *kisses her back*
Gaara: there fucking………………………….NASTY
Kankuro: you have the cup
Gaara: yea here why you need it
Kankuro: to pour the soda out
Gaara: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT you made go in there risking my life so you can pour the soda in a cup
Kankuro: yeah man I don't want to waste it * pours soda in cup and made lockpick then picks lock*
Gaara: you are so annoying
Kankuro: yep I no *put the condoms and dildo in the car*
Gaara: alright so we got him now
Kankuro: yep tomorrow she'll be a single girl then we find a guy for her that we like
Gaara: So what do we do now
Kankuro: let's go home brother *get on bike* get on bro
Gaara: ok *gets on back of quad bike *
Kankuro: *drives off *
After 30 minutes of driving they see shikamaru and temari driving smiling and laughing and shikamaru has the dildo in his hand and throws it out the window
Kankuro: DID YOU SEE THAT
Gaara: I know 20 dollars wasted man
Kankuro: NOT that…………..that's your money how come he's not tied to the car beat up with an angry tomato head temari
Gaara: if they won't break up. It's time to make his life miserable
Kankuro: how do you even drive a car with a penis on it?
Gaara: HE"S GAY that's why
Kankuro: time for plan C
Gaara: that means we have to travel all the way to shikamaru's house
Kankuro: YEP'
Kankuro makes a u-turn and drives to shikamaru's house 50 minutes later they get there
Gaara gets off after kankuro
Kanuro: ok let's do this
Gaara get out the toilet tissue new locks and spray paint
They get to work kankuro changes the locks on shikamaru door while gaara writes ALL GAY MEN OVER HERE ORGY NIGHT MONDAY-FRIDAY and he draws a bunch on penis' and writes NO GIRLS ALOUD
They finish and look at their master piece
Kankuro- what the fuck he got on that one
Gaara throws toilet paper all over the house
Gaara: lets go home
Kankuro: yep *he get on the quad* oh man we have no gas
Gaara: WHAT no gas that means we have to…….
Kankuro: Walk I know
Gaara: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MEEEE
Kankuro: karma's a bitch
Gaara: I know
They start walking after 10 minutes it start raining
Gaara: I hate this
Kankuro: I know right
Gaara: yep
Kankuro: and guess what it raining
Gaara: I NOTICED!!!!
Gaara Thoughts
God this sucks walking in the rain pulling a mini motor bike I look so gay then I have my retarded brother starting pointless conversations with me today life suck we are not spies FUCK THIS we look like retards with pantyhose on our heads I hope the cops don't pull over and ask us if we are high or drunk
End of thoughts
They get home an hour later and notice temari still not there
Kankuro: do you think
Gaara: nooo she couldn't
Kankuro: she probably fucking the shit out of shikamaru
Gaara: we left her there to fuck him
Kankuro: we are idiots
Gaara: I know
They each go to their rooms and 30 minutes later they hear the door open and rush down stairs
TEMARI WE MISSED YOU
Temari: ………………….okay
Kankuro: rushes for a hug and smells her to check for the smell of sex
Temari: what the hell are you doing
Kankuro: ohhh nothing can't hug my sister
Temari: whatever
Gaara and kankuro go upstairs
Gaara: did you smell anything
Kankuro: nope but she probably showered
Gaara: damn
Temari: ohh and just to tell you guy I did not have sex
Gaara and Kankuro jump for joy " YESSSS" then go there separate ways and go to sleep
Temari laughs takes a shower and goes to bed
DEAR JOURNAL
Today me and kankuro did some stupid things we spied on temari when she went on that date with fag head shikadick we tried hard to mess it up my making a gay poster vandalizing his car and house. None of those desperate act worked and I wasted 20 buck on a dildo that did not even phase them so then we go to his house teepee it and change the locks and write a message to all gay men nothing fucking worked makes me hate him more on when I was looking for my sister I saw the bitch sasuke but I killed him even if he got lip action with ino I still killed him I know it by the look on ino's face
Lesson Learned:
Sincerely Yours
Gaara