Later that day, a huge storm rolled in and Hansa was forced to go back inside, literally being dragged back by Alucard's various shadow tendrils. How she loved the rain and the art of a storm! How she loved to howl in the rain and let Mother Nature's fury at work! But it was all ruined, ruined by a vampire and the Judas Priest that had helped him drag her back. By the time they had gotten her off of the beach, she was wrapped like a mummy in shadow and with holy scriptures keeping her bound.
She growled deeply and snapped and bit at the shadows and paper, but it was to no avail. The two had already gotten her inside. She finally relented and Alucard let her go, grinning widely as his shadow form returned to him and he stared at his hand. Hansa tore his arm off at the elbow and threw it to the ground. Alucard shrugged.
"That's too bad. I was gonna use that hand later." Hansa caved his chest in with a punch. Anderson scratched his unshaven face guiltily.
"He's got a game of scrabble later. He's gonna need both hands fer thaet game," he said in a thick Celtic accent. Hansa glared daggers into the vampire's back as he sank into the floor. The lycanthrope grumbled and made her way to the elevator where Seras was holding the button for her. Schrodinger was standing in the corner, eyes glimmering as Hansa entered the cramped compartment. She ignored him as the elevator went up and deposited them on the third floor. Schrodinger ran off to his room and a huge crack of thunder rocked the building.
Schrodinger's ears flattened and he teleported out of sight. Hansa scratched behind her ear and Seras took her arm. The draculina dragged Hansa to their room and opened the door, only to find Schrodinger curled up in a ball on the sofa. Seras closed the door behind them and furrowed her brow. Schrodinger cringed as thunder cracked again and shook the building lightly. The lycanthrope sat down next to cat boy and put an arm around his shoulder. Seras sat down opposite of him and leaned her head against his.
"Vat are ve going to do vit you?" Hansa asked to no one in particular. Schrodinger shivered with fear from the thunder.
"Well, maybe he could stay here…just for tonight," Seras offered. Hansa shook her head. She looked Schrodinger in the eyes.
"You're a big boy now, so hurry back to your room and go to sleep. It'll be varm under ze covers, okay?" Schrodinger nodded slowly and teleported away in the blink of an eye. Seras breathed a sigh of relief. Hansa laid flat on the length of the sofa and put her legs over Seras' thighs. The younger of the two looked up at the ceiling and smiled faintly.
"I'm jealous of you Hansa," she said, almost in an admitting way.
"Vhy?" the werewolf asked, a bit confused.
"Well…you're hot no matter what gender you are. I'm jealous because Master looked at you like he's never looked at me before."
"Und you think zat's because he vants to have sex vit me?" Hansa asked, straight to the point. Seras flushed red and looked the other way.
"Well, not exactly. I mean- that's not it really…but, he looks at you like he enjoys your presence. And…what you mentioned before."
"Don't be jealous frauline. Inside he burns up because I have not been tampered vit. I am a natural monster, und he knows zat I'm still a man up here," the werewolf replied as she tapped herself on the head. Seras' lip pouted.
"But you have such nice breasts! I can't match up to you!" It was Hansa's turn to blush and look away. She still thought that the extra weight her chest had gained was simply a nuisance and something that made her slower in a fight. It definitely did make it awkward to wear anything tight.
"I have big breasts? Ha! Vhen Schrodinger came back to ze HQ after seeing you, he vouldn't stop talking about his booby qveen," Hansa retorted with a smirk. Seras pouted her lip again, but there was a faint smile too. She ran a hand up Hansa's thigh and leaned over. Hansa felt a chill climb up her spine and reach her neck. Seras' hand crawled up further, tracing the inside of her thigh.
"You're so pretty. You do know what two girls do when they're alone, and have some free time on top of that," she said with a smirk. Hansa felt something grow warmer between her legs and growled.
"Nein. I'm not going to do zis unless I can get some fun out of it. Vait until I'm a man again frauline, und I'll do exactly zat." Seras' hand reached the lining of Hansa's bikini. The werewolf felt the heat between er legs get warmer, and a light pink blush crossed over her cheeks. How was the feeling this much different from what it was like as a male?! Seras leaned in close and Hansa raised her hands against her friend. It was no use. Her body was barely obeying her.
"Just kidding!" Seras exclaimed, grinning like a Cheshire cat. Hansa scowled and kicked Seras off, heading for the shower. "But Hansa!" Seras cried.
"No, don…don't play like zat! Zat vasn't funny!" Hansa yelled as she slammed the shower door. Oh, if she had her real body, she'd have broken the draculina's hips with her own. This wasn't funny, this was just plain cruel!
"Hey, Anderson, let's go see what the others are doing," Enrico suggested. Father Anderson looked at his superior and arched an eyebrow.
"Eh? What's yer hurry? We got all tomorrae and tha day after thaet tae!" he replied, debating whether or not he should take off his coat. He had no idea what was going through the archbishop's head. The man didn't ever work, and Anderson was always left to clean up his messes too! But the archbishop simply rubbed his hands together sneakily.
"We'll go to that Protestant whore's room first, and then we'll get that Nazi bastard. What should we do to them, draw on them, shaving cream on the palm?" he suggested in a hushed tone. Anderson cracked a smile. Enrico was still just a kid. All he wanted to do was pull a few childish pranks, no harm there. Anderson buttoned up his coat and opened the door.
"After ye, Archbishop sir," he said in almost a sarcastic tone. Enrico pulled on a black coat and swiftly walked out the door. Outside, the lights were all out and all was quiet, save for the soft pitter-patter of the rain outside and the occasional soft rumble of thunder in the distance. Anderson thought that this place felt like home, up until the part where Enrico tugged on his collar. The tall paladin leaned down and Enrico whispered into his ear.
"Hey, let's try Integra's room first. Her pet should be running about trying to scare the life out of some children right now," he said with a slight grin. Anderson knew better. Alucard was probably waiting for them on the other side of the door, but Enrico was an archbishop, and he'd yell very loud if Anderson failed to do what he said. The paladin sighed in defeat and walked all the way down to the other side of the hallway, single Hungarian bayonet in hand. He reached the doorway and stopped to listen for anything odd.
Not a sound could be heard besides the rain outside, so he drew back his arm and pushed the bayonet into the door's automated lock. He twisted the blade and the door unlocked easily, letting even Enrico push it open without any effort whatsoever. The archbishop quickly set to work finding his way around in the dark room. He waved Anderson over in the incredibly dim light and pointed to a figure on the couch.
"That must be her. Only someone like her would so lazily throw themselves on a couch like that when there's a bed not ten steps away. C'mon, I have some of your shaving cream with me," Enrico said. Anderson was tempted to snatch the bottle back and wake Integra. That's why he hadn't been able to shave! Enrico had stolen his shaving cream! The paladin silently removed his bayonet from the door and stepped behind the archbishop, who set to work on one knee, trying to find Integra's hand.
Before he could do anything, however, there was a shiny pole pressed firmly against his neck. Anderson heard a few clicking noises behind him.
"I didn't think you'd actually do it. Trying to assassinate your rival, huh?" Integra asked from the couch, sliding her silver blade against the holy man's neck. Anderson simply watched. Enrico could really learn a lesson here! Anderson turned around to leave, but found that another dark figure blocked his way. This one was a man with a large fedora on his head and with a dog at his side, a dog with six glowing red eyes.
"Help me you idiot," Enrico whispered furiously to Anderson, tugging on his pant leg. The paladin paid no attention as the doorway was swallowed by darkness, leaving eight red eyes to shine though.
"Scream all you want, you're not going to be heard," Alucard said in a malicious tone, Baskerville growling at his side. Anderson drew up more bayonets from his coat and held his arms out to his sides.
"Good nae. I wouldn't want tae wake anyone else wit this fight. Let's rumble, in the name of God, AMEN!" Anderson leapt at Alucard and Baskerville, a frenzied look on his face. Maybe Enrico's decision to sneak in here hadn't been such a bad one after all.
Jan Valentine sat on the floor with a scowl on his face. Luke sat in a chair not far away, almost happy that his brother hadn't gotten his way for once. Jan was so ticked off that the Paladin, Father Anderson, had prevented his raping of a girl today. Luke simply chuckled softly as his brother gave him the finger, a dark aura around him.
"Why the fuck was he so worried?! It's not like I was gonna kill her or anything! I was just gonna rape her!" he stated, fuming angry that he'd been stabbed through the heels and been left unable to walk for the next few hours until Dok fixed him up like usual. Luke simply tried to pass the time by reading, but Jan's books, every single book to his name, were pornographic. And frankly, some of them were just disturbing. Luke tossed his brother the latest issue of Playboy and put his head in his palm.
"I'm going out for some fresh air. You do whatever you need to do while I'm gone," he said, quietly leaving his brother alone. Jan didn't even move for the magazine. Luke shrugged as he closed the door behind him. Maybe Jan was changing? He heard the ruffling of a magazine cover and shook his head. Maybe he was staying the same after all, who knew?
He walked about half way down the hallway before he found that one of the doors was still unlocked. Being the good-natured person he had been known to be, (except towards Alucard) he gently opened the door to tell whoever was inside that they should lock their door before Jan got loose and decided that he was in need of a woman to ease his anger. But behind the door, he found a very strange surprise awaiting him.
"Er…am I interrupting something?" he asked nervously as Yumiko Takagi sat on the floor before him, a blank look written all over her face…her body garbed only in her undergarments. She looked like she was doing something indecent to herself. Yumiko flushed bright red and then her eyes took on a different look, one of rage and malicious intent. She grinned evilly and stood up, grabbing her katana off of a nearby chair.
"Get over here suit boy. You're just in time to help me, because this kinda stuff is hard by yerself," she said, slamming the door shut with her sheathed katana. Luke cringed with fear. She was going to kill him with that thing! But instead of ramming her katana through his gut, she grabbed him by the collar and dragged him back into her bedroom.
"Stop it! Not like this!" Luke yelled, but Yumie paid no attention at all.
"Hell yes, like this. I'll make you scream my fucking name by the end of the night, even if I have to cut you up to do it," she said in a threatening tone. Lightning struck and thunder rumbled loudly. Luke's scream in terror was drowned out by nature's will to have him kept here all night. Yumie unsheathed her long blade and threw Luke onto the bed roughly. The vampire shivered with fear. He'd be lucky to see the next dawn, that is if he could by any slim chance survive the night…
Hansa shrugged as what seemed to be a faint scream died down with the sudden blast of loud thunder. She curled back up under the covers, back to back with Seras, seeing as there was only one bed in the room and there were two occupants. Hansa had no idea how Seras had convinced her to paint her toenails and say who she would sleep with, and it couldn't be a girl, which would have to make Hansa's choice make her seem gay in reality. She was still a man at heart. And the game wasn't fair! Hansa didn't have a master she was bound to and had to choose as her life-long lover!
But even still, she had chosen after a while. But Seras had laughed at her. Who else among these dirty assholes would she want to sleep with?! She had only chosen Schrodinger because it would have been over quickly, and he'd do whatever she told him to…
Hansa tugged roughly on her ears and growled very softly. How dare Seras make her think gay thoughts! She'd get the draculina back one way or another. And her vengeance was never swift. It took weeks for her to get over something, and this was a big issue. Well, at least Seras hadn't forced her to use pink nail polish. She had brought a few of the good colors, and gray was the only color Hansa would use. Fortunately, Seras had been smart enough to get some, and Hansa now had gray toenails.
She sighed briefly and pulled the covers further up to her cheeks. She really wanted some sleep. Today had been one sick joke by the Major and Dok. How dare they turn him into a girl! He'd get them both back for sure. Before she could contemplate what she was going to do to them, a very soft noise interrupted her and her ears shot straight up. An intruder!
"Kapitan…" A massive thunderclap sent a chill down Hansa's spine.
"Schrodinger? I thought-"
"Please don't be mad Kapitan. I'm…I'm scared. I don't vant to be alone Kapitan. Pl-please let me sleep here tonight. I promise I'll be good," he whispered, tears in his eyes. Hansa felt sorry for him. Schrodinger had always come to her room back at the HQ whenever there was a storm and curled up in a ball until it was over. However annoying it was, there had never a word spoken between them then, the werewolf quietly watching over the cat boy until the storm had passed, or he had fallen asleep, whichever one came first. Hansa stood up and walked over to Schrodinger.
"Shhh…don't vorry. Hansa ist here to make things better," she said, cradling the boy's head against her chest. She practically carried Schrodinger into the next room and lay down on the sofa, letting him curl up onto a ball. She hugged him to her body and his trembling ceased. She breathed a sigh of relief and put her cheek against his.
"Goodnight Schrodinger," she said. The cat boy actually purred softly like a cat before answering.
"Goodnight Hansa," he replied meekly, simply snuggling up closer to her as he continued to purr. Hansa planned to go back to her own bed when Schrodinger fell asleep, but she wound up leaving consciousness with him and falling asleep, curled up with him on the sofa. Not that it really mattered much, but Schrodinger's boxers seemed to be a little tight against her thigh…
A/N: Okay, I NEED REVIEWS PEOPLE! If you liked it, or any part of it for that matter, then tell me! I need to know! Thanks. =D