CHAPTER 3:Cinderella, another story
"OI!" howled Renji. His voice did miracles. The crowd hushed. "I got all that Cinderella casting written down. Anymore ideas?"
The crowd started muttering between themselves once again. A hand went up after a while.
"Yo!" shouted Shunsui.
"You got an idea Kyouraku?" asked Kira.
"Yeah. Considering that we're doing Cinderella…why don't we do a cracked version of Cinderella. Like one where there are two guys and a fairy godfather or something like that. You know, those funny ones that manipulate the Cinderella story line."
"What? Does that mean guy on guy stuff?" asked Hisagi. "Ew."
"Nah, I don't mean that. There's no need for romance in this," said Shunsui. "It's just for laughs."
"What about, the 'Cinderella' gets bullied and kicked around by his two stepbrothers and stepfather?" chirped Yachiru randomly. She was seated on Kenpachi's shoulder. Renji, Hisagi and Kira exchanged glances.
"Ok, why not," said Renji. "Now let's do the casting!" Indeed, these plays seemed like they would be rather…rough. "Who's Cinderella? We're getting a male to do that part this time aren't we?" And we better change the name. A guy can't go around being called Cinderella, thought Renji.
"You, coz then we can call you a ranga!" shouted Ikkaku. Renji's vein popped. Ikkaku seemed to be trying to piss him off every single time!
"NO, why don't you be Cinderella so that we can laugh at your bald head?" Renji yelled back.
"Renji…I think you would be good as Cinderella," commented Hitsugaya. Renji stared at him in disbelief.
"How could you Toshirou? How could you possibly agree with that retard? My hair colour was and still perfectly fine!!" screamed Renji. He then scuttled away to hide/cry in the corner of the stage.
"Toshirou, you made Renji sad!" said Hinamori, frowning at Histsugaya.
"Eh, like I care."
Hisagi decided that he take Renji's position. He scrawled the name 'Abarai Renji' into the Cinderella: another version slot. "Renji is Cinderella!"
Ikkaku cheered. The next role though, it would be interesting to see who got it.
"Who shall be the prince?" asked Hisagi, smirking. Renji and a prince…how interesting, thought Hisagi. A hand instantly shot up. "What ya got Rukia?"
The black haired girl stood up and yelled, "BYAKUYA KUCHIKI!"
Several gasps could be heard. Woah, Byakya and Renji, get a load of that. Byakuya turned and glared at his adopted sister.
"I now disown you. You are not my sister," said Byakuya coldly.
"I'm sure you won't do that, my dear brother."
Hisagi laughed. Oh, this was getting amusing. He looked at Kira questioningly.
"Yeah, put him down," said Kira.
"And Byakuya Kuchiki is the prince!" announced Hisagi. Byakuya growled and fumed silently. Damn school, damn Rukia, he thought.
"The next roles will be the two step siblings and step parent!" exclaimed Hisagi.
"US HISAGI, US!" screamed Ikkaku, flailing his arms in the air.
"What us? I only see you jumping up and down," said Kira.
"Me, Yumichika and…"
"Kenny! Kenny can be the stepfather!" yelled out Yachiru.
"Um…what do the rest of you think of that…" asked Kira. Hisagi thought it was a good idea, so he put Ikkaku and Yumichika in the stepbrothers slot and Kenpachi in the stepfather. He hadn't got the consent of the rest of the school yet, but, what gives?
"Alright, next role shall be the godmother or father!" declared Hisagi.
"But they haven't agreed to Ikkaku and—"
"Oh screw them. Godfather! Anyone! Hands up!" yelled Hisagi, projecting his voice across the hall so that everyone could hear.
"SHUNSUI!" yelled out Ukitake.
"Hmm, that sounds good. Kyouraku was the one who gave this idea in the first place," said Hisagi as he was about to write his name in. But then he stopped. Someone had called out.
"URAHARA!" It was Yoruichi.
"Yoruichi-san, that's not very nice. I don't want that role," replied Urahara.
"Who needs to be nice to you?" replied Yoruichi.
"YES! Urahara suits that role better than I do!" called out Shunsui. Ah, he didn't want to do any practice for a stupid play. It meant work for him!
"Right…" muttered Hisagi, writing 'Urahara Kisuke' clearly in the book. "And I think that's it…we'll work out the other background people."
"What background people?" asked Kira.
"You know, the ones who are also at the 'ball' thing…" Hisagi thought for a moment. "Which reminds me, how do we manipulate Cinderella?"
X.X.X.X.X.X.X.X
"Once upon a time, there was a very unfortunate boy called Renji. His father had died first, then his mother. Before his mother had died though, she had married a man called Kenpachi who brought his two sons along too. So now, the four were stuck together. And believe me, Renji got owned," narrated Shunsui. Oh, they just had to give him work in the end, didn't they?
"Oi, wipe that place, you've already wiped here twice Renji," said Ikkaku savagely, kicking the Renji who was on the ground, wiping the floors. Renji sprawled across the ground after the kick. What could he do? He hated them all, his two 'brothers' and vicious 'father'. If he fought with one of them, the other two would avenge the other and bash up Renji.
Renji blinked away a tear and continued to crawl around wiping the floor. They had no mop.
"Oh, everybody!!" came Yumichika's shrill voice, waving an envelope in the air. Renji looked up at the girl man. "Not you ranga, this is none of your business."
"Wassup," greeted Kenpachi casually, strolling into the room, totally ignoring Renji.
"Oh daddy, look, we got an invitation to Prince Byakuya's tournament for the strongest warrior!" cried Yumichika, looking awfully happy. Renji looked up. He'd always wanted to show his strength and power…but his 'family' always got in the way.
"AHAHA! I SHALL SHOW THE WORLD HOW AWESOME I AM!! No one will be able to defeat me!" yelled Ikkaku. Their father, Kenpachi ripped the letter from Yumichika's grasp and read it himself.
"Oh, this will be a very good chance to show my abilities!" bellowed Kenpachi who then started laughing crazily. "I will be unbeatable!!" He grabbed his sword off a sword rack and began randomly swishing it around, causing vases and plates to crack and smash and fall to the ground as the sword connected with all of them.
Renji frowned. Kenpachi had just destroyed a bunch of things. Oh, now he had to clean up! Renji stood up and faced the rest of the people in the house. He had never considered them as family.
"Can I go too?" he asked. At once he regretted it. He sounded so weak and feeble, like he was pleading to go. No, the letter had said that everyone of the household go. Renji was not a slave, he was a member of the household.
"You? You can't even fight!" said Ikkaku, taking what Renji said as a hilarious joke.
"I'm not joking. And yes I can fight, thank you very much, Ikkaku," said Renji, glowering at the man. Renji had to show them authority. He was a man, he couldn't let other people control his life! But guess what, he had already let them do so for the last couple of years.
"You will not go," said Kenpachi. That was the end the conversation. But Renji would not let if finish so easily.
"Why? Why can't I go?" Renji asked, firmly but angrily this time.
"Coz you're a ranga!" said Ikkaku with a smirk. Renji narrowed his eyes at him. Damn Ikkaku…
"Well, you're bald!" yelled Renji, pointing accusingly at Ikkaku. "And you're freaking homosexual!" This time he pointed to Yumichika. "And you're a maniac!" Renji's voice had risen to a scream when his finger finally landed on Kenpachi.
This time, all three of them laughed crazily. "And you, Renji, are a ranga!" they yelled unison.
"Get to work, or I'll beat the crap outta ya!" shouted Kenpachi, shoving Renji aside.
"You won't be going to the tournament. That's final!" said Yumichika with a very, very creepily evil smirk as he proudly walked away.
Ikkaku though, didn't seem like he was going to leave anytime soon. He repeatedly thrust a fist into his open palm as if he was about to fight. "Any last words?" he asked. Indeed, he was planning to bash up the little red head.
"My hair is better, coz you don't have any."
Ikkaku growled, ticked off by Renji's comment.
"Stupid last words," said Ikkaku as he raised his fist to punch Renji. Normally, Renji would just accept the blows and be off. But this time, Renji didn't want to back down. He grabbed Ikkaku's attacking fist and flung him to the floor.
"Don't touch me." And that was all Renji said before he left to his bedroom, the attic. The lounge was still an epic mess.
X.X.X.X.X.X.X.X
"Oh father! What should I wear?" asked Yumichika, clearly excited that he was going to the tournament. Oh, I totally want to meet Prince Byakuya! thought Yumichika.
"Yumichika, it says here clearly, that we are to wear our proper shinigami outfits with our zanpakutou. So we're not allowed to wear whatever we want," said Ikkaku, already in his black shihakushou, strapping his sword to the white waist belt.
"Aw, damn, I don't get to flaunt what I have!" complained Yumichika, pouting.
"Is Yumichika showing his true self here?" asked Hisagi quietly, down below as the audience.
"Oh of course, I'd be doing the same thing if I were him!" replied Matsumoto, her breasts practically jiggling in Hisagi's face, supposedly 'flaunting'. Hisagi facepalmed.
"Oi, Kenpachi! You done yet?" yelled Ikkaku. Geez, what took their old man so long? Renji was sitting away from them, surveying their actions. He wanted to go…but he had neither shinigami outfit nor a sword, what was he going to do?
Kenpachi strode into the lounge. His hair was gelled into points with bells attached to the end. Everyone, including Renji, stared at the father. He usually had his hair down. Now it was all done up, and he even wore an eyepatch, so as to make him look menacing.
"What the fuck…" was all Ikkaku could manage.
"Oh father, that is not fashionable!" shrieked Yumichika. "What is with that hair? We must fix it up for you, right now!"
"What! I want my hair like this. I think it looks good, so shut up you two brats!" Kenpachi flicked a look at Renji. "Stop gaping, ranga!"
Renji turned away, and started wiping the dining table. Wow, Kenpachi was really into this tournament.
"Alright, let's go. Renji, you stay here and do all the housework. If you leave the house, I will personally murder you!" shouted Kenpachi.
"I haven't changed yet!" said Yumichika, running to his room.
"Hurry up! You don't wanna miss your Prince Byakuya do you?" asked Ikkaku. He glared at Renji as he recalled the moment where Renji had actually fought back. Renji met his glare and the two exchanged death glares, having a mini mind battle while Yumichika got changed.
"I'm done everyone!" announced Yumichika. Ikkaku looked at his brother and looked shocked.
"What's with your eyebrows? Are they peacock feathers? Ew."
"These are very—"
"Hurry up you two, I'm not gonna wait all day," barked Kenpachi. The two brothers stopped their bickering and shuffled out the door. Ikkaku shot a final look at Renji. He gave him the finger before the door shut behind him.
"Faggot," muttered Renji. He sighed. Now he had to do all the washing up, the housework, the cleaning! Damn the world! thought Renji. He looked at the clock on the wall. It was 6:30. When did the tournament end again? Renji forgot. He sat for a few moments, relishing in the silence. He loved it whenever the three of them went out. Afterwards, he picked up a feather duster and started dusting the area. Halfway through, he got distracted and started practising his sword skills with the ridiculously pink feather duster. He slashed left, he swiped right. Renji sighed, he would never be able to show the extent of his skill.
Suddenly, a puff of smoke appeared in front of him. Renji raised his feather duster in combat mode, ready to attack. Oh yes, it was a very vicious weapon, was it not?
"Hello!" greeted the person who appeared from the pink smoke. He was wearing a green and white striped hat and held a folding fan and cane.
"Who the hell are you?" deadpanned Renji.
"Aw, that's no way to greet your fairy godfather!" replied the supposed fairy godfather. He opened the fan and started fanning himself.
"What happened to my fairy godmother?" asked Renji.
"Oh, her…" the man looked to the side shiftily. "She got turned into a black cat."
"Is that me?" asked Yoruichi, watching Urahara act on the stage.
"I think so? Who else but you would be the 'black cat'?" asked Soi Fon as she fondled one of her black kitty key rings.
"I am Urahara! Nice to see you Renji! Now, do you want to do to the tournament being held by Prince Byakuya?" asked Urahara.
"Yes! I really want to show my abilities and how strong I really am!" exclaimed Renji. Did his fairy godfather have a way?
"I have a way!"
"Oh really?"
"Ya really!"
"Yes! Please tell!"
"I will use my magical abilities to give you what you need. You better get there quick, or you'll be late and miss the tournament all together!" exclaimed Urahara. He raised his cane and like dubbing, he patted the end of the cane on both of Renji's shoulders. Urahara then stared to mutter incoherent words, like a chant, and Renji felt energy surge into him.
"Are you giving me steroids?" asked Renji. His fairy godfather did not reply. Finally, the rambling stopped. With a flick of a wrist, a black shihakusho appeared on Renji.
"The shinigami outfit!" shrieked Renji. How he had always wanted one. With another flick of the wrist, a sword appeared at Renji's waist.
"And to make you look cool, I shall replace your eyebrows with tattoos…"
Before Renji had any chance to say 'NO', tattoos had already appeared on his skin. "Why? Ahhhh, I have creepy tattoos! Where did my eyebrows go?"
Urahara ignored Renji's complaints. "And I will give you a cloth headband thing…" A white head band appeared on his forehead.
"ENOUGH!" yelled Renji. "Stop giving me so many changes to my appearance!"
"Oh, alright then. Hmm, you'll need to get there fast though. I'll give you the ability to shunpo!" cried out Urahara. Once again, he raised the cane.
"What the hell is shunpo?" asked Renji.
"It is the ability to flash step!" said Urahara mysteriously. Once again, he mumbled a chant. "There we go! Now go boy, go and show the world what you can do!!" Urahara shoved the red head out the door. "Be sure to get back before midnight!" yelled Urahara. Renji gave a thumbs up sign and flash stepped out into the night.
X.X.X.X.X.X.X.X
"Renji sliced at his opponent, taking another one down. The competitors of the tournament who had already lost cheered on the sidelines. This was the final battle; the winning competitors had fought against each other for the honour to fight with Prince Byakuya. And Renji had just won," said Shunsui into the microphone.
Byakuya, observing all the duels from a high backed seat, stood up gracefully and descended a few steps and walked towards Renji.
"Oh my god, it's Prince Byakuya!" said Omaeda with a gasp. He was a competitor in the tournament. Sadly, he had lost on the first round. How shameful.
"The red head's going to fight with the all awesome Prince!" exclaimed Isane with a squeal, also a competitor in the tournament. "The red head's good." Isane had fought and lost to Renji in one of the duels.
"So you're the Prince who's caught everyone's attention eh? Let's see how good you really are," called out Renji with a smirk.
Byakuya laughed. "Ah, you have done well, to fight to this stage. Good job. Let's have some fun with this duel, shall we?" He laughed again as he drew his sword.
His laugh though, sounded strained to the ears of the audience. Everyone knew about Byakuya's uncaring and cold appearance. He never laughed, he never talked like that.
"Byakuya's very out of character," whispered Rukia, sniggering. Oh, she was so proud of herself for pushing Byakuya forward as the Prince.
"What do you expect, it's a play!" replied Kaien, grinning. Ah, Byakuya Kuchiki. This was very amusing, to see Byakuya go fully out of character for a play.
"Little Bya-chan must have thrown away a lot of dignity and his high-and-mighty pride away to do this," said Yoruichi with a smirk. "I'm glad I told the script writers to put that in."
Renji couldn't help grinning. After all their rehearsals, he still couldn't get over Byakuya making an attempt to be happy. LOL, thought Renji.
"Let us fight!" shouted Byakuya. I will seriously kill whoever wrote these lines for me! thought Byakuya.
"I will be the one who defeats you!" Renji yelled out, unleashing(1) his sword on Byakuya. There was a slash, a clang, and thump, a kick. The battle lasted for ages. Neither seemed tired and they were both eager to fight on. The two attacked at the same time and deadlocked.
"You fight well, what is your name?" asked Byakuya. Renji looked into the man's eyes and saw a hint of sadness/hatred/why the fuck am I in the play sort of feeling. He flinched. Byakuya must hate his role big time.
"I'll tell you my name, if you win me!" taunted Renji as he shoved Byakuya away and attacked again. He swiped at the long haired man who dodged the attack and stabbed at Renji in return.
Despite the clash and clang of their swords, the twelve low, dull chimes of the clock rang and projected its soundwaves across the whole room. The chiming signalled it was midnight. Renji gasped. "Be sure to get back before midnight!" Those words rang in his ears. Urahara had told him so as he left the house. He didn't know why, but Urahara was his fairy godfather, so everything the man did was for Renji's own good, wasn't it?
Damn, he couldn't finish off the battle. Byakuya was indeed a worthy opponent. Renji swiped to get some distance between himself and the Prince before bolting for the huge double doors of the hall.
"Where are you going, oh worthy opponent!" yelled Byakuya, instantly chasing after the red head.
The whole audience cracked up at Byakuya saying such a thing. Byakuya recoiled at the laughing, but continued to run after Renji.
Renji turned to look at the man before flash stepping a bit forward, trying to get away from Byakuya. The magic and powers that Urahara had bestowed upon Renji were wearing off. The white head band on his head dissolved away into the night as Renji burst through the doors of Byakuya's palace.
"Why, why are you leaving so suddenly?" screamed Byakuya, relentlessly chasing Renji.
Renji finally stopped, and turned around. "Sorry." Then he flash stepped back home, leaving Byakuya all alone in the night. Byakuya tightened his fist into a ball.
"And I thought I had finally found myself a worthy opponent. Well, I did, but he's run off. We will never get to finish our battle. How strange, why did he leaving all of a sudden, just like that?" asked Byakuya, talking to himself. Just as he was about to turn away, he spotted a light shape on the ground in front of him. He walked towards it and picked it up.
It was a sandal.
A shinigami outfit sandal. No doubt it had belonged to the mysterious red head warrior!
"Yes! I might just now be able to find my fellow opponent!" called out Byakuya in glee. He skipped back into his palace, cuddling the new found sandal of Abarai Renji.
X.X.X.X.X.X.X.X
"You know, that guy who ran away while fighting Prince Byakuya, dontcha think he kinda looked like the ranga?" asked Ikkaku as ignoring Renji's presence. When did they ever acknowledge him anyway? If they did, it would be a shove, a yell, a curse word or a demand. Fuck them, thought Renji. They were pathetic,I didn't see any of them during the tournament. They must have lost in one of the earlier rounds.
"Nonsense, that guy can't fight, how could it possibly be him?" replied Kenpachi.
"Do you reckon the Prince saw me?" asked Yumichika, fluttering his peacock feathered eyelashes. He hadn't taken them off after the tournament. Neither had Kenpachi, his hair was still gelled.
"'Course not, you're too fugly," replied Ikkaku. Yumichika glared at him and was about to hit his brother when the door bell rang. Renji looked up, who the hell would come to their home?
"Ooo, I'll get it!" Yumichika rushed to the door and opened it. Then he gasped. "Oh! Byakuya-sama! What a pleasure to see you here? Can I help you?" After he had said so, Ikkaku and Kenpachi rushed towards to door as well. "Oh Prince Byakuya! How are you?" The three kept asking questions, and Byakuya had no chance to tell them why he was there.
"SHUT UP!" yelled Byakuya. The three cringed. Renji smirked. Go the prince! thought Renji. He could never make the three cringe like that.
"I am here to find the owner of this sandal. I believe he is the worthy opponent I was fighting last night," explained Byakuya. Renji smiled. Last night's battle was indeed fun. Such as shame, it would never be finished… The three standing at the door blocked Renji's view of the Prince.
"Oh, I lost my sandal on the way home! It must be mine!" lied Yumichika, eager to try it on before Ikkaku could. He slipped if foot in. It was too small. "Oh look, it fits! I'm the one you're trying to find!"
"Dude, anyone can see its way too big for you," complained Ikkaku. "Lemme try." He shoved his foot into the sandal but was too small for him. He squeezed his foot into the small shoe and succeeded. "Look, it's me! You found be Prince Byakuya!"
"Sorry mister, but I think the sandal is too small for you. You foot is threatening to break the sandal material," stated Byakuya. "I think I should go…"
"I SHALL TRY!" bellowed Kenpachi.
"Sir, you foot is at least twice the size of the sandal. Don't bother. I guess there is no point tallying here, I shall go next door and—"
"Allow me, Prince Byakuya."
Renji walked towards them. It's time I do what I want to do, thought Renji. His 'family' glared at him. Renji could hear their thoughts. Bastard, don't even try… thought Ikkaku. Renji smiled his best smile at the Prince and put the sandal on.
It was a perfect fit.
Byakuya's eyes widened. He had found his fellow opponent. "I have found you, my worthy opponent!" he shrieked. He grabbed Renji's arm. "Come me, let us finish the battle!"
"Yes, let's." Renji turned around and gave his family a final glare. He looked at them with disdain, then it turned into a smirk. "Cya, brothers and father," he said sarcastically before turning back to the cheerful Prince Byakuya. The two linked arms and skipped off the stage.
"And Prince Byakuya and Renji skipped off into sunset and they lived and fought happily ever after!" chirped Shunsui, the narrator. "The end!"
Everyone in the play came out and bowed as the audience cheered and clapped. Rukia laughed. "A cheerful Byakuya! How rare!"
After all the clapping had died down, Byakuya yelled, "Who wrote those lines for me!"
"I did!" screamed Yoruichi. She stood up. "Bet ya can't catch me, little Bya-chan!" Byakuya growled and narrowed his eyes at the dark female. He would let Yoruichi feel his pain, having to act totally out of character on the stage. Damn woman, thought Byakuya angrily. He stomped off the stage and chased after her.
"And the next play will be…" Shunsui searched through his script. "Hansel and Gretel!"
A/N: (1) – sorry, no shikai or bankai in this fic
And yeah, I think Byakuya was a little out of character at the end. Well, it's more like a reference to his history with Yoruichi coz they played 'catch' a lot during the turn back the pendulum arc.
Lol, that was fun. I hope you enjoyed it and will give me a review! Thanks!