A/N: Okay, after a long wait, here's your update. Sorry for the long delay…my bad.
The very next day, everyone was up bright and early (Or about to pull an all-dayer in the vampires' cases) and at the California Zoo. Hansa handed her ticket to the teen at the booth and the boy simply stared at her. The werewolf growled at him and walked through the gate, cracking her neck as she did. Inside, Schrodinger was already waiting for everyone, a wide grin spread across his face. Seras and Alucard were waiting as well, and the latter looked rather guilty for sneaking in without paying.
Hansa could have cared less, and would have rather simply broken in and gotten through this entire thing for free. But alas, Integra made some of those present obey the law. And after everyone was in the zoo, Dok gathered up the large and abnormal group for an announcement. Whatever it was, if it was one of Dok's or the Major's schemes, it could not be any good for everyone else. The enigmatic Nazi doctor-scientist opened up his medical coat and displayed to the others a small fire extinguisher-like object tucked away in the left side of his coat. He grinned broadly.
"Now, I have prepared somezing zat vill be very interesting to use in zis kind of place," he said, a glint of madness shining from his eye. Or maybe that was just the sunlight glinting off of his enormous glasses? Who knew? Maybe it was both?
"Vhat is it Dok? Could zat be some new laughing gas to be tested?" Schrodinger asked hopefully. Hansa kneed him in the backside and shut him up before he could say anything else. There was no way she was going to let Dok spray the kid with any more of his 'laughing gas' from the lab. Hell, all that crap had been last time was a smoke machine filled with hashish smoke. And that had made Schrodinger sing Hosana in the Highest with a bottle of moonshine in one hand and spanking himself with the other. Hansa didn't know where Dok had smuggled the stuff from, but when she finally finished her investigation, the exporters would be dead. But for now, all she could do was listen.
"Now, I vill spray each of you in ze face vit zis formula, und it vill make you go to ze animals vit vich you are most akin to. Now, if you vould…" Everyone lined up and Dok immediately hosed them down with the strange gas. After a few moments, Hansa felt something strange welling up inside of her nose. She sniffed to make the feeling go away, and then she knitted her brow. What was this smell? She sniffed again and made an about-face. She suddenly recognized what this way, mostly because of her keen sense of smell. It was the smell of other wolves, a pack to be exact. She began to stroll in the direction of the scent's source, and very soon, the others began wandering off to go to their own animals.
Hansa took a long stroll, idly sniffing the air to track down the pack of arctic wolves here. And after passing through the nocturnal animals, where she saw Alucard and Dok going into, she found her wolves. They were in one of those big, open pens with no glass barrier and a huge wall surrounding it with a moat on the side of the wolves. Hansa put her elbows on the rail and her chin in her hands, a smiled beginning to form on her face. She whistled once, and all of the wolves immediately parked up, ears standing on end, noses pointed to the crowd. People started talking dozens pictures of the wolves, and Hansa whistled again.
This time, the wolves immediately turned their heads to her and Hansa flat out grinned with pride. One wolf lowered her head and put her paws over the end of her snout. Hansa was surprised that the matriarch was giving up this easily. But then again, Hansa was a werewolf, and probably able to rip apart this entire pack without any trouble whatsoever. Of course, being grown and raised in the zoo should have weakened the wild and protective nature of these wolves. But, if she couldn't get wild, natural wolves, these would have to do. Hansa stepped up on the railing and someone grabbed her hand. She saw that it was one of the zoo staff.
"Hey, get down from there, that's dangerous," he said Hansa broke his grip and jumped down into the wolf pen. She walked over to the nearest wolf and he growled lightly, a little confused probably. Besides, how could the scent of a matriarch be coming from a human? Hansa knelt down and growled back, causing the wolf to whimper and lay down. Hansa tilted her head to the side.
"I didn't want you to fear me," she said to him in the only language she figured he'd understand.
"What am I supposed to think? You have such a scent of authority and you growled, which means that you're angry at me," the wolf replied.
"I'm sorry. I just want to take the matriarch out for a long walk, alright?"
"Take…take her for a walk?" the wolf stammered.
"Yes indeed. Don't worry, she'll be back in no time," Hansa said. And with that, she walked over to the current matriarch, picked her up, and leapt out of the wolf pen. The crowd that had gathered immediately scattered and Hansa set her wolf down, realizing that the scent that had led her here was the very scent of this wolf. The matriarch looked up Hansa and whimpered.
"What are you going to do with me?" she asked worriedly. Hansa scratched behind her ear.
"Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you. Oh, what's your name?"
"Cindy," the wolf replied. Hansa's mood soured. Alright, Cindy was most definitely not a wolf's name.
"Well, your new name is…Felicie as of today. Your name means 'lucky' and you should be proud of that," Hansa huffed. The wolf nodded.
"Felicie…got it," the wolf replied. Hansa smirked and the radio she had been given this morning blared with Dok's annoying voice. It was a transmission about how they were to meet up at the aquatic animals section. Hansa and Felicie moved through the panicking crowd without another word, simply growling at someone who was too close. And it was much to Hansa's amusement, that the zoo authorities tried to stop them with tranquilizer guns, a firing line of them. The werewolf heaved a great sigh and cracked her knuckles. Felicie lowered herself into a leaping stance, but Hansa whistled sharply. Felicie stood still.
"I'll handle this. You just look pretty," Hansa said as she transformed into a gigantic white wolf. The zookeepers immediately broke rank and fled as fast as their feet would take them. Hansa smirked and changed back into her human form, licking away some unruly white fur that had managed not to disappear on her wrist. She and Felicie broke into a run and made their way to the aquatic section…after a few mishaps with the local prontopup vendors, mostly Felicie's fault anyhow. Eventually, the two met up with Seras and Integra, who had two strange animals.
"Hansa! Hey…your animal didn't change, you got a wolf," Seras pointed out.
"Of course, she's half wolf," Integra said. Hansa saw that Seras had a kangaroo with her and that Integra had a red elk. They waited at the section entrance for the others, which soon made their appearance. First was Dok, with a big owl on his shoulder. Seras laughed at him.
"He got an owl because they both have big hooters," she said giggling. Hansa rolled her eyes. Dok looked confused, massive glasses resembling the owl's huge eyes. Unfortunately, Dok had taken Seras' pun one step further and put glasses on the owl to protect its eyes from the sun. Next, Schrodinger and Alucard arrived at the same time, giving each other nasty looks. On Alucard's head, there was a vampire bat. Everyone present, including Integra, said the exact same thing.
"How surprising," was the unanimous, sarcastic remark. Alucard's grin faded and he shadow shifted over to Integra's side. Integra's red elk literally hopped away and the head of the Hellsing organization slapped Alucard in the back of the head, causing his grin to reemerge. Hansa looked at what Schrodinger was holding, and to no great surprise, found that he held a harmless house cat with golden fur. Seras giggled and made a cute and harmless remark that devastated the cat boy entirely. Soon afterwards, Jan, Luke, Yumiko, Heinkel, Anderson, Enrico, and Alhambra arrived as well.
They all entered the aquatic section with their animals and met up with Pip, Zorin, and the Major inside. As soon as everyone saw the Major's animal, they all burst into an enormous chorus of laughter and a fit of cacophony. The Major, with a scowl on his face, raised his hands repeatedly like he was telling them to raise the noise.
"Ja, laugh it up…assholes," he murmured. Behind the pudgy Nazi officer, there was literally laying at the bottom of the massive water tank, a manatee, better known as the 'sea cow' to everyone else. And after about three minutes, everyone had gotten out their laughs and giggles and they could move on to see what Pip and Zorin had. And when they got to Pip, very few of them were surprised to see him grinning about having a dolphin.
"Of course, Dolphins are the only other animals on earth that have sex for pleasure," Rip said, petting the panther that accompanied her. Its tail swished back and forth like a long centipede almost, and Alhambra's chameleon lashed out with it's tongue. The panther jumped into Rip's arms and she staggered back and forth to hold the beast. Alhambra stepped back to avoid the claws that swept just past his ear. The chameleon on his shoulder changed to the color of Alhambra's jacket and disappeared almost completely.
"Oh look! Zorin's got a…a fish?" Seras said, scratching her head as she stared at the strange fish before her. Zorin grunted.
"Oh, that's a Sheepshead Fish," Dok said with a leer. "It can change gender from female to male if it gets big enough," he finished.
"ZORIN CAN BE EIN MANN IF SHE GAINS VEIGHT?!" Schrodinger roared at the top of his lungs. Zorin swept her scythe across his neck and decapitated him, only to have the cat boy appear with his harmless kitty back at a safe distance. So, Hansa examined the rest of the group. Jan had a Boa Constrictor wrapped around his arms and running over his shoulders. The thing looked like it could eat him whole in three seconds flat! On the other hand, Luke had a mongoose in his hands, which was hissing and growling at Heinkel's Spitting Cobra. Yumiko had a cute, cuddly, albeit huge, panda serving as a chair for the schizophrenic nun. And last but not least, Enrico, whom had earlier boasted about being a grand ruler of the Catholic faith and said that he would have a great beast…had a black rat on his shoulder.
Before long, things began to take a turn for the worse as Heinkel and Luke got into an argument, which led to their animals getting into a full blown fight. Yumiko changed to Yumie and her panda started to attack everything in sight, and was only constrained by Jan's Boa. Meanwhile, Alucard's vampire bat scared the life out of Integra's elk and it kicked and whirled in an attempt to stop the little bloodsucker from leeching a meal. Anderson's hawk, while carrying the black rat, pecked and clawed at the bat and the elk both. Schrodinger's kitty, much like the cat boy, hid in the corner. Alhambra seemed to just disappear in a flurry of aces and wasn't seen for a great many hours after that.
The Major's manatee simply watched as Pip's dolphin went to look for another dolphin, and the sheepshead floated around aimlessly. Dok and his owl were simply trying not to get killed by the flurry of tails, claws, fangs, furry paws, horns, beaks, hooves, and saliva. And through all this, Hansa and Seras simply watched the chaos from the sidelines, their respective animals looking at each other in confusion. Hansa smirked.
"Glad we're not in that," she said.
"You and me both," Seras replied. They left the scene of chaos with their animals in tow, the two beasts looking back at the fight and then at each other. They both nodded.
"Quite a ruckus to be had at a zoo," Felicie commented.
"Good thing we got out before we got dragged into it," Halil replied, taking a few practice swings at the air. Felicie snapped her jaws at the emptiness. They both agreed that their masters were much smarter than everyone else for staying out of the fight. But, Seras, Hansa, Felicie, and Halil all mentally agreed that had they joined it, the fight would have been theirs, no questions asked.
Later that day, everyone was banned from every zoo on the planet…for life.