A/N: I don't own Naruto... I wish I did though. Deidara was with Hidan and Itachi when we left, flying to the base. In this chapter, Tobi (eep!) isn't introduced and I hint more at Sasori. Sasori is away though, so Hidan and Itachi tell him more about his soon to be partner in crime. Same, same, random idea= random story. At the end he meets Sasori… with a blistering result…
Deidara's POV... Art Is A Bang!
"Well, who am I meant to be partnered with, un? You told me about the whole partner concept, explain more on whom, un." I demanded. I wanted to know more.
"Well, I said something about Sasori before, right? He's the one who thinks art is everlasting. He'll be partnered with you, as Orochimaru recently defected. He's not too pleased about it. He's half puppet and can last forever. We have Konan's cousin at the moment. She's nine and a half. You're going to be partnered with her until Sasori gets back from his latest mission." Itachi explains the whole thing so that I can understand. For that, I am grateful. The Jashinist had attempted to explain his religion to me but I didn't understand a thing until Itachi translated from his swearing. "Sasori is half puppet and he's kind of strange… he hides in his room making new puppets and ignoring everyone. His last partner was psycho so we don't blame him."
Wow… I got an S-ranked criminal organisation around me and I'm partnered with a puppet!!! I am so sad… not! I love this place… maybe this mob will appreciate my art! Eh… maybe not. "So Sasori is a puppet, un? How did that happen, un?"
"I'm new too! Don't ask me! Then again, I'm the only person that can really speak in a language that you understand… I'm starting to wish I didn't kill everyone in my clan!" Itachi sighed, walking away from me and Hidan with a groan. Whoa, he's one fucked up kid, un.
"Point taken... *hic*. I am too fucking drunk *hic* to say anything *hic* right, fuck... *hic, hic*. Maybe I shouldn't have drunk all that sake... *hic* fuck..." Hidan had somehow drunk a whole bottle of sake on the hour flight to the lair. "I hate... *hic* fucking heights... *hic*." Hidan explained, his voice was so slurred that Deidara had to listen really hard to catch all of his words.
"Deidara? Is that the bomber who killed his parents? Whoa, how'd you catch him? I sent Kisame and Hidan before you came and his sister protected him like a mother does her son!" 'Leader-sama', as I'm meant to call him, was obviously elated at the prospect of having me as a part of their team. "Hello..." The man of shadows spoke with a tired, yet faintly excited, voice. "I'm Pein-sama, or Leader-sama, either, either. So, you are Deidara?"
"Yes, un. I'm Deidara-kun, un. Nice to meet you Pein-sama, un." I spoke quieter as a blue haired chick walked up behind Pein-sama and put her hands on his shoulders. Ahh... do I know her, un? "Hi, un. I'm Deidara."
"Konan. What's up with the 'un's'? They're annoying..." She spoke with a slight accent, flowing the words together quickly; again, I was trying hard to understand these guys. "Hello? I asked you a question."
"Sorry... I have always said it, un. It's not even a family thing, un. I hate it too, un." The girl threw her hands up in exasperation, annoyed.
"Why are you here, baka? I didn't think we recruited babies into the Akatsuki? Is that a recent improvement, Pein? We might have to talk about that." Konan was obviously someone I'd have to avoid. Wait for it, wait for it. She'll diss my hair too. It's long, so nah duh... "I thought I was supposed to be the only girl? You told Hidan not to bring his little girlfriends' home, didn't you?" Ah ha, I knew it!
"Konan! That was way rude! This is Deidara, from Iwa... the one who blew up his Dad." Pein was laughing as Konan rolled her eyes and stormed off. "Don't worry about her, she's PMSing. She'll get over it, and she'll apologize for being a bitch."
"I HEARD THAT!" The woman screeched from down the hall. "THAT WAS SO SEXIST! I HATE NEW PEOPLE! THEY ALWAYS FUCK THINGS UP!"
"Ouch... that hurt." Itachi murmured from behind Pein. "I didn't know she hated me that much."
What an amazing way to start my time as part of the Akatsuki. It's not my favourite way to start a friendship, PMSing and bitching way actually pretty low on my list of insults, but it hurt when she hadn't spoken to me for a whole month after I joined the Akatsuki. I blew crap up and killed a few hundred people before I even met my new senpai... Sasori had a huge mission. He had to find the sand demon, Shakaku, and kill it. As if! I thought one night. Sasori would be lucky if he comes back alive after dealing with Gaara! It was true; I had fought the demon boy once. I was his friend but I still feared the boy, like any normal person. I had had to fight him after I killed my parents. We were enemies then, and since that fight we'd become alright friends. What would he say if he saw me now, with my big Akatsuki cloak with the red clouds and high collar? Would he kill me? Probably. God, I miss my old life. Even some random guy that works for Zetsu, a cannibal plant dude, steers clear of me, probably on Zetsu's orders though. His name was Tobi; he's a masked ninja who is way, way too bubbly for his own good.
"Fucking Sasori is back." Hidan came into my room, ignoring my clay work as he dodged the chairs and bed Konan's cousin, Tamara, had kicked up after I called Konan a bitch. "You stirred up fucking Tamara again, didn't you? Fuckwit!"
I grinned and thought over what he said. "Huh, Sasori's back, un? Does he know about me yet, un?" I was nervous about meeting my new senpai. "Does he, un?"
"Uh... I don't think so, fuckwit. Let him get fucking debriefed first. Uh... and I'd clean up this fucking room before he comes... oh shit."
A redhead that looked a lot like Gaara stormed in, the only major difference in the eyes. Gaara's eyes were an aqua colour that shone slightly in the sun, but Sasori's eyes were a coppery colour that looked at me with a burning hatred. He glanced around the room and back at me.
"What the fuck have you done to my room, brat? I wanted to sleep tonight, not fricking clean!" The redhead looked like he was about to explode at me. "Why am I getting paired up with a girl like this guy?" I looked at the boy in shock. Why did all of these people hate me???
"It wasn't me, un! Why the heck do all you motherfuckers fucking hate me, un? I'm fucking sick of it, un!" I saw the anger in the boy's face soften as I spoke but as soon as I called him a motherfucker he hardened up again.
"I ain't no fucking motherfucker, you cheap whore! I hate you because you fucking messed up my fucking room! Why the fuck else would I fucking hate you! Fuck!" Sasori was really annoyed, annoyed like Shakaku at the smell of blood he can't have.
"Sasori... don't you fucking dare!" I saw the kunai in his hand and ducked, but the weapon hit me in the shoulder, rather than my heart, where the puppet was aiming. He pinned me to the ground, using the chakra strings that Itachi warned me about. "Sasori! He's just a fucking twerp, don't fucking kill him! It's a waste of fucking chakra!" Hidan had stuck up for me by insulting me. How does that work?
That got me. I was part of this fucking organisation too. I put the lump of clay I had been forming into a griffon on my desk and walked out. As I shut the door I heard Sasori sigh, his tone annoyed as he yelled at Hidan. Too bad that he'd be shut up for a while. I grinned as I got up to the roof. This was going to get me killed but for the hell of it I'd do it. Bye Sasori.
"Art is a bang... that's for sure." I made the tiger seal hand-sign and grinned. "Katsu! Explode my darling griffon. Too bad I had to waste you on Sasori... I was going to kill Kana with it. A sister's love, puh-lease, un! As if!" I laughed evilly as the ground rumbled with the explosion under my feet.
"Deidara!" Leader-sama's voice echoed through the lair as I laughed. "Get in here!"
The leader stood behind his desk, his eyes flashing with anger. Sasori and Hidan were coughing and covered in scorches from my blast. Sasori was glaring at me with hatred filled eyes and Hidan looked at me with eyes filled with betrayal.
"Why the hell did you blow up your room?! It's insanity! Were you trying to kill Sasori and Hidan?" I grinned at Pein-sama's question. "Well?"
"No, not Hidan, un. Sasori yelled at me for no fucking reason and I'm sick of being treated like a fricking air waster, un! I was treated like that back home; that was why I blew up my fucking family, yeah! I'm fucking sick of it, un."
Sasori's expression didn't soften, but I didn't expect it to. "Well, when I come home to find a fucking stranger in my fucking room and the room fucking demolished, I tend to get angry!" I rolled my eyes as Sasori whined about the room... again.
"Uh... that wasn't Deidara..." I heard Tamara come in and I hissed. The bitch left me to deal with my new senpai, what did you expect? "That was me, Sasori. I got annoyed at the guy and destroyed the room, knowing you'd be back soon and he'd just turn to his art, as usual." I groaned; everyone hated my art; that was obvious. "Also, my sister in Kohona called and said that Star, my old group, was back together, and we are going to be rocking the city once more. I'm asking for leave, whether you want to wipe my memories or not." I looked at the brunette and her blue eyes glinted as she smirked.
"Go ahead; I don't need to wipe all the memories. You've been here plenty of times." Tamara cheered and ran out of the room. "Back onto the topic of blowing up your room... why?"
"Art is a bang... I thought that was obvious, un." I looked at the puppet man with eyes filled with self-content. "I've come to rely on explosions, un. That's why Kana hated the things, un."
"What the hell is up with the un's? I'm fucking sick of it!" Sasori yelled, stalking out of the room. "I am going to clean up my room and get ready from later. Reassign me please Leader-sama."
"Art is a bang. You better remember that, un!" I called out to the angry puppet. "Art is a real blast!"