I planned on waiting for my laptop before continuing, but that's taking longer than I expected so I'll just continuing borrowing my mom's…
--
"Lil-Lilly…" He stuttered.
I finally found the strength to throw my hands to my face and bolted to the kitchen. I opened the fridge and pretended to look for something as I took the time to recollect. I eventually took out a water bottle and turned around to see he'd followed me and was sitting on the island.
He stared at me with no expression on his face, "You okay?" As if my reaction was that extraordinary.
I ripped off the wrapping around the bottle. "I just don't get why you didn't tell me right away…" I knew the true reason that had brought tears to my eyes, and I wondered if he had any idea.
"I know I should have… and I tried to but"—
"Lies!" I yelled, pounding the bottle on the counter. "Don't say you tried to tell me because you didn't! For the last two weeks I've been trying to get you to tell me something about my life, anything, and you constantly refused to. So don't try to sell me that crap about"—
"Okay, okay fine!" He looked up at me and I let myself relax as I stared back at him. He sighed, "Fine, I'll tell you. But Lils, you've got to understand, some things… maybe they're just worth forgetting. Maybe it's best if"—
"Would you just tell me?!" I screeched. I loved how we wouldn't let each other finish any statement. Again, some things just never change.
"Tell you what? That you had a boyfriend too?" He blurted angrily.
Me? Boyfriend? Had? I opened my mouth but nothing came out.
"Jason Lee Parker," he continued but he's eyes were now tilted upwards the way you do when you're remembering. "Graduated last year. Very… tall," he shrugged.
I scrunched my eyebrows. Tall? That was the best he could come up with? "Can you tell me more about him..?"
He exhaled and shrugged again. I could tell he really didn't care about this boyfriend of mine. "You broke up with him."
I looked down; that wasn't exactly the information I was fetching for but I decided to go with it. "…because he was graduating?"
He abruptly shifted his eyes to look directly into mine. It scared me a bit for they depicted sorrow, pain, or maybe even regret? I wasn't sure, but I knew it couldn't be too good. Without looking away—something he usually did while speaking nowadays—he mumbled, "Sure."
I narrowed my eyes, "I don't believe you."
He looked down, "I know. But that's all you need to know."
My mouth flew open. "Oh really? And who are you to tell me what I need to know or not?! Isn't that for me to decide!" He was really starting to get on my nerves with the way he controlled my memory.
"Lils, if you knew"—
I shook my hand and held up my hand to cut him off. "No, you know what let me ask you something. Do I even like Mya? Or is that something else you're just deciding for me?"
He ran his hands through his hair, frustrated. "Well, don't you like her now?"
"Because I didn't know she was your girlfriend!" I yelled before thinking twice about it. I bit my lip, wondering if he'd realized my jealousy. But he continued our fight as if that was expected of me.
"See, that's why I didn't want to tell you!"
"Lying to me isn't going to help me any! Why are you even dating her, because she looks like you? Or has double initials like you? If you like her because you think she's like you, well she's not! You may have cut and dyed your hair to look like her, but you're still the same freakin' Oliver I knew. And there's nothing you can change about that! I just wish you could see it too."
I knew my eyes were teary again as he stared at me, and I wish I could dramatically walk out but this was my house so I waited for him to move. As much as I wanted him gone, I couldn't get myself to tell him to leave, so we just stood/sat there staring. I wasn't sure whether he was stunned I'd burst like that or if that was normal of me, in fact I couldn't tell what he was thinking at all.
"Oliver, you're going to need to say something," I cracked.
His hand forcefully held his dark bangs out of his eyes. "You've… you've never told me that."
"What do you mean?"
He took in a deep breath and took his time to let it out. "You hate Mya." I rolled my eyes; I kind of had that figured out. Though I somewhat felt bad because I couldn't really muster any hate for her at the moment. I didn't think she was the right girl for him, but she'd mostly been friendly to me so I couldn't hate her. "You've just never told me why. At least not like that."
I raised my eyebrows. I've always been an outspoken person; I don't know why I would hold myself back from pointing out the stupidity in trying to look like his girlfriend. "Are we... are we no longer friends because of her?"
He shook his head, and when I was about to sigh with relief he added, "No, not because of her."
And my sigh caught midway in my throat. He was right; I didn't want to know anything else. I didn't know what worse than his girlfriend could break our once indestructible bond.
"I'm—I'm getting tired," I whimpered underneath held back tears. I just made my way to my room, and left him to leave or keep sitting there for all I cared.
--
"Someone's at the door!" I yelled. My mom didn't answer so I figured she was sleeping. I was sleeping too, in fact, but the doorbell woke me up. I carefully made my way downstairs hoping not trip—one head injury at a time please.
"Hey Lils." The dark figure behind the door said once I opened it.
"Hey…" I shivered a bit at the cool breeze that made its way past him.
He noticed this and sped up his visit. "Here," he handed me a CD case. "Just listen to it. Hopefully it'll… explain. At least a bit. See ya." And then left.
I blinked a few times, and then closed the door before freezing to death. I figured I might as well listen to it considering I wouldn't be able to fall asleep with all my curiosity. I looked over the case 'Songs depicting the life and times of Lilly Truscott & Oliver Oken' was written in the center with Sharpie. I quietly laughed to myself, and made a note to self to convince Oliver not to go in the CD-name writing business. I opened and looked over the list of songs. Most of them I didn't recognize for they'd come out within the last five years.
I popped the CD into my laptop and planned to carefully listen to each of them for their meaning.
We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes and the flashback starts
Me standing there on the balcony in the summer air…
The first song sounded country/pop-ish. Not something Oliver would listen to but I immediately liked it. Not only for the song, but it didn't take a rocket scientist to identify it as a love song. I looked at the list, it read '1. Love Story – Taylor Swift'. The title helped too.
By the time it ended for the 7th time it was 2am. I stopped the CD. I'd listened to the song in every way possible; I didn't know what it could mean. Well, I knew what it could mean, but was that what he wanted to say or was I off again?
AN…
1. Love Story – Taylor Swift
2. Crush – David Archuleta
3. These Are the Moments – Edwin McCain
4. Love Remains the Same – The Cure
5. Don't Speak – No Doubt
6. Hope It Gives You Hell – All American Rejects
7. Hate That I Love You – Ne-yo & Rihanna
9. Mr. Brightside – The Killers
Bonus Track: Careless Whisper – Seether
--
Wow, I wrote that all in one sitting! I know it's shorter than the others... but it was supposed to be. I put the all the titles in the CD at the end for your sake. Any guesses about what they each represent? (Hint: They're in chronological order of.. something ;) ) xoxCamy