A Wistful Love

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters in this story. They all belong to Tamora Pierce.

Chapter 5

Dazed Thoughts and Dresses

Kel ate breakfast slowly. Her mind was still spinning from her rude awakening in the meadow. Just thinking about it made her cheeks heat. Kel knew she'd made a fool of herself, her tongue tripping over itself, but when the intense moment between her and Dom had been broken, her mind had had trouble recovering. It had been like a dream; waking to the feel of Dom's weight on her, his burning blue gaze staring into her own. Kel remembered the warmth of his breath on her face and the gentle touch of his thumb as he'd stroked her cheek. It had been too ridiculous to be real. Dom didn't like her. He was only her friend.

Frustrated, her mind going in circles, Kel stared down at her plate. After his explanation, Dom had taken care of Bayfire, then walked with her to the mess hall. Though his smile had been carefree, there had been a certain awkwardness between them that Kel had never experienced before. Dom had refused to meet her eyes and as soon as they'd entered the mess, he'd made some excuse about reports to write. The whole affair had been thoroughly confusing. Reiterating to herself that he was a busy man, Kel tried to turn her thoughts elsewhere. When her head refused to cooperate, she gave up on her meal and went in search of Neal.

She found him in the suite of rooms he shared with Yuki, squinting at the fine script on a scroll. As she entered the room, he glanced up a with a absent-minded smile before returning his gaze to the parchment.

"Good morning, Kel. I hear you decided to sleep under the stars last night. Is this going to become a habit or was it just impulse?"

Kel's eyes narrowed. "And where did you hear that, Neal?"

He chuckled, his eyes still glued to the scroll in front of him. "A certain cousin of mine dropped by not a quarter of an hour ago. He supposedly found you out there and mistook you for dead before realizing you were just asleep. He did mention that he accidentally fell on top of you. Actually, that's what I want to know more about."

Setting aside his work, Neal leaned back in his chair and centered all of his attention on Kel.

"How does one 'accidentally' fall on you? When I asked Dom, he suddenly remembered that Lord Raoul had been looking for him. I don't suppose you have any ideas?"

Kel fought back surprise. Dom had told Neal already? What about his reports? And why had he not explained that he'd simply lost his balance, when he'd been leaning over her? Her face, still Yamani smooth, Kel shrugged and replied in her blandest voice.

"I moved in my sleep and he fell. It's simple really."

Neal raised a single brow. "Simple? I doubt anything involving the two of you could be simple."

Kel glared at him suspiciously. "And what does that mean?"

Neal laughed and shook his head. "Nothing, Kel. It means nothing. I'm just letting my tongue run away with me as usual."

At that moment, they were interrupted by Yuki. As the plump Yamani entered the room, Neal hurried over to greet his wife. Knowing she'd have to question Neal later on about his cryptic statement, Kel turned to watch the couple embrace.

Yuki's eyes were sparkling and she seemed happy. It appeared that the effects of yesterday's ride were still with her. She turned to Kel after reassuring Neal that she was feeling ok.

"Kel! Good Morning! I was just visiting Shinko. She's having some new dresses made for the Midsummer Ball and wanted my opinion on some of Lalasa's designs. They look so beautiful. There's even one for me that doesn't make me look like an a very large cow."

Neal protested his wife's comment. "You look beautiful! What are you talking about?"

Yuki laughed good-naturedly, then continued. "There's one for you too Kel. The design fits you perfectly. Shinko wants you to look over it before Lalasa starts to make them. I know you'll love it though."

Kel sighed in resignation. "I suppose I'll visit her now then. Is Lalasa still with her?"

Yuki nodded. "When I left, they were still talking about it. She's going to commission several for the Yamani ladies."

Kel started toward the door. "I'm going to go see Shinko and Lalasa now."

She paused and gazed back over her shoulder. "And Neal? Don't think I'm finished with you just yet. You still have to explain your last statement.

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Kel knocked on Shinko's door and at her "Come in!", entered cautiously. Lalasa and 'Cricket', as Kel used to call her as a child, were talking over several designs lying out on a desk. Both women were talking animatedly about stitches, material, and the hundreds of other things associated with a the making of dresses. At the sight of Kel, they greeted her. Lalasa smiled and hurried over to her. "My lady! You have to see the design I came up with. I think it'll look wonderful on you!"

Kel winced. "It doesn't have miles and miles of flounces does it? I really hate flounces."

Lalasa sighed and gave her a stern look. "You know I would never do that to you."

Kel laughed. "I suppose so. All right, then. I'm ready to see it."

Happily, Lalasa led her over to the scattered papers on the desk. Shuffling through a few of them, she finally pulled one out. With a flourish, she set it in front of Kel. Standing back with Shinko, she anxiously awaited Kel's opinion.

Kel stared down at the deftly drawn design. It was simple and elegant. The bodice was was cut in a V-neck shape, that dipped moderately low. The sleeves were long, but were fluted outward so that they would fall elegantly at her wrists. The the dress itself fell to her ankles in a waterfall of material that was made of of several lengths of cloth. Small embroidered leaves were sketched at the hems, sleeves and bodice. The final effect was dazzling, but simple. It would accentuate Kel's figure perfectly, rather than make her look thick-waisted and unfeminine. Kel continued to study the design as she asked Lalasa the color.

Hesitantly, her former maid answered. "The dress will be a hazel green to match your eyes. The embroidery will be done in gold."

Still awed by the design, Kel lifted her gaze and smiled. "It's wonderful Lalasa. You've really outdone yourself this time."

Lalasa pressed her hands to her mouth. "Really? You like it? You're not just trying to appease me?"

Kel grinned. "No. I really like it. It's exactly the kind of dress I would like to wear."

Lalasa laughed delightedly. "I'm going to be sewing yours myself. I'm so happy that you approve of my design."

Shinko smiled at the dressmaker. "How could she not? It's a masterpiece!" Turning she drew Kel over to a chair. "I want to show some of the other dresses Lalasa had in mind for me and Yuki. And see this one over here? That will be the Queen's. Isn't it exquisite!"

Kel obediently examined the designs, resigned to a morning filled with talk of ribbons and cloth. She knew that it would only be a matter of time before she could escape.

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Dom ran a frustrated hand through his dark hair and paced the length of his room. He couldn't stop thinking about Kel. Whenever he tried to distract his mind with other things, it would inadvertently circle back to her. His blunder in the meadow kept running through his head. Over and over he would agonize over his foolish excuse for falling on her. Had she bought it? Did she accept that nothing had happened? Surely she'd seen the telling look in his eyes when they'd locked gazes? And he'd touched her. The moment his body had pressed against hers his mind had gone blank and the only thing he could think about was how beautiful she looked. If it hadn't been for Bayfire, he would have kissed her. Then where would he be? His friendship with Kel would be ruined and she'd hate him. That's what. And then there was Neal. Feeling dazed and needing to talk to someone, he'd gone to his cousin. Before he could think about what he was doing he blurted out that he'd found Kel in the meadow and that he'd fallen her. When Neal's gaze had sharpened with interest and he'd started to question, Dom had hastily made an excuse and left.

Now he stood staring out the window of his quarters at a loss of what to do. For years he'd hidden his growing love for Kel. He'd tried to find someone else to replace her, but he found himself turning away each lady he came across when they fell short of Kel's standards. They didn't have Kel's quiet strength and honor. They didn't have her patience and dry sense of humor. It was pathetic really. Domitan of Masbolle lovesick over the Lady Knight. Had she ever shown a sign of returning his feelings? No. He'd looked for it, hoping to see some spark. But each time she'd hide behind that god's cursed mask of hers. Even when he'd flirted with her, she shook it off. She just didn't see him a more than a friend. Heartsick, Dom stared blindly out his window and asked the Gods if he was meant to suffer in silence.

Author's Note: Hey everyone! I know I took forever to update and I'm really sorry. Recently I've had tons of work to do and I kept pushing it back. Hopefully the next post will be sooner. I hope this chapter is ok. Please Review! –Lupus17