A/N: Another chapter! This one I typed in only a few hours as well, but not in the early morning. Rather, it was typed late afternoon and early evening the same day I posted "Stop". I had a streak, that's all. Disclaimer is in the first chapter.
Sometimes, there were moments when one just had to pause to take everything in. To get past the incredulous feeling and jubilance building up inside one's body, to be sure to let all of the senses take everything in. To feel, to see, to taste, to hear, to smell…take everything in, and the world takes one in. One did not have to change; the world would accept one for their unadulterated self. These moments were rather rare for even the richest, or the most blessed of all. When they came, even the privileged had to pause and take everything in.
The scared, the fearful, even they had their moments. However, these moments seemed even rarer to them because they would instinctively close up like a clam and not let anyone in. No one was allowed to see their true selves, because they felt self-conscious, or felt that the truth was too great for anyone but themselves to bear. Doing this dulled their senses, numbed their nerves so they couldn't feel, or taste, or hear very well. They could only smell and see properly, and even then, it was still slightly skewed. Eyes could trick, and so could noses. It wasn't nearly enough to satisfy their needs. It was a pitiful course of life for them, but as long as they got by and lived to a ripe old age, it was still okay. None rose against their condemned lifestyle, because although saddening, it was safe. Nice and neat and safe.
Emma Pillsbury fell into this category of the hopeless and damned. She didn't think of herself as beautiful, lived in a sham love life until the past Saturday, and had great feelings for a married man all the while…not to mention her debilitating germ phobia that bordered on obsessive-compulsive disorder.
So as she emailed her resignation to Principal Figgins, tears dyed with eyeliner streaming down her face, she couldn't help but have a nagging feeling within her that something wasn't right about this, that she was running away from yet another problem. She was being cowardly, as per usual with women of her character. But for the moment, she was perfectly fine with running away.
It hadn't dawned on her that she had been running ever since her brother pushed her into the run-off lagoon at the dairy farm. It was running from germs at first. Then it was running from her true feelings by letting herself be regulated to the bottom of her high school's caste system. A lack of self-confidence and esteem led to a lost bid for an out-of-state university, so she ran for Ohio State University. It was homesickness that literally made her sick and vomit (which, truthfully, was the blackest moment of her life, even blacker than breaking school rules for her secret Prince Charming) which led her back to Lima instead of leaving to another state to enroll in graduate school. For years, it was running, running, running. And if she could run again, she would sprint.
It had taken only around a half-hour to pack her things. There was the pure, clean, white orchid from her first date with Ken Tanaka at Tulip-Palooza, the pamphlets, the pencils and pens and paper all packed into an open green and white box that had a neat label with her name and "Office Supplies" tacked underneath in two parallel lines. After making sure she hadn't forgotten a single item, she took a mental picture of her former office. She only sighed as she shrugged on her green wool soldier coat and fixed her white beret neatly, yet still askew on her head. For that, neat was considered askew. The black phone was school property, and was the only thing left on the wooden desk. With much will-power, she forced herself to pick up the green box and leave the office, which seemed like a glass box on the outside. It wasn't running, she managed to convince herself, but healing. She had to heal her damaged psyche without any help, to prove she had a shred of independence left in the wake of her own doings.
During her silent parade and march through the hallways, she couldn't help but have a romantic notion within her. She hoped that Prince Charming would chase her, stop her, sweep her into a passionate kiss. It would be silent expect for their ragged breathing after he had sprinted for her, drank her in slowly, and gave her a powerful, yet chaste kiss with no disgusting tongue slipping in her mouth…although, since it was Will she was daydreaming about—
She stopped in the middle of the hallway, frozen mid-step. That thought had to be banished from her mind—and fast—or it would eat her alive. Then she'd actually want to go back to Figgins and revoke her resignation. And that would be a challenge within itself.
It was so dead silent in the hallway that she could even hear a pin drop. But no pin dropped; rather, there was quiet breathing, and a sigh of relief. It echoed, and she turned her head to the left to see who it was. To her inner surprise and shock, it was him. Will. And he was…no…it couldn't be…but it seemed real, so she turned to him from afar, holding her box, surprise quite possibly on her dour face. She wasn't dreaming now, because if she were, it meant the resignation had never been sent, and she distinctly remembered feeling the hot tears on her face, burning here eyes on that Saturday.
He had invaded her personal bubble, but it didn't really seem to matter at the moment; she was too frozen with a mix of anticipation, fear, dread, joy, a strange mix of feelings as she turned to face him, immediately attracted to him. He took the box from her hands and carefully set it down to her right, his left. And there was this look—she couldn't explain it—but it looked like he was strengthening himself for some sort of strenuous exercise, or a tension-filled moment. Did he want to ask her something? Why do you have to leave? Why can't you stay? Some romantic question? But all she could distinctly feel at that moment was how great it felt to no longer be holding that box of memories, some good, but most bad.
Her voice died in her throat as she mouthed 'what?', only to find that his finger was hovering in front of her lips, but not touching them, just the way she'd prefer it. As his finger disappeared, she looked up into those deep brown pools, and before she knew it, she distinctly felt as though something had been injected into her. What was it that made her feel those soft lips, taste a hint of chocolate chip cookie and a glass of milk, hear him inhale through his nose as though he were smelling her lotion or variety of scented hair products, smell a dying out cologne? Her eyes were closed, and in her mind's eye, she could see herself whispering, kiss him back.
Kiss him back. And she steadied herself and slowly put her hands on each of his biceps ('they're this strong?' she wondered) and she managed to kiss back and take in more of the feelings, the tastes, the senses of this moment.
And after a few seconds, when she needed air and pulled away slowly against her will, she looked into his eyes, questioning and even a little bit guilty, and realized what made her take in all of the senses once again: love. Unconditional love, pure love, jubilant, exploding love. And it made her let a cross between a laugh and a sigh escape from her smiling lips. To her great inner delight, relief overcame his expression, and he smiled too.
"Will—"
"Don't leave." He whispered softly. "Please."
And in those eyes, she couldn't find it in herself to quite refuse, even though she should, and even though she should be realizing the horror of this situation. It still hadn't hit her that he had kissed her while still married to Terri, and even with all her evilness, she didn't deserve it. But then again, plenty of couples date while in the middle of a divorce, so…
"Emma, I have to get back to the kids."
That brought her back down to Earth. "We…we need to talk about this later." And before she could stop herself, the final words were out of her mouth, "At my apartment?"
"Alright then." He smiled. "I don't know where you live, so uh…wait for me?" She nodded, and he picked up the box and placed it back in her arms. Like a real gentleman.
Now she had to go to Figgins and try to change his mind. She couldn't bear to see Will heartbroken, not now, not after what he just…did.
She found the principal still at his desk, head in his hands, weary from the day. After the receptionist let her into the office, she took a seat in one of the chairs. "Principal Figgins…I've decided to stay at the school as the guidance counselor."
He seemed to perk up instantly. "Really?" He gave a laugh of relief. "That's great! We don't have to spend so much time finding a replacement, losing money…"
She tried to make a getaway from his ramblings of joy, and as she stood up, she was stopped. "Miss Pillsbury, before you put your things back, I must ask…why have you decided to stay?"
"Well…" She clapped her hands together and looked off to the side, searching for an answer. After a few seconds, her eyes lit up with realization. "I decided that it was time to stop running away." They gave each other a smile, and after standard exchanges of calm thanks, she made her way back to her office and began unpacking her things again.
In the office, it felt more like her first day, starting anew. The office no longer looked like a glass box, but a clean and clear home. She didn't feel as though she were being put on display for the world to laugh at, but the world to admire. It would be a new chance to make great and fun memories, above all.
And the one thing the two moments in time had in common besides unpacking items from a green box?
She had a burst of happiness from meeting a great man to help her along.
A/N: I was pretty much listening to "So Close" by Jon McLaughlin while typing, so I decided to do a bit of an unconventional break and make everything happy, because I'm fairly sure this is how it'll go down in the writing room with Ryan Murphy and crew. I mean, at "Mash-Up" I would've been betting on there not being a kiss in the finale, and I was wrong. But there's a final chapter, and who knows what will happen there? You won't know without the next chapter, which I have somewhat planned. Reviews are highly appreciated!
