AN: Alright here it is the nest chapter. Thanks to all who reviewed and please keep those comments coming. Feedback helps the writer a) get fired up to write new chapters and b) makes me feel loved, awwww. So again thanks to all you lovely reviewers.

beautiful dreamere – Glad you liked the tofurkey and Kirk should NEVER cook any sort of holiday meal…ever, dragonwitch250 – I know, I feel soo back for McCoy, I'm amazed he hasn't killed Kirk yet, Selene the Slytherin – normally I don't showcase my Jew-pride but hellz yeah. I find it so funny how many people in the original cast were Jewish, XtinaW – Yeah Spock and games seems to be a no-no…poor Uhura, Caitiri – Kirk's interest in the tofurkey is actually based on my friend obsession with them, I just think Kirk would totally be like that in the kitchen, uki200 – I'm glad you found this chapter especially funny. I love how even Spock listens in to other peoples conversations lol, Port-of-Seas – Kirk should seriously be banned from Kitchen Stadium at this point and yeah, Christine can do way better than Roger IMO, Ohtar Vicky – I Spy is totally illogical! Oh Spock, that's why we love you, Psychodahlia – Passover is to me a holiday very suited for Trek, the large gathers, the food disasters, I find it ripe with inspiration, justjustice – Well this update wasn't as soon as the others but hey, I got it done. Hope you enjoy this next chapter, XUrMomX – Drunk Spock is on the way don't worry. This chapter actually paves the way for some of that.

Disclaimer: Not mine, Roddenberry's.

"There's a bubble on the side…what would happen if I…" As Kirk trailed, McCoy felt a familiar dread fill him. His eyes shot up just in time to see Kirk about to plunge a knife into a very large bubble on the side of the tofurkey.

"Jim, don't!"

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Suddenly, the room was filled with flying chucks of tofurkey. It took at least 5 minutes for the fake-meat and gravy to clear the air. When the dust finally settled, Kirk gave a small cough, "That could've been worse"

The second the words left his mouth, McCoy smacked him upside the head.

Kirk rubbed the spot gingerly as the two surveyed the kitchen (aka ground zero as McCoy called it). Gravy and faux-turkey juice covered large patches of the floor while smoking bits of tofu clung to the walls and cabinets.

Amazed at the destructive power a fake-bird had, Kirk let out a low whistle. "Huh, who would've thought all this came from that" He said as he poked whatever remained of the tofurkey.

"Who would've though all this came from you" McCoy said in aggravation.

"Me?" Kirk asked in innocent confusion, "What did I do?"

McCoy fought every instinct in his body not to strangle Kirk where he stood. Instead, the doctor took 3 deep breaths before addressing his Captain through clenched teeth.

"Nevermind" He said slowly emphasizing every syllable, "Just…clean…this…up"

Kirk looked around the room again. Half of it looked like the apocalypse had just hit, granted it was his designated side, but still. Jim Kirk didn't clean.

"You want me to clean up all of this?"

McCoy nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

"All of it?!"

McCoy nodded, again.

"All?...Seriously?"

"For the love of God Jim, just clean this up!"

"Bones, this'll take forever"

McCoy almost snapped his slotted spoon in half, "Than you better get started…now"

Kirk sighed before starting off towards the broom closet in search of a mop, or vacuum, or whatever it was you used to clean up exploded tofurkey. Once Kirk was out of sight and safely rummaging through cleaning supplies, McCoy let out a tired sigh. He knew Jim wasn't trying to be a pain in the ass; he simply had a natural gift for it.

Reveling in the newly found silence, McCoy surveyed the room again. Luckily, the mess had only covered under a half of the room. Really, it wouldn't take that long to clean and while Kirk was cleaning McCoy could finish the cooking in peace. Maybe the exploding meal wasn't so terrible after all. Besides, anything that kept Kirk occupied was immediacy deemed a godsend as far as McCoy was concerned.

"Hey Bones" Kirk called from the broom closet, "Where do we keep the-"

CRASH

And just like that Kirk had managed get himself into trouble….again. McCoy rolled his eyes as the clamor died down, and a very unhappy Kirk emerged. His shirt was covered in dirty water with a few splotches of tofurkey gravy running down the front.

"I fell…" He stated dumbly.

McCoy gave him a look that clearly said, "I know, I heard"

"I need a new shirt"

McCoy again stared, remaining speechless.

"I'm gonna change and then I'll cleanup"

McCoy raised an eyebrow in annoyance. It wasn't out of the realm of possibility for Kirk to "go off to change" and conveniently never return to clean up his stupid fake-bird mess.

"I'll come back" Kirk said defensibly, "I promise. Scouts honor"

With that Kirk left the kitchen and headed off to his room, possibly never to be seen from again.

"Scouts honor huh?" McCoy repeated as he mixed festive bowl 3, "Too bad you're not a scout, Jim"

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"Christine baby, I love you"

"Oh Roger. I think, I love you to"

"So we're cool. We're back together"

"Yeah, I really like you Roger"

"Christine you mean everything to me"

"Well…that's not exactly truth now is it?"

"What's that suppose to mean"

"You cheated on me! If you really cared"

"So now I don't care?!"

"God Roger you're such an ass! I don't what I was thinking!"

The argument raged on this fashion for what felt like an eternity, but Uhura and Spock had long given up attempting to listen. Uhura, who was growing increasingly bored, was very focused on finding a way to alleviate her boredom.

"Truth or dare?" She asked, eyes trained on Spock's subtly confused face.

The Vulcan raised an eyebrow as he'd done every time she'd suggested a game he did not see value in, "Truth or dare is not a logical choice of game. As a Vulcan I can must always tell the truth and as such-"

Uhura cut him off by gently pressing her finger against his lips, "Okay okay. Not truth or dare…Never have I ever?"

"I am not familiar with the game" He mumbled as her finger remained on his lips.

"Normally it's a drinking game but-"

"If it as a game that involves alcohol then I am unable to play. It would be unfair as Vulcan's are not affected as easily as humans"

Now Uhura raised an eyebrow. This was news to her, and she considered herself very well versed in alien cultures.

"You can't get drunk?" She asked in amusement.

"Intoxication can be caused by many substances. Alcohol is not one of those substances" He responded, enjoying her excitement at the topic.

"So what kinds of substances do affect you?" A mischievous grin settling in on her features.

"It would be unwise for me to divulge such information"

Uhura's grin quickly changed to a pout, "I will tickle it out of you if I have to"

"Vulcan's are not ticklish"

"And you're not all-Vulcan"

Spock quickly weighed his options before deciding now was NOT the time to find out if he was in fact ticklish. He cleared his throat uncomfortably before speaking, "Vulcan's tend to had a particular…limitation for ingesting chocolate"

"Chocolate?" She asked giggling, "As in Hershey and Nestle?"

Spock nodded, seriousness plastered to his features.

"Really?"

"As I mentioned earlier, it is impossible for a Vulcan to lie-"

Again Spock was cut off as Uhura leaned in and kissed him gently. As she attempted to scoot closer to him, and deepen the kiss, Uhura felt her something under her hand. She pulled away and looked under her palm to find a discarded deck of playing cards.

"Cards" She whispered, her eyes lighting up, "This is it! Let's play a card game! How about war?"

"The title alone promotes violent behavior"

"Old Maid?"

"I am unfamiliar with this game"

"Go Fish?"

Spock grinned, "I would very much enjoy that"

Uhura felt her own smile widen as she dealt out a hand.

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Kirk wandered down the hallway as slowly as possible. While he really did want to get out of his wet and dirty shirt, he really didn't want to go back and clean the kitchen. The whole point of being a Captain was so that other people could do the cleaning and cooking for you.

Unfortunately for Kirk his trip down the hallway wasn't as long as he'd hoped for. He'd always been a fast walker, and he'd always regarded it as a good thing, except for today. As Kirk approached his room, he began to hear voices. People were arguing, inside his cabin. Curious he shoved his ear up against the door.

"GO TO HELL BITCH"

"I'LL SEE YOU THERE ASSHOLE!"

Kirks eyes widened in surprise. Was that voice…Christine Chapel? Tempted to stay and listen in, Kirk's wet shirt was actually starting to annoy him. The doors slip open and Kirk felt his jaw actually drop as his eyes took in the scene before him.

Nurse Christine Chapel's hands were desperately grasping for the zipper on her dress as Dr. Roger Korbys trousers hung around his ankles, both with looks of sheer hatred on their faces.

The entire thing would have made Kirk laugh, if they hadn't been in his room. As the door had opened, both sets of eyes turned instantly to Kirk before Christine let out a gasp and Roger dived for his pants. They seemed equally embarrassed.

"Captain" Christine began in a desperate attempt to walk away from this with a shred of dignity.

"No explanation necessary" Kirk said, "I haven't seen anything. I just walked into an empty room"

Nurse Chapel gave Kirk a warm and thankful smile. She quickly walked to the door and gave Kirk a peck on the cheek, "Thank you Captain. You're a real gentleman." With that she left the room, a dumbstruck Roger Korby following after her a fresh argument already beginning.

"Now who's the cheater huh?" Kirk could hear Roger exclaim.

Kirk rolled his eyes and let out a laugh as the door slid shut and he was now in the privacy of his own empty room. Suddenly remembering his shirt, Kirk pulled it over his head and tossed it in a corner. He looked around quickly to see if he had any spares out, but seeing none he began towards the closet.

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"Any 2's?"

"I believe it is time for you to go fish"

Uhura sighed and grabbed a card from the top of the deck; to her complete and utter shock she drew a 2.

"Yay!" She squealed in excitement, "My turn again"

Spock gave her an encouraging smile, he loved seeing her happy.

"Got any aces's?"

Spock handed her 2 aces. As she added them to her pile she did a small cheer. It wasn't often you could win against a Vulcan. Normally they played 3-dimentional chess, in which there was virtually no contest. Spock won every round. In Go Fish however, Uhura was ahead.

"Got any-"

However, Uhura never finished her sentence. Just as she was about to ask for 10's the closet door slid open and there staring at her on the other side was Captain Kirk himself.

Sitting on the ground with the small stack of cards in her hand and Kirk staring, there was only one thought in Uhura's mind,

Crap.

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AN: Just a note about the Vulcan's and alcohol and chocolate. I know this isn't cannon but I always thought it was a nice little thing and so I'm using this logic in my story. Sorry if it drives anyone crazy. This chapter was a breeze to write so I hope you all enjoyed reading it. Thanks so much and remember please review.