AN: sorry sorry sorry sorry. I suck. I haven't updated in a week. I swear there's a good reason but I'm pretty sure none of you want to hear about it so please just take my word for it and accept my apology. Hope this chapter is good enough to make up for the wait. Thanks to the reviewers and just sorry.
Uki200 – omg is it just me or do most drunk people turn into 2 year olds?! Well that's been my experience anyway. I'm normally the person who takes care of the drunks so I happen to find them hilarious, dragonwitch250 – hmmm, a flashback. I've been considering it but I'm not really sure. Well if it happens you can totally take credit ^_^, Selene the Slytherine – so do i! However I don't know if it'll happen in this story, MiVarFan93 – More coming lolz. Thanks for the please, tis very polite and Vulcan-like, DiscoUnicorn – for some reason I feel like oldschool Uhura would be all fun and stuff but new Uhura would just be defensive and pissed, don't know why just do (shrugs), Batya – oh you have no idea. By the end of this Seder everyone will have totally lost their sanity, PadawanMom – About Sulu and his Vulcan thing, honestly it's pretty in character, I think you'll enjoy it. It shall be revealed in the Seder guaranteed, VulcanNinjaGirl – awww I'm so happy you like it! I love getting new readers! sadhappygirl – oh believe me we shall be seeing what Spock thinks of people really soon. And there will be chaos, Narnel – yeah drunk!Spock is totally unpredictable. Even I don't know what he's going to do next until the second I write, he keeps me guessing, BloomingSparrow – Spock giggling is legit something that should be in a horror movie imo. It just freaks me out when I think about it, Fireflower13 – I'd like to just remind everyone that drinking impairs you judgment and with all the secrets Spock's found out today that can't end well, .dolphins – woot, I'm so happy everyone seems to be liking my version of a drunk Vulcan, Ohtar Vicky – you're words are always so encouraging. Thanks. I like speaking simplicity too, just throwing that out there, Port-of-Seas – poor Spock. Everything seems to come back and bite him in the ** ya know? Oh my poor poor Vulcan, Helen Bache – Yay! I love when people love humor! It feels so under appreciated. Hope you enjoy the update! kimmerrz – gah oh no! Soup! I love soup! What type was it? I'm glad I make you happy, hope I can do that again, XUrMomX – so would I. Chocolate would become intoxicant of choice!
Disclaimer: Not mine, Roddenberry's.
Kirk felt his jaw drop in terror.
"What the hell?!"
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Kirk could hardly believe his eyes. He must have been dreaming. Or high. Or both. This was simply impossible. How could Spock go from calm cool and fun-hating to being Captain Chocolatzo? Wasn't it anti-Vulcan to make jokes? Kirk felt his head spinning and his thoughts being pulled in a hundred different directions at once. This was too strange for words. However, that didn't stop Kirk from yelling some out anyway.
"Spock! What are you doing?!" He shouted.
Spock in turn dropped his chocolazo ball with an expression of pure shock as if Kirk was the ghost of Passovers passed. Almost immediately, he changed again. His eyes glazed over and tears began forming as his lip started to quiver.
"You don't like my cereal" The Vulcan whispered as tears began rolling down his cheeks.
"Uh…no, no I… love it…" Kirk said in an attempt to keep Spock from sobbing hysterically. "Look see, yummy. Mmmmmm, good. Tasty."
"Y-y-you have not e-eaten any" Spock wailed as great tears streamed down his cheeks.
"Ok…I'll try some?" Kirk asked warily, his head still spinning in confusion.
Spock brightened instantaneously, breaking into a frightening smile, "Really? Really really? Captitain, you're more than good. You're GREAT! Here try!"
Spock then quickly gathered up a handful of chocolatzo balls and proceeded to stumble around and attempt to shove a few in Kirk's face.
"Woah! Too close!"
Spock ignored him, dropped the chocolatzo balls and grabbed Kirk into an all-too-tight hug.
"What is going on with you today?!" Kirk shouted as he attempted to pry the Vulcan off of him.
"I hads Chocolatzates" Spock replied, still attached to his Captain.
"What are you sick or something?"
"Nope *hic* not sick at all. Healthy as a Matzo ball. Look I rhymed. Rhyming is a most logical way to remember things. I shall now remember All and Ball"
"Ok…Let's go see Dr. McCoy now…maybe he can tell me what the hell is wrong with you"
"Okey dokey artichokey…Ah that is also a rhyme" Spock said giggling.
"Goodey" Kirk sighed as he dragged Spock out the door and down the hall to the medical bay.
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"Shank bone goes here" Uhura said as she pointed to one of the circles on the Seder plate.
Sulu carefully opened his Shank bone packet, placed it on the circle and took a step back to admire their work. While it hadn't been a hard job, it was still nice to complete something as far as Sulu was concerned. It appeared his Seder-mates did not agree. Uhura still seemed very unhappy to be there and Scotty had been off in Scotty –land. His biggest contribution was occasionally pulling Uhura's long ponytail and getting slapped seconds later for it.
"Well, looks like we're done" Sulu added pleasantly.
"Thank god" Uhura whispered to herself.
"Should we check in with Chekov? See if he has another job for us?" Sulu asked.
Scotty simply shrugged his shoulders before going back to fiddling with the snow-white table cloth.
"Lt. Uhura?"
"Do whatever you want helmsman" Uhura said distain not far from her words.
Sulu sighed, why oh why did he have to be stuck with the least helpful person on the crew and the one person who hated him for (in his opinion) no reason.
"Does anyone else want to make the call?" He asked hopefully, attempting to keep the atmosphere light and friendly.
"No" The others responded in unison.
Sulu heaved another sigh before grabbing his communicator from his belt and flipping it open, "This is Sulu to Chekov. Do you copy?"
"Yes I hear you wery vell Mr. Sulu. Is there a problem vith the Seder plate?" The Russian asked concern clouding his voice.
"No everything's good here" Sulu responded, "We've just finished. Is there anything else we should be doing?"
"You finished! Excellent! I am wery pleased" Chekov chirped, "You are right on schedule. I vill go and gather eweryone else and ve vill start the Seder as soon as possible"
With that the line went dead, and the three crew members were left alone in uncomfortable silence once again.
"So, did everyone hear that?" Sulu asked.
Uhura and Scotty nodded and an awkward silence settled over the group.
"Well…at least we'll start the Seder sometime soon" Sulu said after what felt like an eternity.
Uhura rolled her eyes, hatred rolling off her in waves "Wonderful"
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The second Kirk burst through the doorway, Spock clinging to his pants leg being dragged along the floor McCoy knew this wasn't going to be good.
"Jim…" He asked, "Did you break the hobgoblin?"
"No" Kirk responded quickly "I don't think so..."
"Don't think so?! Well good god man, why's he on the floor?"
"I'm not really sure about that either"
"Well what are you sure of!" McCoy shouted.
"Spock's gone bipolar is what I'm sure of" Kirk yelled back, "Take a look at him or detain him I don't care just get him off my leg"
McCoy hesitantly bent down and began prying the Vulcan from Kirk's leg just as the science officer released his grip. The two went flying backwards and landed on the floor, McCoy crushed by Spock.
Spock giggled enthusiastically "That was fun! It would be very logically to do it again because fun give you endorphins and make you happy and happy endorphins don't kill their captains…I believe. I heard that on an old movie…it was very logical"
"How long's he been like this" McCoy asked shoving Spock off of him.
Kirk shrugged, "Dunno. He was playing in chocolate-"
"Chocolatzo"
"when I found him"
"Chocolate?" McCoy repeated, realization lighting in his eyes.
"Yeah. 's there something wrong with that?" Kirk asked, still utterly baffled.
"Jim, how much do you know about Vulcan physiology"
"You're kidding right?" Kirk responded dumbly.
"Jim…Spock is drunk"
And for the second time in one hour Kirk felt his jaw drop, "He's what?!"
Spock, who was now playing contently with a chocolatzo ball he'd kept in his phaser holster, giggled his frightening giggle, "uh-oh spaghettio's. Is it time for Seder yet?"
AN: Well that's another one. I hope you all enjoyed it. Soooooo sorry about the long wait. I hope this was good enough for it. Thanks to all you reviewers, you sure know how to make a gal feel wanted. So anyway review for more, review for my sanity…just review. And thanks for reading.