Where Are You Now?

- - -

BELLA

Two weeks have passed since I practically jumped Edward. We still haven't had sex, and its driving me mad. We both agreed that now was not a good time to try for a baby. He wanted to get married first, and I agreed with him.

The phone rang, and I jumped out of bed to answer it. I didn't want it waking up Edward. I almost tripped over the door step before I made my way to the phone.

"Hello?" I asked, out of breath.

"Bells? It's mom." My breath caught in my throat.

"Hi mom." I said, flatly. I had no respect for my mother. When Dad would be at work all day, Renee would get high, and try to get me and Victoria to do it too. Of course, Tori would agree with mom, and go smoke with her.

I would stay in my room all day, blocking out their high laughter.

"Honey, I know that I'm probably the last person that you want to talk to right now, but this is about your sister." Did I care?

"What is it mom?" I asked, peeved.

"She's sick sweetie. She has cancer." Victoria was dying.

"How long, mom?" I asked.

"Not long. The doctors say a few days at the most." Why wasn't I feeling anything? She was my sister.

"Mom…why are you telling me this? I haven't seen her in ten years." Victoria left with Renee when she was fifteen, and I haven't seen or talked to her since.

"Honey…she has three kids. And you're their godmother. Their guardian." I think my heart just stopped.

"Ex-excuse me?" I asked, not sure if I heard her correctly.

"There's Ella…she's three, Ben, he's two, and then there's Alexis. She's only three months old." I could hear the tears in her voice.

Victoria had three children of which, were my godchildren. When Victoria died…they would become my responsibility.

"What about their father?" I asked, knowing that the kids didn't have the same father.

"Never met any of them." She said.

Of course she didn't.

"Where are you?" I asked.

"Forks hospital." They still lived in that god forsaken town?

"I can be down there in a couple days, but mom…Edward and I…these kids…I…" I didn't even know what to say.

"Honey…I know, I know. I'm so sorry you have to do this. They're adorable kids, though."

"I'm sure they are, but mom…I can't. I can't possibly take those kids. Edward and I work…and…a baby sitter is…"

"Bella. You're their guardian. It's your job to take care of them when Victoria is…gone."

"Mom! I never even knew about them, and now…they're being forced upon me!? You Can't just do this to me, mom!" I yelled.

"ISABELLA MARIE! I do not need this from you right now! My daughter is dying, and your denying her kids a mother!"

I took a deep breath. "I'll be there as soon as I can." And I hung up the phone.

EDWARD

"Mom! I never even knew about them, and now…they're being forced upon me!? You Can't just do this to me, mom!" I heard Bella yell.

I got up out of bed, and made my way to the kitchen, where I saw her in her black shorts with her pink tank top, leaning against the wall with the phone in her hand.

She took a deep breath. "I'll be there as soon as I can." And she hung up the phone.

I watched as she buried her face in her hands, and sobbed quietly. I walked over to her, carefully.

"Bella?" I asked quietly, and she turned around sharply.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you, but baby what's going on?" I asked, enveloping her in my arms.

"Edward…Victoria has cancer. She's…dying." I didn't understand. Bella hadn't talked to her sister in ten years, and her name never once came up, and now…she was crying about it?

I mean…yea. Victoria was Bella's sister, but she got high all of Bella's life, and never gave a damn about her sister.

I held Bella tighter.

"Edward…she has three kids." Bella said, and I still didn't know where she was going with this.

How could a woman like Victoria be so irresponsible, and bring three children into a life where they would not be loved, or wanted?

Bella pulled away from me.

"Bella…where are you going with this?" I asked, and followed her to the table.

"I'm their guardian, Edward. Once Tori is gone…those kids…are our kids."

I think that just went in one ear, and out the other.

"Our…our kids? As in…our kids?" I asked, completely flabbergasted.

"Yea, Edward! We become their parents! And…there's three of them! And not one of them is old enough to know that their mom is dying!" Bella was pacing the kitchen, and I was about to start soon.

I just couldn't believe what was going on. Money was no problem, and the new house was big enough for three more, but this was the farthest thing from what Bella and I wanted.

We had just discussed having one child, and now…we were getting three.

"How long does she have?" I asked.

"I don't know, Edward. Renee said only a few days! And then…those kids…oh my god, Edward! What are we going to do with three kids!?" I honestly couldn't give her an answer, because I was still trying to figure it out myself.

"Jesus Christ." I pinched the bridge of my nose, and sat down at the table.

I looked back at Bella, who was pacing the room, a hand on her head, pushing her hair back.

"Edward…the second that I get there…the minute I see them…I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it." She said without looking at me.

"How old are they?" I asked.

"Uh…a three year old…Ella, I think her name was. Uhm…a boy. He was like…two, his name's Ben. And then there's a three month old baby!" Bella cried.

A three month old baby. Fuck my life. Just fuck it!

"What's the baby's name?" I asked.

"Her name's Alexis, I think." She said, a look on her face that told me that she wasn't completely sure.

"Yea. Her name is Alexis." I could hear the hurt in Bella's voice.

"Ella's old enough. She's old enough to understand. She's gonna know that…I'm not her mom." Bella said, and I sighed.

"What about their father!?" I rushed, and Bella snuffed.

"Are you kidding me, Edward? Victoria can't keep a man if her life depended on it. They all have different fathers…and here's the shocker! Renee, nor Tori know any of them! What does that tell ya!?" She was stressing out.

"Bells. Baby, it'll be okay, alright? It'll all be okay. We'll figure something out." Was I trying to convince her, or myself?

"So your telling me that your willing to be the devoted father and husband that goes to work day in and day out, taking care of puking babies all day, with no time to yourself and your wife? Edward, come on!" Bella walked out onto the patio, and looked out into the backyard.

"Baby…I've got more money than I know what to do with. We can get a sitter." I tried to lighten the mood.

"EDWARD! A sitter!? Those kids are going to loose their mother, and you want them to be around a sitter all day!? How fucking dense are you!?" She yelled at me, and I fisted my hands through my hair.

Bella shook her head, and turned to me.

"Just when we were picking the pieces back up, finally getting over the baby…finally ready to be happy…" She didn't finish her sentence, but I'm pretty sure I knew the ending of it.

"I know, but Bella…they're young…and we have to raise them as our own. We don't have a choice.

"How long does it even take for them to get placed with us?" She asked.

"Well…they'll be put into our care once your sister passes, and then they'll be a hearing and a meeting, signing the paperwork, and then they'll be evaluations of the house, and they'll probably interview us. Make sure we'll take care of them." I told her, and she nodded.

"We have to…we have to get rooms together. What do kids even like?" She asked, and I had no idea myself.

"Toys?" I said, and it came out more like a question.

"Ben and Alexis are still in cribs, I'm assuming, and Ella is probably ready for a bed of her own. So…we need to get a nursery, and two rooms together." I said, and she nodded.

"We have to get to Forks." Bella said.

"They still live there!?" I asked, stunned.

"Edward…this is my mother and my sister that you're talking about." Bella said sarcastically.

"I'm going to go and take a shower." Bella said, and I nodded.

"I love you, sweetheart. Everything will work out. I promise." I said, and kissed her on the lips before she walked inside.

I decided that it would be a good idea to call Charlie.

I dialed the numbers, and waited for him to pick up. Charlie was normal. He was human, like Bella. I thank that man every day for making Bella who she is today.

"Yellow?" I smiled at his greeting.

"Charlie…it's Edward. Edward Cullen."

"Hey boy! I haven't talked to you…in what? Three years? How ya doin'?" He asked, and I could hear him eating something crunchy, and a bag being shuffled with football playing in the background. Same old Charlie.

"I'm good. Better than ever, actually. Bella and I are getting married!" I said, and sat down in the armchair.

"Your kidding!" He said, and I laughed.

"No, I'm serious. Haha. But actually…that's not the reason I'm calling. Have you heard? About Victoria?" Victoria wasn't Charlie's daughter, but he raised her all of her life. That is, until Renee left with her.

"I have. Bella heard?" He asked, and I sighed.

"Yea. Bella knows."

"Well then I'm guessing that you two are flying out?" He asked, and I nodded, remembering he couldn't see me.

"Yes, tomorrow. But Charlie…Victoria had three children, of which the fathers are unknown. She left the kids to Bella."

I head a glass clank, and a chair rock.

"W-what!?" Charlie asked, and it sounded like he had something in his mouth.

"One's three, one's two, and then there's a three month old baby." I told him, and I heard him cough.

"She shouldn't have to go through this! Jesus, she lost her daughter. You both did!" He said, and he sounded angry.

"I know. Believe me." I sighed.

"I can't believe this! Those two stupid…stupid amateurs. How could she have three children!?"

"I don't know Charlie." I just didn't know.

"Edward, son. If you need anything you just phone in, and I'll be on the next flight out there." He said, and I smiled.

"Thank you, Charlie."

"Oh, it's no problem. How's Bella holding up?" He asked.

"Not so good. She's just stressing out. Her nerves are getting the better of her. She's in the shower right now." I told him.

"Keep her occupied. Try to keep her calm. Don't let her hurt herself." He told me.

Bella was bipolar, and the smallest things would sometimes set her off.

THURSDAY - THE NEXT DAY

I woke up, and heard Bella's voice coming from the kitchen. I got up from the sofa, and walked in. She was sitting at the table, with a children's furniture catalog in front of her, three paint cans, and a number that said 'Rug Depot'

I gave her a small smile, and she returned.

I walked over to the stove, and turned on the kettle. I got out the coffee, and fixed two cups. I pulled out the leftover pancakes, and stuck them in the microwave.

Rubber pancakes and coffee would have to do this morning.

I walked over, and set her things down. She pushed the food aside, and picked up the coffee.

"Bella, you have to eat." I told her sternly, and she held up her hand, telling me to be quiet.

"Yes. I'd like the Cherry wood crib, item number 00895, please." She said, and listed several more items before thanking whoever it was, and hanging up.

"I'm sorry. I'm just…I'm trying." She said, and I smiled.

"I know." I smiled.

I looked at the catalog, and it said "24-hour delivery"

"So I've got the paint, and the rug people are coming in an hour. I've got painters coming at 12, and the furniture should be here tomorrow. I left the key with them, and told them that I'd send them the tip when we got back." She said, out of breath.

"Bella. Come on, love. This isn't good for you."

"Edward. We are getting on a plane in six hours to go and say goodbye to my dying sister, and pick up her kids. That is what's not good for any of us."

About an hour later, the carpenters came, and installed the tan carpets in all three rooms. The painters came about a half and hour later, and got the nursery painted purple, Ben's room painted blue, and Ella's room painted pink. The colors would have to do.

Once we were packed, and headed to the airport, I could tell that Bella was starting to ease a bit. We had talked about the situation, and once I had her convinced that the kids were going to love her, she seemed to believe me.

The problem was…did I believe myself?

I made my way to JFK airport, and once we went through security, and baggage claim, we made our way to our gates. We picked up Starbucks, and some magazines on the way. Bella had spotted a Hallmark store, and made me go in with her to buy the kids stuffed animals as a "We're your new parents" gift. Sense my sarcasm there?

We were sitting in the gate wait area, and I was drinking my coffee while Bella was glancing through a magazine.

"These people…who have five kids do it, and they work 24/7, so can we." I told her, and apparently that was the wrong thing to say.

"Those kids are messed up! They grow up thinking that they have seven mommy's." Bella said.

"Sorry." I apologized.

"It's okay. I'm just nervous." Bella said, and I pulled her into me.

"So am I love, so am I."

The ride to Forks was long, and most of it was spent sleeping.

Once we arrived at the airport, Bella was tired, as was I. But we had to do this.

We got our bags from baggage claim, which consisted of Bella's tote bag with the toys, and the blankets and pillows for the way home.

We rented a car to take us to the hospital and the hotel we were staying at. Bella and I had decided that staying at a hotel overnight, and catching a flight in the afternoon would be a better idea, so that the kids would get a good night sleep.

I hadn't had the time to fully process that these kids were going to look up to me, and call me daddy. Alexis would always think of me as her only father, as would the other kids being that they didn't have one all of their lives.

I think that Bella had gotten over the "I'm a mommy" factor, and was now concentrating on giving these kids the best life they could have.

I still couldn't get my mind off of how it felt like Scarlett was being replaced. Our only baby lost her parents, and now…other children were taking them from her. It ripped my heart out at the seams.

Bella fell asleep in the car on the way, and once we got there, I had to wake her up. I braced myself.

"Bella? Baby we're here. You gotta wake up, sweetheart." I rubbed her shoulder, and she slowly woke.

She inhaled deeply, and I wondered if her heart was pounding as fast as mine was.

"Okay." She said, as she unbuckled her seatbelt.

Before I got out of the car, she tugged my hand, and squeezed it for dear life.

I looked to her, and gave her a reassuring look. "It's gonna be okay." I said before leaning over and taking her face into my hands. I kissed her passionately, and it somehow felt pained.

She licked my lips, and I took her tongue into my mouth. I relaxed, and gripped her face tighter. We started getting hot and heavy, our breathing erratic, and I felt the need to have her. I could feel the straining in my pants, and I knew that we could NOT do this here.

As hard, and painful as it was, I let go of her lips. She whimpered in loss, and rested her forehead against mine.

"I love you." She whispered.

"I love you too. So much, Bella." I said.

I pulled away, and shut the door. I came around, and opened her door. We got the bag from the trunk, and made our way to the doors, hand in hand.

We braced ourselves as we walked inside. We walked to the desk, and Bella asked for her sister.

"Uhm…we're here to see Victoria Swan?" She asked quietly. It was around 5:30 in the morning, and the hospital seemed deserted even with the doctors, and nurses, and people walking around.

I hated hospitals. I hated the sound of the heart monitors, and the sound of doctor shoes. I hated the sound of three phones ringing at once, and I hated those old, worn out waiting room chairs.

"Her room is 567. I'm sorry about your sister, honey." The old nurse said to Bella, and Bella smiled meekly.

"Thank you." Bella said.

"Your welcome." The nurse smiled back, and answered the next call.

We made our way to the elevators, and I could tell that Bella's resolve was fading away. As she pressed the 5, I pulled her into my arms, and she held onto me for dear life. Her tears were soaking into my sweatshirt, and I tried rubbing circles on her back.

Once we got to the fifth floor, my nerves were through the roof. We walked down the hallway, and the numbers mocked me.

562.…

563...

564...

565...

566...

And 567...

"Oh my god, Edward, I can't do this. I, I can't breathe!"

"Bella, calm down. It's going to be fine, baby it's gonna be fine."

I heard footsteps running, and a very firmiliar voice. I heard Bella gasp. I turned around, and saw a little girl, who looked about three years old, running towards us. Ella.

She had blonde hair, which pulled into small ponytails on top of her head, the rest of her hair down.

She had a Barbie doll in her hand.

I bent down, and Bella just stood, completely frozen. I took her hand, and she stood next to me.

Ella came up to me, and wrapped her small arms around me. I wrapped my free hand around her, and held her tightly to me. Tears welled up in my eyes.

"I love you daddy." She said into my ear, and I kissed her neck. I didn't know what to say.

"I love you too, baby girl." How could this small, innocent, perfect little girl possibly love me? All I knew…is that in the short five seonds that I knew her…she had become my own.

The little boy that was coming towards us had short auburn hair, much like Victoria's, and he was holding a ratty looking bunny in his arms. He stayed behind a woman who I presumed as Renee's leg.

The tiny baby in her arms must have been Alexis. She had a small amount of bronze hair on her head; much like mine. It took to my surprise. She was so small.

I heard Bella whisper 'Hi' to her mother, and she hugged her for the first time in ten years.

The small girl pulled away from me, and walked over to Bella, and touched her leg.

Bella whiped around, and bent down to Ella.

"Hi sweetie. I'm Bella." Bella smiled through her tears, and I watched as Ella reached her Barbie doll out to Bella.

"This is for you, mommy." Bella gasped, and pulled Ella into her arms, and held her tightly, sobbing into Ella's hair. I smiled meekly at her, as Bella did the same to me. I got up, and said hello to Renee, before bending back down in front of Ben.

"Hi Ben. I'm Edward." I tried. I could see his small tears, and he wiped them away hesitantly with his sleeve.

I smiled at him, and reached out to him, and he hesitantly walked to me.

"Tis is Mr. Snuggles" He said quietly.

"Well hello there, Mr. Snuggles, I'm Edward." I smiled at Ben, who just looked at me.

"Are you gonna be my daddy?" He asked, hugging the bunny tighter.

I glanced up to Bella who had her hand on Ella's back, and was gently cooing to the baby in Renee's arms.

I smiled at Bella, and she looked at me with tears in her eyes.

I looked back to Ben. "Do you want me to be your daddy?" I asked, questioning myself.

The little boy nodded hesitantly. It broke my heart.

I choked back my sobs, and took Ben's small arms gently into my hands.

"Then I'll be your daddy, Ben. And I will never leave you." I said, my tears now falling down my eyes.

"I don't want you to weave. I want you to stay." I pulled Ben into my arms, and stood up.

"I won't leave you, buddy. I promise." I kissed his forehead, and he smiled at me. I smiled back the best smile I could.

I gave Ben to Bella, and took Alexis from Renee. She was hesitant to give her to me.

I knew that this little girl would be the hardest for Bella and I.

"Hi Alexis." I whispered against her forehead, before kissing it.

She gurgled, and her small fist hit against my neck.

"I'm gonna be your daddy." I said, smiling down at the small baby in my arms. This was my family.

BELLA

I smiled at Edward, and the sight broke my heart. Edward was crying, and that of course, made me cry.

The little girl broke away from him, and walked hesitantly over to me.

I bent down in front of her. She held her Barbie doll out to me. "This is for you, mommy." I couldn't take it.

I gasped, and pulled her tightly to me, and held onto her. She wrapped her tiny arms around my neck, and I couldn't stop the tears from flowing.

I looked to Edward who was talking to the small boy that I knew was Ben.

Ella broke away from me, and I smiled at her.

"Sweetie, you know what happened to your mommy, right?" I asked her.

She nodded. "Mommy is going to go and live with god. And we're going to live with you. Are you my new mommy?" She asked, and my heart broke.

"I guess I am, Ella. Is that okay?" I asked her, and she nodded, with a smile on her face. This broke my heart even more. Knowing that she was so happy to know that she had another mommy. It made me realize that she didn't want Victoria as her mother.

I kissed her on her head, and stood up, my hand still on her back.

I looked at the baby girl in my mother's arms. This was going to be hard.

"Hi Alexis. I'm your mommy." I said, and my breath caught in my throat.

She whimpered, and I smoothed the soft patch of bronze hair she had on top of her head. It reminded me of Edward's hair.

I kissed her forehead, and Edward came over to me, picking up Alexis from my mother's arms. She was hesitant, but she let her go.

Edward handed Ben to me, and I took him into my arms. "Hi Ben. I'm Bella." I said, and he shook his head.

"What's wrong honey?" I asked.

"You're my mommy. Your not Bella." I smiled, and the tears came again.

I nodded my head, and smiled at him. "I'm mommy."

I recently just came up with this story line, and I have to admit, I cried alot throughout this chapter, but I love how it turned out. I hope you all do too!

Hugs

-Steph

REVEIW!REVEIW!REVEIW!