Chapter Fourteen

Crossroads

Lily gasped, unable to catch her breath as Rusty quickly did away with her skirt. His mouth was all over her, starting from her lips and moving downward. His slick, gliding movements over her body where enough to make her lose all her wind.

They had been together all day, hardly really talking. Rusty had met with her after her visit with Isabel, and Lily had just transformed into Ella. The final phase of the plan was in motion, Saul already at the bank. Virgil and Turk threw on a set of bank guard uniforms Lily has snagged for the event with the same amount of effort as models changing backstage during a fashion show, and then the four of them jumped into the van and headed towards the bank. Linus had gone ahead with Saul to offer any assistance, although Saul argued that he had no reason to be "babysat".

When they arrived at the bank, Lily – or Ella, rather – hurried up to the upper floor to meet Hollings in his office. To her surprise, he was there. He should have been on his "vacation". He should have been long gone, but instead he was just being stupid. Smug, and oh, so very stupid. He was sitting as his desk, watching the sport scores intently with a large smile on his face. Ella smiled to herself as she delivered his morning coffee. He was unaware of the money transfer, which was good. If he didn't know his money was gone, he wouldn't be looking for it. It would give them more time – if needed – to tie up any loose ends. Not that she had left any, of course. Not as long as Saul was doing his job. Saul had yelled at her when she had expressed that to him.

A little later, however, Hollings was in a less than happy mood when he read the paper. Frank's media contact had come in handy, and was making for a very entertaining show for Lily. Not only did he have to worry about his scandal, but he had to worry about his bank going bankrupt in the meantime. Saul was slowly extracting all his money, and the threat of a bank run loomed in the near future as word spread of his corruption.

Then, after Saul had thrown a proper-sized adult tantrum and Hollings left in a desperate huff, the six of them left – one at a time.

In the van, Linus, Virgil, Turk, and Saul discussed the entire operation in general. As Lily slid into the backseat, Rusty sat down next to her. She had expected it. She hadn't expected him to slip her hand off her lap and directed it to rest firmly in his palm, however.

The money had been split up evenly in Lily's apartment, each member of the team getting their fair share in a set of generic duffel bags that had been used to carry the currency out of the bank.

The last to leave was Danny, lingering in the doorway as he watched Rusty nervously pacing the room. Lily gave him a kiss on the cheek, closing the door on him. After the door was securely locked, Lily nearly ran into Rusty's arms. The money had somehow made its way out of the duffel bags that belonged to the two, and now littered the bedspread and surrounding floor with green, fresh printed wealth.

Rusty lifted her onto the bed, pressing his weight on her as her hands explored the muscles in his chest. Trembling with anticipation, her fingers found the buttons of his shirt and began to tear them open.

It felt so good. To be near him. To be in his arms. To be underneath him. "You know," she whispered as his tongue danced around her neck, "this is so familiar."

"Is that bad?" he grunted against her skin.

"Not at all," she responded, feeling his hands warming the skin on her back as he lifted her shirt from her torso. He moved instinctively, knowing what she liked and what she did not. He leaned over her, his mouth lingering around her ear as his teeth tugged on her lobe. She groaned, receiving heat-filled pleasure as she felt his growing erection against her thigh.

She felt his hand moving, the pads of his fingertips caressing the flesh between her thighs. With a swift, forceful motion, her parted her legs and settled himself in. Lily felt her growing anticipation forming knots in her stomach as it twisted and turned.

A knock on the door startled her as she fought with the buckle of his belt.

"Ignore it," Rusty pleaded into her ear, his mouth leaving seconds later to plant kisses along her neckline. He move down her body, slipping his hands under her skirt and up to a more intimate area. His fingertips grazed her thigh for mere nanoseconds to remove her panties before he moved them inside her, feeling her arch and wiggle with pleasure.

She moaned deeply, her fingers locking in his hair.

The knock sounded again, harder. A pounding against the door.

Rusty moved his fingers within her, trying to find just the right spot. Moreover, he was trying to distract her from whoever was on the other side of the door. She gasped at his movements, her hands moving to his shoulders as she pressed her nails into his skin.

Knock. "Lily? Lily? I have to talk to you!" It was Danny. He was screaming.

Rusty stopped, removing his fingers and falling limply at her side. Lily tried to collect her breath, propping herself up on her elbows. "Why'd you stop?"

"It's your dad," he pointed out, stretching his arms above his head.

"So?"

"So… I want to make you scream, Lil, but not in front of him. He's not going away until you talk to him."

Lily rolled on top of him, kissing him hard. Her tongue slipped through his lips, coaxing his mouth into a more passionate kiss. "You want to make me scream?"

Rusty laughed, nudging her to slid off. "Correction. I'm going to make you scream. Now while you're dad is out there, though. Stage fright."

Lily laughed, although extremely annoyed with her father. She collected her strewn clothes from the floor, and proceeded to put them on. "Give me five minutes."

"Lily, I'm lying half naked in a pile of money on your bed. You better take less than five minutes," he kidded. He realized he had been saying her name with almost every statement out of his mouth, and he liked it.

She ran to the door, sliding across the floor as she grabbed onto the brass and yanking the door open. She jumped out into the hallway and closed the door behind her, seeing her father peeking into the room. "Can I help you, Daddy?" she chimed, more pleasant than she would have been otherwise.

"Lily, I… I have to tell you something." He slid his hand onto her shoulder and started guiding her down the hallway, away from the door. "I was wrong, Lil, and I needed to tell you that."

Lily nodded, excitedly. "Message received, Dad. Thanks!" She tried to turn and reenter her apartment, but Danny had a firm hold on her shoulder.

"Don't you want to know what I was wrong about?" He asked, his eyes pouring out confusion and sincerity.

Lily spotted his outward attempt to connect with her, and changed her own facial expression. Excitement and anticipation gave way to generality. "Of course, Dad. And I appreciate that you're admitting it, but can't this wait until morning? I'm really tired and…" It wasn't exactly a lie. She had hardly slept at all during the job, and she was feeling a bit lagged. "How about breakfast. Just you and me? Like old times?"

"No, sweetheart. I have to tell you before you make a mistake." She managed to wiggle away from him, and had proceeded to turn her back on him. "Lily, come back here."

She waved over her shoulder. "Tomorrow morning, Dad. Promise. Bright and early."

Danny threw his hands in the air. "Lily! I was wrong to push you and Rusty back together!"

Lily froze, mid-step. She planted her foot on the ground, pivoting with such rigidity that she nearly fell over. The annoyance had broken through her previous emotions, taking the form of anger. Extreme anger. "What?"

Danny averted his eyes to the carpet, his chin falling over the collar of his shirt and pinning a button to his chest. "I shouldn't have said anything to Rusty. I should have… I should have seen how unhappy you were, and now… now I needed to tell you. You and Rusty are no good for each other, Lil. I think it would be a mistake to go back to what was once so…"

Lily grabbed her throat, her face turning bright red. "I can't breathe. Oh, God… I can't breathe…." Her hands fought the air around her to find the wall, where she collapsed down to the floor. Danny took several steps in her direction, but she threw her arms out to shield herself from him. "No! You told me you wanted us to be together! Then… then you tell me… you tell me that it's all wrong. You played on my fears, Dad. You played me! This is all you ever do to me, and I keep letting you! Oh, God… I can't breathe!" she screamed.

"Lily, please. I'm just trying to do what's best for you now."

"Now? So what were you trying to do before, Dad?"

"I thought that was best for you before, but… I see things now. I get it."

"You don't get shit, Dad!

He moved towards her, watching her struggle to pick herself up with the aid of a small table next to the wall, a vase of flowers teetering precariously on its surface. "No, Lily. Listen to me!" He demanded, grabbing her wrists. "I know what you think you feel for him. I know that I led you to those feelings. But, damn it, Lily, I'm trying to fix that now." She whimpered under his hold. She had never seen this side of her father before, but she always knew he was there somewhere.

"He loves me," she pouted.

"He loves you sometimes. He loves you when it's convenient for him. The rest isn't love, Lily. It's a test. He was always testing you, seeing how far he could push you. It's all the same to him, sweetheart."

Lily shook her head, her eyes slowly narrowing as tears took over. "How can you talk about him like that?"

Danny let her go, let her shrink away from him. "Because I know him."

She backed away, bumping into the table with the vase. The flowers shook violently in their vase, water spilling out onto the carpet as the blue container shifted and then fell onto the floor. The resonating sound from the crash of the vase took her back, knocking memories into her brain. Memories that she had been trying so hard – and finally succeeded for a short time – to block out in order to move forward.

She looked towards the door to her apartment. Rusty was on the other side, waiting for her. If she went back in there, she wouldn't be moving forward. Instead, she would be taking a trip back to her past. Her miserable, disheveled, heartbroken past.

"Do you want someone to love you conditionally, Lily?" Danny asked, watching her stare into a void.

She shook her head. She was angry. Angry at herself. She had wanted her father to realize what she had realized a long time ago, and he had. He had, except… except she no longer believed it herself.

Part of her wanted to go back in to Rusty, forget everything that had happened between them in hopes of having a happy future. In hopes. There was a chance she would end up more cynical than ever. But was she willing to take that chance?

Another part of her wanted to walk down the hallway, down the steps and out the building. She wanted to keep walking, walking to the airport and boarding a random flight to anywhere. Anywhere she could start over. Anywhere where they had never heard of Rusty Ryan, Danny Ocean, or Ocean's Eleven. Anywhere she could start over, forget who she was before, and ensure that she would be happy. But could she really do that?

Her future was doomed, either way. If she stayed, there was a chance she would be miserable. More miserable, because the pieces of her heart would have broken into even tinier pieces, ripping through her soul. She couldn't stand another blow like the one Rusty had given her before. Thinking, she knew Rusty would ultimately do something to break her heart again. It was who he was. He may have loved her, but he said he loved Isabel. He loved Isabel, yet he left her. He hurt her. Then again, if the left she would have to live with he misery of never knowing if she would have been happy with him.

So which road to chose?

Lily shook her head in response to her father's question. "No."

Danny let his head fall onto his shoulder. He was doing it again. He was unintentionally torturing her, and it tore at his heartstrings. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry I didn't see it sooner."

She deiced to make her own path.

Lily walked over to him, curling into his chest as he held his arms out to her. She felt him nestled his chin in her hair, knowing that something was wrong, but at the same time knowing that it was not the time to talk about it. She hugged him tighter than she ever had before, even though she would never be able to look at her father the same way again. "I love you," she whispered to only him. How could she not? He was her father. He was trying to do what was best. Even if it was mentally killing her.

He forced a light laugh, the vibration in his chest soothing her into him even more. "I love you, too, Lily. Always."

Lily closed her eyes, letting him gently rock her in place for a second. After a long moment, he nudged her away a bit. She opened her eyes, immediately taking in the flowers on the floor She knew what she had to do.

All the rage bubbled back to the surface. If she left, she was going to leave behind everything. Even her father. Her little sister. Tess.

She knew what she had to do.

Tears enveloped her eyes, running down her cheeks like a fountain of sorrow. She kissed her father on the cheek, turned, and headed back into her apartment.

All Danny could do was stand and watch.

She walked back into the apartment, seeing Rusty still in the position she had left him in. "Rusty?" she spoke softly, barely able to catch her breath between sobs.

He heard her distress, shooting up from the bed and rushing to his side. She stopped him at arm's length, her hand on his chest. "Stop. Just stop."

"Lily, what's wrong? What the hell happened in the five minutes you were out there?"

The sobs overtook her. "I can't do this!" she screamed, her airways closing again

- - - - - -

Once Lily had clamed her hysterics down, she had gotten a chance to at least try to explain what it was all about. She sat on her bed, holding a pillow to her stomach – which had started churning and burning.

"I was stupid," she confessed, trying to keep her eyes as dry as possible.

Rusty shook his head, unable to look at her. "I don't understand."

"It's too late for this, Rusty. A relationship isn't fighting about who has the upper hand, and that's all we do whether either of us wants to admit it or not."

"Lily, please."

"Maybe… maybe we really never had a chance, Rusty. Maybe we were both just so naïve to think that we could work out. Once upon a time, I was waiting for you to sweep me off my feet but… this isn't exactly a fairytale. I'm not my father's little princess, anymore. And you… well you're not exactly a white knight, Rusty. If anything, this is more like a … a…"

"Nightmare."

"A reoccurring nightmare. I don't think there could be a happy ending for us, Rusty. And I can't take any more heartache. I just can't."

Rusty dropped to his knees, grabbing onto her ankle closest to the edge of the bed. "You don't know that, Lil. You can't. I… I…" Come on, Rusty! Just tell her! "I… I love you, Lily. God, I love you! Please, don't do this."

But Lily wasn't listening. She couldn't listen, or else she might change her mind. All the things she had realized, all the conclusions she had come to, were still foreign to him. She could only let him figure them out on his own. And he would, in time. And as for her…

She would take her money and head off in the morning.