**CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE END OF FITV**
In September's Support Stacie Auction, JAustenlover (JA) donated a beyond-generous amount of $$ in exchange for words from me. She asked for Jasper's Tuesday-morning surprise ("surprise" is more spoiler friendly :), from his point of view.
For JA...
Time frame: January 28 - 29, 2013 - almost three years after FitV Chapter 22: "In Which the End Is the Beginning."
In Which Jasper Seizes the Moment
. . . . . . . .
"Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same."
- Emily Brontë
. . . . . . . .
"It's perfect."
"You think so?"
"Yup. She'll love it." Emmett slides the ring over the tip of his pinky, barely getting it to the first knuckle before it sticks. He holds his hand out in front of him and tilts it so the stone catches the light of the overhead fluorescents.
"It's not... not enough?"
"Come on, J, how well do you know her? You know this is exactly the kind of ring that Bella will fucking love. It's gorgeous and modest, just like her."
I watch Emmett inspect the ring and nod; he has all but stolen the words from my head. As soon as I had seen it in the jewelry case, I had known it was the right one for her, even though we hadn't talked about rings.
"Nervous?" He arches an eyebrow and jerks his chin toward my leg, which is bouncing restlessly. I've been jittery since I picked up the ring – sized and gleaming – an hour ago, and I can't seem to shake it.
"Yeah, a little." I close my eyes and lean back in the chair, trying to calm myself down. I take a few deep breaths, exhaling through my mouth like my therapist had instructed. It helps.
"What are you panicking about? Are you worried about what she'll say?"
"No, not really, but-"
"No buts. You know what she'll say. No question."
He's right. I am almost 100% certain of her response. We haven't talked about it directly, but we've both made enough general comments and references to know that the other is on the same page, and that the book that contains those pages extends very far into the future.
"I want to make it special for her and so far I don't have any ideas."
"Well, don't go overboard – it's Bella. You could probably do it over pizza and she'd be thrilled."
I imagine the way her face would probably light up while she tried not to get pizza sauce everywhere. He's right. She really won't care.
I lean forward, feeling a bit better, and pick up a framed photo on Emmett's desk. "How's my nephew doing?"
"Ah, excellently. We had our four-month well-baby exam last week and he's still in the 99th percentile for height and weight." Hands behind his head, reclined in his desk chair, he's as proud of a dad as I'd expect. "Oh, actually..." He tips forward and rifles through some papers on his desk, finally producing an envelope. He pulls a small photo from it and hands it across his desk. "Alice has been taking a million photos. Rosie wanted to make sure you had one."
In the picture, not-so-little Carter is wearing a shirt with a little football sewn on the front. Ever since Carter entered the world at a generous twenty-three inches – with blue eyes and a full head of curly, dark hair – Edward and I have been betting on whether he'd end up playing defense for the Seahawks or the Canucks. Dan, Alice's boyfriend, is betting on offers from both teams. I'll have to show Edward the photo next time we see him as odds are in my favor.
"Thanks. Bella will love it." I tuck the photo into my wallet and stand. Emmett puts the ring back into its little box and I take it, checking out the ring once more before putting the box in my pocket.
"Keep me posted, man. Rosie's going to flip." He walks around his desk and shakes my hand before stuffing his hands in his pockets. He has a thoughtful look on his face and I wait to see what he has to say. He waits another moment before speaking. "Five years ago, who would have guessed this would happen, huh?"
I chuckle and shake my head. I still remember the first time I officially met Bella. Edward had met her the previous week in one of his classes and they had been so wrapped up in one another when he finally brought her by the house that I wasn't sure she had even caught my name.
"And..." Emmett rubs the back of his neck and looks hesitant. "This is probably going to sound like a bunch of bullshit or whatever, but... It's been a tough year and, all things considered... I'm really proud of you, J." He shrugs and smiles, his hand going back to his pocket.
Coming from anyone other than Emmett, I probably would have bristled. But he's right – it had been a hard year.
We'd all struggled when Mom was sick. While her surgery early last year had been successful, the recovery had been long. Between trying to stay positive for Dad and Rose, and balancing classes and work... Well, Bella, Emmett, and Rose are the only ones who know I had been seconds away from relapse this time last year.
It had taken a good three months before I really felt like myself again, but since then, things had been good. The past four months had been nearly perfect. While Dr. Bennett, the therapist I'd been with since I'd gotten out of rehab three years ago, had twitched an eyebrow in hesitation when I'd mentioned wanting to propose to Bella, she'd been nothing but supportive since then. She regularly asked me about my plans and the ring, probably looking for signs that I was too tense or anxious, which – until I had picked up the ring an hour ago – I hadn't been.
Bella had stood by me the whole time, encouraging me to talk about everything that had been bothering me, going to group meetings, having her own monthly session with a colleague of Dr. Bennett's. Her understanding and love had been rock-solid. Maybe that was why I was so nervous now. Sometimes, I was still unsure about what it was that I could give her that someone else couldn't. This proposal, and making it memorable, was one thing that I could do for her. If I could figure it the fuck out.
. . . . . . . .
"Babe?"
An hour after I get home, Bella's voice startles me out of my thoughts. I quickly close my bedside table drawer, hoping she doesn't need something from there before I get a chance to move the ring box. She's unbuttoning her sweater as she walks into the room.
"You're home early." She smiles as she tosses her sweater over the end of the bed and comes to sit next to me.
"I stopped to see Emmett after lunch and came home afterward." I kiss her hello and push some of her wind-whipped hair behind her ear.
"Everything okay with Em?" A small frown turns down the corners of her mouth and I kiss her again. Her pink cheeks are cold – the winter has been rougher than usual, with high winds and more than our usual share of snow. I rub her face gently with my thumbs, trying to warm her up. When I pull back, she's smiling, her eyes a little brighter.
"He's fine. I just needed to run something by him." We're very open in our communication – something that's a big change from when we first got together – and Bella knows I wouldn't keep anything important from her. I silently hope she doesn't suddenly decide to be nosy. With as amped up as I am about the ring, I'm worried that it won't take much for me to just blurt it out.
"Okay. How's Carter?"
I take out my wallet and show Bella the photo Emmett had given me as I give her the low-down on their visit to the doctor. She gets up to finish changing, but not before snagging the photo and telling me she'll make a copy or see if she can get the digital image from Emmett.
"Did you hear about the snow?" she asks. I watch her as she changes. Track pants replace her slacks; a red hoodie goes on over a long-sleeved t-shirt. Her skin is covered too quickly and I wonder how averse she'd be to me reversing the dressing process.
"Yeah, what are they saying now? Six inches?"
"On the way home, I heard eight to ten."
"Which probably means three inches, max."
She rolls her eyes and throws a pair of my jeans at me. "You're no fun. You want to brave the crowds with me and stock up on bread, milk, and toilet paper?" She grins widely as she pulls her hair into a ponytail and slips on a pair of old running shoes. After growing up in Arizona, she's still eager whenever there's the threat of a snow day. Maybe going out for a bit will be a good distraction from the little box in the bedside table – the little box that still feels like a basketball-sized lump in my pocket.
"You bet. We can even get marshmallows for your cocoa." She chuckles when I swat her ass and we head out the bedroom door.
. . . . . . . .
Two hours later, the snowflakes have started to fall and we've managed to survive the mad crush at the grocery store. The imminent panic that arises at the simple word "snow" will always amaze me. We've bought all of the essentials – including peppers, onions, and fresh tortillas for whatever she has planned for dinner tomorrow night – just in case we're snowed in for a day or two. We put away the groceries and I help Bella throw together some pasta and garlic bread.
By eleven, she's yawning in between jumping up every ten minutes to check the snow status out the window.
"Two inches, I think!"
I flip off the lights in the living room and hall and move to the window to stand behind her. With my arms around her waist, we watch the snow fall for a few minutes. The room is a little cold but her body is warm and I hold her close.
I had thought that finally having the ring in my possession would ease my mind – it was the next to last step of something I had been contemplating for months – but ever since I left Emmett's office, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. What he said has had me thinking all night. Five years ago, things were so different: we were nearing graduation, Bella and Edward were inseparable, and while Alice and I were at the start of our decline, I honestly hadn't been able to picture any future that didn't figure her prominently. It hurts to think about everything we've all been through these past five years, but I can't regret any moment of it, since it led me to this hallway, to this woman.
I press my nose to the top of her head and hope she doesn't turn around and see what is probably a contemplative expression on my face; I'm not sure what I would say if she asks why I've been distracted all night. I shake out of it when she yawns again and stretches in my arms. "Bed?" I ask.
She nods and lets the curtain drop closed. "Maybe by the time we wake up, they'll have closed the schools. Dad won't make you go in for anything, will he?" She twists to look up at me.
I shake my head. "Nope, I'd be yours all day."
"Well, let's hope for some extra heavy snow then, shall we?" She stretches up to kiss me before yanking my hand and pulling me up the stairs.
. . . . . . . .
I'm awake at 5:30 without the alarm. The room is unnaturally quiet, and it takes me a minute to realize there's no sound of cars from Aurora, which is usually busy, even this early in the morning. I look over at Bella: she's curled on her side, facing me. My eyes have already adjusted and I carefully push a few strands of hair away from her mouth. She doesn't move and her little breaths blow across my hand as she sleeps.
Moving slowly so as not to wake her, I slip out of the bed and walk to the window. The streetlight in front of the house illuminates snow that's almost high enough to cover the license plate on the front of my car and is still falling steadily. I grab my phone from the bedside table before leaving the room. A browse to a local news station's website finds that the public school system officially closed an hour ago. I send a quick email to my dad to let him know I'll be home and to call if anything comes up. Things have been pretty quiet the past week or so with my clients, but I'll check my work email later in the day to make sure no one needs anything. I've been with the firm for almost five years and I have to admit that I'm looking forward to finishing my Masters in the spring and moving on to something different.
I get some water from the kitchen and turn up the heat, since we'll be home all day, before heading back to the bedroom. Bella hasn't moved and I sit on the edge of the bed instead of crawling back in with her.
My meds are in the bedside table drawer next to the ring and I swallow them with the water before taking the little box out of the drawer. I don't open it – I just hold it as I think.
Sleep had been elusive during the night. I'd gone through a dozen different proposal scenarios in my head, trying to come up with the perfect one, but had discarded them all. A trip to the baseball stadium where I'd taken her to see Phil play years ago: the season didn't start for another couple of months and I didn't want to wait that long. A trip down to the pier one evening: but what would I do once I got there? Drop to my knee in front of all the world? Bella would be mortified. I briefly entertained the idea of a fancy Valentine's Day dinner before pushing that away with thoughts of Bella laughing at the cliché of it.
Everything I'd thought of was either too simple, too complicated, or too cheesy... Around 2:00 a.m., I had forced my brain to shut off and stop thinking about it temporarily. I have to hope the perfect idea will come once I've stopped worrying about it.
When something brushes my back, I jump.
"Hey, what are you doing? Everything okay?" Bella's cold fingers run over my skin again and goose bumps break out over my arms. The clock's bright red digits read 6:25. I turn around and she's up on her elbow, hair everywhere, eyes only half open.
"I'm fine. Schools are closed." I pick up her hand and squeeze her fingers.
"Yeah?" She smiles and tugs my hand. "Come back to bed, then. You must be freezing."
"I wouldn't be if you didn't steal my clothes." I casually drop the box back into the drawer as I slip under the covers and make my way over to Bella. Hopefully she's still sleepy enough that she didn't notice.
"I like your clothes." She yawns as she slips her arm around my waist. For Christmas, Bella bought me a pair of old-school pajamas – button-down top with drawstring bottoms – but had immediately claimed the shirt as her own. She wears it when I wear the pants; she laughs and says we looked like rumpled magazine models.
I pull her to my chest and she nestles in after she draws the covers up over us. Her voice breaks our comfortable quiet several minutes later. "What are we going to do all day?"
Her breath is warm across my skin, her hand temptingly low on my hip, and more than one creative thought speeds through my mind. I glide my hand down her back to her thigh, which is hitched up over my leg, and run my finger along the hem of my pilfered shirt. "I can think of a few things." I kiss the top of her head as I rub her leg.
"And what will we do for the other fifteen hours?"
I feign a growl and quickly flip her onto her back. Her hands are on my shoulders and she's smirking up at me as I kneel over her. The blankets have fallen away and I yank up the bottom of the shirt to expose her stomach. Brown eyes grow wide as she realizes my intent and tries to shield herself, but her small hands are no match and I grab them both with one hand and push them above her head. She tries to squirm away as I trace lazy designs over her stomach.
"Jasper!" she huffs. "Knock it off!"
"Apologize for questioning my stamina?"
"Yes, yes, I'm sorry! You're fantastic!" She's giggling and gasping; her hair tangles around her as she thrashes in weak protest. Even in the dim light, she's gorgeous and perfect and just... mine.
My fingers halt their torture as I freeze above her. I slowly release her arms and bring my hand to her cheek. She quietly regains her breath as she watches me.
"What is it?" she asks softly.
Incapable of articulating the thoughts that are flooding my mind, I just shake my head. Her skin is soft as I run my finger down her cheek and over her jaw. I don't know how I found this girl, or how things had worked out despite how fucked up I'd been when we got together. That she hadn't abandoned me and had instead stood by my side through more shit than anyone should have to deal with was a not-so-small miracle.
"You look sad. What's wrong?" Her forehead creases as she speaks and I gently press the small wrinkles away, smoothing her skin until they disappear and she's smiling tentatively.
"Nothing's wrong. I was just thinking."
"About what?" She hooks her thumbs into my waistband as I balance above her.
"About stupid shit. Like how lucky I am to have you."
"That is stupid." She rolls her eyes and makes a noise that's awfully close to a snort. When I don't respond and keep rubbing her forehead, her expression softens. "Tell me what you're really thinking."
I open my mouth to deflect, but like a lightning strike, the idea that this is the moment flashes through my head.
Emmett was right. Location doesn't matter. There had never been anything fancy about Bella and me; an extravagant proposal would be inconsistent with who and what we are.
Once the thought is in my head, I can't shake it. I hover over her in uncertainty before making up my mind.
I lower my chest enough to feel the material over her breasts against my chest. Dipping my head down, I kiss her softly, my lips barely touching hers. It's a struggle; as adrenaline courses through my body, I want to crush her to me. I want to take her and mark her as mine in a much more fundamental way than with a piece of jewelry or the tattoo on her back. But as she moves her hands up my back, before she can pull me closer, I push myself up and shift to my side of the bed.
Confusion crosses her face as I pull the little box from the drawer again. My hand is big enough to cover it and I don't think she's seen it. I roll onto my back and slide an arm under her, drawing her on top of me.
"What did you do?" She's looking curiously at my hand as she straddles me, her weight settling on my abdomen. I'm propped up on my pillows and am more reclined than lying down.
I take a deep breath and pause before speaking, squeezing the small box in my hand. Do I really want to do this now?
Yeah, I realize, I really do.
I haven't planned this at all and I have no idea what to say. Mom loves to tell us how Dad had spent two weeks carefully planning a ten-minute speech that he recited as if he were doing community theatre. Even Emmett had something ready to go before he'd asked Rosalie, although he psyched himself out and had ended up winging it all.
My mind is empty and all I can think about is the girl watching me and how I want to spend every one of the minutes I have left, with her, right here in this bed. Or anywhere else she wants to be.
It's when I have that thought that I realize that's all she needs to know – that's the only important thing here.
I hold the box behind her in one hand and rub her hip with the other.
"You know I love you, right?" I start. She nods slowly. The room has been growing slowly brighter and her face is easier to see now. "And you know I would do anything for you?" She nods again, forehead wrinkling.
I grip her hip reassuringly, not wanting her to worry, as I fumble the ring out of the box behind her back. The ring is tiny in my hand but the significance of what it represents makes it feel as if it weighs ten pounds. I take a deep breath, my eyes not leaving Bella's.
She's watching me cautiously, aware something is up. I've never been one for big declarations and I know that if I were her, I'd be wondering what the hell is going on.
I move the hand holding the ring, closed inside my fist, in between us.
"I-" My voice cracks without warning and I stop and clear my throat. Bella frowns as she puts her hand on my fist and rubs it gently with her thumb. I try again, hoping I can get through this without embarrassing myself much further. "I want to make sure you never forget those things."
I flip my hand under hers and open it up. As I raise my hand slightly, bringing hers with it, her fingers drop against my palm and one of them grazes the ring. She shifts her focus from my face to our hands.
Her expression changes the moment she realizes what I'm holding. The crease between her eyes smoothes out as her eyebrows rise and her eyes widen. She brushes her fingertips lightly over the ring before looking back to me.
I have wondered what this moment would be like, if she would do the hands-over-the-mouth thing or cry, or maybe just stare blankly at me. I think I can handle anything but laughter.
As she returns her gaze to mine, she graces me with an expression better than anything I had imagined. There are tears gathering in her lower lashes but at the same time, she has broken into a wide smile that might be bright enough to light the room.
"Jasper." The whisper of her voice contradicts the excitement shining on her face. I release her hip and pick up the ring from my palm, afraid I'll drop it if I try to maneuver it with only the hand that was holding it. I am already knee-deep in the most inelegant proposal of all time; I don't need to make it worse by fumbling the ring.
I hold it up in front of her, between my thumb and index finger. She grips my arm, her thin fingers wrapping tightly around my wrist.
"Babe." When she exhales a tiny, breathless giggle, a single tear toppling to her cheek, I chuckle and try again. "Isabella. I want to be with you always." I pause as she inhales deeply. She's starting to blink rapidly and more tears are joining that first one. Her smile, however, has not wavered. I twist the hand not holding the ring so that we're palm to palm and then push my fingers between hers. She squeezes my hand and wrist tightly and I take it as encouragement to continue with those final words.
"Will you marry me?"
There is no hesitation in her response. She simultaneously nods and gasps out, "Yes, Jasper, yes."
The tears I had expected are falling steadily now and I want to wipe them from her cheeks but am loathe to break the circle she has created by holding on to me. I can feel my face breaking into a smile that matches hers and I think that maybe, as simple as my words were, and as unexpected as this moment is, that I had managed to find the perfect time after all.
We stare at each other for a long moment before her fingers tighten around mine and capture my attention. I pull my fingers away from hers but am careful to hold onto one of them as I release the rest.
I had surreptitiously borrowed a ring Renée gave her last year, which Bella never wears because it only fits on her left ring finger, so I'm not worried the ring isn't the right size. Yet, in the second before I slip the ring over her fingertip, nerves twist my gut.
They dissipate as quickly as they came as I slide the ring down her finger until it's in place. I draw my fingers gently back up hers before letting go and settlings my hands on her thighs.
Much as Emmett had done yesterday, she tips her hand to examine the ring. I watch her carefully, waiting for an indication of how she feels about it.
The ring is very simple, and after spending ninety minutes with a salesperson, I have the vocabulary to describe it: a princess-cut solitaire on a platinum band in a cathedral setting. The stone isn't much bigger than a carat and it's a far cry from the flashier rings my mom and Rose wear, but when I see it on her hand, I know that my instinct was right: it's perfectly Bella.
"It's..." She trails off as she continues to study the ring. Her right hand is now on my stomach, just above where she's sitting, and she's absently rubbing my bare skin. "I love it," she whispers, looking at me over her hand. "I love you."
She drops her hand and leans forward at the same time I reach up to pull her down to me. Our lips meet and I can taste the salt of her tears on my tongue. Her arms slip around my neck as I encircle her with mine and we hold one another as close as possible.
Goose bumps raise her skin as I slip my hands up the back of her shirt. We roll over, my body covering hers, and our kissing intensifies, accompanied by small groans and eager hands.
"I love you so much," I breathe. She nods and presses her head into the pillow, her lips a tight line as I explore her long neck with my mouth.
I lift myself so I can undo the buttons of her shirt and push the two sides apart. Skin-to-skin contact with her has grounded me for three and a half years; I crave it when she's not near and have to take advantage of it now. I trace her curves, caressing and worshipping as I move my hand across her breasts, over her stomach, between her legs. Her panties slide easily down her hips and legs while she tugs the knot from my pants; I discard both pieces of clothing before settling over her again.
The moment I enter her has never lost power over the years. Every time is as meaningful as the last, whether we're joining out of heated lust or something deeper, because it's never just simple need with her. It never has been; it has always been more.
We move together slowly at first, her hands roaming my back and tangling in my hair. Our breathing and speed increase and we roll to our sides, her leg over my hip holding me to her. At this angle, I can slip a hand between our bodies and help her feel what I'm feeling as I move within her: the slow-building swell of pleasure.
Minutes later, she's crying out and arching back, her body tightening all around me. She digs her fingers into my shoulders and I'm not far behind. I pull her so our chests are flush, wanting her damp skin against mine while I breathe against her mouth.
This close to her, I want to say things filled with meaning and import but all I can do is hold her tightly while I shudder and still against her and hope that my touches against her skin convey what I feel.
She rests against me while we catch our breath, and then slides out of bed. "Be right back." Her see-you-in-a-moment kiss is heated and I'm tempted to pull her right back down on top of me. She tugs herself from my grasp with a little smirk, and then disappears from the room.
She's back in bed a few minutes later with a cup of cocoa for us to share, nestling herself under the covers and into my side. The hand with the ring rests on my chest and we both stare at it as we relax and enjoy the tranquil air and muffled sounds of life as the world outside wakes up.
"I can't believe you did that."
"Which part? The asinine in-bed proposal?"
She looks up at me and rolls her eyes. "No, although the location is going to make it difficult to share the whole story with the family." I grin as I imagine how brightly she'll blush anytime someone asks how we got engaged. "I meant the surprise of it. I really didn't see it coming."
"No?" She shakes her head. "I hope it was a good surprise."
"Yes, it was a good surprise." She kisses my chest and hands me the cocoa to put down. I wrap my arm more tightly around her shoulders and watch as she slowly twists the ring around her finger.
"I'll have to call Angela and Renée later," she says a few minutes later. "They're both going to be excited. Oh!" She suddenly stiffens against my body and I pull back so I can see her whole face. "And Charlie!" She's wide-eyed and I have to chuckle.
"Don't worry, he's expecting you."
She props herself up on her elbow. "What do you mean? He knows? But I thought-"
"He didn't know it would be today, but he knew it was coming." She arches an eyebrow and waits. "I talked to him last month, when we were in Forks for Christmas."
"Oh." She purses her lips, head tilting in a move that is eerily similar to what Charlie had done. "I bet that was an interesting conversation. What did he say?"
Charlie still isn't my biggest fan, although our relationship has improved considerably from the silent glares and disapproving head shakes it used to be. I had asked for a moment of his time while Bella was occupied on the phone with Renée, and we'd stepped out onto their porch.
"He was very... Charlie about the whole thing, and offered up two bits of advice." She nods, eyes slowly lighting with amusement. "'Don't rush' and 'keep it simple.'"
She looks relieved and exhales. "Yeah, that sounds about right. And those are good things, babe." Her lips meet mine as she stretches to kiss me and I can feel her smiling. "So," she says as she pulls back, "what are we going to do with the rest of the day, Mr. Hale? We still have those fifteen hours to occupy."
"Well, Ms. Sw-" I break off as something occurs to me. She's watching me and catches the uncertainly that I feel wrinkle my forehead.
"Hey, no frowning today."
"Oh, I was just wondering..."
"Wondering what?" She runs her hand through my hair, her fingertips working their calming magic.
"Are you going to take 'Hale'? We've never talked about it."
She looks surprised. "Why wouldn't I?"
I shrug, my shoulders rising against the pillow behind me. "My sister almost didn't take 'Cullen.'"
"Well," she says, fingers twirling through my hair, tugging gently, "that's your sister, not me."
"Didn't she think about hyphenating? I don't even know what changed her mind."
"I think she was worried about too many Ls."
I blink a couple of times. "What?"
"Rosalie Lillian Hale-Cullen." She emphasizes all of them as she says it.
"That is a lot of Ls." And it's definitely something that Rose would consider.
"Oh, I don't know. I don't think you can ever have too many Ls."
I think about it and let it roll around in my head before letting it out. "Bella Hale... That's not too bad, huh?"
"No," she says, laughing as she leans into me for another kiss. "It's not too bad. In fact, it's perfect."
Perfect.
It's not a word that has often been used to describe my life, but right now, it does.
It's perfect.
I have posted a handful of FitV-Canon pieces in my "Twilight Twenty-Five" entries: "Soft," "Platonic," "Raindrops," and "Crusade." And "Sky" is FitV-AU (aka "FitV-Nightmare").
Whether or not I could ever live up to JA's expectations is debatable; hopefully this is in the ballpark. First thanks goes to her for being so generous. I was honored to have the opportunity to help Stacie in this way.
Legna betaed, encouraged, and said things that made me happy and relieved. I really miss doing FitV stuff with her, so this was nice. She'll always be my L.
LaViePastiche listened to me bitch and moan through two solid weeks of the worst writer's block I've ever had, and then forced me to just write just as I was about to throw myself off a cliff.
AngstGoddess003 made me a super-duper banner to go with this (using a pic LVP found that helped with aforementioned writer's block) – I posted it in my T'ed thread.
A whole bunch of really fabulous fics came out of September's auction. Two to note: americnxidiot's second epilogue for "Beautiful Beat" and inabluebathrobe's "Wings." Both make me cry, in the best possible way.
And last but not least, the generosity of this fandom astonishes me. We raised over $20k during Support Stacie, and right now, Ninapolitan, tbynumbers, and LolaShoes are organizing another auction to support Alex's Lemonade Stand, a foundation that fights childhood cancer. You can find information about that at thefandomgivesback(dot)com.
Thanks for reading, everyone :)