Disclaimer: I obviously do not own Yami no Matsuei, thank you very much.

That's What Love Is For

He awoke without any injuries, without any pain, and without any echoing feeling of loss.

"Shh, it's okay. I'm right here; I'm safe. Go on and rest, little 'Soka."

Tsuzuki sounded tired. How many times, Hisoka wondered, had he said such things? How many times had Hisoka begun to jerk and writhe, only to be called back from the nightmares? He felt guilty just at the thought, then happy, then embarrassed. When, exactly, had Tsuzuki begun to call him 'little 'Soka'?

"Tsuzuki," Hisoka said sleepily, to let the man know that this time he really was awake.

"Hisoka – you're awake? Oh, thank God." And Tsuzuki entered his vision. "How do you feel?"

He took inventory. He wasn't injured, and he no longer felt like he was going to collapse if he breathed heavily. "Much better," he told Tsuzuki, who seemed wholly relieved to hear the report. "How long have I been asleep?"

"Ah – over twenty-four hours." He heard the sound of what was definitely a book hitting the floor. The hard thunk made his brain rattle.

"What?" he gasped. "That long?"

"Mm," Tsuzuki confirmed. "And it's odd, 'Soka – every four hours, on the dot, you started to dream."

Weird. He laid a hand over his eyes and sighed. "I'm sorry – you couldn't have gotten much rest."

"It's fine. I just had to wake up for a few minutes, then I could go back to sleep. I may not get a completely restful night, but... I haven't been able to get one for a while now, anyway." And then there was that weird Feeling again, the Feel of contentment laced with concern. Hisoka peeked out from underneath his arm to see Tsuzuki's expression. As he thought, there was a slight smile on the man's face. "In the end, Hisoka, I feel a lot better, being able to stay with you and call away the nightmares. It's much better than trying to sleep in my room and worrying about how you're doing."

That small smile was looking away, towards the kitchen – no, past that, out of Hisoka's apartment and probably over to his own, where he'd probably tossed and turned in his worry. It made Hisoka feel even guiltier.

"I'm hungry," Hisoka grumbled, pushing himself up into a sitting position and rubbing his eyes. "Are you?" He knew without a doubt that Tsuzuki hadn't left him the entire time he'd slept, which meant that Tsuzuki would definitely be hungry.

"Yeah." Tsuzuki turned that smile on him. Ah. Unfair.

"Then let's eat. Hey," he said as he stood, turning to Tsuzuki. "Let's order something. Do you think Wakaba would mind if we asked her to..?" He was thinking, of course, of Tsuzuki's insatiable appetite for sweets.

Tsuzuki shook his head vehemently. "Mm-mn! She wouldn't mind at all! Although he might..." he mumbled, and he started grumbling about Terazuma.

"He'll get over it," Hisoka said negligibly. "It's for me, after all. Oh, and, um... thank you. For..." He blushed again. When he'd woken up, he hadn't been wrapped around Tsuzuki like a leech anymore, but that was probably because Tsuzuki had been reading. What had he been reading? He turned to ask, but he saw Othello lying haphazardly on the floor and just sighed. While he was getting the new painting, he should also get a couple new books.

"Hisoka, you shouldn't be up," Tsuzuki started, but this time he was interrupted by a knock on the door.

Hisoka's eyebrow twitched. Sure. The visiting began now. When he was beginning to make progress.

...Progress in what, exactly?

He moved out of the bedroom as Tsuzuki scrambled out of the bed. "Hisoka!" Tsuzuki called, clearly exasperated.

But Hisoka was already at the door and opening it. Watari and Tatsumi both stood before his entrance, Watari waving enthusiastically and Tatsumi serious, as usual. A quick delve into emotions showed Watari's feelings easily enough – concern and relief, most likely to see him walking around under his own willpower and not leaning heavily on the door – which he would have been doing just yesterday... well, the day before yesterday, actually. But Tatsumi, as usual, was a complete blank.

"Kurosaki," Tatsumi said, nodding his head.

"Hiya, boyo!" Watari said, completely offsetting the mood Tatsumi just created. Watari just charged right into the house. "Oi, boyo, I've told you about decorating, haven't I?" Watari said, looking around. "Oh, well – it's perfect! I can just give you my brand-new, fantastic little invention that I call-"

"That's fine," Hisoka sighed, fighting a smile. "I've already decided to redecorate."

Watari paused mid-rant, shocked. "You? You decided to fix up this place? Ah, boyo, you really are sick, aren't you? How bad is it? Do you have a temperature?" And Watari put a hand on his forehead.

"Watari," Hisoka growled.

"Watari, please stop," Tsuzuki said, stumbling into the room. Hisoka noted that Tsuzuki had taken the chance to get his hair in some semblance of order so that it wasn't immediately obvious that the two of them had slept together.

Hisoka stared at the floor and blushed.

"Ah, Tsuzuki, you're here, too. Perfect. I came to check on what you told me yesterday."

"And I tagged along to check on the boyo!" Watari chirped, his hand whipping into the air. Little 003 flew off his shoulder and began circling madly above his head. Hisoka let himself lean back onto the wall. Though Watari's very existence in a room was tiring, the man had this aura around him that exuded, if not tranquility, then definitely togetherness. It never failed to raise Hisoka's spirits.

Tatsumi just sighed and stepped around him. "Is there somewhere where we can all talk?"

Hisoka nodded. "The kitchen." And he led everyone there.

Once everyone was seated, 003 calmed down enough to sit back down on Watari's shoulder again. Tatsumi leaned forward onto the table, wasting no time, and crossed his hands in front of him. "Hisoka. You say you've seen Muraki in your dreams?"

Hisoka shook his head, blushing now for a wholly different reason. "No, I don't see him, per se. I hear him."

"Hear him?" Tatsumi echoed.

"Yes." He sighed and leaned back, trying to bring back the length of the table between them. Tatsumi, across from him, looked perturbed. Tsuzuki, on his right, looked unsettled, and Watari mirrored the image.

"And you believe he can see what you do?"

"I think so. He arrived during our search for Amara, and then he found us at the hotel on our last mission."

Hm." Tatsumi crossed his arms and leaned back, as well. "The circumstances certainly don't look promising."

Tsuzuki leaned forward then, putting his hands on the table. "But Tatsumi, how's that possible? I mean, they're just nightmares, right? Albeit bad ones, but still..."

Tatsumi just hummed in thought. Watari turned to Hisoka. "But if he can somehow see through you in your dreams, or at least follow your dreams' events in some way, how could he see you through your waking hours, too? Has he ever 'spoken' to you during the times you weren't dreaming?"

Surprised, Hisoka shook his head. "No. I don't remember that ever happening."

"Hm." And he crossed his arms and thought in silence, too.

It took maybe another two seconds for the silence to get oppressive. Hisoka scooted back his chair and stood. "I'll go get some tea," he said, and moved over to the stove.

"Ah – I'll help, 'Soka." And with another short screech, Tsuzuki stood and followed him.

So Tsuzuki got out the tray and cups while Hisoka grabbed the teapot and filled it and set it to boil. Then Tsuzuki pulled out the teabags and they were left to wait in silence.

"Hisoka, I'm sure everything will be all right," Tsuzuki said quietly, but Hisoka could Feel his uncertainty. He nodded to acknowledge he'd heard but didn't say anything. Tsuzuki just sighed. When the teapot whistled, neither jumped, both all too willing to finish up and return to Tatsumi and Watari and find out what they were thinking. And escape the odd atmosphere of the room all the sooner.

When they returned to the table, Tatsumi was still in the same position he'd been in before, his brows now furrowed. Watari was cooing to 003 and playing with the owlet's beak. "Ah, boyo, you're back. Great. Thanks," he said, accepting his tea.

"Thank you," Tatsumi said, much more solemn, when Hisoka gave him his tea. Hisoka felt a small fluttering of panic. Then when everyone's tea was placed on the table, Tsuzuki took the tray back to the counter.

"Kurosaki, Watari has a theory."

A theory?

Hisoka turned to Watari, and the blond left off fooling around with 003. "Ah, I'll wait until Tsuzuki comes back." And they did, just sitting and playing with their cups, waiting for it to cool a bit, until Tsuzuki returned and sat in his seat. "Now then. I've thought about what you said, boyo. About how Muraki only speaks during the dream?"

"Yes." Hisoka tensed, waiting for the worst.

"Well," he said slowly, "did you ever think that maybe the dreams are... a curse of some sort?"

Somehow it was worse than Hisoka had thought. Still, he had to sigh in relief. "So you don't think he's seen Meifu in any way?"

"No," Tatsumi said. "But this is just as, if not more, serious. You may be in danger, Kurosaki."

Hisoka Felt a painful warp of emotions from both Tsuzuki and, oddly enough, Tatsumi, before they were carefully tamped down. "You mean to say," Tsuzuki said quietly, "that Hisoka may have been cursed by Muraki – again? Why? What has Muraki to gain from this?"

"I don't know that one," Watari said. "Maybe... boyo, when did these nightmares begin?"

"After getting Tsuzuki back from Muraki," Hisoka said promptly. That one was an easy question to answer. "I know for certain, because I thought at first that it was just a reaction from... from the events of that day."

Tsuzuki winced.

"But then they got worse instead of better, and I heard Muraki speak to me during the dream. That's when I started to consider the conclusion I told Tsuzuki." He carefully judged the temperature of his tea with his hands, then took a cautious sip.

"Then maybe it had been planned for Tsuzuki?" Watari said, speaking more to himself than the others in the room.

"For Tsuzuki?" Hisoka repeated, almost dropping his cup. He carefully put it back down. "What do you mean? Muraki had wanted Tsuzuki to have these nightmares? But how could they affect Tsuzuki?"

"Maybe the content wasn't set in stone; just the theory behind it. The dream, it involves Tsuzuki's death, right?" At Hisoka's careful nod, Watari continued. "Then maybe it's supposed to exploit a fear of the dreamer."

Hisoka wanted to ask why it wasn't of that night he'd met Muraki, but he thought he already had the answer to that: because the fear of losing Tsuzuki was greater than anything else. "Then why did it get me?" he asked, letting the earlier question slide.

"I don't know, boyo," Watari sighed. "I'm at the limit of my genius. Maybe if I studied it a bit more... what happens in the dreams?"

And Hisoka clammed up.

After an awkward silence, Tsuzuki spoke up. "It's just about that night, Watari," he said quietly.

Watari seemed to understand that he'd stepped into uninhabitable territory and gracefully backed out. "Well, I'll think about it and see if I can come up with anything, okay?"

Hisoka nodded, grateful. "I'd be in your debt."

"Save it," Watari said, waving it away, jostling 003 so that the little guy had to flap his wings to keep his balance. Then he took a big slurp of his tea and smacked his lips. "I swear you have the best tea in Meifu, boyo." The blond winked.

Hisoka looked over at Tatsumi, who, unlike Watari, was drinking his tea properly, and shook his head. He highly doubted that he had the best tea, considering.

Then they got into mundane chatter for a time; Watari and Tsuzuki discussed a new dessert that Wakaba had found, and Tsuzuki pleaded with Hisoka to allow him to get the dessert when they ordered their meal. Tatsumi teased Tsuzuki about his eating habits, eliciting the usual puppy-dog response from Tsuzuki. Hisoka just leaned back and sipped his tea and allowed himself to relax in the still-odd feeling of camaraderie that filled his apartment to the brim.

It felt strange, but it felt good. He wouldn't let this feeling go, no matter what. It took him until death, but he finally found a place where he felt he could belong, with friends that worried about him to the point of visiting him at his place.

And someone even more special than that.

No. Muraki wouldn't take this place from him. He wouldn't let it happen.

"Hisoka, you're in no shape to... Hisoka! Stop!" Tsuzuki tried to grab his shinai as he arched it down, but Hisoka managed to dodge Tsuzuki's hand and stepped to the side.

It was a bit difficult to do his forms inside the house, so he'd sneaked out while Tsuzuki was in the bathroom, more for fun than for anything else. Tsuzuki had predictably followed, and he'd predictably freaked out. Hisoka was tired from just the couple of minutes of exercising, but it felt good to be doing something. Especially after the resolve he'd felt during his time with Watari and Tatsumi.

"Hisoka, one night of rest doesn't make up for everything you've lost!" Tsuzuki snapped.

Ignoring him and grinning widely internally, he threw his shinai at Tsuzuki's head. He stopped just before he hit his partner. Tsuzuki blinked at him in surprise.

"Spar with me."

Tsuzuki just blinked at him again, seemingly unable to understand the words that had come out of Hisoka's mouth. "What?"

"Spar with me," he repeated, slower, as if speaking to someone who had yet to learn the language. And he thrust his shinai at Tsuzuki.

Tsuzuki dodged more from some sort of habit than in cooperation. "Hisoka, what are you doing? You're still recovering!"

"Then hurry up and spar with me!" Hisoka suggested, running after his partner. Tsuzuki was lithe and graceful, despite how clunky he acted, and he managed to dodge all of Hisoka's attacks. It was better, a thousand times better than simply practicing his katas; he was able to actually fight someone, be it mock or not. He struggled to land a hit as Tsuzuki just moved around in an odd pattern.

"Hisoka," Tsuzuki tried again, then stopped and hopped to the right.

It was exhilarating. Moreover, it was fun. It was almost like playing. He felt his lips pull up in a small smile and turned it feral, aiming for Tsuzuki's stomach, trusting his partner to dodge.

Tsuzuki didn't disappoint, twirling over to the right again and stopping by Hisoka's side. He lifted a finger to Hisoka's waist, a sign of impending victory.

Hisoka dropped into a quick crouch and swung his shinai across, going for Tsuzuki's knees. The man simply jumped over Hisoka's sword and reached forward again. Hisoka had to roll back to avoid him that time.

When he hopped back to his feet, Tsuzuki was grinning, too, and was launching himself forward.

When Tsuzuki grabbed his shinai, he simply pushed himself off of it and launched himself back and then simply charged forward again. Though Hisoka could tell that Tsuzuki was holding himself back a bit, he couldn't help the delighted laugh when he managed a glancing blow on his partner's shoulder just as Tsuzuki was once again dodging to the right. Tsuzuki's eyes glinted oddly, his smile widening, and he was suddenly sliding under Hisoka's shinai and was right in front of him, Hisoka's swing still continuing to the side, and Tsuzuki simply touched Hisoka's forehead.

"I win," the violet-eyed Shinigami said, that odd glint to his eyes telling of something more than just victory.

"I'll get you next time," Hisoka assured him.

"Uh-huh." There seemed to be an interesting amount of sarcasm in that. "Come on, let's get you back up to your room; you're sweaty and shivering and this couldn't have been good for you."

"I'm fine," Hisoka said, readjusting his grip on the handle of his shinai. It was a good thing, though, that they'd fought in the safety of the open field behind the apartment buildings, or else he'd have been in trouble. Tsuzuki just huffed a sigh and turned to the buildings, leaving Hisoka to trail along after him.

It took only half a step for Hisoka to realize that he wasn't as fine as he'd thought.

And about a quarter of a second to smash face-first into the ground.

"Hisoka!" Tsuzuki yelped, turning and immediately grabbing Hisoka up. Hisoka leaned a hand on Tsuzuki's shoulder and took a few deep breaths. He hadn't really felt it before, but he wasn't shivering so much as trembling. Had he overexerted himself? Ah, but if he admitted that, Tsuzuki would chain him to his bed.

"I'm fine; it's nothing, just a little dizzy." Yeah, like that wouldn't put Tsuzuki into mother-hen mode. "Thanks for practicing with me," he said, quickly changing the subject.

Tsuzuki just sighed and pulled Hisoka closer, until the taller man's hands could easily wrap around Hisoka and help him stay on his feet as they made their way back to Hisoka's room. "Of course I did; I wouldn't just stand there watching you hurt yourself, and I wasn't going to leave, and for a minute it was fun..." And Tsuzuki just rattled away while they made their way into the building and up to Hisoka's floor. And when they got there, Hisoka finally pushed away from Tsuzuki and pulled his key out, letting the both of them back inside. Then he placed his shinai in its corner and went to the bathroom.

"Hisoka, what are you doing?"

"Taking a quick shower," he answered, and watched Tsuzuki's mother-hen hands drop to his sides.

"And then you're going to bed," Tsuzuki said firmly.

Hisoka blatantly ignored him, firmly shutting the bathroom door behind him.

It took him a minute to decide to get his butt in gear and strip. He really was tired, but he felt refreshed, better than he had for quite a while, and it had been wonderful – ugh, such a girly word – to spar with Tsuzuki. He'd felt like laughing.

It took him until he had the water running to remember that he actually had laughed.

"Oh, shit," he whispered, and just stood there in a crouch as the water heated on his fingers.

He'd laughed. He'd completely forgotten himself and laughed. Like a kid. Like a schoolboy. Like Tsuzuki when he watched 003 do a new trick. Like someone who hadn't been raped and cursed at age thirteen. No, more – like someone who hadn't been plagued his entire life by Feeling other people's scorn and hatred.

How? It was such a strange thing, such an odd occurrence, it should have just slammed into him like a ton of bricks and knocked him on his ass. It should have sent his mind spinning. He'd laughed.

But, he considered as he turned on the shower and felt the hot spray hit his weary muscles, maybe it was because he and Tsuzuki had been alone back there. And Tsuzuki, once he'd let his guard down and had stopped obsessing over Hisoka's health, had been filled with emotions that had not only matched Hisoka's but somehow fed them – Tsuzuki's light competitiveness, his excitement, his happiness, his frivolous cheer... it had all made Hisoka feel light and cheery, too, like they were two friends playing a game of catch, or a pair of...

He stood straight, eyes wide. Had he been thinking 'a pair of lovers on a date'? Oh, shit. He couldn't let himself think like that – it hurt too much, it wasn't safe. Tsuzuki was his partner, his best friend, his confidante. The person he trusted more than anyone else. And he could Feel, sometimes, those exact same emotions in Tsuzuki. But for Tsuzuki, love was such a freely given emotion that it mixed too easily with deep companionship. Hisoka could Feel those same damn emotions coming off of Tsuzuki when the man turned to Tatsumi, and even similarly when he looked at Watari or Wakaba. Hisoka didn't rise above them in any way emotionally; he was the exact same.

Hisoka snatched the soap and determinedly pushed away that damn errant thought of the two of them standing under the sakura trees and not just acting out the role of partners against a foe. Erased the image of them holding hands. He wasn't a freaking romantic, anyway, so why did these pictures always crop up unbidden in his head? Tsuzuki would probably freak out if he learned what Hisoka was thinking.

He lathered his hands and put the soap back. He didn't care enough just then to use a washcloth – he just needed something to do with himself. "Tsuzuki is just a friend," he whispered to himself, so low he couldn't even hear it, just in case Tsuzuki was listening to make sure he hadn't passed out or something. The words strung together easily now. They'd become his mantra.

Tsuzuki is just a friend. Tsuzuki is just a friend.

He wanted a lot more than that.

Ah, stupid, stupid! He scowled at the wall and just fucking well dropped it. It didn't matter, anyway... whether he wanted more or not, it was Tsuzuki's decision. And, Hisoka thought with a dry chuckle, Tsuzuki was far too indecisive to choose something that important.

"Hisoka, why aren't you sleeping?"

Because, Hisoka wanted to answer petulantly, huddling a bit more under the covers, I'd been too tired to notice before, but you smell really, really good. And Tsuzuki had unconsciously pulled Hisoka into his chest, so the smell was freaking everywhere. And so was the heat from Tsuzuki's skin, and the feel of Tsuzuki's arm was both rigid and smooth at the same time, and Hisoka was far, far too aware of it.

That was why.

Hisoka just mumbled something unintelligible and carefully kept his eyes closed.

Tsuzuki was oblivious, of course, and just pulled Hisoka in a little tighter. "Don't worry, I'll be here the entire time. I won't let the nightmares take you..."

It wasn't the right reason, and it didn't take away any of the many distractions that Tsuzuki's body was offering, but somehow nonetheless Tsuzuki's voice calmed him and he finally, finally managed to drift to sleep.

It was odd, he thought, to have a normal dream, or at least a more normal dream. One where he didn't have to worry about fire or death or an injury that would remain when he awakened. This dream was strange and special in its own way, because he'd never had anything like it before.

He was on a bed, and Tsuzuki was with him. For a moment he thought it was real life, because they were definitely in his room, but the light was glowing strangely and Tsuzuki was leaning over him.

And then Tsuzuki's lips were on his, and he felt an odd warmth taking over his entire body. He jerked at it, at the almost-too-hot feel of it, as Tsuzuki's hands slipped down his body and pulled up his shirt.

"Wha-"

"Shh." And Tsuzuki pulled it over his head and kissed him again, a deep, heated kiss that somehow tasted of Tsuzuki's scent, and Tsuzuki pulled back and began traveling down his neck, licking the pulse beating just there on the side, and he gasped.

Tsuzuki's hands were gentle, ever so gentle, as they played across Hisoka's nipples. The heat inside him turned to a raging fire, a painful volcano that centered at his groin, and then he felt himself harden. He groaned.

It was strange to feel Tsuzuki's lips take over where his fingers left off; it felt nothing at all like Muraki, or like Dream-Tsuzuki. And when Tsuzuki's hands dipped lower, catching in his jeans, playing idly with the button, he reacted wholly differently than he had with those other two – he lifted his hips and bucked, moaning again.

And Tsuzuki chuckled a breathy laugh. "All right," he whispered, and one of those hands reached inside his jeans until-

"Hisoka, wake up!"

He flinched awake and groaned. He felt warm, almost hot, and uncomfortable. He groaned again and let his eyes slit open.

Tsuzuki leaned over top of him, looking down with worried amethyst eyes.

He jerked backwards into the mattress. "What the hell?" he grumbled.

"I don't know," Tsuzuki confessed. "You were moaning and mumbling in your sleep. Were you having the dream again?"

Hisoka blushed to his roots, then even harder when he realized he was uncomfortable because he was hard. "Ah... uhm..." He shook his head. "No, it was... a normal dream..."

Tsuzuki made a surprised little 'oh' sound and pushed himself back onto his haunches. "Sorry, I didn't know."

"No, it's fine," Hisoka mumbled, but he found he had to get the fuck up and get rid of his little problem. He was damned if he'd let Tsuzuki see it.

"Hisoka?" Tsuzuki's gaze followed him out of the bed.

"I have to go to the bathroom," he lied, and shuffled as quickly as he could without arousing suspicion until he was finally safe in the bathroom. Sanctuary.

He did end up going to the bathroom afterward, if only to lend credence to his lie. But it left him a bit too open to thought, and his mind wanted to replay the scene in his head a little too vividly. Shit. And he'd told himself to just drop the damn subject.

Still... still, it was so odd, almost scary, that he'd had such a dream. It was his first, wasn't it? He couldn't remember ever having one before. And it was about Tsuzuki... he groaned a little before managing to cut off the noise. Shit, shit, shit.

But a part of him was relieved. A tiny, sort of insecure part of him had been terrified that he'd lost that ability after... after Muraki, and he would never get the chance to experience that sort of pleasure, even if Tsuzuki reciprocated his feelings. So mixed in with the acute horror was a sense of relief and... and almost of accomplishment. Did that dream mean he was moving forward, out of the clutches of Muraki's control? Did the dream signify his sense of freedom from the cursed life placed on him?

Or was it just a teenager's overactive libido?

That almost shocked a laugh out of him, and made him wonder: if he was going to continually stay in this exact form, did that mean that he would have a teenager's libido forever?

The laugh that wanted to escape then almost seemed a bit... hysterical, so he just swallowed it back and flushed the toilet, rearranging his boxers and pajamas – Tsuzuki had made him change into something more 'cozy' than the simple slacks he'd been willing to don.

He washed his hands then and just let the water play over his palms for a minute. The fact remained, in the end, that he'd dreamed about Tsuzuki in an extremely intimate – he almost snorted at the understatement – position, and he had to return to the bed and act as if nothing had happened. As if he hadn't imagined those slender fingers pressing down on his-

He blushed. Oh, hell.

Tsuzuki knocked on the bathroom door. "Hisoka, are you sure you're all right? Was it really a normal dream?"

Normal? What was normal? Was it normal to fantasize about your partner pleasuring you? Was it normal to want your partner so badly it made you physically ill? "Of course it was," he said plainly, turning off the water. He dried his hands quickly and opened the door, where Tsuzuki stared down at him, his elbow leaning against the door jamb. Hisoka's heart thudded funnily. With the gray of pre-dawn lighting up Tsuzuki's features from behind, he looked like...

Like a man just awakening from a bout of sex.

Hisoka blushed again. Oh shit. Oh God. Oh so not good.

"Hisoka?"

Oh hell oh hell oh hell. He cleared his throat. "It's nothing, Tsuzuki – let's go back to bed."

Hisoka slid past his partner – who, dammit, had gone to bed in nothing more than slacks, the bastard, which had most certainly not helped Hisoka fall asleep – and sat on the bed, pushing back the covers.

"But Hisoka, if you really did have the dream..."

"I didn't. I wouldn't have woken up so calmly if I had." He carefully did not look over to Tsuzuki, but instead settled down in his bed and pulled the covers up to his chin. Shit. He just realized – they'd gone to sleep in the middle of the day, and it was pre-dawn. Damn.

He couldn't stop the yawn as he sat back up. Tsuzuki raised an eyebrow at the unexpected movement, but both shot up when Hisoka slid out of bed. "Hisoka?"

"Breakfast," he muttered, and trudged over to the kitchen.

"You're hungry?" Tsuzuki seemed to doubt it.

"Hungry enough to keep myself awake," he mumbled, and pulled open a cupboard drawer. "Hope you don't mind cereal – I'm not in the mood to cook."

"It's fine," Tsuzuki said cautiously, obviously feeling the weird mood that had settled over Hisoka.

It was in silence that they both ate, Tsuzuki's worry increasing almost every moment. "I'm fine," Hisoka sighed, fishing around in his bowl for the last few pieces of his American cereal.

"You still seem so tired," Tsuzuki told him, and his concern was so touching it made Hisoka's skin warm. That and Tsuzuki had yet to put on a shirt, and those chest muscles were rippling as he took careful bites of the breakfast Hisoka had bought just for Tsuzuki – some Frosted Flakes thing that promised to have sugar.

"Ah – tired, right. Well, I haven't gotten very much sleep for the past... well, for months." He finished his last bite and carefully sipped the rest of the milk. Tsuzuki was still munching away – of course, he'd gotten a second bowl somewhere in there – so he settled on taking his dish to the sink and cleaning it, simply setting it aside to dry on its own. Tsuzuki shortly came up and did the same with his, and Hisoka suspected the man was trying to silently stay on Hisoka's odd schedule, trying to not make Hisoka stay up just because Tsuzuki was awake. But Tsuzuki had to want to do something other than babysit him sleeping all day.

"I know you haven't gotten a lot of sleep, Hisoka, but does this seem... odd... in any way to you?"

Hisoka thought of his dream and blushed. "What's odd?" he demanded, a bit more rudely than intended.

Tsuzuki was oddly undisturbed by it this time, and Hisoka realized that Tsuzuki was used to him getting defensive when there really was something to worry about. Shit. He hadn't realized Tsuzuki had gotten to that point. "There's tired, Hisoka, and then there's practically comatose."

"Tsuzuki, I've been getting no more than four hours of sleep for a very, very long time." He said it so wearily that for a moment Tsuzuki had absolutely nothing he could say to it. Hisoka slipped past him again, this time returning to the bedroom. Whether Tsuzuki wanted it or not, he had to get some more sleep, and right now.

Gods, if he weren't so damn tired, he'd be pissed about it all.

Hisoka was unsurprised when Tsuzuki came up behind him, silently taking his place under the sheets on the other side. Hisoka allowed himself to appreciate the look of those muscles contracting for only one short second before looking away, blushing so hard it almost seared his face, and got in on his own side.

"We'll do something else next time," he told Tsuzuki, rolling over to show the man his back. "I won't go straight back to sleep next time, okay?"

"...It's fine," Tsuzuki said quietly. Hisoka got a nice, solid taste of Tsuzuki's fear for him and just sighed.

"Good night."

Tsuzuki was silent for so long that Hisoka was practically asleep when he heard Tsuzuki whisper to him, so soft as to be hardly discernible, "please wake up."