Many thanks to those who have reviewed so far, I really appreciate it^^ Caro666, Punk Debutante and IA1979.

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Zack felt a little bit cranky the next morning when he woke up. He looked around the room when he opened his eyes for Sephiroth but his lover was nowhere to be seen. Panicking, he hurried out the room, not knowing what to expect but just knowing the man wasn't there.

What if he went to find…?

Zack quickly shook that thought from his mind after realizing he was suppose to be trying to give Sephiroth the benefit of the doubt, he was suppose to trust him and if he didn't then things would fall apart. He realized the living area was empty before deciding to try the other rooms. There was a sudden clinking sound, something similar to a pot or pan and he darted towards the kitchen, calling out the man's name.

"Sephiroth!" Zack started when he reached the kitchen door.

At the sound of the distress in Zack's voice Sephiroth dropped the pan and walked over before placing a hand reassuringly on Zack's shoulder.

"What happened?" Sephiroth asked concerned.

"Um, Nothing…You're cooking," Zack smiled nervously before walking into the kitchen. He hoped Sephiroth would ignore what had just happened and continue what he was doing.

"Why were you so scared?" Sephiroth asked while watching the hesitant brunet sit around the kitchen table. Zack's eyes were darting around like they did when he was nervous and he kept rubbing his thumbs together nervously.

"I…I just woke up and you weren't there," Zack sighed in admittance. He knew he wasn't a good liar so it was better for him to come clean than try to hide his feelings.

"And why me not being around…..? aah, I see," Sephiroth trailed off after realizing that if Zack thought he was gone he would try to find Cloud.

"I'm sorry," Zack answered to the silent realization.

"Why? You have sufficient reason to believe I might do something again since I haven't given you enough reason not to trust me," Sephiroth said matter of factly.

Zack got off the chair and walked over to his lover, wrapping both arms around his waist and kissing him on the mouth tenderly. "I know I told you that you aren't any different from others Seph, but in some ways you are. The thing is, I understand you and I know you didn't mean to do what you did to us," Zack answered.

"You don't understand…" Sephiroth sighed before tilting his head up to so he could look into those captivating eyes. "…At the time I enjoyed doing it because I thought it was right."

"But once you found out the truth you regretted it, right?"

Sephiroth sighed. It didn't feel right to him that Zack was so accepting of this, that he wasn't throwing a tantrum or not trusting him like he should have under the circumstances. He knew about human nature and how people behave and it puzzled him to no end Zack was so accepting of his flaws.

"Look, we all make mistakes…" Zack started after taking both Sephiroth's hands into his and squeezing tightly. "…And what if I had done what you did? I would want you to forgive me after I found out the truth."

"You wouldn't try to kill me if you thought I cheated," Sephiroth answered.

"Yeah….." Zack chuckled nervously; Sephiroth wasn't pleading his case at all. "…but I know you would and I don't hold it against you since it was a misunderstanding."

Sephiroth understood on some levels and decided to accept it for what it was, Zack really thought highly enough of him to forgive his transgressions. Bringing their bodies close together he started to kiss Zack passionately while holding him tightly, tasting him with his soul along with his tongue. If he didn't know what love was he knew now, all thanks to the man that wasn't afraid to love him unconditionally.

Zack on the other hand wasn't as comfortable as he thought he would be at the idea of having sex with his lover. He just wouldn't be able to see Sephiroth in ecstasy without remembering Cloud in pain, white hot pain that was so clear in those sky blue eyes he felt it down to his core. Needing a distraction he pulled back quickly before looking at Sephiroth questioningly.

"Um, when Cloud left here yesterday…." Zack trailed off and Sephiroth understood. Zack had no idea where Cloud was or if he was alright.

"I arranged a private room for him in the East Wing of the dorms, if he wasn't there his instructor would have told me," Sephiroth answered before pulling back to walk over to the stove once again.

Zack breathed a sigh of relief because he knew Cloud would appreciate a little privacy at the moment. He started playing with his thumbs once again because he was contemplating visiting Cloud, but would he want to see him? After the way they parted he wasn't so sure.

"Something on your mind?" Sephiroth asked while cracking a few eggs into the frying pan. There was bacon and toast on two plates off to the side of the counter with hot steaming mugs close by.

"I was thinking I should pay him a visit," Zack answered.

"I think that's a good idea."

"After breakfast though, I'm starved."

"Coming right up," Sephiroth smiled slightly before forking the scrambled eggs on the two plates and bringing it over to the table so they both could eat.

Zack picked up his fork and was about to take a bite when his cell phone, that was in the pocket of his pants started to ring. He mouthed for Sephiroth to excuse him when he saw it was Kunsel and walked towards the doorway.

"Hey Kunsel, what's up?" Zack greeted after putting the device to his ear and connecting the call. Kunsel was a 2nd Class SOLDIER he had been friends with for a long time.

"No, I'm fine, thanks."

Sephiroth listened while watching Zack and he didn't miss the way he rubbed the back of his head like he normally did when he was lying.

"No, I didn't hear anything about that. Are they sure it was him? I mean…."

There was a pause while Zack listened to what the other had to say. "Who would do that? I'm sure ShinRa is in an uproar right now…"

"Yeah, I'm sure they'll find whoever did it, Professor Hojo was a powerful man after all."

Sephiroth didn't miss the way the man's eyes shut tightly when he mentioned Hojo's name.

"Yeah, I'm fine. No please, my voice is just a little hoarse right now. Thanks, Later Kunsel," Zack finished before pocketing his cell and walking back over to the table.

"They found Hojo's…remains this morning…" Zack tapped his fingers lightly on the table, "…And their planning to launch a full investigation into the circumstances."

"Hn." Sephiroth cocked his head to the side in question. "You seem worried," he stated.

"What if they find out it was you?"

"They need me…and they wouldn't dare go against me" Sephiroth answered nonchalantly.

"Yeah, because you can take ShinRa down with your bare hands," Zack chuckled.

"That too," Sephiroth smiled. The feeling he was feeling now, he was positive if Zack had left him he would have taken ShinRa down regardless. It seemed Zack understood how much he needed him more than he himself ever did.

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The shadow was all around him, suffocating and dark. There was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide and no matter how fast his legs went the darkness was just there, never ending and infinite. Cloud knew he had to get away because something was coming in the dark, something wanted to destroy him inside and out and it pulled at him in the darkness. But no matter how fast, hard or long he ran the feeling got stronger. It was almost suffocating now, whatever was there and he panted harshly because his lungs burned and his muscles hurt. Why was this happening? Bumping into something hard he fell to the floor in a heap, feeling the wind knocked out of him when he hit. Shaking the fog from his mind he looked up, and before he could react to what he saw—a dragon, a silver dragon as big as a mountain with nostrils flaring like an erupting volcano and green eyes so bright he had to shield his eyes. In a fit of anger it came at him hard and fast with a silent promise of torment and hurt.

Cloud screamed.

"STOP!" Cloud started after jumping from his sleep, sweat and fright the only thing he knew at the moment.

"I…" Cloud's hands shakily grabbed the bed sheets and squeezed until his knuckles turned white. He was afraid; felt the fear as clear as day but something else was there. He was feeling something other than what he knew and it scared him because in his mind he was bound to a bed, waiting for a man he thought was his friend to come and hurt him once again, to tear him apart from the inside out and he could feel it building, in his mind and in his body. Someway, somehow he was still trapped in that room, on that bed with that man inside him and his ass throbbed from expectation, his body conditioned to receive while Sephiroth took.

Why?

Sephiroth. He hated the man with such a vile passion he could taste it in his throat, and it tasted like bile. It took him a second to realize he really wanted to gag and he bolted out the room and into the small bathroom, emptying what wasn't in him in the first place into the toilet. He dry heaved for a good five minutes before he felt settled enough to sit on the cold floor and tried to block the images from his mind. Staring at nothing he contemplated a lot of things…leaving, revenge, betrayal, Zack.

What had happened to Zack anyway?

Suddenly there was a knock on the door and Cloud bolted upright, wondering what he should do. What if it was Sephiroth?

"Cloud…"

Cloud's head snapped up at the sound of the muffled voice, a voice he could recognize anywhere and he ran to open the door.

"Zack…" Cloud started after seeing the First, dressed in his uniform standing in his doorway. Zack threw him an awkward smile and as if trying to make sure Zack was really there and he wasn't an hallucination he threw his arms around the man and hugged tightly, releasing a sigh of relief when he realized he really wasn't alone and his only friend who knew what he went through was there.

"Come in, Zack," Cloud instructed after releasing the brunet.

Zack threw Cloud a small smile while walking inside the apartment, happy that he was so well receiving of his presence.

"What happened, how have you been?" Cloud asked anxiously, walking behind Zack until he stood in the middle of the room. The brunet turned around to look at him and he could see there was something on Zack's mind.

"What did Sephiroth do to you?" Cloud asked concerned because he remembered he had left the apartment before the man had returned, and he left Zack there alone.

Sephiroth didn't do anything to me," Zack answered while looking at the blond, everything about the kid fucked up and wrong. His skin was pale and his eyes were dull with small bags underneath them. He wasn't the vibrant kid he knew anymore and it broke his heart.

"Zack, I can't stay here. Every time I hear footsteps outside my blood pressure rises because I think it's him…he's coming to get me," Cloud started in a near frantic voice, hugging himself tightly in the process.

Zack bit the inside of his lip because… what could he say?

"Cloud, Sephiroth really didn't mean to do that to you," Zack started and the wide eyed look Cloud gave him at his words almost made him flinch.

"W…what…?" Cloud asked confused, because he couldn't have heard what he thought Zack had said, had he?

"Cloud…" Zack started and the look in the man's eyes made Cloud realize he was serious…He was here to defend Sephiroth.

"Zack, stop, please," Cloud pleaded, hoping to Gaia he was just jerking him around.

"Cloud, please understand that Sephiroth is different and he's really, really repentant of his actions."

"You want me to…?" Cloud staggered slightly at the implication of what Zack was asking. "You want me to forget this ever happened?"

"No Cloud…" Zack tried to walk over to Cloud but the blond took a step back, not wanting him to touch him at all. "I just want you to get past this and move on, to get over it and continue living your life."

Cloud made a cynical laugh before looking Zack straight in the eyes. "Did you know he enjoyed raping me? He said…he said he could see why you would sleep with me, and at first when I look in his eyes I could see it was all about you, but then after a while it was all about me. He wanted to come back to me Zack, he enjoyed hurting me and you want me to fucking forget?!"

Cloud shook his head as if trying to shake out the images before looking back at Zack, and the crestfallen look he saw on the man's face told him Zack knew exactly what he was talking about.

"You're fucking a rapist…my rapist," Cloud spat, his anger towards Zack building in waves, consuming him. His blue eyes burned with hatred and he knew he shouldn't hurt Zack, but he felt betrayed and used. Zack of all people he wouldn't expect to be telling him anything like this. Zack was supposed to understand and encourage him to hate, not ask him to forgive and forget.

"Cloud…" Zack sighed, not knowing what to say.

"He ran Masamune through your heart Zack and left you to Hojo, how dare you ask this of me," Cloud scoffed, the madness from his eyes seeping into his voice.

"Cloud, I'm not asking you to forget! I'm asking you to not let the hatred consume you and…"

"Get out," Cloud commanded with his left index finger pointing towards the door.

"What?" Zack asked confused.

"I said… get the fuck OUT!" Cloud screamed, his chest heaving from the anger welling up inside him. The Zack he knew must have been replaced by a clone because he knew the real Zack was honorable enough to not put up with this bullshit.

Realizing there was no getting through to the younger man Zack slowly walked towards the door. He figured Cloud might just need some time to cool off before he tried to talk to him again. Stopping by the door with his hand on the handle he turned around, "I'll be around anytime you need a friend, Cloud."

"Anytime I need a friend I'll find one, right now you aren't even close Zack," Cloud spat and he knew his words hurt the other…serves him right for defending Sephiroth.

Zack hung his head before walking out the door and after it was slammed shut behind him. Cloud leaned against the structure before sliding to the floor in a heap. Was he alone in all this? He started sniffling and that's when he realized he was crying…just a few tears rolling down the side of his face. His mind was barely able to process all the wrong going on in his life but by far Zack's was the biggest head breaker. What was the man thinking anyways?

"I swear I hate you all," Cloud muttered to himself before walking back towards his room. He was planning to go back to training that morning but the thing with Zack had drained him both physically and mentally and now all he wanted to do was curl in bed and rest. Forget Zack, forget Sephiroth, forget ShinRa and forget Gaia.

Lying down on the soft mattress of his bed he willed his problems away, trying hard to forget them before sleep consumed him once again.

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Zack didn't feel up to training either and all he felt was melancholy and discomposed. Walking back towards his apartment he didn't notice the extra securities he passed, or the fact that everybody was running around in a frenzy. All that mattered to him was what Cloud had said and how obvious his feelings were. The kid felt betrayed and as much as that wasn't true, when he tried to put himself in Cloud's shoes he could see where all those emotions were coming from.

Cloud was just a child, a young boy who got raped by somebody he once confessed was his hero and his entire reason for coming to Midgar in the first place. And then there was himself, the person who was suppose to be his friend, his only friend in bed with said tainted hero.

It was a bitter-sweet situation because he could never give Sephiroth up, but he didn't want to lose
Cloud either. Was it possible to have his cake and eat it too? He's willing to try.

Walking through the front door of his apartment Zack was greeted by the sight of Sephiroth reclined on the couch reading a book and he smiled a small smile. He really cared for the man a lot and if forced to choose he didn't know what he would do.

"It went bad I take it?" Sephiroth suddenly asked, breaking him out of his thoughts and Zack sighed before walking over to him and sitting down, placing his head on the man's shoulder before feeling him hug him across his back until his hand rested on his side.

"Yeah, he was really hurt," Zack answered sadly.

"He at least is predictable," Sephiroth said.

Zack arched an eyebrow in question, "What's that suppose to mean?"

"It means I didn't expect him to behave differently. I can imagine all the inner turmoil he's going through and it won't be easily amendable. He believes if you're not with him you're obviously against him, even if that isn't the case," Sephiroth said calmly.

Zack agreed. He was only trying to help when Cloud went batshit crazy on him, but at least he was venting. He just hoped it didn't affect him too much in his duties later on because he'd hate to it affect his stay in ShinRa.

Both men sat lost in their own thoughts, wondering what the future had in store for them all.