A/N: I know it's been an eternity since I've updated this. But so much has happened! I've been to Paris and had an interesting encounter with some sort of Fantome de L'Opera. Whether or not it was poor, unhappy Erik, who can tell? But I like to think it was. Having been to the Opera Garnier, it makes me feel all the more blessed to love the story of the Phantom.
Thanks to all who have or will review in future.
K.S.
While the Moon her Watch is Keeping
She brought the house down. There was not a dry eye in the house. I would wager that even Carlotta wept. Tears of pure agitation. One day that woman shall die of apoplexy. I sincerely hope that I have a hand in it. I would have paid some of my carefully hoarded francs to see her fit of pique. But who cares, really, about La Carlotta?
When there is La Daae to adore?
I hurried to the chapel, waiting for her, seeing her slim form still clad in that iridescent meringue of a gown. Spangled with stars, she had seemed the angel she thought me to be. Her hair held the candlelight, gilding it to the rich color of exotic mahogany wood, picking out the lights of gold and auburn in her curls. Oh to be one of those little stars, nestling in her hair! If I thought her an Angel before, now she has transcended that title. She is a goddess. Aphrodite, Venus, Arianrhod, Isis, Brigid, Freya... all the most beautiful goddesses in all the world, names that fall from my mouth like jewels- they all pale in comparison with the Goddess of Music- Christine Daae. Her very name is a prayer upon my lips. Oh, she is so beautiful! And everything that is good and beautiful in this world, she is all that. Yet even here, in this sanctuary, she is beset. But I cannot begrudge Little Meg her best friend for a few minutes.
And so I traveled to the mirror, where I will speak to her. Perhaps… Yes, I will tell her. Tonight, of all nights, none other would be appropriate. On our night of triumph, I shall show myself to her. And I will tell her that I love her. If I must prostrate myself at her feet, begging that she love me in return, so be it. Pride will vanish, and glory will rot. But if she does love me… who needs either? If she loves me… I shall be the happiest of men! I keep my vigil behind the glass, as I watch her enter, Madame at her side like good fairy I know she really is. She has protected the beautiful princess from those rogues who would steal her away from the prince who yearns for her to break the wicked enchantment over him. And Madame has given her my rose- the deepest red, a symbol of my everlasting, undying love- all for Christine Daae. Soon, so soon, I am trembling with the nearness of the moment. I can only hope that I do not frighten her. To discover that her Angel is the Phantom of the Opera… No! She will not turn from me. I cannot give in to these pathetic fears. She will love me. She has to love me. She does love me. She couldn't have sang that song… that glorious, sweet, heartbreaking song and not love me. I will not let mere nerves sway me. Deep, calming breaths, one after another.
And who is this?
The patron! The Vicomte de Chagny. He knows her! She never mentioned… no, wait. A boy she knew, when she was very young. The last year of her father's life, at the cottage in Brittany. He ran into the sea to fetch her red scarf. Is this him? No! no, it cannot be. A childhood sweetheart? Oh God… my world is tumbling down about me. She cannot… she cannot think to love him!
He is an aristocrat, titled, and entitled. Entitled to the attentions of the Opera Populaire's newest reigning prima donna, or so he thinks. He'll learn soon enough. Christine Daae is mine. I will not lose her to some young roué who thinks that he can flick a wrist and any beautiful woman will fall to his feet. But my fears are allayed. She dismisses him. Not as regally as she might have done, but I'll overlook that this time. Her relative youth makes her timid at times.
So easy, she stepped through the looking glass, like the immortal Alice. I led her through the underground- she was my star, my light, luminous in white. A lovely Persephone to my Hades. And now I am Charon, ferrying her away across the lake- Averne or Styx, whichever you prefer. And now… we are in my world. Beyond the Opera, beyond Paris even- there is a dark paradise of my own making. And somehow, her light fits into it. She is the star of my night! Every candle lit, swaying under her influence. She is all in white, like a bride. A bride… dare I? Of course, I do. Tonight I will dare anything.
"Come, I have something to show you." I whisper in her ear, my voice soft as the wings of a butterfly. She follows, a dreamy smile upon her face, her eyes soft and misty. I lift the curtain to show her my fondest wish, my most daring dream.
It is her. A life size automat, the wax features sculpted with infinite care- every fold and spangle of the dress and veil in place. Perfect, flawless- Christine. Apparently that was one shock too much for her delicate sensibilities. Damnation! I was always one to push just a bit beyond the boundaries, and now look what has happened. She fainted! Never before in her life has she succumbed to what I'd thought was a ploy in the arsenal of the ballet rat or of Carlotta. But this was no ploy. I'd overwhelmed her. I will pay for it in the morning, no doubt. But for now, I sing that sweet lullaby to her, setting her down into the bed. I'd get no sleep tonight, but she would need it. And I could never truly deny her anything. No, for tonight I shall lay aside Don Juan, and I shall work on another piece. A new piece. I already know the name. My Don Juan burns, but my Taliesin shines. A theme variation on All Through the Night plays in my head, the core of this new piece. Don Juan is nearly finished- it is the carnal, all the wickedness of me- wrapped up in a blood red bow to be delivered to the managers. Taliesin will be all the goodness, all the beauty I can make- it is the starlit heavens of night, the most exquisite of all the songs in my head. For Taliesin is my love for Christine. All the shining, sparkling heights of dizzying beauty that I can achieve. I have plumbed the depths of my mind, and now, with Christine Daae here with me, I am ready, finally to explore the heavens. I feel joyful, as if my soul is new and fresh. Nothing can hurt me now. She loves me. And someday, someday soon… we shall be together. I can make her happy. I will make her happy.
While the moon her watch is keeping,
all through the night…
Visions of delight revealing
Breathes a pure and holy feeling,
all through the night.
A/N: I used some quotes from various sources, including lines from "Cross the Green Mountain" from the Gods & Generals soundtrack, and a description of Alice (in Alice and Wonderland, etc.) from Mark Twain in his praise of Anne of Green Gables. Lastly, "star of my night" is from the Irish ballad, "Kathleen Mavourneen." I know I've not updated in a very very very long time, but I hope that this begin to make up for that deficiency.
And now for the shameless groveling and begging for more reviews. I'm such a review addict! Who needs drugs when praise (and properly worded constructive criticism) is so much more intoxicating!
Now back to my regularly scheduled farewells.
Warmest regards,
K.S.