Disclaimer: I don't own twilight.

thanks to the 2 people who reviewed the story so far, a poor showing but its enough to make me want to write. maybe if more people review, the chapters might get longer!

Edward's POV:

Watching Bella sleep was the single closest thing I had, myself, to sleep. Every night I watched her dream. She was always so pleasant. Her long, brown curls spread about her pillow in a lazily beautiful way. Dark lashes sat atop her smooth, pink cheeks and her breath came in light pants as she slept deeply. She was so utterly stunning, even in sleep.

I reached out tentatively to brush a stay wisp of hair from her forehead, my fingers grazing her velvet skin. The sheer warmth of her thrilled me, made me want more. I longed to be closer to her. To feel her hot touch and have it warm my frozen body as nothing else in the world could.

I stroked her arm lightly and thought about what it would be like when she, too became a vampire. Her rosy cheers would lose their living glow as her body would no longer have blood, or even a beating heart. Gone would be those pools of brown I have grown to love, replaced by fiery red, and later light gold. She would still be my Bella; smell like her, sound like her, act like her… but the little human traits would be gone forever. I wondered if she cared at all that her appetite for mortal food would disappear. Sleep would not longer be possible, neither would sweet dreams. Time would make no difference to her ageless, immortal body. What of later? When her parents and high school friends where long gone and everyone in the world that she had ever met would wither and die before she could bat an eye… would she care then?

I cannot lie, It saddened me to know that my Bella would change only for me. Had I been a mortal man, none of this would have been necessary. She could go to college, have children, live a normal life with me at her side to grow old with. Now to be with me she is forced into a life of eternal darkness and a constant thirst for blood. Would she regret her mistake? My sweet Bella had been begging me fore years to turn her into what I am. I only hoped that she was truly ready.

Bella stirred slightly, moving her little body closer to my own. Her chest pushed us against mine and her leg hitched itself around my hip. Even in her sleep it was as if she was trying to seduce me. If only she knew how much it worked! Every time I kissed her, my senses became over whelmed. Not only was I dealing with the temptations of a mortal man; the touch of her skin, sexual desires, the want of more, I also had to keep my vampiric tendencies in check; the sheer want of her all too fragrant blood. It was all too much.

It also killed me to deny her my body. I knew what she wanted, she verbalized it to me at least a thousand times. I wanted to give into her, God knows how much I wanted this prefect girl. To have her wrap her arms around my neck, scream my name, to fully become one with her was truly one of my greatest desires. Every time we were in bed together with her looking up at me, the pleading and want shown in her expressive eyes, I wanted to melt. To give into her every desire… but I couldn't. If I lost control for only a moment I could instantly kill her.

To kill Bella is unthinkable. I touched the diamond ring on her hand. It looked perfect on her. I couldn't get enough of it. I had known for a very long time that I would marry this girl and using my birth mother's ring made it even more special. Even she had loved this ring, although I offered to buy her something grander, more modern from Tiffany's, she denied it saying this was the one she wanted. And I loved her more for it.

But the sun, it rises much too soon some nights. This unnatural sun made me nervous. Forks never had clear skies that many days in a row… it was going on a week. I hated the rising sun. it meant I had to leave the warm bed of my future wife and hurry home, lest I be seen with my true skin in the sunlight. I slid out of bed, not jostling her an inch, and kissed her lightly on the cheek before jumping out the window and disappearing into the woods. Soon, I would never have to disappear on her again.

and that is chapter 4. a possible lemon, some possible drama, and a possible end to a relationship might be in store... better review so you can find out faster what happens!!