Sam

…

I open my eyes with the sun hitting them through the curtains. I pick up my head. I crotch hurts a bit from last night. I look around and Freddie is not on the bed lying with me. I look at his clock and see six AM. I close my eyes again but I get a nudge on my arm.

" Sam, Sam. Please wake up." Freddie says. I open my eyes and turn around to Freddie who has a concerned face. I pull his covers over my chest. He was wearing a man tank and tan shorts.

" What's wrong Freddie?" I ask. I was equally concerned as he was.

" I woke up this morning and I used the bathroom."

" Thank you for the image?" I say making a joke. He wasn't laughing.

" That's not all." He says.

" What happened Freddie?" I ask demandingly trying to keep my cool.

" The condom was broken." He says. I want to scream but nothing came out. My stomach contracted into a ball and stayed that way. I felt my heart drop dramatically. My world was flipped upside down.

Only one word ran through my brain. The high possibility that I could be….

" Pregnant." I say out loud. I look at Freddie. I didn't know what to do or say. I felt dirty. I look into Freddie's eyes and I can see how concerned he was. He pulled me into hug. I wanted to push him off but I knew I shouldn't. I could be carrying a little Benson inside of me.

" I need to take a shower." I say. He breaks from the hug. He gives me his shirt from last night and I run into the bathroom. The hot water made me feel better but my mind went quickly to the Health Class video of the woman giving birth. That could be me. Me! I started crying. A Puckett doesn't cry but I feel so weak and stupid. Freddie heard me cry and pulled the shower curtains to one side. He shut off the water and hugged me. I felt so safe in his arms.

" I'm so sorry." He says. I could tell he was on the verge of crying.

" Just promise me you'll be there for everything." I say. " I don't want to go through pain alone."

" I will never leave you." He says kissing my forehead. He gives me a towel and I watch him throw the sheets into the laundry and throw away the condom and dispose of the trash. By the time he came back, I was dressed in my shorts and one of his shirts I pull from his drawer.

" You still okay?" He asks. He keeps on asking if I am okay every five minutes. He must feel like shit. I don't out burst at him cause he's weak when girls like me are saddened. I smile.

" Yeah. Like I was five minutes ago." I say laughing. I am trying to make this better on both of us. He takes a seat next to me on his bed. He wraps his arm around my shoulder.

" If it makes you feel any better. I feel like shit. Elephant shit to be exact. I feel like a big piece of shit." Freddie says. I laugh.

" I don't blame you. I think little Sam down there was having the time of her life. I think the orgasm made her go on her murder streak." I say.

" And I think my swimmers want to try a new pool for once." We both laugh. I look into his eyes.

" I don't want this little thing to change anything between us." I say. " I think we should keep this a secret until indeed I am pregnant with little Benson cause if we conclude to soon that I am pregnant it's just going to become awkward and officially weird. Not to mention Carly."

" You want to keep the sex thing a secret to her," Freddie says.

" Until we find out that I am pregnant." I add.

" I just want to let you know. I love you no matter what happens." He says. My eyes well up.

" I love you too." I say through my sobs. I kiss him. I place my forehead on his.

" Since the night I kissed you on the fire escape." I look into his eyes again.

" Really?" I ask happily.

" Really." I wrap my arms around him and proceed with a make out.

-0-

Two months went by and every day was a living hell. My mind was on red alert for every possible pregnant signal. I didn't have morning sickness. I smelled an onion and I was okay. I still had my period. Even though every once in a while I craved chocolate with salt but that some times does happen to me. Sometimes my mind will play tricks on me. I could look down at my belly and I swear I would see a bulge of pregnantness. I would look back up and then back down and it was normal. I read two pregnancy books and I saw an episode of " I didn't know I was pregnant". It was scaring the shit out of me. Freddie and I were doing very well at acting like nothing ever happened but every time we looked at each other for longer than five minutes, I turned into a make out session. Not saying went all sexually active but, we were secretly dating.

iCarly was going good. Carly was still Carly but, dating Shane. Never a less we all saw that coming.