My ex stepdad Is seeing my little brother half an hour on wedensay and six and half hours on Tuesday. Sooooo nervous. I don't know what to think, happy for my brother who finally get to see his dad. Or hate the man for making our lifes horrible? Cause in my eyes he doesnt deserve to see his son.
I also need to cancle my trip to Hamar. It makes me sick just to think about it. I can't sleep at night. I never thought I would be so scared, not to this point. I just can't do it. Even how much I have been looking forward to it. Almost a year without My bestfriends.
My besfriends, how planned a surprise trip down here, setting it all up with my mother. But couldn't go trough with it due work. It melted my heart that they would do that for me. Words cant describe how much they mean to me. The bond we have is like a sister-bond. A sister can be seen as someone who is both ourselves and very much not ourselves - a special kind of double.
So close as that. I feel like we grew up together even tho we didn't. A sister is a forever friend. We talk at least once a week. About nothing and everything. And its true as they say. Some friends just click forever, and even tho its 44,5 miles between us, we manage to stay as close as we were when we were almost neighbors. To the outside world we all grow old. But not to us "sisters". We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We share private jokes. We remember feuds and secrets, grief's and joys. We live outside the touch of time. Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not all still friends. 3
It says alot about a man when he can ruin your life like that. To the point where you are scared to death! Too scared to visit your bestfriends you haven't seen since June 16 2009.
I know hate is a very strong word, but I can say with my hand on my heart.
I. HAT£. HIM.
~ Lene