Title: To Brave the Darkness

Disclaimer: I don't own anything about Sailor Moon

Author's Notes: Alright everyone. Here's my present for you this weekend. Another chapter! Enjoy!

The night of the party arrived, and despite her groaning, Raye was obviously excited about her birthday. Her guests all arrived on time, and Endymion's house had been decorated beautifully in reds and blacks. Mina had done a marvelous job.

They were happily talking and gossiping in the music room while musicians played in the corner. Some people were even dancing.

It seemed the perfect evening.

Raye was delighted and obviously loved being the center of attention, however gracious she was about it. She looked stunning in a long deep red dress that showed off her beautiful form.

Serenity smiled at her friends, all laughing and looking extremely pleased with their families around them. Lita's father had come and had proven to be a very pleasant older man. Mina's parents were, as always, delightful, and Amy had been allowed to come escorted by her brother.

Everyone seemed happy.

Serenity was about to join them, when someone entering caught her eye.

It wasn't that Endymion had decided to come, or that he looked just as handsome, if not more, than he always did. What made her freeze was the woman on his arm.

Endymion immediately smiled when he saw Raye, and Serenity watched them embrace as if they were family. He handed her a small package while whispering something in her ear, and she laughed joyously. But her smile turned into confusion when he introduced her to the lady with him.

Raye curtsied and Serenity saw her say something, but her eyes kept glancing at Endymion, unsettled.

She turned around, breathing hard.

He had brought a woman? The great Endymion, scandalous and dark, had brought a woman to his friend's birthday dinner held at his house? What sort of lady would come with him?

She glanced around again to look at her, and was almost devastated to see how pretty she was. Long dark hair and green eyes with a perfectly pouted mouth and thin frame. She looked everything a lady ready for marriage should.

Serenity knew it was Lita and Mina before they spoke, standing beside her.

"Who do you think she is?" Lita asked.

"Maybe he's finally found love," Mina said.

Serenity felt her heart clench at the words.

"It is strange of her not to have an escort. Maybe it's a family friend," Lita said.

"I didn't think he had any family," Mina said.

"He's never brought a woman to his home before. Raye said it was his one safe haven where he could go and just be alone. Already tonight there is probably more than one lady he could choose, so why bring his own?"

Serenity took a deep breath and walked away from them and across the room, approaching Raye and Endymion.

Raye immediately reached out to grab her hand while Serenity turned to Endymion.

His smile seemed cold to her, but she returned it anyway.

"Welcome home my lord," she said unfeelingly.

He straightened a little and gave her a curt bow. "Lady Serenity. I was just introducing Raye to Lady Anne."

Serenity smiled at her. "It is a pleasure to meet you."

The girl obviously couldn't be bothered. She gave her a halfhearted greeting and then looked back up at Endymion who she obviously admired.

Serenity wanted to growl at her. What had happened? Weren't they were supposed to be friends? The last time she had spoken to him, he had said that they would talk and try not to argue. Why was he now bringing ladies into his home?

"We didn't think you would make it," she said to Endymion, more coldly then she should have.

"Thankfully my plans were easily adjusted," he said smoothly. "I wouldn't want to miss Raye's birthday. She is my best friend after all."

Why was he acting so cold towards her? It was true that he could do whatever he wanted, but he could show the smallest amount of compassion towards her.

"You should have told us you were bringing a guest. We did not account for her."

"It's of little matter," he said callously. "We can keep ourselves otherwise occupied while you are having dinner."

"We can?" Anne asked obliviously.

Raye rolled her eyes. "Bringing them home now, that's low, even for you."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Endymion said glaring.

The mood had gone sour and Serenity hoped Raye would not think her party ruined. Endymion's gaze was like stone, and he stood straight and proud, as if he were ready for a battle.

"Just go already," Raye said angrily. "I'm happy you made it to my party, but I have no interest in seeing you cart around your latest conquest."

"I'll have you know that I am from a very respectable family," Anne said.

"They all are," Raye said without looking at her. She was glaring daggers at Endymion.

"I would remind you that you're in my house," he said smoothly.

"My mistake," Raye said. "Next time I'll make sure to stay far away from your territory."

Serenity stepped in front of Raye when she noticed that they had gathered some attention. She didn't want Raye to regret making a scene at her own party.

"Perhaps Anne would like to see your rose gardens," she said, sickly sweet to him. "I'm sure they're even more glorious by moonlight. Why don't you take her?"

"I love roses," Anne gushed.

Endymion didn't break his gaze from Serenity. "It would be my pleasure."

"Don't lean in too close," Serenity said, losing her smile a little, "we wouldn't want you to get pricked."

Endymion took Anne's hand and led her out of the room, moving casually and without haste. He was making it very clear that this was his house, and he could do in it what he wanted. Why he suddenly felt the need to take a stand was beyond her. He was being downright infuriating again and she was getting tired of it.

"Why did he agree to it if he had such a problem?" Mina asked softly.

"Who cares," Raye said shaking herself and smiling. "He's gone now and it's my birthday. I say we have cake."

"But we haven't had dinner yet?" Lita said surprised.

"There's nothing wrong with cake before dinner on your birthday."

"I couldn't agree more," Serenity said. "Let's have some cake."

Thankfully, the rest of the night went by smoothly. Raye seemed to forget that Endymion was there somewhere, probably having sex with that ridiculously clueless girl, and no longer interrupting her happiness. The cake was beautiful, the food was delicious, and everyone stayed late into the night, laughing and drinking wine. As far as birthday dinners went, Serenity felt like it was a success.

She even managed to have a good time herself, when she wasn't obsessing about what Endymion was doing.

How could he bring that girl here? What was he thinking? Who was she? What kind of family would allow their daughter to be escorted by someone with a reputation like Endymion's? It was mad to think that they knew. She had to somehow have escaped. Maybe staying at her home hadn't worked out, so Endymion had no choice but to convince her to sneak out and come with him here.

It was disgusting no matter which way she thought about it.

Finally, when the night was coming to an end, and Raye was wishing her last guest a farewell, Serenity felt just how tired she was.

"Well I'm certainly glad we don't have to go home tonight," Raye said as she flopped down on the low sofa.

Serenity looked at her surprised. "We're not going home tonight?"

"It's too late, and we're always welcome to stay here."

"But…it's not…with Endymion."

"He's a jerk," Raye said, "but it's a big enough house that we can probably just ignore him. I've already had a room made up for you. We'll leave first thing in the morning."

Serenity really wanted to argue. She really wanted to tell Raye that she wasn't comfortable staying here. But Raye was already walking out of the room, drunk on wine and half asleep already. There would be no winning this argument.

She sat where she was for a moment, wondering if she was supposed to have followed Raye. Most of the servants were already gone for the night, and the rest were cleaning up the party.

She sighed, giving into the situation. What could possibly go wrong?

She found out, very quickly.

As soon as she walked into the upper hallway Raye had previously told her held all the bedrooms, she regretted her decision to come to the party at all.

At first it was a soft sound, muffled and far away. Stupidly she thought Raye was calling for her. She moved quickly towards the end of the hall, only a few doors down from her own room, and froze.

The sounds were obvious now. A woman experiencing a great deal of pleasure, and forgetting all sense of propriety while expressing that pleasure.

She felt sick to her stomach.

He was actually having sex with her.

Serenity turned and went into her room without another thought. She didn't want to picture it. She didn't want to think about him being with someone else. It was one thing when he was far away, but another when he was in the same house she was in.

She realized in that moment that they couldn't be friends. They couldn't go on pretending nothing had happened between them. She was incapable of forgetting about that first time together. She had hoped that it had meant something to him, anything at all. But it was blatantly clear now that the only thing he had ever cared about was another trophy.

She tried to stop the tears from sliding down her face, feeling foolish for being hurt once again by his actions, but there was no stopping them. The only thing she knew was that she didn't want to be here.

But where could she go? She couldn't go to Raye's without Raye. She wouldn't be able to get in. She couldn't go to Lita or Mina's. They lived too far away and it was too late to get a horse.

She had no choice.

But she would not stay in this room, so close to him. Not when she felt like breaking down that door and throwing things at him.

She quickly wiped her eyes, being careful not to smear her make-up, and then walked quickly out of the room and back down the hall.

The house was dark, but Serenity knew enough to find her way. The sitting room was dark and the music room was being cleaned. The only place she could think of going was the library, which thankfully had a dull burning fire left in it.

She paced for a while, trying to calm herself. She couldn't really figure out why she was so angry with him. He had the right to do whatever he wanted, but it was like he paraded it tonight. He was saying that this was who he was and he would never change. It was as if he had something to prove to them, and he had decided Raye's party was the best place to do it.

She found herself breathing hard, and had to slow down and try and relax.

Taking a few deep breaths, Serenity was able to calm down.

She closed her eyes, focusing on slowing her pulse.

She would not get angry anymore. Not because of him.

She picked up the first book she saw and sat down in a chair by the fire, swinging her legs around so she could rest them over the arm. She curled up, unpinning her hair and letting it fall around her.

She sighed and started reading.

Serenity had no idea how long it had been when someone gently brushed the hair from her face, waking her from her peaceful sleep. She was a little disoriented at first, but slowly remembered where she was.

When she opened her eyes, Endymion was looking softly down at her.

Serenity didn't move. The book she had been reading was resting against her chest, and her legs were still thrown over the chair. She must have fallen asleep without realizing it.

His blue eyes were tired.

"Why are you here?" He asked softly.

Serenity swallowed, trying to get rid of the sleepy fog in her brain. "I could hear you from my room," she blurted out.

He seemed surprised by that. "Oh," he said, pausing. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize."

Serenity pushed herself up a little, wincing as she felt how stiff her back was. He moved away while she righted herself, and then sat on the arm of the chair her legs had just vacated. Serenity felt very physically close to him in that moment, and it made her body seem hotter than it should, almost uncomfortable.

"It doesn't matter," she said, unconsciously clutching the book to her.

"I didn't realize you were staying."

"Raye informed me pretty much last minute. I didn't know until the party was over."

"Was it a success?"

She hated this, having small talk with him when there felt like something else was waiting to be said. She hated games and she hated lies. It was frustrating.

"I should go," she said getting up. "Now that you're down here I can get some sleep."

He sighed in frustration. "You know, things were a lot better for me before you came around."

She turned to look at him affronted. "What do you mean by that?"

His anger seemed to come from nowhere. "I have never felt guilty about anything I've ever done before."

"That makes you a monster and it has nothing to do with me."

He sank into the chair she had just vacated looking tired and defeated. Serenity found herself softening, feeling sorry for whatever he was going through. But she was still angry and sad, and she didn't want to sit here and talk to him like nothing was wrong.

"It's not the same," he said.

"What's not the same?"

"None of it," he said. "The women, the passion. None of it's the same."

"I don't understand what you mean."

"You ruined me," he said in exasperation.

Serenity looked at him like he was mad.

"Before you, I loved doing what I do," he said. "It was fulfilling. I slept well every night, proud of my achievements. But then you had to walk into my room that night and make me realize just how much better it could be if I was with someone who wanted it as badly as I did. Now I'm not satisfied no matter who I've slept with. Anne used to be one of the ladies I prided myself in. She responded to me unlike anyone else. But now even she pales in comparison."

"I can't believe you're blaming me for this," Serenity said. "I didn't even want you that night. I would have gone to anyone."

The look he gave her then was pained, as if she had physically hit him.

She sighed, putting her book down on the table beside her. "I can't do this anymore Endymion," she said. "I don't have experience with this sort of thing and it's exhausting. It feels like we're having the same argument again. I used you and I'm sorry I did, but I don't regret where it brought me. You came to my stepfather's home to do the same thing to me, and now you're upset because I got to you first. How do you think all those women feel now that they're alone to remember their first time? How do you think they feel when they think about this mistake they made, no matter how pleasurable it was?"

Endymion didn't answer. He just sat there, looking at her.

"I've never thought about my future," Serenity said. "I've never considered what I might tell my husband one day now that I've been with another man. But most of the women you've been with are born with the idea in their heads that one day they'll marry a rich man and be faithful to them. I would wager a great deal that when they gave themselves to you, they thought you would love them above all the others and ask for their hand."

He looked away with guilt written across his features. But still he didn't say anything.

"And now you're going back for seconds," she continue. "Anne is foolish enough to believe it will be different with you this time, and yet here you are, probably looking for a way to escape the woman in your bed, regretting your decision to bring her here."

"I regret all of them," he said softly.

"And yet you keep going."

"If I stop, I'll have to think about everything I've done," he said quietly. "I'll remember them all and be overwhelmed with guilt. If I stop and don't have another goal to achieve, it'll all pile up on me."

Serenity did feel sorry for him in that moment. He looked so lost then, so defeated. This was so unlike the man she had met so many weeks ago. He was so unlike the man who had brought her here and teased her about what they had done. But there was still a sadness in her that she couldn't seem to let go of. For a few weeks now, there was one issue she had wanted to address.

"You never came to see if I was pregnant," she said softly.

Endymion looked at her, his eyes suddenly surprised. "Are you?"

"Do you care?" She asked doubtfully.

His eyes were troubled then. "If you are, I will take care of you."

"Why me?" She asked. "Why not any of the other ladies you've slept with?"

"They're not here right now," he said. "If they were, they would have come to me."

"Or their families would have covered it up, hiding them away until it was over. You might have ruined their lives and never cared enough to know."

"If I had a child somewhere, I would know about it," Endymion said seriously.

She shook her head, sighing. "Well then I wouldn't want your perfect record to be tarnished. I'm not pregnant. I don't know what kind of luck a man would have to have to do what you do and not have any children, but it did not run out with me."

She felt bad for the way he looked away from her then. He was troubled, and part of her knew that at this point she was just torturing him. But she felt like she had the right to do it. He had done the same to her by bringing Anne here with him.

"You're not an evil being in every way," she said after a moment hesitancy. She had a need to make him feel better that she was trying to squash, but wasn't succeeding. As much as she was hurt, she didn't like to see him so upset. So she struggled, trying to push the dark thoughts from her mind.

He looked at her, his brow furrowed.

"You could think about what you did for me," she said. "I'm grateful every day for what you did."

"I could have stopped you that night," he said. "But I didn't want too."

She nodded. "Endymion, if you want to change than change. Nobody else can do it for you. You're still young. It is possible to be someone else."

"What if I don't want to be someone else?"

"Then accept it and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Every decision you make is yours, so own up to it."

She started to walk away from him then, but was surprised when he got up and hurried to stop her.

He took her hand, turning her slowly back to him.

Serenity was trapped by the intensity of his gaze. It made her feel breathless and nervous. Her pulse quickened at how close he was to her in that moment.

He leaned down; almost close enough to kiss her. She could feel his breath on her lips.

"Since I met you I haven't desire anything else," he whispered huskily.

Serenity felt weak, but she held on to her focus. Part of her desperately wanted to hear what he was saying to her and what his intentions were, but she couldn't.

"Serenity, I've wanted you since the very first time we met."

She struggled with herself. "If you think that any attempt to convince me of your attachment will work when you have a woman upstairs laying naked and used in your bed, then you are very mistaken," she said in a whisper.

With that, she turned around and walked away, feeling a dull ache start to form in her chest and the tears once again fall from her eyes.

End of Chapter Eight! Please Review