Disclaimer: Of course I don't own NCIS! But oh how I wish I owned Tony! I love him so much *sobs* and I'll never have him!

It's gonna be Tony/OC. Poor Tony, this is an angst piece. I wanted to show a side of Tony that isn't normally shown before, and also why he is so 'loose' with the girls he dates.

Chills

Sometimes, Tony knew that his day was going to be bad. Like today for instance, he should have known that he would have a bad day. Every time he got that chill that ran down his spine and the uncomfortable dread when he woke up, something bad always happened. The day he had been the unfortunate recipient of the plague, and when he had almost been blown up when he came back from his sick leave. Or the time Kate died. All those days he knew something bad was going to happen. And now today, he had followed Gibbs, sure that something was going on. He had been right; Gibbs knew where Maddie Tyler was and went to save her. Of course it turned out so well. Yea, so Tony had had to run a fast as he could, shoot to guys while running, dive into the cold River, swim down to the car, pull the windshield out of the car, and bring Maddie up to the surface. Then take a deep, painful breath, swim back down, yank the steering wheel up, save Gibbs. Resuscitate both Gibbs and Maddie, and then be forgotten about as they were rushed to the hospital.

"Good 'ol Tony, always saves the day." Tony muttered to himself depreciatively.

"Well I don't know Tony; you always seem to do a good job at it!" A woman next to him replied. She had long, curly brown hair that went to her waist, and light, almost white eyes.

"Mia," Tony sighed. "How'd you know I was here?" She just smiled. "I should have known today would be a suck-ish day. Something always goes wrong when I get that feeling. I should have known that no one would pay attention to me-COUGH." Tony hacked as much gunk as he could out, and sniffed a little. "I wonder how Gibbs is going to take me having to take a few days off."

"You don't look so good, what did Brad say?" Mia asked as she fiddled with a napkin, eyeing the glass of whiskey by Tony's hand.

"Said that I developed a chest cold, and that I was lucky I didn't get pneumonia. He also said I should have gone to the doctor sooner. But I was busy processing the scene in soaking wet clothes, and trying to breathe right again. I also pulled a muscle from pulling the steering wheel out. But what am I gonna do?" Tony replied bitterly.

"I'm sorry your day was so bad Tony." Mia replied as she watched a couple dance. "I wish I could make it better for you. But I think you did a great job, and Gibbs should have thanked you." Mia replied.

"Yea well Gibbs never thanks anybody for anything. Why do I always pay the price for everything Mia? Bad things always happen to me. First my fucked up childhood, my mother overdosing and my father just being a bastard. Then I loose my best friend to a drunk driving accident. I still remember my father telling me that Dinozzo's don't cry. But I cried for Matt. Then I get the PLAGUE, of all things, and almost get myself blown up after I come back to work. Kate is shot in the head and I get her blood splattered all over my face. Ziva kills her own brother, which makes Gibbs respect her, but I'm not supposed to know about that. It's a secret. Gibbs gets blown up and loses his memory, I become the team leader, and McGee and Ziva belittle me. Abby reminds me everyday of who im not, and Ducky is mad because he doesn't know who Gibbs is anymore. The only person who is even friendly to me anymore if Palmer. Ziva goes to Gibbs when she needs his help and he ends up coming back and booting me without me even knowing it. Meanwhile I've started an undercover op for Jenny, and I think I'm letting my self in to deep. Paula is killed saving everyone, Jeanne finds out who I really am and I realize that I never really loved her. And then finally, today, I risk my life to save Gibbs and I don't even get a 'good job Tony', or 'well done'." Tony ranted.

Mia smiled sadly, "I know that you don't think you've had a very happy life. But you've made my life happy. I love you Tony, I always have, always will."

Tony smiled sadly as well and said, "I love you too Mia, ever since I was sixteen and you beat the crap out of me."

She laughed, and then looked up. Tony look up as well to see Palmer making his way into the bar. When he noticed Tony he made his way over and smiled sadly.

"I've heard you've had an eventful day Tony." Jimmy stated.

Tony snorted, "If that's what you wanna call it."

Jimmy smiled, "Well I wanted to let you know that I thought you did a good job out there. If I could, I'd give you that award that Gibbs always gets. You deserve it."

"Thanks Jimmy. Right now, I'm kinda wishing I had just stayed in bed this morning. I knew today was going to be a bad day. Got that feeling I always get before something bad happens."

Jimmy looked confused, "What do you mean?" Tony explained what he had already told Mia. Jimmy looked thoughtful and then replied, "When did it start?"

Tony smiled grimly at him and replied, "Almost 10 years ago."

Jimmy started, "But that's when you started college!"

Tony just shook his head, "I was on my way back from the hospital, I had broken my leg in a football game. I was really upset because Basketball season was starting up, and the doctor said that the break was really bad, and I'd probably never be able to play again. I was my dream to go professional. I knew something bad was going to happen that day, could just feel it. I was moody and grouchy all day. Finally, around two in the morning I get this call. It's the local police department. My friend had been in an accident, she was in the hospital in critical condition. I had one of my buddies drive me there. She died three hours later." Tony sighed and threw back the rest of his drink. "She's part of the reason I took up Law Enforcement. I had wanted to be a police officer when I was younger, but grew out of it when sports infuriated my dad. She had always wanted me to do what I wanted, to make my dreams come true. I decided to do just that, and made my classes for Law Enforcement. I was planning on marrying her. We had been going out or six years, we were in love."

Tony sucked in a breath and looked up at Jimmy. "Sometimes, it's like she's still here, talking to me when I've had a bad day. I don't think I can ever love someone as much as I loved her."

Tony looked around, wobbling a little and realized that he was in the parking lot, and his whole team had heard his confession. He smiled sadly, and said, "I guess you don't really know me after all do you?"

And with that, he walked away, his hand clutching the tiny little ring that he wore around his neck. A reminder of why he was still here.

So what'd you think?