Title: The Man in the Hospital
Author: Shannon - shannyfish
Disclaimer: I do not own "Bones" or its characters, Fox does. This is merely for entertainment purposes only. "
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Pick up from the Season Four Finale – plain and simple.
Warning: Severe spoilers for "The End of the Beginning" – Season Four Finale episode! You have been warned!
Chapter 8 – "The Day After the Last Day"
Author's Notes: Okay, I do plan on finishing this. Just been a lot going on the last year. Also, this fic takes A LOT of research and a different tone of voice. It takes me a bit to slide into this writing style sometimes ~_^
Day ? - Unknown Location
She felt light.
She felt tingly all over. It was like her skin was dancing. She couldn't see, but it was light. She didn't know where she was. She knew she wasn't where she'd been the day before. She couldn't feel the pipes that had held her bones in place. She didn't have the sleeping bag wrapped around her. All those things were gone.
The sounds that engulfed her were quiet, but if she concentrated on them, they became overpowering. So, she tried not to focus on them, but sometimes there was a sound. It would seem like a familiar whisper but when she concentrated, then it would just be a pool of sound. Nothing felt familiar in that pool.
Brennan realized that this was somewhat familiar to what people described some versions of an afterlife. She didn't believe in God or an afterlife, so why was she there? She couldn't move, even if she wanted to move towards the white light. She was stationary…in almost a stasis state.
"Temperance, if you can hear me," said a gentle beautiful male voice. "I love you." The last part was a whisper, but she heard it.
The voice had brought comfort to her. She wondered whom the voice belonged to. She honestly didn't believe in God, but somehow she thought that Booth would believe that God would be there for her just the same. Even if she didn't believe. Was that the case?
…
The Blur that Came After
"Bones?"
"Temperance?"
"Give her some space!"
The light had become brighter and the noise had clarified into distinct sounds. Into voices. Familiar voices. Voices that she could start placing names to. That had some semblance in her life. And then she realized it…
She was alive.
She hadn't died on that mountain.
The voices, they were Booth and her father and Angela and she was sure that if she could only force her eyes open that she could see their faces and possibly the faces of others. She tried, but they didn't budge, she couldn't even really feel them for certain. Her eyelids just weren't cooperating, she finally decided. She tried to move and she could suddenly feel as if weight was pressed upon her body.
It wasn't heavy, per say.
The lightness was gone.
She was no longer a feather.
Weight had returned to her body.
She was whole again.
That was all she could think of when she was trying to figure out what was going on. But she'd been there the whole time. She'd heard them, so it wasn't like she hadn't been there before… This was just an odd way to regain consciousness, she decided.
"Booth," the name escaped her lips, barely audible and without her permission.
It wasn't that she didn't want Booth, she did. She needed him, but she hadn't thought to say it. It had just come out all on its own. She could slowly feel all her body…her legs lying straight and her arms at her sides. She ached, but she wasn't surprised. Brennan remembered what had happened. The pain and agony that she'd endured during the time she was up there on her own.
The touch of her hand in someone else's hand caught her by surprise. Warmth spread from her hand and up to her heart. She immediately knew who was there. Holding her hand. Trying to comfort her. Booth, he was definitely there. By her bedside, just waiting for her to open her eyes.
So, why was that so hard?
Eyes open. Nothing. Brennan tried again, but nothing happened. It was highly disappointing to say the least. She felt like she was so close. Like she was under the water and so close to the surface in order to pull in fresh clean air into her lungs. She was so close and yet it felt so, so far…
"I'm here," came his whisper.
It was encouraging, but her eyes still wouldn't cooperate. Instead, she was highly aware of her own throat and lungs. She was trying to breathe, but something was there blocking it. But she was breathing…but her body started to labor because of it.
"Relax."
The voice calmed her, and she tried not to focus on it. She wanted nothing more to see him. To see his warm chocolate eyes staring down at her. Brennan remembered telling him that she hated it when he let her hug him when she was scared. Right now, she could let him hold her for a year and still not want him to let go. She needed him. She needed his comfort.
Pain.
Immense pain.
It overtook her.
Made her scream out in agony.
It was even more intense than her leg had been. It was the worst pain she'd ever felt. She wanted to pull her skin from her bones. To try to pull the pain away from her in any way. "Help me!" she screamed. She thought she saw a hand reach out for her and she tried to reach for it, but it disappeared before she could grip it. It was just gone. She was alone. But soon the cruel darkness overtook her. Pulling her from the painful existence she'd been living into the silent, unfeeling void.
…
Hospital Room
The familiar sterile white room surrounded her and she suddenly felt panic wash over her. She was somewhere that was familiar and yet she had no recollection of getting there. Her eyes searched the room. It was empty, she was alone. Just her and the continual hum of the machines she was hooked up to. A machine was even breathing for her, which was starting to cause her to fight it. She was all too aware of it and not able to relax how she knew that she really needed to.
Machines beeped faster.
She could hear footsteps and she blinked. The sun was bright and shining in, making the room seem whiter and more washed out. A round nurse entered her room and called for another nurse to get a doctor.
"You need to relax, Doctor Brennan," the nurse said. "We're going to get this tube out. But you have to help us."
Brennan nodded the best she could and blinked her eyes to keep them open. Her lungs burned from her trying to fight the tube and the oxygen it was pumping into her lungs. So, she tried to relax. And it almost completely worked.
A doctor arrived and another nurse. The tube was removed and she was offered a sip of water. Only a sip. It was all they thought she could handle and they were most likely right. She'd make herself sick if she attempted to gorge herself on the sweet wet liquid. "Booth," she managed to get out.
"You have some visitors," the nurse said. "They've been waiting for quite some time. We'll allow them in to visit as soon as the doctor is done."
"Should only be a few more minutes," the doctor tried to assure as he continued to look her over and then occasionally look at the machines.
Several minutes passed, she tried to remain as patient as possible. Finally, the doctor made a comment that she was recovering nicely and the nurses seemed pleased. They told her that they'd be bringing in her visitors. Excitement and anxiety seized her system. She wasn't sure what to feel at first.
Happy faces entered.
Everyone was glowing.
There was chattering.
Everyone she had thought was there before the pain, was there and more. Her father, Booth, Angela, Hodgins, Cam, Sweets, interns… She tried to offer them a smile, but wasn't sure if it actually reached her cheeks.
"Hey, how'ya feeling, Sweetie?" Angela asked, moving past everyone to her side.
Brennan noticed that she seemed happy. That was a relief; she thought that Angela would be a complete wreck from worry. Of course, she was fine and that was probably where the good mood came from. "I'm sorry, Ang," she forced out.
"Shhh… We're just all glad that you're safe," she said as she moved a strand of Brennan's hair back behind her ear. "You get some rest… We can't stay for long, but I am going to bring you some clothes and other things by tomorrow… So, don't worry about that."
"Thanks, Ang."
"And don't worry, I've been watching the mini squints," Hodgins said.
Brennan smiled. "Thank you, Doctor Hodgins."
"No worries," he said and turned to the interns that had assembled in the back of the room.
She watched as Hodgins, Angela, and the interns slowly filed out of the room. Cam, Sweets, Booth, and her father remained.
"I'm really glad that you're okay, Doctor Brennan," Cam said. "If there's anything you need, let me know."
"Thank you," she said. Cam nodded and then left the room as well.
"If you need to talk-" Sweets started.
Brennan quickly interrupted. "I'll…keep that in mind." She didn't want to upset him, but she also didn't want to talk to him about what had happened. She had psychology.
"You're so lucky," her father said as he approached her bedside.
She noticed that he looked like he was going to cry. She hadn't meant to cause him pain or worry. She'd only meant to get away for a while, to clear her head. To bring in objectivity.
"Please, don't leave the country again without someone going with you," he requested. "Russ has been so worried since I had to call him…"
"I'm sorry," she whispered and looked down. She felt like she was five suddenly. She really hadn't expected to be found and wake up in a hospital in the United States with so many loved ones around her so worried about her. She'd honestly expected to die out there. On the mountain.
He reached out and stroked her cheek before leaning in and kissing her forehead. "I love you, Tempe."
"I love you, Dad," she whispered back. Tears formed in her eyes, but remained there. She didn't want to break down crying in front of him. She needed to be strong. She'd had to have been strong growing up. She had to take care of herself and she hated to show such weakness.
He left after a moment, leaving just Booth in the room. She'd seen him; he'd been in the far back. His back against the wall, leaning with his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes had never left her. He'd waited patiently for his turn to talk with her. She had so many questions and she was just generally happy to see him.
"Please, never do that again," he whispered.
His eyes were sad and worried. She could tell this so easily. Booth could still read people so much better than she could, but these basic things she could tell from looking at him. Plus, Booth was probably the one person on the planet that she knew best. "I'm sorry," she whispered. She'd repeated it enough…but she truly was. She had thought that she needed it, but she really had needed Booth. She'd needed him.
"What were you looking for in Peru?" he asked as he moved a chair from the corner to her bedside. He sat down in it and stared at her.
"I was…I was trying to escape," she told him honestly. "I couldn't handle it here… It was too much. Too much that wasn't familiar. There was too much change…and yet everything hardly changed."
He nodded. "You were running from me."
"No-"
"I thought you were dead," he interrupted. "Wendell and I went looking for you when you didn't check in. We had to get a guide and walk the trail from Machu Picchu…we didn't know exactly where you were on the path. What were you thinking? Not taking a satellite phone? Not taking GPS? Leaving the guide group?"
His voice raised a bit. He was upset, but not furious with her. She didn't blame him though if he wanted to be absolutely appalled with her. "I…I needed to quiet… And then I realized… Out there, when I was alone…that I wished that you were there. And towards the end…or at least what I remember of it. You were there with me."
"You saw me?" he asked in confusion.
"No…but I heard you," she clarified. "You and Wendell went down to Peru to find me?"
"Of course," Booth told her. His voice soft. "I couldn't lose you… I may not remember every single detail of every case we've worked over the last several years, but I can tell you that there is no way I'd just move on… I care about you, Bones…"
She nodded, the tears finally releasing down her cheeks. "I know," she whispered. She felt the same. It was unspoken between them. It had been for so many years. They were so close…and yet in ways, they were still struggling to meet. It was hard to explain. And…then, it felt like they were so close. Maybe she was afraid. Afraid of commitment. Afraid of loving someone with all her heart… But didn't she already? She loved Booth. She'd happily give her life to save his… She had wanted to have his child… She had wanted to forever be linked to him. Wasn't that loving him with her whole heart?
"I need to say it," he told her, leaning forward in his chair.
"Booth-" she began, but he stopped her.
"When I saw you there…and I thought for a second that we were too late. That you were gone. I had wished that I'd never made it through that surgery… That somehow that would have kept you from going there… But even if you had, all I could think was that at least we'd be together in Heaven. I just…I can't stand to think to live without you, Temperance…" His voice lowered to a mere whisper. "I love you, Bones. You have to know that. That I can't live without you here…"
It was so much to take in. So much love to process. She'd been far too used to trying to push people away. From not having a family. From not feeling like she even had a place within the Jeffersonian family…or her own biological one. This was something that had been unspoken. They both knew it was there.
"I love you," she whispered back. "I'm so sorry I left… I just…I couldn't think… I couldn't bear for you to not remember me…to not remember what our lives have been together," she confessed. It sounded pathetic suddenly, but did it really matter? They were both alive, safe, sound, and together… They'd spoken words that they'd hidden away in their hearts.
He moved from his chair, he held her hand and kissed her forehead before moving down to meet her lips. She returned the kiss and suddenly her leg, that had been throbbing, felt at ease. Like the pain had floated away. Nothing mattered but them, they were together…they were happy…they loved each other.
"Promise?" he requested.
Brennan smiled a small smile. "I promise that the next time I want to hike the trail to Machu Picchu, that I'll take you with me," she said. It would be far more enjoyable with him there and she had a feeling that he'd have the right things to say if there were businessmen there that annoyed her. He always knew the right things to say to people. She didn't have that talent.
"I expect you to keep that promise," he told her before kissing her again. "Plus," he added after a moment. "There seems to be a shortage of Forensic Anthropologists with your genius. And I'm sure that even if I found one that was close to it, I wouldn't be able to work with them. It's you and me, Bones."
"You and me," she echoed with a bright smile, her hand held his tightly as she stared up at him.
…
The End.