Okay so I've been writing these chapters in present tense from Bonnie's point of view but I kind of wanted to do one in third person so that we could know what both of them are thinking. No dialogue here but I hope it's still okay haha. Keep in mind Damon is always a difficult character to write :/ I don't know if I like this chapter either b/c it feels a bit cheesy and mushy to me. I felt like I was going into Twilight territory hahaha. Oh well ;) Thanks again for your great reviews. Love, BamonTivaLove
They lay side by side on his bed, both completely still and quiet. They had been having a silent conversation but that had come to an end a while back. Now, as they took in each other's breathing patterns, something that would've been completely uncomfortable with anyone else, felt perfectly natural to them.
Bonnie looks over at Damon and takes in the way his hands are on his stomach, his fingers gently tapping. She admires the deep concentration of his eyes, which are focused on the ceiling. Every time she looks at him she feels this swelling in her heart, a mixture of pride and love. She feels pride because of the all the people he could've chosen to be with, of all the girls fate could've put aside for him, she was the one. She feels a love for him that she's never felt for anyone else. The kind of love where she knows she'd do anything for him and was secure in the knowledge that he'd do anything for her. She feels safe and protected with him and even though she knows she doesn't need it, its nice to know he would always be there to defend her. She thinks about the security she feels when she is with him and how ironic it is that of all the people she could feel safe with, it had to be Damon Salvatore. She pictures his face that night he attacked her and wonders how this person who touched her so gently now could be the same person. This person who looked at her with eyes that she could only describe as sincere and kind. This person that held her hand as if he never wanted to let go and kissed her as though he'd never felt something so amazing before. This person whose thoughts seemed to mirror her own despite the vast differences in their lifestyles and history. She thinks about all the times that she says she doesn't need him and then winces at the fact that she knows deep down that she does need him. She wouldn't die without him, no, and she'd get over him eventually but she knows that nothing would be the same without him.
When he feels Bonnie's eyes avert to the ceiling where his were just directed, he glances over at her and observes her. He relishes in the curve of her mouth and the perfect shape of her nose and her long lashes. He smiles inwardly at the way her jaw is set, always ready to fight or defend someone or stand up for herself. She was always so willing to help those in need, so loyal and strong and pure at heart, something he'd never really appreciated in anyone. He takes pride in the fact that she can take care of herself and he realizes the significance of the fact that he genuinely respects her and her opinion of him. He listens carefully to the beat of her heart, steady and deep, and he suddenly feels the urge to take her in his arms and just hold her forever, something he knows in his case is a possibility. But he holds back and stays still because this silence between them is too perfect to break. He imagines his life before her and can't imagine why God, if there was one, could ever be so cruel as to keep her from him for all these years. He curses life when he thinks about all the decades he'd spent without her smile that made his knees shake, without her good, kind heart that gave him goosebumps, without her beautiful eyes that always watched him with such deep concentration. He thinks about all the times he'd hurt her, intentionally and unintentionally and it makes him sick to his stomach. He closes his eyes and pictures that night when he'd bitten her and tries to remember all the rage he'd felt but he can't because the thought of ever feeling that way about her is impossible. He feels protective of her, of her innocence and of her virtue and of her idealism and youth. But he knows it is more than protectiveness. He's been around long enough to know that this is love. Whatever he was forced to feel with Katherine, he knows that this is what it was supposed to feel like all those years ago. He knows that this is what first love is. He knows that Elena was a stepping stone to Bonnie, someone he got over Katherine with. This all scares him because he knows that, being a vampire, his emotions are ten times stronger and more intense than that of a human. He knows that if he tried to, he wouldn't be able to leave Bonnie, even if he wanted to. He scolds himself inwardly for having been careless and fallen for someone so hard. No she isn't a normal human, but she isn't a vampire either, she isn't someone who can live forever alongside him. This is why this dependence frightens him and he begins to feel as though he's drowning. Bonnie senses his uneasiness and slips her small hand into his. The cool of her touch immediately calms him and he wonders how anyone could make him feel so at ease, no matter what was going on around him.
Neither of them know what the future holds and neither wants to think about it. For now, in that moment, they are together and it doesn't matter what is happening outside their world.