I was in a foul mood when we arrived home, but with all of my effort I played it off as if nothing had happened. But knowing me, that wouldn't work.
"Hey." Edward cooed, taking me into a loving hug intent with ownership.
"Uh, hi." I muffled through his shirt which by the way was saturated in the most overbearing aftershave. You'd think he'd be smart enough to think of how strong our scent was, but that was just wrong.
I pulled myself away from his body like a dog who'd sniffed nail polish, which earned me a confused and hurt glare.
"Sorry, you just smell strong." He sniffed his shirt and didn't seem to be bothered in the slightest. He shrugged his shoulders and continued watching me with curiosity.
"You're the one that smells strong." He stepped closer to sniff me, then cringed away.
I saw Alice's eyes shift anxiously meeting my own then just as quickly tore them away again back to Jasper.
"Must be human smell or something." I lied. "Which reminds me, I haven't fed in ages.. I'll be back soon." I made my subtle exit, leaving Edward slightly bemused.
After I'd hunted and was finally satisfied with my bloated tummy, I decided to go back home. Although I never looked forward being around anyone anymore. Rosalie knew too much, Jasper knew something and Edward was bound to find out from Alice's thoughts, eventually.
I sneaked into the house as discreetly as I could and attempted to find I quiet space. It sucked sharing a bedroom sometimes. Although it did make me wonder more about Edward, I couldn't suddenly just turn on him like this, but I was finally finding some excitement. Don't get me wrong, sex with him isn't all bad, but it's not exciting anymore. It worried me a bit. Would I not enjoy sex with him anymore? Or had I just been too caught up with these acts with Alice not to think about it? I pushed it out of my mind. Alice was just a game, she knew that, we both did. I think.
"Hey." Came a smooth, cool voice.
I turned from standing rather indiscreetly in the middle of the foyer to see Rosalie standing at the front door. I assumed she'd been hunting as well.
"Hi." I replied in mock niceness. Giving her a forced, sarcastic smile.
"Have fun shopping?"
"Why? Fantasising about me again? Really, Rose, give it a rest. I'm taken." Oh sarcasm, the most effective annoyance device.
"Perhaps you should remember that." Bitch, she had me there. I pretended to not be effected. We stood staring at each other for a while, tension building by the second.
"My question, is, why Alice?" She genuinely looked confused. It made me want to scoff.
"Then who else? Jasper? Emmett? You?" I snorted, her eyes narrowed into a glare.
"Well at least I'd be a better fuck." Oh no she didn't, I felt myself step forward as my defensive side kicked in.
"What makes you think that?" She mirrored me, stepping slightly closer. She was still taller than me, but not by much. Not enough to intimidate me. Well, maybe a bit.
"Trust me. I just know."
"No, if you're so confident about it then just tell me." Yeah that's right, I'm not anyone's little bitch, I stood in front of her now, practically nose to nose, inches away. My voice hushed but the meaning and intent was still lethal as ever.
"Don't get too excited. Wouldn't wanna cheat on your girlfriend now."
"Don't get too imaginative, wouldn't wanna get too turned on by the thought." Our banter only became more heated, too bad for her it was merely amusing to me. She actually started to look angry.
"Watch what you say. Remember I could choose to tell anyone at any time. So you better keep me pleased." I couldn't help but extract a sexual innuendo out of her little speech, but maybe it was just the sudden intoxicating closeness I felt between our bodies or the rising intensity in her voice.
Whatever it was it was wrong. Like everything else in the past few days, damn lack of self control. Stupid damn newborn instincts. I wondered how much longer I could use that excuse.
"So how do you like to be pleased?" I asked with a hint of ridicule in my tone.
She took a dangerous step towards me now, so that our bodies touched and our noses almost brushed. I ignored the heat gathering between my legs, it was so wrong. Fuck my taboo fetish.
"You'll find out." She whispered, and for a moment of delirious dizziness I could have sworn I saw her eyes hover over my lips before she disappeared into nothingness a second later.
I stood in that spot for a good moment, almost frozen in shock. If I had known being a vampire meant this, I would have ran the fuck away and never stopped running. This was madness.
"Bella?" I heard Edward call from the bottom of the stairs.
Ah, shit fuck.
"Yeah?" I put on my sweetest voice and most innocent face.
"Oh there you are." He smirked and walked calmly towards me. I actually didn't mind his normality after the crazy events of the past two days.
"I wanted to ask you about something." His tone became serious. I froze again in shock, the first thing that came to mind was Alice. I was so glad he couldn't read my mind.
"And what is that?" I asked. I could sense his nervousness, something was wrong. I could have ran, I even may have contemplated it until he opened his mouth to speak again, and after what he said, screw running, I wanted to barge through the wall and fly away.
"I wanted to do something.. special for tomorrow night." He couldn't even look me in the eye. Jesus, I could not stand his awkwardness when it came to sex. No wonder I was so easy when it came to Alice, there's no talking about it or awkwardness, just fire.
"Oh.." I said as if I'd understood him. He smiled nervously, I almost rolled my eyes.
"And you're telling me becauseee?"
"Well we just haven't.. you know.." He held out his hands in a completely random gesture. "In a while." Just say it you pussy, we haven't fucked in a while, yes because I've been fucking Alice. I slapped my thoughts.
"Yeah. Sure, well we'll-" I held out my hands in his previous gesture. We shared an awkward laugh. It was as if we hardly knew each other anymore. Maybe the change changed more than my looks and eating habits.
I was the first to break the silence by walking away with my eyebrows slightly raised. Weird shit's going on lately I tell ya.
Now I would have to prepare myself for Edward, I thought of the lingerie bought by Alice and thought on it for almost a whole minute. Sometime inside of me didn't want to tarnish it by letting Edward see me in it, it seemed odd, like he wouldn't appreciate it in the right way.
I found myself knocking on Alice's door. "Come in." She called.
I opened the door and saw her sitting at her desk, presumably working on some art piece. She turned and faced me, she knew it would be me, I could see it in her eyes. I suppose you come to expect it though, with a psychic. Now that I wondered about it, she hadn't seemed to have had any visions lately, or not that I was aware of, I wondered if I should ask her about it.
"Yes?" She asked coldly.
"Whoa what's up with the attitude?" She folded her arms and turned away on her wheelie chair. I should have been annoyed, but she looked cute when she was angry.
"Nothing." She murmured.
"God, you're hopeless at hiding your feelings."
"I must have learnt it off you." My eyebrows creased as I watched her, confusion wrought all over my face. She didn't look at me, she only did that if she was really angry.
"Any reason you're here?" She asked distantly.
"Well yeah but I can't talk about it now." Immature, but true.
"Is this to do with your visions? Can't you see things anymore?" She laughed at my ignorance then swung around again with a twisted smile on her face that showed anything but joy.
"It's what I can see." She stated pointedly.
The large, open room around me suddenly grew a lot smaller and more cluttered.
"W-what did you see?" My voice shook embarrassingly.
"Your conversations with Rosalie and Edward and-"
"And?" Her eyes clenched shut and she seemed to be struggling with something before they snapped back open and were full of a different emotion that I assumed to be resentment, but I couldn't be sure.
"Nothing." That always meant something. Something too unbelievable to say. I wanted to know, but then again it could have been something bad.
"Fine. But I don't see what's so bad about what Rosalie and Edward said."
"Oh that's none of my business, just have sex with everyone in the family, how moral."
"Okay for one, Edward is my fiance' I can fuck him all I like and two, if you think I'd ever screw with Rosalie then you've got some serious issues." I only realised I'd come so close to towering over her that I was almost on top of her now. I think I have proximity problems.
She sniffed with bitter laughter and shook her head whilst looking down. "How about this?" She spat, standing up against me now, and even though she was shorter she was still scary as shit. "One, you wont be using me for sex anymore and two, good luck getting an orgasm from Edwards soft cock." Then she physically pushed me back a few metres as to throw me out of the room but I was too strong. I gathered myself and stood up with pride.
"You know what's the funniest part of this?" I rhetorically asked her. "You, acting as if you don't get off on what we're doing. I see it in your eyes, I hear it in your moans, I feel it in the scratches on my back and the wetness between your legs-"
"Stop it!" She whispered, shifting her eyes as if people would hear. "There is nothing between us as of now." I just couldn't believe her. Maybe I should just let her wait and figure it out.
"Fine. But we both know how long that will last-"
"Bella. You're getting married for christs sake-"
"You are married for christs sake!" I tried to keep my voice quiet but now she was just being a hypocrite.
"That's why I'm ending it." She said desperately, and then I realised I couldn't continue doing this. The torment was too much for me to watch. I watched her eyes dance with sparkling diamonds, and wished that they were for me to look into. But fate works in evil ways. We were meant to be best friends, that's it.
But if that was the truth, then why, every time I look at her to I feel more alive than I ever have looking at Edward? I forced myself to believe it was just the context of our affair.
"Okay." I admitted finally. "You're right, you always were. This was never going to work." I tried to keep the rejection out of my voice and demeanour but I just couldn't. It felt heartbreaking to be doing this, again. But this time it felt worse because I knew it'd be the final judgement.
We stood for what seemed days. Just looking at each other. I took the time to explore her heart wrenching beauty for the last time in my current frame of mind. I knew if I looked any longer I wouldn't be able to let it go. So I looked away, and so did she. I knew we felt the same.
I turned to leave, but a soft tug on my wrist stopped me, my stomach lurched and I reluctantly turned around only to have my lips captured in a soft and lasting kiss. The feeling it gave me reminded me why I didn't want to kiss her earlier on. The worst thing I ever did was pull away, and seeing her face fall.
'I-I'm sorry." I wanted to cry, but no tears would come. Her hand was still grasped around my wrist and the thought of her lips against mine was more tempting than anything I'd ever felt before. Her expression broke my heart a million times over. She was pleading, but also questioning me, but I had no answers and I couldn't comply. She was fucking with my emotions, I couldn't take it.
I pulled my wrist from her grasp and then left the room before my body could drag me back in there and do something I would regret.
I fell to the floor, my fists pulling at my hair as everything inside of me fell apart. I begged for tears, or some form of outlet, but nothing came.
"What the hell are you doing?" My head shot up, and I was sure the rage in my eyes would be enough to kill that blonde bitch on the spot but she just stood there looking down at me.
My fists remained clenched as I stood to my feet, watching her intently, hoping she'd show some kind of fear or at least remorse for what a bitch she was. But there was nothing, only her dead, black eyes. I'd make her fucking feel something alright, with my fucking fist to her face.
Before I could refrain my anger my fist plummeted into her face cracking her beautiful features. But before I could comprehend what I'd done and who to, I felt a force twice as hard as my own punch back into my now broken face. It took seconds to recover, but my anger only grew. We both stood in fighting stance, waiting for the other to attack, I saw no fear in her eyes and I know she saw none in mine.
Our eyes were in an unwavering battle, I didn't dare look away or even blink. I felt my lip curl and small growl emit from behind my gritted teeth.
My sadness about Alice and anger for Rosalie imploded in a cataclysmic moment as I threw my hands around Rosalie's neck and kneed her in the stomach so that she fell back onto the floor with myself now straddling her as I raised my arm to show her once and for all what a bitch I could be.
But before I could, someone yanked my arm away and I was pulled back onto my feet, allowing Rosalie to stand free and snarl at me before she turned and walked away. I gave her a warning look, this wasn't nearly over then turned to see the sorry ass who'd prevented my revenge.
Edward. None other, of course.
"Thanks but I was handling that fine on my own." I pulled my arm back and went to find her, but his hand fell on my shoulder and spun me around.
"Bella, stop it!" My mind involuntarily flashed back to moments before when Alice had uttered those words. Hers stung more, but his words reminding me of her hurt equally as much if not more.
"Fuck off." I spat. "And don't touch me." I slapped his hand away aggressively and stormed off. He obviously knew what was good for him because he didn't follow me.
Now it was time to finish what I'd started. I didn't even knock as I entered her room, and it seemed she was expecting me because she was standing with her feet shoulder length apart, both arms to her sides with her fists clenched and she did not look happy to say the least.
I slowly closed the door behind me so enhance my intimidating facade. Then turned on the spot to face her. I took in her appearance as we stood in deadly silence and as always she looked 'perfect'. With her perfect hair, perfect face, perfect body, God damn her perfect fucking body, don't even get me started, and I hated that it appealed to me, how could it not? Fuck me dead I was attracted to her, in every sickening way possible, and I despised her for it.
I despised that hitting her wouldn't achieve anything, and that I wasn't doing it for any reason other than for my own twisted sadomasochism.
It frustrated me that I didn't know if she knew this or not, and worse that I didn't know whether I wanted her to know or not. Either way, knowing I had no sexual connection with Alice anymore, set sail for a new adventure, one more dangerous and stormy. One that may physically harm me worse than my previous venture, but could never emotionally harm me as Alice had, because there were no feelings, only physical attraction.
It felt like forever we stood there, and I wondered how or why she had not spoken, but it didn't matter to me.
"So you got into a fight with your fuck buddy?" She asked, her face hardly changing as she spoke and her tone stayed completely undetectable. She was a master of mind games, which I let her play.
"A mutual agreement." I corrected. It earned no angered response.
"Of what?" If only she knew I played this game too.
"That's for only us to know." She laughed, oh so slightly and I relished in her devious smirk. I let it seduce me, along with all the other elements of her charm.
"Perhaps you should recall our own agreement." Her movement caught me off guard and she began to walk towards me, I pretended to feel intimidated, but let myself want her closeness. I resented myself in that moment, so I had nothing to lose.
"Fucking newborns, you will go to any lengths to get what you desire and then pity yourself." I heard nothing besides her vindictive tone and felt nothing but the desire she'd accused me of. I wanted her angrier and I wanted to be treated like shit, because I did pity myself, and I deserved it. Her anger only turned me on, as did her body which now wasn't as close as it was before.
I thought of Alice and I thought of Edward, two people I'd ruined everything with, the two most important people to me. Rosalie would never betray her mate as I did to mine though, and I'd only be ruining another relationship, but nothing could deter the determination my instincts felt as they fed on the sight, sound, and smell of her seductive charm. Now I wanted to touch and taste it.
Without any preconceived thoughts my body lurched forward, my hands latched onto her silky, blonde hair and pulled it without mercy as I pressed my lips angrily against hers. I felt the fire again and my deluded thoughts only went further. Though she didn't kiss back, this only encouraged me. She grabbed me by the hips, electrocuting my nerves as she drove me into the wall glaring daggers into my non existent soul, her eyes were so full of repulsion, but I knew we were on equal ground in both aspects, I could see the desire swimming in her black eyes, unlike before when they were dead.
I was so used to being the dominant one that the switched role made me realise how gratifying and sexy it can be to let someone fuck you without mercy, and I knew I would get it hard.
"How does Alice fuck you?" She whispered, her voice stinging with spite.
"I fuck her." I answered shamefully. This widened her malicious smile, making me crave everything she was planning to do to me and more.
She pressed her body hard against mine and began thrusting herself against my hips. My head fell back in pleasure, opening my neck to her skilful mouth. There were no soft beginnings with Rosalie, only horny impatience, which already earned an unintentional moan from me.
She worked her mouth expertly, like it was an art. Her lips hastily attacked my neck, as her hands began wandering my body. It was all so much at once, I could hardly take it, her tongue found my neck, and so did her teeth, she lightly nipped all the right places, knowing just where to make me jump or gasp, sending shock waves directly into my lower body.
Her lips made their way to my ear as her hands made their way onto my thigh, desperately scratching and tugging at my pants, then unexpectedly roughly cupping and rubbing the outside of my pants, feeling the building warmth and wetness between my legs as her hips still rocked against me. She knew what she was doing, and I wanted more. I hadn't been fucked properly in so long.
"Do you want me to fuck you?" She teased, rubbing my throbbing clit with every involuntary rock of my hips. I wondered if she'd fucked girls before, or if she just knew things.
"Do-you-want-me-to-fuck-you?" She demanded impatiently. But I wanted to make her angry. She restrained all contact with my body and I made the mistake of attempting to pull her close to me again, but my arm was violently hit away.
"Yes!" I finally admitted. "Yes, please.." I said more desperately. "Please.." she waited extra long to compensate for my lack of response, and I became slightly annoyed at how well she knew to tease.
"Oh God, please, fuck me.." She didn't look at me with love or care as Edward or Alice would, instead I could see I was merely a toy for her own pleasure. But I was fine with it, I wanted it, so, so badly.
Again she touched my body and I felt the need for her grow between my legs with every second that passed.
"Take your pants off." She stated, simply but coming from her I wouldn't dare argue.
I peeled them off in an instant in the hope she'd cut to the chase. She got to her knees, to my surprise and ran her amazing marble hands along my thighs and almost nuzzled my pussy as she slowly ran over my panties with her lips, then bit the elastic and let it snap. There was nothing sexier than seeing her on her knees and her head between my thighs, I could have cum from one lick, but I knew she'd make me wait.
She grasped my ass as she buried her face deeper into my groin, and sexier than anything I'd ever seen or heard before I heard her moan ever so lightly as she licked the outside of my wet panties. The noise mixed with the sensation excited me. Usually Edward would just get to fucking me, but I realised in that moment I'd never experienced the excruciating pleasure of foreplay.
The heat of the moment swept all rational thinking away and my hands clutched her hair to apply any more possible pressure between my legs, I was so desperate that I trust my hips as if fucking someone to produce some kind of friction. Even though she was below me she still assumed dominance, the minute I began attempting to control her I felt a sharp slap hit my ass, hitching my breath and awakening the beast within. I wanted to hear her sweet moan again, and her raspy, horny voice.
"You're so wet." She said, letting a finger run along the wet patch that had formed since she'd began teasing me.
"Lick me out.." I gasped, which was intended to be far more demanding than the desperate plea it turned out as.
I'd never said succumb to such things before, only demanded them of others, so right now was a whole new experience.
"Say please."
"Please!" she waited again. "Please lick me out.." I begged, and finally she ripped my underwear off as if she'd been waiting as impatiently as me.
As soon as she threw them in a random direction I felt my whole body stiffen and my fists clench in her hair and her smooth tongue slid along my pussy, soaking up all of my cum. She attacked it as soon as she made contact, I don't think I'd ever felt so close to orgasm so quickly ever before in my life. She began straight on my clit, licking, then sucking then biting, so intensely I could have sworn she was enjoying it almost as much as me.
I felt her tongue move down into my hole, and at first I was shocked but the pure feeling of ecstasy I felt upon her tongue entering my cunt was more pleasurable than a penis had ever felt. I began to thrust again, pushing her tongue further inside of me as her nails dug painfully into my ass, the further it went in the more I began to moan, but I knew I couldn't, people were home. This was more than risky. I bit down on my lip and breathed out of my nose, but it was still obvious how close I was getting. I wanted to know what it was like to taste my cum off her tongue, only to further torture myself I pulled her up by her hair, which by the way gave me great satisfaction then connected with her wet lips.
I let my tongue explore her mouth earlier than what was polite, but I couldn't restrain myself. It tasted so good off her tongue, I devoured every last bit in a desperate frenzy. Our tongues were in a battle that never seemed to end, but I wasn't complaining, the girl was right, she could fuck and she could certainly kiss.
Her fingers somehow throughout our make out session found their way inside of me. I accidentally bit down on her tongue causing her to cringe and push her fingers angrily and painfully all the way inside of me.
I couldn't even comprehend how many were inside of me, only that it'd been so long since I'd had that penetration from someone else other than myself.
"You're so tight." She rasped against my ear. I pulled her hair again, it was the only thing keeping me sane as she fucked me into oblivion. Her fingers were so fast, and so goddamn deep, I was so wet that I could hear my cum as she fucked me, I felt my insides convulse like crazy around her fingers, I was completely throbbing, I even felt my body begin to twitch and shake.
"Faster.." I moaned, and this time I heard her moan back, and I knew it was real because it sounded so restrained and high, like she was trying so hard to keep it hidden. Fuck, it was hot.
I felt her thrust against my thigh, rubbing her cunt under her skirt against my bare leg. My vision left me as everything turned black, I could feel how wet she was, and she so desperately thrust against me, she was going to cum and I was seconds away from it myself. I felt her hot breath on my shoulder, she kept fucking me mercilessly, I couldn't see a thing and I felt nothing but pleasure, it was like an orgasm that wouldn't end even though I knew it hadn't started. It was almost painful how good it felt.
"Keep going.." I urged, meaning both the fucking and the thrusting, I didn't know which was making me more horny.
I heard her whimper and moan, so unlike any noise I could have imagined her making. It was so real that I couldn't take it anymore, her teeth found my shoulder and bit down, hard. I couldn't let her cum without my help. My fingers found their way inside her soaked underwear, and she didn't attempt to stop me. My own body reacted with hers as three fingers slid so easily inside of her dripping pussy, we were both breathing, biting and whimpering in order to stop from crying out, and after waiting for so long I finally exploded. Initially I thought I'd passed out but Rosalie's scratching down my back made me realise I was still conscious, if the first wave of pleasure wasn't enough there was a second that was even more powerful.
"Fuck.." I breathed, I couldn't make any louder sound, her fingers were still inside me and fucking me and I realised she was cumming with me.
My head fell back followed by nonsensical thoughts which came into my head as I rode wave after wave of pleasure, forgetting completely where I was or what I was doing.
"Alice.." I moaned. "Fuck me.." But the fucking stopped and after a few more seconds I came to the sickening realisation of my mistake.
Just like that the hatred was back in Rosalie's eyes more than ever and for once I felt bad for causing it. I didn't know what to even say, I just knew I'd fucked up.