Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.
Note: I would be using their character names, mostly. This is an AU fic—a very AU one. Also, I would like to apologize early for any out of character behaviour and/or poor plotting.
..
"Let us help Elizaveta prepare for tonight's party, oui?" The Frenchman suddenly announces then walks with the (embarrassed) other back inside the complex.
--
Retreating to the couch at one side of the room, the Englishman has reluctantly found himself lucky enough to have escaped being questioned on the spot; he was reluctant to admit it since it was Françis who helped him out of the situation.
As it turns out, Elizaveta occasionally works for Feliciano by taking photos of a number of his models. Well it's not much of a surprise to William since she is a freelance photographer, but he thought that her last project would 'take at least ten centuries to grow tired of'.
Anyways, it just so happens to be that Feliciano has been invited over and brought along with him: Ludwig and Kiku. Nothing seems to be much of a problem since they all knew who William is, yes; it's just that when the Italian had called the Englishman: "William", Elizaveta instantly asked why it's not "George".
How is he supposed to remember every damn name he uses—let alone know every friend and relative of a person whom he has no trouble lying to?
To make a long story short, Françis shamelessly announced that William has this weird quirk of using his 'intimate' name—may he succumb to the demons from the darkest corners of hell —when introducing himself to women. Fortunately enough, no more questions have been asked and all curiosity becomes satisfied (though an incredulous look appears on Ludwig's face).
The Englishman sighs to himself and does not notice Kiku sitting down beside him. William glances at the can of beer in his hand and looks at it as if unsure whether to drink from it or not; he decides to take a small sip but is careful to make sure not to be tempted to finish it and go for another (this is his first can, even—how strong his will is!). He'd rather not have two consecutive hangovers to deal with.
His eyes drift over to a small pile of empty cans and long-before finished wine bottles, and he takes another tiny nip whilst pretending that he is drinking a large mouthful of warm beer; he's failing.
In the room, there are at least eight or nine people inside. Aside from the people he thought of, William was able to meet Elizaveta's ex-husband, Roderich, and sees a familiar face known best as one of Françis' old friends (and is actually Ludwig's brother), Gilbert.
"It's a small world…" the Englishman comments to himself with a slight musical tone that comes with it. Kiku has heard what is said but knows that William does not notice him, so he does nothing but look at the others alongside the taller man and silently agree.
Françis and Gilbert are currently harassing Roderich (sexually by one and in a mocking manner by the other). Elizaveta was just having a conversation with an underwear-clad Feliciano then has turned her attention to Gilbert and is now beating him into a bloody pulp—Françis steps aside, knowing better.
Feliciano is now complaining about the room still being too hot and tries to take off the last remaining bit of clothing he has, but the Italian is soon stopped by the remarkably sober Ludwig; sighing to himself (either in another feel of relief or annoyance), the German man opens and finishes his hundredth can of beer while trying to keep a close eye on the carefree brunet.
Feliciano soon whines about being too cold and somehow manages to take and wear the shirt of a red-faced Ludwig. Gilbert, who seems to have miraculously healed, is now shouting words in drunken German (profanities, no doubt); more words and obnoxious laughter is heard from him as Feliciano carelessly sits on Ludwig's lap and sleeps against the man's bare chest—a sudden flash of a camera easily tells that Elizaveta has taken a photo.
It is then that William finally understands why the woman finds time to work for the oblivious Italian.
How sly of her; in her own words: "a chance that's right in front of you".
--
The hours of repetitive incidents consisting many more of Gilbert's teasing, Elizaveta punching the former, and Roderich being the whole cause of it has stretched far enough for the Englishman to call it a night. As he is about to stand up, Feliciano, who awoke only a few minutes ago, walks past his side and talks to the now noticed Kiku— "Ve ve~ Let's go to your place, ok?"
William stiffens slightly as the Japanese man looks to him with a blank look on his face; if one looks more closely at that expression, they could see that Kiku is asking: 'Is it alright with you?'. Without even having the chance to reply to the thought-to-be-discreet question, Feliciano also turns his head to look at the taller man. "Is something wrong?" the Italian asks innocently.
"N-nothing's the matter. It's just that…well, you see…"
"Are you living together?"
Out of nowhere, Françis—"So this is the one you were with last night, hmm? I knew that I saw him somewhere before," a mischievous smile appears on his face (much to William's chagrin). Feliciano is left slightly agape and slowly looks back and forth between the now blushing Kiku and the Englishman; he breaks into a wide smile and hugs the smallest man—"Oh, Kiku, how come you never told me? I'm so happy for you!"
Before they knew it, William and Kiku are pushed out of Elizaveta's apartment.
The Englishman dares to look behind and catches a glimpse of the only woman inside smiling (rather creepily) at them. Françis, as if pushing people into rooms is something that's absolutely a must to do, leads them into the other two's own apartment. He doesn't stop there, though; he continues to guide them towards the bedroom.
"Have fun, you two," the Frenchman says perversely before the door is completely closed on them. William buries his face in one hand while Kiku is looking at a random corner of the room.
--
Françis sits on the foot of the stairs and pulls out a small notebook—he opens it and flips through the pages of scrawled and not-so-scrawled French (some are in English and other languages that he has little knowledge of understanding). He stops at one of the many dog-eared pages and skims the information in the badly lit stairway.
The man takes out a pen from his pocket as he reads over a list of names under a boldly written: 'Suspects'. He goes over a number of names already overlapped with lines and scribbles that obviously mean that they have been crossed out—
The name: 'Antonio' that was once encircled is now being scribbled out.
Françis suddenly stands and walks up to the bedroom at the top of the steps; he opens the door to find the two sleeping on the bed, but they are facing towards opposite sides and are very much apart from each other—how odd.
The Frenchman, thinking that they must have had a lover's spat since before the party, looks back at his notebook and writes: 'Arthur' at the bottom of the list and encircles it. He sighs to himself. Looking back at the two, he soon finds the Englishman pulling Kiku into a loose embrace. Françis nearly laughs in amusement and is already on his way out of the apartment.
Walking away from the complex, the Frenchman finally decides to give his co-worker some more time to him and his lover… before poor "William" gets sentenced to life imprisonment, anyways.
--
Inside the bedroom once more, Arthur no longer has Kiku in his embrace. Instead, he is facing the ceiling whilst holding the other's hand. A few minutes later, the Englishman is sitting up (still intertwining hands with the smaller man). In a sleepy fashion, he looks at Kiku with unconscious, half-opened eyes and kisses the sleeping other. As if struck with a deadly curse, he falls back into sleep but embraces the other again…a bit more tightly, though.
The smaller man did not move an inch, nor has he been stirred awake. A few seconds later, he is snuggling towards the other behind him.
..
Françis knew all along. Ha ha.