Chapter 11: Aw crap!
Disclaimer: The following is a non-profit fan based fan fiction. Mega Man is owned by Capcom and Keiji Inafune. Please support the official release.
The resistance fighters did know of a way into the official royal palace where Adamus ruled from, but the path was treacherous. There were many trap doors, attacking toys, joke traps, regular traps, rusty traps, broken traps, rope traps and traps that were pointless. Bass suspected that he knew exactly who was the master of this maze that led to Adamus's back door, but he didn't want to speak it for fear that it would be true because he said it. Of all the stupid, useless, Robot Masters that Wiley had created, Clown Man was way up their in terms of annoyance, maybe even higher than the little dweeb who was to freakin' hard to kill. The only good thing about stepping into Clown Man's lair as an intruder was the chance to destroy Clown Man, something that Bass would openly admit to fantasizing about as much as he did the death of Mega Man. If it weren't for not being able to kill Mega Man and the fact that he might actually have to go into the bastard-robot-who-shall-not-be-named's stage, Bass would have thought it was Christmas and nobody had told him.
"This is as far as we dare go," said his human guide as he stopped to wipe the sweat off his brow with the dirty handkerchief he had in his pocket. Every human around him seemed to be covered with filth. "It's too dangerous for any of us to go into there, especially as a large group."
"Wise, you'd only slow me down," said Bass as he motioned for Treble to take a sniff. He grimaced when he saw the purple blinking in the dog's eyes. "Shit, Clown Man."
"He should be no problem for you, after all you did defeat Golden Man," said his guide, a worm who lacked the courage to do what is necessary. Even the annoying dweeb would fight when he knew he had to because he had courage, unlike these humans who just wanted to survive. Then again they were weak and tired, it was only right that they just tried to keep up their living under independence from the robots despite their flawed human forms. What could be done about humans?
"I fear no robot because I am the superior, the only problem with this one is that he cheats," said Bass as eh started to observe the entrance, expecting some trap to be laid right from the beginning. "He is a nuisance that I would love to wipe from this earth, but I would much rather not have to step on his domain where he is, for the brief moment, the ruler of. Plus that asshole would have some ridiculous prank."
"With the way you talk I thought no prank could ever harm you," laughed the guard only for his laughter to be cut short by a glare from Bass.
"It's not the harm, it's the annoyance," said Bass as he removed his helmet, something he rarely did, to reveal the white, unkempt hair beneath it. "My hair used to be the same shade of purple as my cheek until I accidentally walked into one of the wrong sections of Clown Man's area. This place is most certainly full of traps, but I'm confidant I can avoid them now."
"Why is that?"
"I was only two years old in my production when that happened, now I'm faster, stronger and more agile than I was then. Now I'm going to show him how much of a joke this stage is."
"Actually Clown Man was scrapped by Mega Man two months ago," said the guide. Bass's eye twitched at this.
"F**kin hate him."
Despite the fact that its master had died some time ago, the maze was still running functionally much to the displeasure of Bass who now faced the annoyance of the stage without the benefit of being able to destroy Clown Man. He made a mental note to strangle the blue dweeb to death as soon as he was done ripping out Adamus's liver for making him go through this crap and he was most definitely going to get Dr. Light to make further upgrades to Roll's programming so her combat functions would prevent this crap from happening. Dr. Light would do it because Bass was going to make him an offer he couldn't refuse. Bass ducked under another spinning blade as can of shaving cream popped up, but before it could spray him Bass had crushed it in his hands. He cursed everything as he ran down the room shooting at the turrets that were either shooting weak buster blasts or nerf balls. God help Mega Man once Bass got out, actually scratch that, God better not get in Bass's way when he got out.
"I'll kill that little shit," cursed Bass as he jumped through the glass which was made very thick, but not thick enough to stop his armor from getting through. "You are lucky you have a cute ass, creampuff, or else I wouldn't be here."
A blush spread across his face as he realized what he had just said. Did I just sa-well f**k me. The next corridor was filled with sniper joes that had probably been left down there in case anyone ever ventured into the maze. He must be getting near the end if the sniper joes were there, unless of course they were there just as another obstacle. Bass wouldn't put it past the useless excuse for a Robot Master.
"Bass where are you," came a familiar and infuriating voice over the intercom, the last voice he wanted to hear at that moment, the voice of the blue dweeb.
"I'm sorry this comm. Is reserved for useful people or robots so I'm afraid it's not operating right now," said Bass sarcastically hoping Mega Man would get the hint. No such luck.
"I'm here to back you up, Roll is my sister as well," said Rock over the comm., his breathing told Bass that he was rushing to catch up.
"Quit with the breathing, you don't need it and it just doesn't sound right over the communications line," replied Bass a bit angrily as he allowed himself to slow his pace while deciding whether he was going to strangle the dweeb on sight or throw him into a trap. "Also I don't think it would be safe for you to come here, in all fairness I'm debating on how I should kill you right about now. You can still come, but then you should know that I will most likely kill you on sight or kill you later."
"What the hell is your problem," asked Mega Man, for the first time in his life he was actually showing aggression…besides the times he considered killing Wiley, but then again, who didn't? "I'm here to save my sister and all you can think about is your stupid notion of being the better robot. Look, you know what, take the stupid title, I'll admit that you are better than me in every way shape and form if it means you can just move on with your life."
"What the hell, when did you just get balls," asked Bass, a bit astonished at the sudden appearance of spine. "Did you just see Dr. Light for an upgrade of balls or was it that scientist –looking guy I saw you with that did that? I ask this because there is no way that you would ever speak to me the way you have just spoken to me. This isn't about proving that I'm better than you because I've already proved that by lasting longer than you have and I will continue to do it as I kill Adamus, but right now I have a different bone to pick with you. I am pissed because here I am running through this god forsaken stage and the one joy that I could get from this day, besides seeing a golden statue erected in my honor, is killing Clown Man. You, on the other hand, have denied me this joy by already killing that bastard so now I am pissed because you took away my fun."
"Killed Clown Man, what the heck are you talking about? I've never even been here before, i tried blasting through the front door."
"That's probably your only redeeming quality is that you at least have the nerve to face your challenges," said Bass as he jumped over two spinning saw blades. "But you still don't understand that it is more difficult to burst through the front door right into all the defenses that they've set up to kill you with. I mean I guess it would be unfair to burst into the backdoor of Wiley's fortress when he never protects his front door, but this Adamus isn't playing around, you're going to have to get your mind right. Also, I think we've just been led into a trap."
"Yeah the human guide I saw you come in with seemed in a hurry to get a communication to Clown Man," laughed Mega Man and consequently pissing Bass off. No one laughs to Bass, no one!
"You know what useless douche, f**k you and everybody that lives in your house," shot Bass as he blew a hole right through ten layers of walls. "I'm taking a short cut!"
"I see your still as angry as ever," came an annoying voice over an intercom, a voice that could only belong to bastard robot that was making him run this ridiculous gauntlet. "I worked too hard on this maze to let you go, so I'm going to have to make it harder for you. How about I bring in a little incentive to keep you going."
"There are only two things that I want, to get to the other side and to kill you," replied Bass.
"But I'm not at the end of the maze, I'm right in the middle of it, on the proper path," laughed Clown Man, that irritating laugh that made Bass want to punch something. And wouldn't you know it, Mega Man just happened to show up right then.
"Bass we have to keep movin-," said Mega Man before he was cut off by a punch to the face. "Ow, what the hell did you do that for you bastard?"
"All work and no play," replied Bass as he started to run through the holes he made. "I'm not walking into your traps again, so wait here for me and I promise your death will be made as quick as possible. If you are not here, I'm going to chase you down...and then I think I'm going to have some fun. Dweeb if your done bitching and moaning there, I'll need you to keep up with me, we're saving Roll and I'M killing Adamus."
"Wow, even when we both had to team up to fight King you didn't tell me you needed my help," said Mega Man as he rubbed his slightly hurt cheek with a stupid grin on his face.
"Don't get misty-eyed Francine, you're designated specifically as meat shield," declared Bass as he blew an even bigger hole through the walls that reached what appeared to be the exit."And I'm only giving you the honor of being my personal meat shield because nothing better is near by, such as a turd or a turd farmer. Roll needs us right now and we're wasting time here!"
"Wait a minute, are you actually sounding concerned for Roll," asked Mega Man as he stepped in front of Bass, not allowing him to move another inch. It was very annoying to say the least. "How do you feel about her, Bass? I've told you Roll likes you, heck she might even want you to reform more than I wish to, but I also don't want you to hurt her feelings. If you hurt my sister I'll never forgive you!'
"I'm not interested in hurting your sister, ever, but...I don't know how I feel about her," replied Bass a bit shyly and with what appeared to be a slight blush on his cheeks. Now this shocked Rock, never would he have imagined that he would see Bass caught off guard and looking so...meek. Could this be the opportunity he had been waiting for, the moment when Bass would change his evil ways and Roll would find someone for her. "I don't hate her or find her annoying like I find most other things, but...I'm not used to feeling this many emotions. It's odd that I would have this need to protect her and to interact with her, but I'm also not big on playing the hero all the time. Whether or not what I feel for is love...I do not have sufficient knowledge in my emotional experiences to determine if what this feeling is is love at all or something else. I...I...I I I I I I I 624385934753427439437845443..."
"Bass what's wrong," asked Mega Man as he quickly caught the fallen Robot Maste who had a somewhat blank expression on his face and even his eyes, which were usually blazing with fiery pride and just a minute ago filled with confusion and uncertainty. Something was terribly wrong. "Bass what's going on."
"What the hell, why are you holding me," asked a now confused Bass who found himself in a curious embrace from his archenemy and it appeared as if his archenemy was planning on kissing him. "I know I was sharing the rare gift of my emotions but trust me, the only thing I feel for you is a need to kill, now get your hands off me before I tear you apart!"
"I'm sorry you just seemed to be going blank there for a second," said Rock as he allowed Bass to regain his footing. "Are you sure you're alright, you appeared to be having some problem, almost as if you were suffering from a malfunction."
"I'm fine...I don't know why that happened, but I'll have to run a diagnostics test later," said Bass as he steady his footing and looked at Mega Man. "If you tell anyone about this I swear I'm gonna kill you."
