Churros and thanks to my Beta TellMeTheTruth. She tells me when to kill the "ands".
Again, I don't own Twilight. I do own 4 books with back covers that have only been read once each.
Chapter 2: Consequences of Inaction
"If you control it, you can make good use of it. But if you lose control, it will kill you." ~ Jose Torres
My nose was burning. Why was it burning when Lauren had hit me in the jaw? My eyes were still closed and I heard a multitude of voices arguing with each other above me. The burning continued and felt as though someone had lit a match in each of my nostrils. I heard the gruff voice of Jimmy above me calling my name asking me to open my eyes but I couldn't be bothered enough to do it for him. I let out a weak groan. The voices grew louder; this time I heard Emmett a little more clearly than Jimmy.
"Cricket, can you hear me? Come on, open your eyes for me, please." I've reduced a grown man to pet names and begging. He sounded desperate for any sign I could possibly give him. I suddenly realized once I opened my eyes, one look in them and Emmett would know that I'd thrown the match. I never could hide anything from him, he knew me too well and I could not take the look of disappointment I knew he would give me.
I tried to hold onto the sanctity the blackness previously offered. It became increasingly difficult as the burning in my nose raged on. My body was heavy and felt weighted down. My gloves must have been removed because someone was holding my hand, the death grip was anything but gentle. I wanted to free my hand of the vice and pull out those matches I was convinced had made a home in my nose. I allowed another groan, growing in volume and the voices above me quieted down a little waiting for my next sign. I squeezed the hand attached to mine and felt a squeeze back.
My eyelids were heavy as I struggled to open them, but once I committed, the burning in my nose lessened though it did not completely vanish. Blinking a few times at the sudden brightness I saw Carlisle pull his hand away from my face. He must have been the fire starter, it clicked in my brain; smelling salts.
"How long was I out for?" my voice was quite and my throat dry making it sound rough.
"Only a couple of minutes, we used the smelling salts after you didn't get up right away." Carlisle informed me from my left. I slowly looked around, Jimmy was next to Carlisle with a concerned look on his hard face and I worried for a second that he might call me out on my obvious attempt at sabotage. He didn't say anything to me so I allowed my eyes to continue their journey. The ref was next to Jimmy, he too didn't say anything, he looked unconcerned and walked away once he saw I was awake. Emmett was last, he hadn't released my hand, his eyes were pained and I finally understood what a colossal mistake I'd made.
"I'm sorry." I knew that I would have a lot of explaining to do and would undoubtedly receive a tongue lashing from Emmett just as soon as he knew I was alright.
"Sorry? That's not usually what a fighter says after waking up from a knock out punch. Let's not worry about that, we need to get you up and checked for a concussion. Emmett and I are going to help you up now, alright Bella?" Carlisle said taking charge of the situation. If possible, I felt even more guilty. Someone needed to give him a medal for the compassion and concern he gave away at no charge. He was still waiting for my response and all I could do is nod my head at him.
My upper body rose without the aid of my own strength. Feeling only slightly dizzy after being prone I pulled my knees up to show I was ready to stand. Once on my own two feet I heard polite clapping. Shit, how did I forget that we were being watched? I'd allowed myself to become a side show, for the second time tonight, how awesome. All eyes in the arena were on me as I continued to be supported by Carlisle and Emmett over to my corner.
Before I could seek refuge in the dressing area, the winner of our match needed to be announced. At this point, it was merely a formality, we all knew I was the loser. I looked up to see Lauren, pride and satisfaction heavily wafting off her person. She'd forgotten all about how I dominated the match and her little revelation right before I let her best me. I could not hold back my annoyance. I broke free of Emmett and Carlisle's hold and walked over to her on unsteady feet.
"I want a rematch!" I called out to her as strong hands grabbed a hold of me and stopped any further movement. Emmett was telling me to calm down as Lauren returned my challenge.
"You want me to beat your ass again? I look forward to it!" Her bravado was cut short as the announcer's voice filledhe arena over the crackling PA system.
I didn't bother to listen as they said her name. Nor did I watch as they lifted her arm over her head for the crowd to see. My hand was released by the ref and I desperately wanted to remove myself from the situation.
Avoiding any eye contact I exited the ring and all but ran to the fighter's dressing area. My brain, no longer fuelled by rage had decided to start producing coherent thoughts and suddenly I begin regretting my actions.
Carlisle's usual concern for one of his fighters was obvious. Jimmy's disbelief was easily seen by any who looked at him. However, it was Emmett's disappointment that was the most difficult for me to look at. I knew that I've hurt him by doing this. I can tell he is holding back his interrogation until we are alone, where we both know I will tell him whatever he wanted to know.
The dressing room was empty save for a few other women in various states of dress. Some were putting on their equipment in preparation for their upcoming matches. Others were quietly packing up their things but I could tell they were doing so slowly, I surmised they expect another meltdown and wanted to be here when it happened. Approaching my bench from earlier, I began to remove my hand wraps and hastily shoved them into my bag, not bothering to fold them up. I wanted to get out of here as fast as possible.
Jimmy, Carlisle and Emmett followed me into the dressing area and were quietly discussing something. Carlisle must had pulled the short straw because he was the one to approach me.
"Bella I just need to do a quick check on your neurovitals before you go," his voice was calm and soothing. Nodding my head I gave him my full attention. He checked my eyes with a light. "How is your head? Are you experiencing any dizziness or nausea?"
"I have a small headache but otherwise, I feel fine," I responded with honesty. He still looked concerned but nodded his head to Jimmy in reassurance.
"I'm certain you've only sustained a minor concussion. You can take Tylenol for the headache and get lots of sleep. Emmett you'll need to stay the night with Bella to wake her up for the next six hours to make sure she hasn't suffered anything more serious. Otherwise, I don't want you doing any training for a week to give your body the time it needs to recover from the concussion and I want you to stop by my office on Monday for another quick check, alright?" Carlisle turned to leave.
"A week? Carlisle, I can't not train for a week!" I looked back and forth between the three men standing in front of me my eyes pleading for the alternative decision that I knew wouldn't come.
"Sorry Swan, but the rules are the same for every one of my boxers. Now, would you like to talk about tonight's fight here or would you prefer to wait until tomorrow and come see me at the gym?" These were the first words Jimmy had spoken to me all night, the disappointment written on his face.
There was no way I wanted to discuss this train wreck of bad decisions with him anytime soon. However, before I could even voice my plan to see him the next day there was knock at the doorway and someone cleared their throat. I chanced a glance in the direction of the intruder with perfect timing. I didn't know him but the recognition on Emmett's face and the slimy smooth smile Jimmy was wearing told me exactly what I didn't want to know. The Major. Of course he would show up right now to witness my humiliation. Let this be the cherry topping to my night. We made eye contact for a brief second as he stood awkwardly in the doorway.
"Looks like we'll have to have this discussion later, come see me tomorrow, yeah?" Jimmy didn't even wait for my response as he swiftly left the room, I was grateful for the interruption of what would probably be a very long lecture on my failure tonight. Yes, that could definitely wait until tomorrow.
The Major stepped aside as Jimmy walked out of the dressing area and Carlisle followed behind. Before he following, he looked back at Emmett and I with what I only assumed to be pity. I hoped I managed make enough of an ass of myself to be an influence in his decision and tell Jimmy he no longer wished to train under him. It was the only thing that would make the disappointment in Emmett's eyes worth while.
"I'll let you finish getting dressed," Emmett's voice was quite and sad sounding. I didn't bother with a reply as I watched him leave in the same direction the others had gone only minutes ago.
Looking around, the room was now empty, all the other ladies must had left at one point or another. I changed out of my silk shorts and put on the jeans I arrived here in and quickly pulled my hoodie over my tank top and sports bra and packed up the rest of my equipment. My headache was starting to get worse and all I wanted to do is go home, shower and seek refuge under my blankets.
With my bag slung over one shoulder I approached Emmett. He was leaning against the wall, hands in his jacket pockets and one foot propped up on the wall.
"Hey, I'm ready to go whenever you are," I said, a few feet away from him.
"You don't want to stay and watch the rest of our team or any of the other fights in your weight class?"
"No, I'd really just like to go home and go to bed. My head is starting to hurt a bit more now that the adrenaline isn't pumping, if you don't mind. Unless you want to stay, I can just grab a cab home," I said shrugging my shoulders.
"Did you even listen to what Carlisle said in there?" His tone was tense as he pointed his thumb back in the direction of the dressing rooms. "I can't just abandon you and assume you'll be able to wake yourself up every hour," the double meaning of his words not lost on me. "If you want to leave, then let's go."
Emmett didn't wait for me as he started walking towards the door. Sighing, I followed behind him trying to avoid eye contact with anyone. I was lucky enough that there was another fight going on and most everyone was paying attention to that.
A loud whoop grabbed my attention. I regret the instant reflex as I looked up and spotted Lauren doing some sort of victory celebration with a herd of guys surrounding her. She smirked at me as we made eye contact.
I didn't even have the energy to be angry at her anymore, it was my decision after all to throw the fight. I should have been happy, I should have been a graceful loser, I should not have been feeling like I just let down my biggest supporter and best friend. However, I was not happy, I was a sore loser and I did let down my best friend, especially when he was there for me when I needed him.
The ride to my place was quiet. I sneaked glances in Emmett's direction, his face lacking that carefree look and easy grin I was so used to seeing. I hated that I had put him in this situation.
"Em…I'm really sorry I let you down tonight," my words sounded lame and pathetic even to me.
"Really, Bella? I don't even know what to say about that sorry excuse for a fight I witnessed." He wasn't holding back and I didn't argue because I knew I deserved every word he said. "You are better fighter than that. I just don't understand why? I mean, as it out of jealousy?"
"No, not jealousy. I was angry that Jimmy just left us on our own when someone bigger and better came along. I mean, I've been with Jimmy since I started boxing and you have been with him even longer than that. When you told me that he wasn't even going to be coaching me tonight, I was pissed. Isn't that what a coach is supposed to do?" I chanced a look at him, his eyes were on the road and his grip was tight on the steering wheel. "I just thought that if this new guy was here to see Jimmy's fighters and I didn't do well, it would reflect on him and he wouldn't want to join anymore."
"So where would that leave me, Bella? I was the one coaching you tonight, not Jimmy. If anything, your poor decision made me look like the bad coach." I could hear the hurt in his voice.
"I know it was a bad move on my part. I honestly didn't think about how much this would affect you. But if it means we won't be sidelined by some new guy then I'm not sorry about that. I am sorry I let you down though. If I had told you my plan what would you have done?"
"You know I would have tried to knock some sense into that stubborn head of yours," he said finally looking at me, his usual warm brown eyes were hard.
"Exactly my point Emmett. This way, Jimmy can't be pissed at you for knowing. It will all be on me when The Major decides to go with someone else," he sighed and pulled the car into the second reserved parking spot assigned to my townhouse beside my car.
We walked up the stairs and I unlocked the door and let us in. Emmett walked through the living room and into the kitchen as I made my way up the stairs to my bedroom. I turned on the bedside lamp as I passed by and walked into the ensuite. I used the little light afforded by the lamp, ignoring the harsh bright lights of the bathroom and turned on the shower.
My head was still pounding as I stripped down and stepped into the now hot and steamy water. I stoodd in the stream and let the warmth soothe my tired muscles, it did nothing for the beating my emotions had taken.
After I had washed up and towelled dry, I pulled on my favourite sleepwear, a t-shirt that once belonged to Emmett. It was familiar and soft and felt like a hug. I opened my bedroom door up so that Emmett didn't have to worry about it when he had to wake me up through the night. Just as I walked back to crawl into bed he was climbing up the stairs and entered my room holding a glass of water. He handed it to me and dropped two Tylenol into my other hand.
"Thanks," I said as I swallowed the medicine with a couple of sits of water. His consideration of my injury even though he was still upset at me made me feel even worse.
"Sure thing, Bells. Let's get some sleep so I can wake you up in an hour."
"Of course, I'll leave my door open for you."
"Alright, I'm gonna be in the spare room, that lumpy mattress is better than the lumpy couch downstairs," he joked breaking the tension.
"Night, Em. I love you. I'm sorry, you know I didn't mean for this to upset you, right?" I said as I hugged him.
"I know you are Cricket, love ya too," he smiled weakly, returning the hug. The mention of his nickname for me letting me know he had already forgiven me.
I've got a little preview to Chapter 3 for anyone who reviews!
Thanks for reading!
~cusher