Hello readers, Welcome to my first flashback. I had started this story with the gumption that I would take people's opinions and feedback and try to incorporate it into my style. However, no one really ever says anything about it. So …the result: I'm just going to do it my way. I already have the next one written and yes, lemons will be had. But I am holding it hostage unless more of you review. Sooo many people whore out my man and leave me with nothing. My decision will follow. Do the right thing people.

Everything always belongs to SM except the sexual tension between me and my native book boyfriend. I'm afraid that's all mine.

***************************************************Girls**************************************************************

~4 weeks earlier~

It was technically not just little Seth's coming out party, but we really didn't honor the fact that Leah had gone all hairy just two days before Seth did. I guess she was sort of embarrassed, so nobody put up a fuss. Most of the parents were hanging in the kitchen, dining room, and on the front porch. The littlen's were lollygagging in the front yard with a wiffleball. And Jenn fucking Bunnell was on her knees in the woods, 500 paces from the house, and she was just plain…..gagging. Paul has a strict policy of sucking on an utter, only as long as the milk is free. So when a slut starts making demands (such as asking to maybe meet your friends after swallowing a load of cum) I'm afraid the cow is put back out to pasture. Paul zipped up and helped her stand before he told her she wasn't invited and that she'd have to find her own way home. OH MY GOD! I idolize that cocky bitch! She slapped him good and hard on his baby face right cheek, called him a few choice words, and then huffed off towards the main road (half expecting him to follow and apologize). But then that is exactly why Jenn was merely a bronze medalist in the Paul Olympics. Stamina, but no discipline, ..no heart. And certainly not enough smarts to realize their tango for two was never going to make it past a back seat. So as she followed the road back to town, half crying, Paul had already deleted her from his spank bank and was focused on his new target; my mom's chicken and potato chip casserole.

Embry, Jake and I were in Emily's tiny little sitting area, trying to hook up my xbox to the ancient television that we weren't even sure had all the right plugs. Jake was mostly just brooding in a chair, overly pissy, and unenthusiastic about anything. (The norm these past two weeks.) This party was Kimless as so many events were. Since Collin hadn't joined us yet, I didn't have Mrs. Abrams as a buffer. So Kim was never allowed ANYWHERE with me if Hannah wasn't. Nobody was really in the best of moods seeing as we had so recently fairwelled Harry Clearwater. It wasn't a party, but more a gathering of close friends. My parents, Quil's Grandparents, and Billy Black were all in a pseudo circle in Emily's dining room chatting up Sue and Seth.

Mrs. Uley was wrapped in an afghan and propped up in a rocking chair, sitting in between Leah and Mrs. Ateara. Leah was holding one of her hands and staring off into space. On her other side, Mrs. Ataera was trying to feed her a drink through a straw. A while back, Mrs. Uley had a stroke and was almost a vegetable now. She had to be put in a nursing home because Sam couldn't be there to take care of her all the time. With medical bills and stuff, Sam had to sell their house. Leaving Sam and his fiancé, (who moved to the res to be with him, ouch!), homeless like unwanted puppies. That's when old Quil stepped in and signed over his hunting cabin to Emily. Said no woman should ever be without something to call her own. It was in pretty shabby shape at first, and didn't have a second floor yet or running water in the kitchen. Happily though, after generous donations by our families (and a construction crew made up of the strongest bunch of guys on the res who worked cheap), Emily made it into a home. The three women sat in silence on the porch as Sam brought his mother a piece of chopped up corn from the grill. Leah let her long, flowing hair fall into her face as she stared off into the woods, and then gripped Mrs. Uley's hand tighter.

Ms. Christine(Embry's mom) couldn't make it to our shindig. Surprise, surprise. She always said she could never get anyone to cover her shift at the diner or they were just too busy to ask off. But since Embry turned out all fanged and fuzzy. Well,…..well we knew why she never came around. It was decided that Paul's grandma and older cousin were best left in the dark, but his 7 year old cousin Betsy and her 6 year old brother Nicky were playing out front with the rest of the kids. Emily was in the kitchen, taking yet another pie out of the oven. Her sister was standing next to her, mixing a pitcher of lemonade. Paul finally made his way in, grabbing 2 big rice crispy treats as he passed the table, and clutching what better be the fucking thing he wasn't suppose to forget to pick up.

"So, you got it?" nosey 'lil Embry beat me to the punch.

"Of course I got it, you….." Paul paused for a moment, realizing the current company. "Yea, I got it."

"Sweet."

"Great. Then what are we fu…fooling around with this for? Come on, pop it in." So I was excited? We all were. The res wasn't very self sustaining. Most everything had to be purchased or processed in Forks or the city. But we did have one fried chicken lunch shack. Owned, run, and chef'd by one Mr. Wieblow; An old, ex-fisherman with arthritis and three cats. At said shack you could enjoy a burnt chicken lunch, buy an assortment of used fishing gear or auto accessories, or choose from a small section of the only place to rent movies within Quileute borders. It was mostly just a section of a wall filled with VHS' and DVD's he picked up at garage sales and thrift stores. But there was one singular jewel we kept him in business with. He didn't even have a whole season. Just one DVD of one season. But there wasn't a get together in the last year we didn't celebrate by a group screening of this whipped creamed topped masterpiece. Embry plopped it in, and Paul settled next to me on the couch. Once the menu music came on, Seth stopped mid sentence with Old Quil, and ran over to the floor next to Jake's chair. Emily heard the music too and looked around the corner from the kitchen.

"Owwwhh. Come on guys. Really? Can't we have just one. Special. Day. Without her?" at this point, even Sam had heard the melody and walked in the house to stand behind Jake's chair. He nodded to the parents and then pouted his lip at his lady.

"Sweetie, ………." He batted his eyelashes and quivered his lip. Emily crossed her arms and shook her head back in forth but with a defeated smile.

"Ugh, Fine! But only ONE episode. We have more important things to do today." Gesturing her head towards Seth and walking back into the kitchen.

And now….there would be no more distractions between us on our scrumptious, Vamp-steaking Buffy. Spunky, with a touch of innocent. She was born to anilate all vampires from the Earth and ridiculously hot….for a white girl. How could the pack not drool all over our dog bowls? Picking our favorite, we all got ready for our ass kicking princess of the graveyard, to use a broken piece of bench to dust an entire coven. If only we could find a girl like this for Embry. If only we could find any girl for Embry. The episode played on and there was just a teaspoon full of sorrow in the air. Harry had been the only old guy who watched it religiously with us. He sort of had a thing for Eliza Duschku.

We were so wrapped up in other conversations and questions from the parents that we hadn't realized the one nauseous scene had snuck up on us. We usually are ready for the part when the Buff has a touching moment with her loser vamp boyfriend. Besides everyone else being totally grossed out, Jake was just a touch sensitive about it. We all turned our heads back to the screen at the exact moment to see her caress his cheek and lean in for a kiss. Seth couldn't fumble the fast forward of the controller quick enough, so Embry just leaned in and turned off the T.V. Everyone in the room sat in awkward silence and we looked at Jake. He was looking at the floor with his jaw clenched and had squeezed his empty can of soda into scrap metal. Mr. Ateara's normally terrible timing was forever forgiven for his first saving entrance.
"Hey……everybody? So, Burgers are done." He had brought the tray full of meat and veggies in from the grill and was looking at everyone, confused as to what he'd missed. Mrs. Aterea tried terribly to move the party along in conversation.

"Oh, ….wonderful…lets just uh, lets just get the table situated. Where is that boy?" Pitiful, but everyone else followed suit and started talking and shuffling around. Everyone except Jake. Billy wheeled over to his son, patted Jake's leg, and brought zombie boy out of his angry daydream.

"Oh yea,…I think, ……I think I better get started on my shift." He dismissed all of us without another word and ran out, darting for the tree line. For the first time, we couldn't rag on his dramatic resentment. Two weeks ago, his "almost" girlfriend disappeared for three days and brought back the whole fucking Cullen clan with her. They were back to stay and the stench they soiled the land with was almost as grotesque as the idea that Bella had climbed back on top of that cold corpse cock. Jake had been droning around like a spanked little bitch ever since. We would give him one more week to wallow before starting to audition replacements. Other fish in the Sea, right? And with wolf junk like ours, girls would be throwing themselves on the fucking hook.

Emily and Wendy called the kids in to wash their hands. We would have to finish Miss Buffy later. Me and the guys started lining the card tables together and unfolding all the chairs. We were creating one super-table that took up all of Emily's house. Settling in to our places, Billy rolled to the end, Sue at his left and Old Quil to his right. Uncomfortably, Leah sat next to her mom and Sam sat directly across, after carrying his mom inside, still in her rocking chair. Even though Mrs. Uley now had the brain function of a toddler, she still always preferred to be near Leah, almost like a favorite babysitter. She sat at the middle of the table with no place setting, staring into a corner of the ceiling, and fidgeting on Leah's leg, looking for her hand. With the rest of us shuffling in, the only placement of note was the comical positions Mrs. Ateara and Old Quil had taken at the absolute farthest possible sides of the table. I didn't care, as long as I didn't have to sit next to Johnny. People were starting to calm and take their places when Quil jogged in the door, still in the process of pulling his shirt over his head.

"Hey…..Jake said lunch was ready." Since the return of Doctor Leech's gang, we always had at least one wolf on patrol. During the party, we were taking 1 hour shifts. Since Jake had just started, I would at least get to finish lunch before I had to take my turn. He was out of breath and reaching for a plate when his Grandma Miranda spoke to him.

"Honey, where are your shoes?" Everyone on our end of the table looked at his bare feet as he made a hitch hiker thumb and pointed behind him.

"In the yard, I didn't want Paul to eat my cheeseburger." Paul already had his cheeks stuffed with macaroni like a squirrel, and suddenly looked at him, offended.

" faaawwwuk yoooowwee" He managed to mumble out with one eye shut, chewing in determination.

"Ha, Jesus I was just joki……………………………………………….." But he didn't finish his thought. He had been laughing with us but was now stuck in his current position like a statue. Jaw hanging wide open like big gay guppy, wide eyed and unblinking, holding the ladle of potato salad upside down and letting it splatter onto the table cloth. One by one, we all realized he'd stopped talking and started looking in the direction he was to see whatever spectacle had him stupefied. The silence spread down the table until Sue was the last one jabbering. She realized everyone was looking over her head and spun around too. Johnny had made it to the table already from the upstairs bathroom. Betsy and Aaron were running down the stairs in front of Emily, who was holding her 4 year old niece Violet, on her hip. Her sister held her other niece and they looked only at each other as they finished their conversation down the stairs.

"I know Daddy always said to put sulfur in the ground for blue, but I asked the man at Monroe's and he said I should really try aluminum if I want all the purple out…."

Emily stopped mid sentence like the rest of us today. She looked at Sam with her eyebrows furrowed and then looked at the rest of us trying to make sense. She was alarmed as she followed our gaze behind her to her sister. We all started looking back and forth from Quil to Wendy. Quil to Wendy. Emily gasped and Mrs. Ateara covered her mouth. Wendy, finally meeting our gaze, looked the most confused of all. She was searching each of our faces frantically trying to understand what was going on. The Silence was broken by Mrs. Uley childishly giggling and clapping her hands as if someone had brought a puppy into the room. And as if everything clicked for everyone at once, we all looked back at that stupid dopey fag with understanding. He hadn't moved and was still holding his dripping ladle, upside down in the air.

An older woman! It was sooo Quil. I had to hand it to the guy, he could do worse. But something was wrong. We all started to concern ourselves less with Quil's expression, and more with Wendy's. She wasn't glowing or even happy. She still had a slightly disgusted confused face. She wasn't lingering on Quil's with understanding. She just kept looking at all of us like we all had three eyes. And that's when she felt the weight in her arms shift. Looking down even more confused, the little girl on her hip was desperately reaching out with both hands toward the crowd of people. Well actually not. Just to Quil.

Wendy did a double take and realized it was the baby girl in her arms that held his undivided attention. All the women in the room gasped this time. There was the ringing sound of two utensils dropping to plates and the scooting of a chair as Sam abruptly stood up and looked at the little girl. Seth was the first to speak with an annunciated "Oh. My. God." It was quickly followed by more of Emily gasping and Embry mouthing ". Shit." I had to bring my hands to my head like I was biting my nails. Why? To hide the boner sized smile on my face and to stop myself from giggling. My feet were practically tapping they were so excited. This was going to be. The greatest thing. That ever happened to me.

The entire table had their mouth's open in shock. Well everyone except Sam, who was focusing on Emily, her sister, and her niece. He hadn't once looked at our side of the room. The little girl with two pigtail braids kept struggling to get out of mother's arms. I wish I had popcorn! She finally squealed out "Momma I want! I want!" This was the final grain of sand. Grandma Miranda started blubbering and put her hand over her heart. The gasps and murmurs multiplied. Wendy tried in vain to hold her daughter's head, protectively to her face. With a horrified tear, she whimpered "Oh…..oh, Claire."

For the first time in 3 minutes, Quil moved. Like a light switch had gone on. Like the first morning rays of sun had appeared. Like he'd just figured out the answers to the Universe. Quil dropped the ladle and stood up straighter. He adjusted his shoulders like a weight had just been lifted. He took a deep breath and then smiled.

"……..Claire."

At that exact moment Sam tensed, locked his jaw, looked at Quil, …and growled. And also for the first time in 3 minutes, Quil looked away from Baby Claire and looked straight at Sam. The two guys stared at each other. One in extreme fear, the other in extreme anger. I was a dick length close to jumping up and down and giggling and then squealing like a girl at a Jonas brothers' concert. Somebody was about to die, and I had a front row seat. All the family members started backing away in fear of some wolf action about to explode inside the house. Everyone was ready to watch whatever this shit was, about to detonate. Everyone….except the bain of my existence. Everyone except my cock block since birth. My nagger, my pincher, the one and only person that ruins everything good and funny as shit in this world.

The rest of the house was just awkwardly waiting for Sam to fur out and drag Quil into the yard by his teeth. Everyone…except my mom. She stood her ground neutrally in the middle of the table. This was the breath before the storm. And my mother pulled the Hail Mary. She grabbed for the closest tray she could get her hands on and tried to spare Quil's life.

"So,……Does anybody want a peanut butter ball?"

I popped one more peanut butter ball in my mouth and chuckled at the memory. Mom had just brought out one more batch, and had already packed all the other potlucks into Tupperware containers. The party was in three hours at the Clearwater's. I hadn't showered yet, but there was shit to be done. Pops asked me to put in the new mailbox and I didn't put up a fight about it. He was the only one in the family that didn't use me for hulk-like strength on a daily basis. Old age was sneaking up on the man, so I guess I could lend a hand when asked.

I reached for the last ball in the line I'd eaten off the tray. And per usual, the bitch had perfect timing.

"Jared Kusinut Tinsel! If you have eaten all of my butterballs, I'm going to beat your ass with a wooden spoon just like I did when you were little!" She had curlers in her hair and only one eye eyeline'd and mascara'd. She looked like a swamp monster.

"Cool it lady. There's like a billion more already packed." She was walking to the drawer with the spoon when the kitchen phone rang. Saved by the bell. She kept her angry eyes on me as she said hello into the phone.

"Oh hey, yea I was gunna call you. Do you think you can pick up…..No, I have to…….Well can't you tell them…Danny I don't have time for this…..alright alright I'll do it……Ugh, yea I love you too…And Danny not a minute after…..yea, yea..bye sweetie." I probably could down one more ball before my whipping. "Your father has a problem at work and proves useless to me yet again. So I would like to thank you for volunteering to pick up some stuff at Billy's." I raised both my hands up in a question with my mouth puffed out and full of peanut butter balls. She rolled her eyes. " Billy called while you were on you were on you playbox. His business in Port Angeles is taking longer than he thought, and he won't be able to swing back by his house in time to pick up the stuff he made for tonight."

Still chewing the wad of peanut butter "And Jake can't take it because?"

" Because his carburetor is busted. Besides, Billy said he was probably sleeping after his shift last night. And you've seen him lately. It would be nice to let him sleep." Before she even finished her thoughts I was walking towards the staircase. "He also said he put the song book on the kitchen counter." I was halfway up the staircase at this point.

"Yes, yes…these sound like issues for you." She walked to the bottom of the stairs and folded her arms and lifted one eyebrow with a smirk.

"It's either go to Billy's or pick your brother's up from Karate." I froze on the step I was on and didn't turn around.

"Where are the keys?"

I pulled into Jake's driveway and parked the Nissan. Billy's truck was gone and none of the lights were on inside the house. But sure enough, both platters were sitting in the fridge and the song book sat on the kitchen table. I scooped everything up and placed it all in the passenger seat. I was about to get back in the car when I heard a really loud groan and the sound of metal being kicked coming from the garage. As I walked to the door, I spun the car keys around my finger. When I came around the corner, I saw Jake sitting on a turned over bucket, holding something tiny close to his face and looking particularly frustrated. I realized he was sitting among a sea of wood shavings and small, scattered blocks. Groaning loudly again, and crushing whatever he was holding in his fist to dust, he saw me leaning in the doorway.

"Oh, hey man."

"Cum shot for your thoughts?"

"Ehhh, just frustrated. I think my hands are too big."

"Considering I've seen your shlong, I know that is definitely not the case." He laughed and picked up a chunk of wood and threw it at me. I dodged it and walked over to him. Cleaning off a box of old magazines I sat next to him as he picked up a new little block of wood.

"So are you……." I picked up a similar chunk of tiny wood from the floor. "Making furniture for your dollhouse, are we?" He laughed again and punched my arm.

"Nope, a life-size replica of your penis." Ha, he got me. I laughed too.

"But seriously."

"Ugh, just trying to make a woodcarving that doesn't look like shit. Billy's really good at it ya know? And I've discovered it's not genetic." I dropped the block in my hand and picked up another that had been half widdle'd and thrown. It had legs and a butt sticking out of the still cubed portion.

"Your carving animals…..that are drowning?"

"Heh, no. That one looked too much like Paul." It took me a minute.

"You're making a wolf carving….of yourself?"

"Trying."

"Did some creepy medicine man vision in your dreams tell you to do this? Your dad said you were sleeping." He adjusted for a minute, and then continued chipping away without looking at me."

"Oh, ugh…. yea. I got a call. And umm, I just wanted to get this finished before tonight." His uncomfortable weirdoness got my wheels a-turning.

"……..Your making this for her, aren't you?" He shifted, uncomfortable, but didn't look at me. I shook my head at him.

"Jake……"

"She, she wants to come over tomorrow after finals. And …..and Charlie called a few days ago and said her mom couldn't make it to graduation. So he asked me and my dad to use the tickets as a surprise." He was stumbling fast through his words, like he trying to give me reasons not to yell at him. "My dad was gunna pick her up a bracelet on his way home today. I thought I would…………..well, I just wanted it to be done by tomorrow." I felt bad for what I was about to say, but somebody had to say it.

"Jake……this is beyond pathetic. She …..well,……dude, her feelings are clear." He finally gave up the focused widdeling charade and dropped his shoulders.

"I just,.. I've decided I'm just gunna tell her how I feel. Straight out. I'm gunna look her in the face tomorrow, and I'm gunna tell her how it is. If she….well she won't be able to say I never said it." He brought the Swiss army knife and block back to his face. This talk was making me feel sick to my stomach too. I didn't like the feeling of any of my brothers being in pain. Except maybe Paul on occasion. And definitely Quil.

"You think you love her?" he looked at me offended and then looked back at his wood chunk as he spoke.

"I do love her." Oh, Jake.

"You know it's not really that simple, man. Just because you say it out loud…. Well, girls are fickle. And……" I didn't really know how to not sound like a jerk with this.

"I'd believe it more from someone who didn't have a girlfriend proud to be their soul mate." He was going to get annoyed and not take me seriously if I didn't say it right.

"That's just it, Jake. You didn't imprint on her. She doesn't have that connection at the end of the day. She might ….well if she doesn't pick you, well…how is that gunna make anything better?" I think I was just trying to prevent him from embarrassing himself.

"I just, when I look at her I feel something. Not what you feel when you see Kim, I know. But something deep in my stomach. She's right, Jared. And I just ….I won't be able to call myself a man if I don't do this." There was no talking him out of this obviously, so I switched to sensible and supportive.

"Ok man, I get it. Just be careful. Don't take on any Cullen's without calling me and the guys." I patted him on his back and got up from my box. As I walked towards the door I noticed a few legs of a busted up cherry wood coffee table sitting in a pile of trash.

"You know, this really looks more like you. The color has that girlish glow." He looked up and laughed again.

"Oh, I didn't think about that."

"Sure." I started walking backwards out of the garage and started spinning my keys around my finger again. "Oh and Jake, could you do me a favor and watch out for Kimmy since your gunna be at graduation anyway. I don't think there's anyway I'm gunna be able to get her out of going to that. I'd feel better if one of us was in the room, with the Cullen's, ya know?"

"Yea, sure man. Cya tonight"

"Thanks, cya." I turned around and walked out of the garage. But came back and stuck my head into the door way.

"And about calling yourself a man. Well, no one does that anyway, kid. I wouldn't worry about defending a reputation or anything." He put some aim into chucking the block in his hands right at my head.

"DICK!"

*** read above message yall, or no yummy Jared filling.***