"I can't believe you hadn't realised she was in love with you."
Bruce shook his head, "I can't believe she was. I didn't think she thought we were serious..."
He hugged Jack, "she always acted as if she didn't really care."
"Well she obviously did... Does... It's alright baby."
Bruce stood upright, and shook himself, "I'll be fine, I just hope she doesn't do anything stupid."
"Oh, I'm sure she'll be fine, she's not your problem anymore anyway."
Bruce looked over at Jack, "I'm Batman, if she does anything stupid it'll be my problem. If she does anything that'll hurt herself or anyone else it will be my problem."
Jack chuckled, "she wouldn't do anything like that."
Bruce grunted, "... But still."
Dick shook his head, "what do you mean she wouldn't? She's Catwoman. And she's heart broken. You have no idea what she could do."
"We should keep an eye on her, just in case."
Jack nodded, "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned."
Bruce sighed, "thank god for my tracking devices."
Jack looked at Bruce, a quizzical expression on his face.
"I've hidden cameras in her house."
Jack's mouth fell into a mocking, comical O, "oooh, spying on your girlfriends now are you?"
Bruce smiled at him.
The little jokes and jibes that he used to find infuriating he now found cute.
"She's Catwoman, I needed to keep an eye on her."
Jack smiled widely, "alright, but she won't get home for a while."
Bruce nodded, "yeah but the equipment takes that long to set up."
"... She better not do anything stupid..." Bruce mumbled as he started to walk towards the stairs to the Bat-cave.
Although he knew she would.
He walked down the stairs Jack following, and sat at the computer.
Jack also pulled out a chair and sat next to Bruce.
He positioned his chair rather close to Bruce, so he had enough room to work but was still within touching distance.
Bruce sighed angrily as he typed seemingly random words into the computer.
They sat in silence as Bruce tapped away at the keyboard, and occasionally got up to tug at and fiddle with wires at the back of the computer.
Jack looked over at Bruce.
"It's ok, she can't do anything too bad."
Bruce placed his head in his hands.
"But what if she does, she might end up getting hurt. If she does, it'll be my fault."
"Hey, it's not your fault, stop blaming yourself for everything, if she does something stupid it was her decision to. You can't control her."
"... Oh shut up..." Bruce snapped.
Jack shook his head, "fine then, be like that, everything's your fault and there's no proving otherwise. You can be so hard headed."
Bruce turned and looked at Jack, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap, things just seem to be going so badly lately. Apart from what's happened with you."
Jack smiled, an unspoken acceptance of his apology.
"So, have you got the link to the cameras set up?"
Bruce nodded, pressing enter on the keyboard.
Jack started giggling, as if a school girl, at the video he and Bruce were now watching.
He tittered as they watched Selina enter her bedroom, muttering angrily to herself, and she started undressing herself.
She threw the clothes she was removing across the room, aiming to hit this out of place with them.
"Ooh, look at that Brucey, you're missing a treat giving her up." Jack laughed.
He glanced over to Bruce, who had started to blush slightly as they watched Selina stomp angrily around her room in nothing but a frilly black thong.
"... What is she doing?" Bruce asked.
Jack shrugged, "seems she's looking for something."
Bruce inched closer to the screen, "probably her Catwoman costume."
They watched as she crawled under her bed, and retrieved an old, battered mobile phone.
"What the hell? What's that?" Jack moved his chair forward as well.
Selina turned on the mobile.
She spent a short time jabbing at the buttons of the phone, although soon after the phone emitted a bleeping noise, and turned off.
The angered woman threw the mobile across the room.
She quickly located a piece of paper and a pen, then scribbled something on the paper.
"What's she writing? What's she doing?" Jack questioned.
"I have no idea, a number off of the phone maybe?"
Selina dashed out of the bedroom.
"Where's she going? Do you have another camera for her other rooms?"
Bruce nodded and scampered to the back of the monitor.
He replaced one of the wires with another, "can you see her?"
"Yeah, come and see."
They watched as she walked, still in only her thong, and picked up her corded landline phone.
She started copying numbers from the piece of paper onto the dial pad.
She lifted the phone to her ear, "Hello? Is this Arkham asylum? Hi, I'd like to know is I could arrange a visit? With Miss Harleen Quinzel. Yes that's right. It's her birthday soon, I'm an old friend, I just wanted to see if I could pop in to say hi?"
There was a long pause in the conversation.
Jack looked over at Bruce, they were both astounded at what Selina was doing.
Selina's voice echoed from the computer speakers, "oh that'll be brilliant. Ok I'll be in then. Thank you."
She hung up.
Bruce sighed.
"Ok, I think we can guess what she's going to do."
Jack chuckled, "oh god, if one heart broken woman is scary, two would scare me shitless!"
"What should we do?"
Jack cocked his head, "can't you just phone them up and tell them not to do it?"
"...No. I've tried it before, the new warden hates me and thinks I'm 'hindering the inmates progress.'"
Jack grunted, "sucks, I would have loved for you to have come and visited me more often in Arkham."
Bruce smiled, "I did more for you than you knew."
"Awww, how sweet of you... So what are we going to do about this?"
"Track her, of course, find out what she plans to do with Harley."
Jack smirked, "I would have thought it would be obvious what she plans to do."
Bruce smiled, "yes, but we shouldn't assume."
Jack laughed, running his hand through his hair, "Harley doesn't know anything about us, when she finds out she'll go nuts."
Bruce chuckled, "yeah, good luck handling that mess."
Jack grunted disapprovingly, "anyway, how do we track her? Have you put those tracking thingys on her clothes?"
Bruce smiled, "on all her bras."
Jack smiled back, "oh aren't you a sly one. Did it take you long to do that?"
Bruce chuckled, "surprisingly long."
He sighed dispiritedly.
Jack's smile faded, "oh honey it's ok, you didn't mean to lead her on. You can't help what happened."
"... I wish I hadn't hurt her."
Jack patted Bruce on the shoulder, "the best thing we can do now is make sure she doesn't hurt herself."
"Well I've got trackers on her, I'll keep the monitor on me, we'll know exactly where she is, when she goes anywhere near Arkham we'll know."
"Ok, brilliant So... do we just carry on as normal until she does?"
Bruce nodded, "yeah I guess so. I'll keep this link to the cameras up, but, apart from that? Yeah, we act as normal."
Jack smiled, "good, lots of time to ourselves..."
He giggled.
Bruce smiled at him, "oi, there are children living here, we can't be doing that all the time. Although it would be nice..."
Jack chuckled, "well we could go to a hotel or something, I mean, you're Bruce Wayne, you own most of them."
Bruce chuckled.
"Yeah maybe. Sounds nice..."
Jack stood, hands on hips, smiling of course.
"Well, shall we go up stairs?"
Bruce chuckled, and took to his feet as well.
They slowly climbed the stairs together.
As they did they chatted, menial talk about nothing in particular.
Alfred hurried over to them.
He looked slightly alarmed.
"Uh, master Bruce, Jarred is here, says that he arranged to meet with you, but you didn't show up, says he phoned but you didn't answer."
"My business phone is upstairs. I completely forgot about it."
Bruce shook his head in annoyance.
"I can't believe I forgot, I never forget my appointments."
Jack patted Bruce on the back.
"It's ok, you've been busy."
"I've never forgotten before."
Bruce started to hurry down the hallway to meet Jarred.
Followed by Jack and Alfred.
"Hey, Jarred!" He said in a loud, manly drawl as he walked up to him, arms opened.
"Bruce, mate! 'ow are you?"
Jarred's voice seemed cold, a strong cockney accent, and a lazy mouth.
"Oh yeah I'm fine, I'm fine"
"Yeah, 'm wonderin' why you missed our 'pointment, ya never have before."
Bruce placed him hand on the back of his head, "yeah sorry I've been busy, out with my… urrr…"
Bruce glanced at Jack then looked down at his shoes, "friend."
Jack looked over at Bruce, slightly shocked.
Jarred looked over at Jack, "this 'im? Bit scrawny ain't 'e? Awful tall though!"
Jarred gave a loud short, bark like laugh.
Bruce laughed as well, "yeah, he is."
Jack frowned at him.
He'd just laughed at him.
Jarred walked over to shake Jacks hand, "my name's Jarred, wha's your's? Or should I just call you Bruce's friend?"
Jack didn't move, he stood staring at Bruce.
Who was leaning against the wall, smiling.
Friend?
Had he really done all this to be called nothing more than a friend?
He had changed his life for this man and he wouldn't admit to anything?
Even to this buffoon?
"His name's Jack… umm… Napier, he's a new business partner. He'll be working with me quite a lot from now on." Bruce said to fill the silence.
Business partner?
Jack took a deep breath.
He stood, unblinking.
"'E don't talk much does 'e, you sure 'e's alright?"
Bruce nodded, "yeah he's fine, he's not too good outside the boardroom."
They laughed.
"'E might end up as a bit of a drag if 'e's not social."
Bruce chuckled, looking over at Jack.
"He's good where it matters."
He smiled sheepishly, realising he had done something wrong.
"Jarred could you go and wait in the meeting room, I need to talk to Jack."
Jarred nodded and waddled off.
Bruce watched the short chubby man leave.
"Jack? Are you alright?"
Jack huffed.
"Yeah, I'm fine." He grunted.
"Honey," Bruce half-whispered, "I'm sorry, he's a really 'manly man', if he found out about us then our business relationship would be over."
Jack looked down, "if this is gunna work then we need to be open about it, and he'd find out about it anyway."
Bruce shook his head.
"But not now." Bruce turned and walked towards the meeting room.
Jack didn't follow, he stood, disheartened.
Alfred smiled over at him, "I'm sure he didn't mean any harm master Jack."
Jack blinked several times and sniffed.
"Yeah, probably not."
Jack walked after Bruce.
He stopped before the door and took out his compact mirror and make up out of his pockets.
He applied some more of his foundation onto his face.
As well as some blush and eye shadow, eyeliner, and some lipstick.
He'd show that 'manly man' what was what.
He walked into the small sitting room, the temporary meeting room.
Jarred and Bruce were in deep conversation, talking about girls they had recently gone out with.
"Yeah, the las' girl I was with was this one called Lisa, she was lovely, hard to get, but worth it. You still going out with that wildcard? What's 'er name? Selina?"
Bruce chuckled, "yeah, broke up with her yesterday. She was err… not my type."
Jarred laughed, "she had boobs didn't she?"
Jack sat next to Bruce, a little closer than friends should.
Jarred looked over at Jack, noticing his overuse of make up, he became slightly quieter.
"That can't be the only reason you broke up with her, I mean, she was a hell of a catch, Brucey." Jack smirked.
Jarred raised an eyebrow, he seemed unnerved.
"Well to be honest, she was really clingy, if I even talked to any other women she went nuts."
"…Only other women?" Jack mumbled loudly.
Bruce glared at Jack.
"So anyway, this new account you're opening, what will you actually be working on with the money I give you?"
Jarred sat upright, "well, we'a hopin' to set up a small branch of our business designed to 'elp people oo've not been in work for over 4 months get work experience with our company."
Bruce leant forward smiling.
"So free work for you?"
"Kinda', tha's part of it, we also promise to give anyone who does work experience will us a recommendation."
"That sounds good" chimed Jack, "sounds like something I would have liked when I was young."
"Oh yeah! Speaking of young'uns, 'ow's that kid of your's?"
Bruce's slight smile grew as they started to talk about his child.
"Damien. Yeah he's fine, doing well in school, and in his sports and everything."
Jack crossed his arms, "doesn't like me though…!"
Bruce, forgetting himself for a minute, put his hand on Jack's knee, "he just needs some time to get used to you."
His eyes widened and he jerked his hand away.
Jarred shifted uncomfortably in his chair.
"So, umm, do ya' wanna get this account signed over then? I 'ave to go soon, got other things to do."
"Yeah, sure," Jack said over enthusiastically, "I can't wait to start working with you in the future."
Jarred again, shifted uncomfortably.
He moved to get up from his chair.
"Ya' know what Bruce, can we sign this another day, I've jus' remembered something I've got to do."
Bruce near leaped up from his chair, "now hang on it'll only take a few minutes to sign the deal. I can get the documents now."
"Yeah, give me and Jarred a few seconds to chat alone" smirked Jack.
"No, it's ok Bruce, I really have to go."
Jarred left the room, almost running.
They heard the door close as he left.
"Why did you do that, Jack?"
Jack looked at his shoes, "I don't like people like him."
"What do you mean?"
Jack shrugged, "I used to kill people like him."
"You'd kill anyone. You'd kill your mum for a slice of cheese."
Jack giggled.
"I used to kill anyone, I did so without prejudice."
Jack exhaled.
"… Jack, you can't do this sort of thing. Jarred will most likely close his accounts with Wayne enterprises. We will lose so much money."
Jack huffed.
"So, it's only money."
"It's not only money, it was my parents money, and it's my job to make sure it's kept safe."
"Well I don't think it's 'safe' if it's shared with people like him."
Bruce scowled at Jack, "I decide what to do with it."
Jack had had enough of this pointless argument.
"Fine."
He walked off in a strop, leaving Bruce frowning.
Bruce swore under his breath.
They spent the rest of the day hardly talking.
A few annoyed, sad, and eventually longing looks passed from one to the other.
They eventually forgave each other, but no one wanted to say the first word.
That night Bruce clambered into bed with Jack, after going out to do a brief scour of the city as Batman.
He smiled to himself as a half-asleep Jack rolled over to hug him.
"Hi, honey."
…
As the morning came Bruce woke to find Jack staring at him, smiling.
"Hey smiley. Why are you awake so early?"
Jack shrugged, "I don't sleep much normally anyway."
"I thought you could sleep better with me here."
Jack nodded, "I can, but there's a limit to how long I can sleep."
Bruce smiled, "oh yeah, we're going shopping today, for stuff for you."
"Oooh yay, can I pick out anything I want?"
"As long as it's not too Joker-like."
Bruce swung his legs off the edge of the bed and picked his clothes up off of the floor.
He started to get dressed.
Jack watched for a while, then started to get dressed himself.
…
Alfred watched as the pair walked down the stairs towards him.
"Sir's, I took the liberty of making some pancakes for your breakfast, I thought after yesterday they may be welcome."
"Oooh, yum I love pancakes, Harley used to make them for me after a successful robbery."
Bruce looked over at Jack, he was sure that comment was made on purpose.
They walked to the kitchen and sat down to start eating the food that had been prepared for them.
"We'll check on Selina, then get to shopping."
"Oh I already checked on her, she was lounging about on her sofa, watching T.V."
Bruce nodded "oh, ok."
They sat and chatted whilst eating their breakfast, Jack told, what he though was, a rather amusing story about being forced to drink paint thinner by an abusive guard at Arkham.
"Who was it?" Bruce asked, frowning viciously.
"His name was… Jennis? I think? Yeah. Albert Jennis. It's ok though honey, he got fired when I almost died from it."
Jack shook his head and chuckled.
"How can you act like that Jack? How can you go though such an ordeal and then laugh about it, you almost died!"
Jack smiled and shook his head, "I wasn't going to die."
"What? How can you say that?"
"There have only been two times when I truly felt I was going to die."
He raised his forefinger.
"When I first became Joker. When I fell into the acid? I felt like I was burning and drowning at the same time."
He raised a second finger.
"And one of the times when we first started fighting. When I'd got really badly beaten, I think the nurse said I had broken 72 bones, and I had fallen into that frozen lake, my lungs where half filled with water and blood."
He smiled at Bruce.
"Do you remember that? I kept calling for help, but no one came, then you swung in like that stupid hero you are and saved me."
Bruce giggled, "yeah, I remember, when you saw it was me you started saying to throw you back in the water."
Bruce swallowed his last mouthful of pancake and slammed his hands on the table.
"Right! Let's get going. Those clothes aren't going to buy themselves."
.
.
I'm not going to update this untill I get 10 reviews for this story, that's only 3 more, this isn't me being mean and refusing to update, this is me not knowing if people are enjoying this story, I need to know what you think!