A/N: again, thanks for all the alerts and favourites! Keep em' coming ;)

Puck pulled on a sweater, grabbed his keys off the kitchen table and made for the front door. Calling out a quick "Later!" to his mom and sister, he slammed out the house and jogged across the lawn to his truck. It was half eleven and he was running late.

It was Saturday morning and in keeping with tradition, the guys were going round Finn's for his annual birthday breakfast. When they were younger this had consisted of chocolate milk and waffles and they'd all dressed up in super hero costumes because Matt's dad had once told them that birthday's were the most likely times to develop super powers. Now they were older Finn's mom made them mountains of pancakes and then left them to it to get drunk. They didn't go in for dressing up any more either, apart from Mike, who always wore his superman t-shirt in honour of the occasion. Puck had got really pissed off the first year they'd stopped wearing them as he'd loved his spider man outfit, but Mrs Hudson had given him extra maple syrup and calmed him down (don't judge. He was a guy that liked his syrup).

As he parked on the curb outside Finn's, Puck grinned at the sight of Matt and Mike staggering up the path to the door weighed down by four crates of beer.

"Yo! You need any help?" he called, getting out of the truck and following after them.

"Hey man" said Mike, "can you ring the bell for us?"

"My arms are about to drop off" put in Matt. As well as beer, he was carrying a monster sized bag of cheetos and his football helmet – it was a longstanding joke between them that they had to eat chips out of it at parties. Puck wasn't entirely sure where that tradition had started, but it had to be respected.

He gave the helmet a fond pat before pressing the doorbell. "So you guys coming tonight?" he asked.

Mike nodded. "Yeah, dude. Rach told us about it the other day."

"Rach?" Puck frowned at him, his good mood evaporating. "Since when did you call Berry by her nickname?"

"Since she got hot" Mike grinned, shifting the weight of the beer so he didn't drop it.

"What do you mean, since she got hot?" Puck demanded. She's always been hot, he added silently. Chang would have to be God damn blind not to have noticed it by now.

"Look, I know you don't like her man" Mike grimaced, "and I know you think she's a loser, but she's not that bad. Plus she's got a smokin' body."

Well fuck. You think he didn't know that? Out loud he snorted and turned away.

"Whatever, dude. Just don't come crying to me when she goes all psycho on your ass."

Mike grinned. "Cool. So what time you want us to get there tonight anyway?"

"Seven" he grunted, keeping his eyes on the door. The thought of Mike liking Rachel, asking Rachel out, made him want to punch something. She was fucking Rachel Berry. Guys weren't supposed to like her. She was supposed to be all focused on her music career and shit, not flirting around with idiots like Chang. Plus if they started dating, then she she'd be off limits. Not that he cared about that of course (yeah, who was he kidding).

But despite the amount of time he spent thinking about her – and it wasn't just fantasies about her barely-functional skirts either, recently he'd found himself having dreams about them singing together, and that was so not badass – he hadn't been planning on doing anything about it. Because there was no way in hell she'd be cool with a hook up. And he didn't do relationships.

"Hey dude, what's up?" Matt raised an eyebrow at his Puck's dark expression.

"Nothing. I'm just –"

It was at this moment that Finn pulled open the door, grinning manically.

"What took you so long? I said eleven!" he said, standing back so the other guys could get in. "Woah, beer much?"

"You know what Puck's like" said Mike, staggering over the threshold with his crates. "I bet he was still in bed ten minutes ago."

"You weren't exactly punctual either" Puck grumbled, his mind drawn helplessly to Rachel and her gold stars for attendance. He was so fucking screwed.

"Well my mom's made a stack of pancakes" Finn told them. "Bring everything through to the kitchen."

Puck shook himself out of his thoughts as he took a seat at the table. He didn't need Berry ruining every single god damn minute of his life, especially on his best friend's birthday. As he reached across to get a plate, he punched Finn lightly on the shoulder.

"Happy Birthday, man. Have a good one."

Finn smiled happily. "Thanks dude. I feel old."

"Yeah, I think I can spot a few wrinkles" chimed in Mike, who was pouring copious amounts of chocolate sauce over his pancakes.

"And some grey hairs" said Matt, through a mouthful of cream.

"What?" Finn looked panicked. "Are you being serious?"

The three boys cracked up as Finn jumped to his feet and ran over to check his face in the mirror.

"So what you get for your birthday?" Matt asked him as he returned to the table, patting his hair self consciously.

Finn shrugged. "Don't know yet. I'm getting my presents later."

Puck snorted. "Which is mom talk for "totally forgot to get the little brat anything, I better haul my ass to the mall"".

Finn grabbed a lemon off the table and chucked it at his head. "Shut it Puckerman"

He ducked hastily, thinking that it was kind of sweet that Mrs H actually believed they were going to put fruit on their pancakes when there was chocolate sauce on offer.

"So you want to come over tonight?" he asked Finn casually.

Rachel had decided that the party should be a surprise, so he'd been given the task of getting Finn to his house that night without him suspecting anything. Which shouldn't be too hard seeing as it was Finn. He'd called Mrs H up the evening before to make sure he wasn't doing anything with the family (yeah, he'd left it kind of late to be checking that sort of thing, but what Berry didn't know, didn't hurt). Mrs H had been down with it all so he was green lit apart from actually getting Finn to turn up.

"Me and Mike were thinking a couple rounds of Halo. You know, kind of like a rite of passage or some shit. Every seventeen year old has to have their ass kicked at x-box before they become a man."

Finn nodded. "Sounds good dude. Apart from the kicking ass bit. I'm so going to own you."

"In your dreams Hudson."

With his job done Puck sat back and finished off his pancakes, trying his best not to think about what Rachel might be wearing to the party.

The rest of the morning was spent drinking beer and seeing who could shove the most cheeto's down their pants (yeah it's immature and he's not proud of it, but – what the fuck's he saying? he's totally proud of it). Then they gave Finn the birthday bumps, which consisted of them chasing him round the house until they'd punched him seventeen times – Mike pointed out that this probably wasn't the best present, but seeing as his mom hadn't got him anything Puck felt they'd come out tops.

"I gotta go" he told Finn when he felt he'd sobered up enough to be able to get home without killing anyone. "My mom and Sarah are going to stay with my aunt and they want me to drive them."

It was true that they were going out of town, but they'd actually left that morning. What he needed to do was go home and sort shit out for that night.

"Okay" grinned Finn, who was on to his eighth beer and at the stage where he was finding everything really funny. "What time you getting back? You know, so we don't come round to play x-box and find a completely empty house". He started chuckling, like it would be the most hilarious fucking thing in the world.

Puck rolled his eyes. "About half seven. Don't let him drink anymore" he added to the room at large.

"It's cool, we're all out" said Matt. "See you later."

"Later."

As Puck drove home, he tried to convince himself that the reason he'd wanted to throw a slushy in Mike's face all day wasn't because he hated the idea of him and Rachel being friends, but because of some other much more plausible reason (which he hadn't come up with yet). So what if they got close? It wasn't like his Thing for Berry actually meant anything; he was obviously just in need of a good lay. It had been a week since he'd last hooked up with Santana and having nothing but his hand for company was clearly causing him to have sexy and deluded fantasies.

But that didn't explain why he was still looking forward to just spending time with her, which was probably the most lame ass thing he'd ever thought in his life. Apart from the fact that their arguments and the lectures kind of turned him on, he also enjoyed being around her. Sure, things were never peaceful, but who the hell needed peace anyway?

Which got him right back to what the fuck he actually wanted. Sex, definitely. But his reasoning up till now for not sleeping with her had been that she'd go crazy on him afterwards and probably demand to start dating. Which he was totally against.

So why did the idea of Mike dating her cause his stomach to churn up like he'd just eaten a bad enchilada?

Ten minutes later when he pulled into his drive, he still didn't have an answer.

Rachel sat on her bed, tapping her foot impatiently as Kurt riffled through her wardrobe. He'd arrived unannounced half an hour earlier under the pretence of "just dropping in for a chat", when she was fully aware that the real motivation behind his visit had been so he could pick out an outfit for her to wear that night. Something she was certain she didn't need his help with, as his idea of party clothes usually involved some form of faux fur or leopard print.

For the last thirty minutes she'd been forced to sit there listening to him moan weakly over her own choice (a black top and chequered blue skirt) and then proceed to bulldoze his way through her entire collection of dresses trying to find something he deemed suitably sexy enough for the occasion. So no, she was not having a good afternoon.

"God, Rach. What were you thinking?" Kurt asked, holding up a light grey trouser suit and wiggling it in her face. "It might have been fashionable in, I don't know, the nineteen eighties."

Yes, this was exactly what she needed right now.

"That I would look smart and presentable for school" she replied stiffly, not appreciating the way he was wrinkling his nose in distaste as he threw the offending item on to the "reject" pile. "And I wouldn't have thought about wearing it to the party anyway. I don't see what's wrong with the outfit I'd already chosen."

Kurt turned to her face her and raised an eyebrow. "Sweetie. How do you expect to keep Puck interested if you insist on wearing clothes that do absolutely nothing to emphasise your curves?"

Rachel gaped. "What do you mean, keep Puck interested? He was never interested in the first place! And what makes you think I'd want to keep him interested even if he was? Which he definitely isn't." She was aware that she was babbling and blushed slightly at the knowing smirk that had appeared on Kurt's face.

"The lady doth protest too much" he told her sagely.

"I am not" she said, with as much dignity as she could manage. "I'm protesting exactly the right amount."

Kurt rolled his eyes theatrically. "You are so difficult to deal with."

It wasn't like this was the first time Rachel had been told this, but it was usually due to her trying to take over things during glee. She was sure that aside from when she was attempting to create the perfect performance, she was actually very agreeable to be around.

"What do you mean?" she frowned.

"Some people just refuse to admit their feelings" said Kurt over his shoulder, as he set to work on her shoe collection.

"I don't have feelings for Noah" she told him resolutely, though in the back of her mind she couldn't help but think of the way he'd stuck his head through her car window the other day and completely thrown her with his smirk and his closeness – she remembered the feel of his breath, warm against her cheek – and his lovely, musky smell. Oh God.

"You can deny them all you like Rachel" Kurt sniffed, "but you'd have to be completely cold blooded not to find him attractive. He's a gorgeous specimen of a man, if slightly crude at times, and on top of everything else he evidently likes you too."

"What?" Rachel felt her heart skip a few beats. Was this just one of Kurt's ridiculous attempts to hook people up? Or did he actually have evidence? Had Puck admitted this himself? She bit her tongue to stop herself from asking any of these questions out loud. This was Noah Puckerman she was thinking about. Even if he had expressed a complimentary sentiment about her, it would only be in the hope of getting into her pants. Which was something that she was determinedly telling herself she didn't want.

"Rachel" said Kurt, in a tone that suggested he was about to impart wisdom to somebody incredibly stupid. "He dragged you into registration the other day looking like he'd rather be dragging you into bed. He clearly has feelings for you."

Shocked, she opened her mouth to speak but Kurt held a hand up to stop her.

"And I know you said that the only reason he did that was to embarrass you, but why would he go to such great lengths when he could have just slushied you and be done with it? He wanted to spend time with you."

"Maybe his mode of bullying has just become more sophisticated?"

"You know that's ridiculous. Not only because I doubt Puck can even spell sophisticated let alone think like it."

"That's hardly fair" she said, not entirely sure why she was coming to Puck's defence but seemingly unable to prevent herself. "He's actually very intelligent, but refuses to focus his talent on his education."

"Have you noticed that you do that a lot?" asked Kurt, smugly.

"Do what?"

"Stand up for him whenever other people put him down. You complain about him constantly to me, but if ever somebody else criticises him, woe betide them."

"I – really don't know what you're talking about. I've never –" Rachel stammered.

"Look" said Kurt, cutting across her. "Why don't we put it to the test? I'll give you a make over for the party tonight and, though I say so myself, you'll look so gorgeous that if Puck really does like you, he won't be able to stop himself from showing you just how much. If he does nothing, you'll know for sure that he doesn't. What do you think?"

Rachel instinctively wanted to say no immediately and run screaming from the building – Kurt's plans tended to have that effect on her – but maybe, for the first time in his life, it wasn't such a bad idea. Recently she did seem to have developed a strange fixation with Puck and whether this was due to her own sexual frustration or the fact that he appeared to be acting differently towards her, it was evident that she needed to do something about it. Kurt's make-over plan would, if nothing else, confirm that he had no feelings for her. Because she was quite certain that even if Kurt made her look as gorgeous as he claimed he could, Puck wouldn't look twice at her if Santana or one of the other cheerio's was offering herself up to him.

And maybe proving this to herself would stop him from filling her thoughts.

"Ok" she said out-loud. "Make me over."

ahhhh it's all kicking off! haha

Would love to know what you think!