*I don't own Degrassi.
Thanks to everyone who reviewed, and adding to your favorites, and your story alerts. :D you guys are awesome.
This chapter isn't much of a good one, BUT I kinda had trouble finding what to do.
Guys, if you have idea PLEASE share! Lol
Enjoyyy!
Chapter 4
I went over to Alli's, seeing that I really needed a friend right now.
"Clare, I can't believe this. So he was there?"
"Yeah, and he asked why I had been avoiding him. What a dumb question."
"Clare." She gave me that look. "You know that it's a very good question."
"I know, but I mean, he's engaged, I can't face that he's moved on so quickly."
"Clare it's only been like 5 years or so."
"But he was my first love, and first loves are permanent."
Alli gave me a hug and I started crying.
I know, I know, what a baby.
But it was true, first loves are permanent, he was permanent.
After I came back home, I saw that I had one missed call.
Eli.
I wasn't sure if to call back, or to even think about it.
But Alli was right; he did deserve a right answer.
After all it's been years.
"Hello?" a woman answered, I guess it was Karen. I hesitated to answer back.
"Yeah, is Eli there?"
"Who's this?"
"Clare."
"Claree? As in Clare Edwards? As in CCLARE EDWARDS?"
I chuckled a bit. "Yes, that would be me."
"ELIII! CLARE'S ON THE PHONE!"
Moments later.
"Hello?" and there was the voice.
"Why is Clare Edwards calling you!" I could hear Karen in the background.
"Yeah, she's a big fan." He commented.
"Yeah, I can see. Look, I think we should talk, you know?"
"Yeah, that's what I wanted to do, Clare. But you keep pushing me away." I could hear the pain in his voice.
I sighed. "Were you trying to tell me you were engaged, because really Eli? That's something I could live without knowing."
"Not at first. Clare, I think we should talk in person for his conversation."
"I'll meet you at the Dot in twenty."
I hung up. Got ready and left to meet Eli.
I sat there by the window, waiting for Eli.
I was nervous as I could ever be.
What I had been running away from all this time, was about to meet me here, right now.
The door opened and walked in Eli.
He came over to the table I was sitting at. He pulled out the chair in front of me and sat down.
He looked at me, the way he use to. Like I meant everything. But of course I didn't.
"So. Where do we start?" I asked.
"Clare, I want to know why you wrote the book about us."
I had to think about what I was going to say for a while.
"Because I needed to get it out there."
"Get what out there?"
"I needed to let you know, that you seriously hurt me, without actually talking to you."
He just looked like he'd been shot.
"Clare, you act like you were the only affected by this. I was depressed for years. You decided to go to New York. I felt like you were going to live you're dream, and leave me behind. What was I suppose to do?"
I just stayed quite for a while.
"Well, oblivious you were able to move on." I gave him that look.
"Karen, she and I started dating like 2 years ago."
"And now you're engaged." I love pointed that out.
"I tried to keep in touch with you, but you didn't want anything to do with me. I couldn't stay in the past forever."
My eyes started to tear up.
"Eli, I love you. I never stop. You were everything to me, from the moment I saw you. You're funny, smart, clever, and so caring. If you wanted to really get in touch with me, you should have fought the odds. You should have gone through everything you could to let me know it wasn't over."
Tears were rolling down my cheeks, and my voice was breaking.
"Clare, it still isn't over" He grabbed my hands and held so.
"But it is, because you're engaged."
I pulled back my hands and walked out.
I didn't go home; instead I went to this bar.
I usually didn't drink, but I really needed one.
It was open mic night, and this girl went on stage.
I don't know if it was the strumming of her guitar or the softness of her voice, but it brought me to more tears.
In that moment I decided I was going to stop feeling down, and move on too.
I took out my phone, and dialed.
I hope he'd answer, it's been a while.
"Hey! I'm glad you answered."