It was dawn, and rain was falling slowly from the skies. In the run down flat where the group who had defeated Sephiroth lived, all was quiet. Until Barret started his trombone practice that is.
"Damn it, Barret!" Yuffie screeched. "I thought that went out the window!"
"Yeah, well." Barret laughed. "I went and got it back, awight?!" he continued to bellow out some god-awful tune on it, waking the household. Tifa, now awake, looked over to where Aeris used to shoot up... a tear formed in her eye, which she quickly brushed away.
"I must be strong for Aeris." she thought, as she picked herself up from the floor.
"Hey, getting up so early?" Cloud asked her.
"Yes. How can you stand the racket?" Tifa replied, putting cigarette butts in her ears. Cloud nodded his head and got up as well, opening the flat's window. Everyone in the neighbourhood hated when he did that, for they would hear Barret too, but they couldn't say anything since he DID help save the world.
"What are we going to do today?" Cid asked, fumbling around for his lighter.
"I dunno." Barret said. "We solved Vincent's death, I guess."
"What WERE we gonna do to Vincent's killer anyway?" Yuffie asked.
"I don't know... we didn't do anything." Tifa sighed.
The whole gang sat around, restless. They hadn't done anything, they had lost Aeris and they had nearly run out of drugs. There was only one thing that could be done.
A few minutes later everyone was dancing and singing at the local karaoke bar. Although it was only 10 o'clock in the morning, it was a 24 hour drinking bar, which served a whole alphabet of drugs, keeping the gang busy for a bit. Some bimbo tart approached Yuffie in the corner when she first entered the bar though.
"Why are you using drugs?" she asked. "Didn't you once save the world?"
"What a personal question..." Yuffie replied. "You know, once you've saved the world, there isn't much you can do after that which'll top it."
A few hours later and the gang were out of their heads, having forgot about Aeris' horrific, painful, humiliating death. Cid and Yuffie were having sex in the middle of the dance floor, with him penetrating with every beat of the music, and Cloud fingering Tifa behind the bar. Even Barret was having some sexy fun, with his finger shoved up Cid's arse.
A few more hours passed, and the joys of booze, fags and cheap drugs wore off, and the group were plunged back into their depression. Sinking into a booth at the bar, they wondered about what to do next; they really didn't want to go back to that stingy flat. When they were about to commit group suicide, Aeris sat down in the booth next to them.
The whole gang were gobsmacked. The last time Yuffie and Tifa saw Aeris she had fallen three storeys onto an electrified, barb-wired, concrete floor with cobble-stones, with the end result being her body largely dismembered and burnt. Yet, here she was, prim and proper, sat right next to them!
"A-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-aeris!" Yuffie shrieked, white as a ghost.
"Yes?" Aeris said sweetly, pulling out a massive gun from her vagina. She pointed it right at Tifa and shot her in the head, killing her instantly.
"Oh my God!" Yuffie cried. With instinct, they all jumped Aeris, and managed to push the gun far away on the other side of the dance floor. With trance music pumping away in the background, Aeris pushed Cid, Yuffie, Barret, Red XIII and Cait Sith off of her and stood up, smiling. She then proceeded to approach Yuffie. With super-human strength she picked up the booth's metal table and slammed it hard on the floor, although Yuffie was nimble, and avoided it by an inch.
"What the hell are you doing?!" Barret cried, shooting at Aeris. The bullets entered into her body, but simply came back out again slowly, and fell to the floor.
"What's going on?" Red XIII shouted in despair.
"RUN!!" Cid screamed, and scarpered for the exit. They all did so, with Cait Sith going through the window above the bar, Barret and Cid through the fire exit, Red XIII through the front door and Yuffie heading towards the toilets.
Unbeknownst to the group, Aeris had been replaced by a cyborg using the real Aeris' DNA. the cyborg was called MEGA B.I.T.C.H. (Mega Bio Instinct-Trained Corpse Huntress). The Aeris MEGA B.I.T.C.H. had locked onto Yuffie.
'SCANNED LIFE FORM. INSTIGATING FOLLOW.' its circuits ran. It began to pursue her.
Looking back, Yuffie realised Aeris was chasing her. She set her legs to run even faster as she pushed to doors to the lady's loos open. As she had come here before, she knew there was a window in the last cubicle. She ran over to the cubicle, but slipped on the wet floor!
"Ow!" she screamed in pain, after twisting her ankle. She looked back and saw Aeris coming closer. Ignoring the pain as best as she could, she kicked out at Aeris and landed a direct hit in her stomach, sending her head-first into the sink. Aeris' head smashed into the sink, smashing the ceramic in two. She got up though, and continued her pursuit as Yuffie hobbled over to the cubicle, bashed it open and clambered onto the seat to open the window.
"No!" Yuffie cried as Aeris grabbed her leg. Yuffie, panicking, yanked the flush chain as hard as she could and pulled it off, she then wrapped it quickly around Aeris' neck in an attempt to strangle her. So her circuits would not be constricted, Aeris pulled at her hands' giving Yuffie a chance to kick her away again, and flee through the window; she was free... or so she thought.
Landing into an alleyway from the toilet window, Yuffie looked up and down, and noticed the road leading up to her flat. She ran as best as she could, glancing back every so often. She thought she was not being pursued... until when she reached the road, when Aeris suddenly came UP through the road and gave chase! Yuffie, in a state of extreme panic, ripped open her top at the first car she saw; luckily, it was a bloke driving, so he stopped immediately. She dragged him out of the car and nicked it, driving away to escape, but Aeris was amazingly fast, she was able to keep up with the car! Looking in the rear view mirror, she could see Aeris running after the car, even though she was driving at a steady 70 mph! She even drove past her flat!
BANG! She heard, as Aeris grabbed onto the back bumper. Yuffie shit herself as she steered violently right... she did not see the big tree right in front. "CRASH!!!" was all Yuffie heard... that and the air-bag she hit softly, when she hit the tree. Aeris however, was sent flying from the back of the car into the tree, hitting it very... very hard.
After a few seconds, Yuffie regained herself and exited the car. She looked at Aeris; her face was half ripped off... it was half constructed of metal! But there was definitely bone, too, Yuffie saw. She knew Aeris would recover soon, so with bootless speed she hasted away back home!
A few minutes later, Aeris' fingers started to twitch.
"RESETTING..... REBOOTING PROGRAMME C332. KILL GROUP CONT-RA SHIN-RA."
Her legs then started to move, and then her arms. She heaved herself up from the wreck of the car, just as the police arrived. A policeman stepped out of the policecar and approached the scene.
"Ma'am!" he cried. "Are you all right?"
No reply.
"Ma'am...?"
Aeris turned around and faced him. All that was heard was a scream as she pulled a razor blade out from her vagina and ripped off his head. She then stole his uniform, put it on and nicked his car. She was going to Cont-Ra's flat.
Yuffie slammed the door shut behind her as she ran into the flat. Unfortunately for her, no one else was home yet.
"Where could they be?!" she cried, slumping down onto the floor. The flat was quiet and dark, the only light coming from the streetlamps outside that shone through the glassless window. She picked up half a cigarette that lay on the floor and lit it, stressed out of her brain. She had a psycho robot after her and was sick with worry; what was she gonna do? Tifa was dead... Aeris was dead... and had come back to kill her. Would Tifa come back too? Yuffie hoped not; she couldn't handle two psycho bitches. Just as she was about to take a drag from the old cigarette, she noticed a small red dot at the top, she wasn't the cherry: it was a sniper's AIM! She quickly dove to the left, just in time to avoid being shot right through the throat! The bullet went right through the door that was behind her; they must of been armour piercing bullets, thought Yuffie, much later. Scared out of her wits, Yuffie huddled into the corner. Remembering her ninja training, she blew smoke into the room from the cigarette. Sure enough, she could see the infrared beam... someone was targeting at her through a precision rifle. It must have been Aeris. What could Yuffie do?! She felt trapped; she couldn't go out through the door... the window was also guarded.
Aeris lie in wait...
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"Yo! Anyone here?" Cid called into the bar. After running away from Aeris, he came back a few minutes later to check on the situation. It seemed all was quiet... everyone was gone. He looked around on the dancefloor.
"Strange." he thought to himself. "Tifa's body is gone."
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Thinking about what she could do to get out of this deadly situation, Yuffie sat quietly. Looking at the cigarette held in her hand, an idea popped into her head. With the infrared beam searching frantically for a target, Yuffie knew Aeris would not give up. She got up on her knees and prepared herself to leap; she put her fingers into flicking position, as she had done before... and put the cigarette in the middle of them. After counting to three, she flicked the cigarette into the middle of the room! It worked! Aeris mistook the moving object for Yuffie and shot at it! Whilst reloading Yuffie jumped through the window as fast as she could, with an almighty smash, landing onto the road below.
Ignoring the pain shooting through her body, Yuffie quickly picked herself up and ran down the road, avoiding nimbly the oncoming shots from the precision rifle; she suddenly spotted Cait Sith coming out of a public toilet, so she grabbed and ran away with him from the flat, hand in hand.
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About half an hour later, everyone had regrouped at a strip club called the Phoenix Go Down On Me around thirty minutes from their flat, arranging to meet using their PHSs.
"Tifa's dead... Aeris has been robotised... what is going on?" Red XIII whispered. Cid inhaled deeply on a cigarette and stared deeply into space... Cait Sith sat in the corner, also not speaking.
"I dunno... but whatever is goin' on, we 'avta avoid Aeris." Barret suggested.
"Well, obviously. Otherwise we're DEAD! Not even hitting a tree at 100mph can stop that bitch!" Yuffie cried, running her hands through her hair; Cid placed his arm lovingly around her shoulders in an attempt to calm her down. Red XIII pondered for a moment.
"She's obviously not Aeris, but some clone, robotically enhanced. And robots are sensitive to electricity. So if we encounter her again, we just need something powerful enough to taser her with." he noted.
"You think so?" Cid asked.
"It's all I can think of!"
"It's the best we got..." Barret added. They all ordered a drink and a hooker and relaxed for a bit; the evening had taken it completely out of them... for a while they partied and drank, enjoying the hooker's company. Eventually, they ran out of five pound notes to shove into her panties, so left the strip club and found a hotel to sleep in, although it was pretty run down. ... It was much cleaner than their old flat though. It was called Shitski Nein Hotel.
The room in which they stayed was quite big, and had three large double beds. There was one large window with a tar-stained net curtain and also a few ashtrays dotted here and there. The plush carpet was luxurious Yuffie thought, as she took her shoes off and ran around the room, jumping on the beds. The excitement was infectious, and soon Cid had joined in; he ran around the room with her, and even picked up a pillow and threw it at her. She was too quick for him though, and it missed her by a mile! She rolled backwards and picked it up, throwing it back. HIT! Right in the head! He fell back onto the bed, and pretended to be unconscious. Thinking she had hurt him, she went over to the bed to see if he was all right, and that was when he struck! He quickly grabbed a pillow and hit her hard with it, not realising it was actually the headboard! BAM! Yuffie was knocked unconscious.
"What's going on? Is Aeris back?!" Barret cried, as he entered the room and noticed Yuffie on the floor.
"Uh, no.. we had a little accident." Cid laughed, weakly.
"Weirdo." Red XIII whispered, jumping onto a bed and curling up, ready to go to sleep.
"Oh, Red..." Cait Sith moaned, as he too jumped onto the bed. "Don't go to sleep yet!"
"Why not?"
"I wanna tell ghost stories!!"
"What are you, eight?!"
"Well, technically, around that, yes."
"..."