Chapter 7
Faithfully
She must have been crazy…
Either that or she's truly on her way there…
Otherwise, she would not have let Finn kiss her senseless and then stayed up all night like a giddy high school girl reliving the entire moment…
Yep…
If she was not insane, she would not have spent the whole night tossing and turning, thinking of what ifs and what was and hopes that didn't materialize and wishes that never came true and she blames it all on Finn…
Finn and those meddling Glee club members…
Stifling a yawn and shaking her head to focus on the sheet music in front of her, Rachel thought back longingly to how perfectly fine her life seemingly was up until the time she met Finn again…
For the longest time, she had already made peace with the story that love is a term that was just coined by a besotted fool one drunken night…
She's gotten used to the idea that what you pray for do not always happen and that wishes are only for people like Brittany who believe that Cupid is really the one responsible for bringing two people together….
She's through with pining and longing for things that could never be and of love that could not be duplicated nor returned…
She had spent enough sleepless nights during the time that she left Lima to make up for the hours of anybody who's jetlagged and getting used to the time difference between continents that they have traveled…
She had gone through the highs of a love so passionate that sometimes it feels as if her heart would leap out of her chest and the lows of an excruciating heartbreak that the pain was almost physical…
She's been there… done that… she would not wish to go through it again short of going crazy…
Never… no… definitely not…absolutely…
or so she thought…
Being in this situation right now, she's never been more confused…
There's a part of her that would just want to forgive and start all over again but there's also a part of her that shudders at the thought of the pain that another heartbreak can bring…
In her head, she knows that her love for Finn had never waned but where would she begin to trust when this is exactly just like history repeating itself?
How can she believe him when doing so in the past had left her disappointed, broken and dejected?
How can so many things be the same and yet so different?
How come she's here again thinking of the possibilities when this is somehow the same thing that happened to them not just once or twice but three times in the past?
She promised herself that she will be wiser this time around …
But the thing is, the more she sees Finn, the harder it gets to hold on to that promise…
Darn Kurt…
Darn Mercedes…
Darn last night and Darn Finn for making her feel and think and recall old feelings that she wish she'd never again remember…
Giving up all pretense of reading ANYTHING and covering her face with her song piece instead, Rachel slouched against her seat as she immersed herself in the temporary quiet of the ballroom that they would shoot in…
A quiet that unfortunately was only fleeting because she saw the object of her frustration arrive and so she had no choice but to act as if nothing was amiss as she pasted on a fake, bright smile mostly for his sake…
There was a moment of pause however, wherein Finn just stood in front of her and Rachel almost stopped breathing…
Her heart already racing at the thought that he might bring up the kiss from yesterday or what had happened but thankfully, he only waved hello, plopped down on the seat beside her and put on his aviator sunglasses…
Breathing a sigh of relief, Rachel looked at him quizzically as he gave out a groan as if he was dying…
Finn lifted his head for a moment to look at her direction, he mumbled the words "Puck" and "hangover" and as Rachel nodded in understanding, he once again leaned backwards in his seat and before long he was back to sleeping…
Great… just great!
Rachel thought… He can sleep like a baby and sit beside her without a care in the world while here she was overanalyzing things and jangling like a mass of nerves just being around his presence…
Turning her head to look at his sleeping form, Rachel's look of annoyance quickly dissipated as she started to look at him in earnest unabashedly…
How can he be so heartbreakingly good looking?
He has those cute freckles that are smattered all around his face which in the past she had painstakingly counted (23!)
Those long eyelashes that brush against her face whenever he nuzzles her cheek or when he rests his chin on her shoulders…
His soft hair which she had run her fingers through when they kiss or when he's on her lap and he's sleeping while she's reading …
Just looking at him is enough to make her truly happy and she wonders if he know…
Against her will, Rachel felt her hand trace his cheek lovingly… a sad smile on her face as she remembered the feel of his skin against hers and how she had done the same when he was down in that nurse's clinic with mono…
"Rach- What are you doing?"
He whispered curiously…
Making Rachel jump back in her seat as he removed his sunglasses to fix a quizzical look upon her face…
She jumped in her seat and stood up… A panicked expression on her face as she quickly made up an excuse to save face…
"You- You were having rapid eye movement and I thought that you were having a nightmare so I took it upon myself to wake you up Finny!"
Finny!
Where the hell did that come from?
Finn looked on at her with tender amusement… His eyes twinkling and his shoulders shaking with laughter…
God! How he missed her out of this world craziness…
This is more of the Rachel that he fell in love with…this woman who can make him confused with her strange way of constructing sentences…
This is HIS Rachel and not the bitter, jaded, cynical woman that he seemed to have returned to after all these years…
Rachel looked at him with a pout… a hurt expression on her face as she thought that she's laughing at her rather than what she said…
"Come here, A-rach!"
He pulled her to him and before he knew it he was hugging her and kissing the top of her head…
For a moment he seemed to have forgotten what type of situation they are in before his eyes widened in surprise which was an exact mirror to hers and he quickly released her as they stood face to face in awkward silence…
He wish he had time to savor and relish the moment
That moment of closeness like nothing had happened…
Like everything was the way it was before she left, before they were separated…
It had taken several shout of "Finns" from the director before Finn can pry his gaze away from hers and before he can walk away to rehearse his scene…
The moment he left, Rachel felt her knees buckle… She touched her hand against her rapidly beating chest as she fanned herself before touching her hand again against her burning cheeks…
She heard the director tell him to warm up prior to their musical scene… She saw Finn move towards the piano that was in the corner… She knew that the room was bustling with activity and that he had already moved away and yet she felt the connection they shared linger in the air as if there was no one else and there was only him and there was only her…
And at that moment it was as if the years apart didn't happen…
Like Quinn didn't happen…
Just the fact that she felt his heart in that embrace and as the room was filled with that familiar tune and as his voice rose above the room, she knew she was a goner…
Highway run into the midnight sun
Wheels go round and round
You're on my mind
Break a Leg…
I Love You…
They were separated by an entire ballroom and yet their eyes were glued to each other…
She remembered the time when he first said those three words and how it was so unexpected and yet she was not surprised at all when he said it…
Like she knew it all along and she was just waiting for him to realize it…
Restless hearts, sleep alone tonight
Sending all my love along the wire
I want to be the only person that makes you happy…
The moment that Finn finished his verse, Rachel needed no prodding to sing the second one…
She was lost in the memory of how he made her feel loved and protected and maybe that's why she always felt that he was too good for her and that she'd never be his equal…
He was the only weakness that she had…
The only love of her life…
THE ONLY EXCEPTION to her rules…
They say that the road
Ain't no place to start a family
Right down the line it's been you and me
And lovin' a music man ain't always what it's supposed to be
Oh boy, you stand by me
I'm forever yours
Faithfully
I'd never break up with you…
Around them the crew were stopping what they're doing and staring…
There was something so heartwrenching about the way they sang the song like they meant every single line and lyric…
Just like how they were so sure and confident at that time that they'd never part and that they'd never break up because that's how much they felt for each other…
That's how much they LOVED each other…
Faithfully
I'm still yours…
I'm still yours…
I'm still yours…
Are we a part of something special you and I?
Never taking his gaze off from hers and as they sang the bridge of the song, Finn stood up and walked towards where she was…
She knew just like her, he was also swimming in the memories of a past that they have tried to forget but still have not forgotten…
A painful experience that they are trying to move away from but the scars are too deep that it would take more than that before they can start over…
Because they were a part of something special…
IT WAS SOMETHING SPECIAL…
Something that's rare and genuine and that comes only once in a lifetime that when they lost that chance it was as if they lost the most important part of their lives…
And as the song finished, they were both breathing heavily…
Like they just ran a race as they both stared at each other longingly…
And when he pulled her again in an embrace, she didn't resist this time…
Instead, she put her arms around his waist as she buried her face against his chest and told herself that for now, she wouldn't think…
She had plenty of time for that tomorrow…
Tomorrow…
"What do we do now Rach?"
He whispered softly to her…
At a loss as to what this means and where they're heading after…
She lifted her eyes up to his, the same look of confusion mirrored in her eyes as she tentatively spoke as if she was just learning to speak…
"I don't know - perhaps - perhaps we can start with getting to know each other again and being friends…"
And he's okay with that…
He thought he wouldn't be but it's okay -
Because even if she'd only given him that- just having her here now… at this moment in his embrace… He feels as if he's already won half the fight…
AUTHORS NOTE:
Thank you, thank you, thank you for all your wonderful comments... It inspires me to come up with new chapters so i hope you'd continue expressing your thoughts about this FF because it makes all the hard work i put into it worth it...
And to those who read this fic but don't comment I hope you'd leave a note because hearing from you truly makes me happy…
Also, i'd want to give a heads up that the next chapters might not be posted as fast as i did these ones because i'm going back to work and would be busy already...
I'd try to post new ones within a weeks time though or earlier if my schedule permits...
Lastly, i'd like to invite you guys to check out my other Fanfiction, Fix You if you liked my writing style and this story...
(you may click on my pen name for the link)
It has a PuckleBerry ending though but A LOT of FinChel scenes too for all FinChel shippers... Perhaps the storyline might also engage you despite the fact that it features more of Puck and Rachel...
I hope you can check it out and tell me also what you think!