Chapter 10
Die.
"What's with funerals? I mean it's not like people even care most of the time," Sirius mumbled as he finished reading yet another letter from his mom, stating that some relative had died.
"Well, people normally want to honor the dead person," Remus began.
"Yeah well, my whole family are death eaters. They don't actually deserve honor,"
"Who doesn't deserve honor?" James asked as he walked into the dorm, sweat dripping off him due to the laps he had just ran around the Quidditch pitch.
"In general? My family. Specifically? My uncle. I think he worked for Voldemort. And I need to go to his bloody funeral," Sirius looked like he wanted to punch something. James and Remus scooted towards the wall away from Sirius, each of them being rather fond of their front teeth.
"You could always not go," James mentioned.
"I kinda have to…"
"Since when have you cared about what your family expects you to do?" Sirius glared at James, fully prepared to hit his best friend.
"My mum threatened to cut my balls off the next time she saw me if I didn't come,"
"Die then,"
"…Are you freaking serious?"
"He doesn't mean actually die," Remus decided to intervene before either one of the boys started attempting to kill the other.
"Exactly. Just pretend to die. That should give your mum a heart attack,"
"Besides, no one likes a spotlight stealer,"
"What's a spotlight?" James and Sirius asked unanimously.
"It's a… Oh never mind," Remus began to explain, but saw in his mind it would only result in James and Sirius causing even more chaos than they already do.
"What could I… OH LIGHTBULB!" Sirius jumped off the bed, and ran out the room to begin plotting by himself. Normally this was something he would do with the other Marauders, but this time he needed to do it himself.
"So how'd it go?"
"What happened?"
"Did your mum really threaten to cut your balls off?" A bombard of questions hit Sirius as he walked into the common room, having just gotten back from the funeral.
"Bloody awesome, I think my mom almost DID have a heart attack, and yes she did," Sirius answered in one breath as he dropped his bag onto the ground and slumped into the couch, making Remus's homework fall to the ground.
"What exactly did you do?" Peter asked.
"I got there right as the funeral started and about 5 minutes in, I collapsed on the floor pretending to be dead," Sirius mentioned as if he was simply talking about what he had for lunch.
"Brilliant mate. What did everyone else do?"
"They all ran around screaming. I think someone tried to dump me into the grave too. Then I twitched,"
"…But you were supposed to be dead,"
"Well, sometimes dead people twitch,"
"He's right," Remus confirmed, although he was quite surprised Sirius actually knew that.
"After that everyone ran away. And I was FREEEEEEEEEEEEE" Sirius jumped off the couch, and spread his arms, as if to fly. All he actually succeeded in doing was falling face first onto the floor.
"Dumbass,"
"I HEARD THAT," Sirius lunged towards James, tackling him onto the floor.
"Do you think we should do something?" Peter asked, thinking that Remus and he were going to have to go to another funeral.
"Nah, we don't have our O. for another two years," Remus said as he set his homework aside. "Besides, this should be interesting…"
Please don't kill me *hides behind her desk*. As you can obviously tell, I finally put up a new chapter :D Since my finals are done soon, I'll try to update more regularly, but since my summer is looking pretty busy, I'm not sure what I'll be able to do.
Thanks to my amazingly awesome beta chadders, go check out her story The Diary of a Misunderstood Potter. It's awesome. Also, I've just really gotten into photography lately, and so I've started putting pictures up on flickr (http:/ www. /photos/ abbyyyk ,without the spaces)so if you could check those out and comment about what you think and everything that would be amazing (:
Like always please don't forget to review and stuff. I know I haven't been very consistent in updating, but review motivates me to update ;v