Blackness. The first thing I notice is the blackness. It washes over me, flowing and swirling. I don't mind it. It feels like I am in a washing machine. No colour, no real sensation, it is just dark and flowing and comforting.
The second thing I notice is the damp. It seeps in through my back, warm yet cold, and very unpleasant. I am lying on something, something hard. I try to think about it, but it hurts and makes me feel sick.
My brain slowly begins to wake up again. Where being I? Bits of my memory drift by in no particular order. I struggle to grasp them.
Cinema. We were at the cinema. Waiting outside. To get tickets. It was raining. We were laughing. There was a loud bang. Something hit me. Something hit me hard.
The blackness lurches sickeningly away and begins to recede. Colours swim nauseatingly before my eyes. Shapes, spinning, dancing.
I open my eyes.
I am lying on the pavement. It is cold and damp and red. Red?
It takes me a moment to realise I am lying in blood.
The bang. An explosion. The bin exploded. You were next to me. Are you ok? Are you alive? I try to move my legs, to sit up, but my legs won't move. I can't feel them. I try my arms. They're fine. I grip the floor and slowly, shakily hoist myself to a sitting position. The world slides to one side as my eyes struggle to focus. I can hear screaming.
I realise immediately why my legs won't work.
They're not there.
They're gone, just below the knee. It looks like something out a horror movie. I stare in fascinated horror. A clean cut, straight through. My blood gushes out and marbles the pavement.
I turned my head. You're slumped on the side of the road. You don't look hurt. At least, none of you is missing. I need to get to you, to help you. You need me.
I watch as you groan and sit up slowly. I reach for you, call your name, my arm gives out, I fall to the floor.
"Oh my God!" Your voice, so sweet. You're next to me now. Everything is fine.
"Oh my God! Nina, stay with me, stay with me!" I can hear the panic in your voice. I have to tell you I'm ok, now you're here I'm ok.
"I'm...fine..." the words are hesitant, as though they do not want to come into this horror.
"Nina, your legs. Oh God, your legs." Your voice is a hoarse whisper. You have tears running down your cheeks. Your covered in blood, my blood. You're beautiful. My crimson rose.
You tear off your shirt, tear it in two and wrap it around the bloodied stumps of my legs. Your tears fall onto them. We know. We know already.
I'm fading. I can feel a deep, numbing, wonderful cold seeping up my legs. I want this last moment to be ours, I want you to keep it, along with my heart.
You leave my legs, you can do no more for me. You stare at my bloodied face and I smile at you. With my last strength, I lift my arm and grab your shoulder, pull you down to me. These words are for you L. For you. My last gift. The coldness spreads.
I smile weakly at you. You're crying, dirty, and so, so beautiful. An angel.
"Be...L... be...amazing." My dying whisper, my final wish. For you to be happy.
"Oh Nina..." you put your tear-stained face to mine and kiss me, gently, tenderly. The coldness reaches its final destination, my heart. Take it L. It's yours to keep.
You hold me, the boy with the broken eyes holding the broken girl.
And with that final kiss, like water through your fingers, I slip away.