Hello! I know it's been AGES since I wrote, but...the pressures of your Freshman year really catch up to ya!

"Dad?" Bella said, leaning into the wooden chair.

Charlie was flopped on the kitchen table, sleeping off a hangover. After all, there was only beer and water in the whole house.

He grumbled sleepily.

"I want you to meet Edward."

"Oh, that prissy boy from down the street?"

"Edward...isn't prissy." Bella stammered, annoyed but not showing it at all.

"He's...kind of important."

Edward walked into the house, loudly burped, and threw his coat on the floor.

"Swan dog!" He screeched, slapping Charlie on the back. "I'm Edward, Bella's love toy."

Charlie's eyes grew wide with a horrified expression.

"Oh, no! Nothing's...happened yet!" Bella stammered, waving her hands for emphasis.

"Or so you think."

"EDWARD!" Bella shrieked loudly, pounding on his back with her fists.

"Anyways, I was just gonna take Bella to play baseball with my family."

Charlie was frozen like a statue. He trembled a little, then fell from his chair onto the floor.

"Have fun, dear." He said, words slurred.

"Isn't it going to thunderstorm?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, but we need it." Edward rudely slapped a cap on Bella's hair, then freaked because he had messed it up.

"The way hair is placed is beauty, darling." He said, dusting his hands as though it were a huge job.

Bella rolled her eyes and climbed into the passenger side of the car, interested in what she was about to witness.

"My beautiful hair!" Carsisle announced, twirling locks of his hair around the baseball bat.

"Stop it, dear." Esme, who was catching behind him, groaned. "Alice has to pitch the ball!"

Alice sighed, wound the ball up, and threw a solid pitch. Carisle swung quickly and began to scream.

"My...my...A STRAND OF MY HAIR WAS ON THAT BAT!" He then fell into the dirt and began to crawl.

"Okay, now I see why you need the thunder..." Bella observed.

The ball was still flying through the air. Emmett, wearing his hair uniform, smacked into Edward as he caught the ball.

"Beat that!" He said.

"Why would I want to?" Edward said, brushing the dirt off himself.

Rosalie was next at bat. She swung a solid hit and began running, but Edward was too fast.

He flew through the trees, applying lip gloss as he did it, and caught the ball smoothly in one hand. He then threw it back across the woods. Rosalie skid to a stop on a base.

"You're out." Bella said.

"Dang it!" Rosalie shrieked, pulling a salad bowl from her pocket and smashing it in Bella's face.

"Why did you do that?" Bella panicked, hands over her eyes.

"No one can resist a good salad bowl smashing." She smirked, tossing her hair and taking long strides across the field.

Esme seized the bat and tossed her bob cut into the wind.

Alice pitched, a hint of worry in her eyes. The ball flew up into a tree. Emmett charged after it, flipped up the tree perfectly, then landed with a thump.

"My monkey man." Rosalie smiled.

"BANANA!" Emmet screamed, shaking his head like a monkey.

"NOT LITERALLY, DEAR!" Rosalie called, slightly embarrassed.

"STOP!" Alice screamed, her eyes wide.

"They are coming!"

Hope everybody had a Merry Christmas! Read and review!