ME: Here is chapter 3 where we finally meet our heroine, Kairi and her friends as they live the somewhat routine life as thieves. Happy (late) April Fools to everyone. I'm on a roll I decided to go ahead and work on this chapter since its one of my favorite songs in the movie, next A Friend Like Me, and the long forgotten Proud of Your Boy. Like before, "Let's get it started"- Black Eye Peas reference
XXXX= Scene change
One Jump Ahead
Back in the capital city of Andalasia, on one of its houses many rooftops a voice screamed 'thief' as fourteen-year-old girl with red hair and violet-blue eyes wearing a white top with a black one underneath, a purple skirt with a blue belt, and white slip-on shoes with purple caps, a black choker, a yellow wristband as well as a purple arm band on her left arm and a pair of bracelets on her right arm had almost dropped some bread she was carrying while running away.
"GET BACK HERE!" Alpha Girl Latifah, leader of the Andalasian Second Squad screamed, "When I get through with you your thieving hands will be mounted on my wall!" She roared as her squad climbed up the wall to assist her.
Kairi looked bewildered, "All this for some bread?" She looked at the screen and said, "It a living." The Second Squad run towards her but Kairi jumped off the roof, falling downward. The redhead landed on two ropes that have clothes hanging on them. She fell down collecting clothes in the progress. However before Kairi could get to the end of the line, an old white haired woman named Muriel scream in alarm as she closed the shutters of her window.
Kairi crashed into the shutters causing herself to fall once more. Luck was on her side though; Her fall was broken by a bunch of awnings and the clothes that fell around her. Kairi got up and got the clothes up and smiled while looking at her bread in triumph.
"There she is!" yelled Kowloon from the rooftop. Kairi looked up and ran off somewhere, time for her to find a place to hide
"She won't get away easily this time!" snapped Archer Lee furiously.
"You think that was easy?" Kairi asked with a scowl. The girl saw some talking animals laughing at her. Embarrassed she giggled sheepishly.
As if on cue Kairi turned and saw Latifah, who gotten off the rooftops with her team quick enough somehow, at the end of the alley giving out instructions while yelling at the Lee brothers, "You two, that way! The rest of you, come with me! We'll get that street mouse!"
Kairi quickly placed a blanket over herself and walked over to the Barnyard gang she spoke casually, "Hey guys or animals. Some morin' huh?"
"Getting into trouble earlier today, Kairi?" Otis the cow asked with a smirk.
"Me, in trouble? My big brother Reno always told me 'You are only in trouble if you get caught.' And if I knew where his gun went. Which is weird to ask because I was a six-year-old, how was a six-year-old supposed to know where a-" She was quickly interrupted by Latifah who had finally caught up with the thief.
"Now I got you!" the enraged woman yelled.
"I'm in trouble!" Kairi exclaimed.
"And this time..." before she could say anything else, the Second Squad leader was pushed aside with ease to a cabbage both where the merchant yelled, "My cabbages!" The being responsible was none other than a small pink dog/rabbit/koala look-alike alien experiment named 624 (nicknamed Angel).
The redhead inwardly sighed in relief, "Perfect timing as usual, Angel."
"Ahua Shalom Bye (1) Kai-Kai." (Translation Good Morning Kairi) The pink experiment bowed at her apparent success. The duo was about to make their exit when they soon run into Golden Eye Husky, king of the Ligers who roared and prepared to attack. Instead Kairi barrel rolled (2) out of that then began to sing.
Kairi: Gotta keep
One jump ahead of the breadline,
One swing ahead of the sword,
Angel blew a raspberry at Archer Lee angering him and caused him to be distracted long enough for Kairi pull his pants down revealing his underwear. The guard slashes at the tow but only proceeded in destroying a fish barrel causing fish to come out.
Kairi: I steal only what I can't afford.
(Which is everything!)
The girls laugh as they ran from the archer. He angrily pulls his pants up and gave chase. Instead of pants though, it is actually a fish he put around himself by mistake.
Kairi: One jump ahead of the lawmen
That's all, and that's no joke
Right at 'Joke' a sword was thrown at her face but rammed onto a wall instead.
Kairi: These guys don't appreciate that I'm broke
The girls soon run up a stack of barrels with Angel pushing one right onto Second Squad, knocking them all down. The duo continued their run as various voices yelled to their annoyance as Kairi ran through a house in a temp to ditch the guards.
Crowd: Outta my house! Street mouse! Scoundrel! She stole my blouse!
The angry guards threw a bunch of junk at the thieves, luckily Kairi and Angel move out of the way in time before getting onto the top of the platform.
Kairi: Just a little snack, guys
The redhead tried to play on the squad's sympatric side, it did not work and
Kairi yelped as she dodged swords that Latifah's men threw at her. Soon the angry guards shake the platform like mad in hopes to toss the two right off.
The Guards: Rip her open, take it back, guys!
The redhead fell off the platform as if giving up and falling. But Angel was nearby hanging on a pole, grabbing her human companion causing them to roll in the air and land in the window of a fancy looking school.
Kairi: I can take a hint, must face the facts
You're my only friend, Angel!
Upon their arrival, the Ouran High School Host Club member asked, "Well?" before starting to sing as well.
Host Club Members: Oh it's a shame that Kairi's hit the bottom
She's become a one-girl rise in crime!
Angel saw some coconut cake and with a greedily grabbed some slices into his mouth like a chipmunk. Tamaki Suou swirled Kairi causing the girl to smack right into the annoyed Host Club's 'manager' Renge Houshakuj.
Renge Houshakuj: I'd blame parents except she hasn't got 'em
Renge swung a broom at Kairi only to miss. The girl sings to the boys (and one girl cross-dressing) and goes to sit near Angel.
Kairi: Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat
Tell you all about it when I got the time!
Rolling his eyes, Hikaru Hitachiin pushed the two out of the room via the window causing them to make their quick exit.
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Kairi: One jump ahead of the slowpokes
One skip ahead of my doom,
A strongwoman named Princess Xena flexing to the crowd as Second Squad ran by. The girls were hiding behind she-warrior matching her moves while trying to hide. They made a mistake flexing a different direction and got discovered in the progress.
Kairi: Next time gonna use a nom de plume
"There they go!" Alpha Girl Latifah yelled as she halted her men while pointing to the fleeing girls.
Kairi: One jump ahead of the hit men
One hit ahead of the flock
I think I'll take a stroll around the block
Kairi and Angel rush through a bunch of sheep during the chase as Second Squad throw the little guys aside trying to catch up to the thieves. Now the two quickly jump over Goofy sitting on a bed of nails. The Squad jumped over as well but Golden Eye Husky accidentally landed on the Goofy causing to scream.
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Angel sees some jewelry and tries wearing them. An angry shopkeeper named Squidward Tentacles saw her rushed over.
Squidward Stop, thief! Vandal! (He caught Angel)
"Angel," Kairi exclaimed in annoyance as she grabbed Angel and ran off, scattering the necklace while doing so. A black dragon named Maleficent screamed, "Scandal
Angel and Kairi get cornered at a door by the angry guards with worried looks on their faces.
Kairi: Let's not be too hasty
Suddenly the door opened as a bag of bugs named Oggie Boggie came out.
Oggie Boggie: Still I think she's rather tasty~
Disgusted, Kairi got herself out of his embrace and placed her arms around Latifah and Kowloon making it look like they were the best of friends.
Kairi: Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat
Otherwise we'd get along
The Guards: Wrong!
Second Squad pounced onto Kairi causing a big dust cloud. When the dust clear up, the animal guards and humans got tangled up and the thieves are nowhere in sight.
Until Latifah saw two pottery pots walking away and pointed yelling, "Get them!"
Kairi and Angel ditched their disguises as they run off. They then used a pole to get over a pile of coals. A Pyronite named Ben was already on the coals while the Lees, Kowloon run across it but screamed like mad due to coals being really hot.
Now the thieves run by a swordsman doing swords tricks by sticking one down his throat. Angel came back and stole the said sword causing the man to yelp in alarm. The experiment jumped in front of the Second Squad slashing at them like a mad.
"She got a weapon!" Hurricane Lee screamed in terror as he and the others backed away in fear.
"You idiots," Latifah snapped angrily as she got her spiked club out. "We all got weapons!"
"Yeah," The squad exclaimed coming to their senses while getting their own weapons out. Angel looked sheepishly as she put her sword down and ran after her Kairi.
The girl thieves run off and pass Hermione Granger was practicing a magic rope trick. Kairi yelped as they saw guards catching up. They turn and saw First Squad about to come after them too. At the last minute though, Kairi climbed up the rope very fast causing the guards to collide into each other and Hermione, knocking everyone down in the progress.
The girls keep running as the song comes to an end.
Kairi: One jump ahead of the guards!
Guards: Vandal!
Kairi: One hop ahead of the hump.
Guards: Street mouse!
Kairi: One trick ahead of disaster
Guards: Scoundrel!
Kairi: They're quick, but I'm much faster
Guards: She's in that house!
The song is almost over as the duo is cornered (once again) in a room near a staircase. The redhead however thought of an idea and grabbed a rug as she and Angel go to an open window nearby.
Kairi: Here goes, better throw my hand in
Wish me happy landin'
'Cause all I gotta do is jump~!
Kairi and Angel jumped out the window with the rug in hand. Both squads jump after them but they miss causing the guards to scream in alarm. Soon they landed...right onto a wagon full of manure being sold by Patrick Star.
"If our squad got to her first, this wouldn't have happened", First Squad member Mighty Ray said mocking the squad's whose number (1 Vs. 2) was below theirs. "Oh shut up!" The Second Squad's leader groaned.
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Mean while our familiar heroines used the rug as a parachute as they floated down into the safety of an alley. Angel triumphantly pumped her fist, "Ih! (Yes) Weega (we) did it Kai-Kai."
Kairi laughed happily at her friend's exclamation, "Your sure right about that one Angel." In truth Kairi was just happy to see her friend okay and hoped that neither squads had gotten hurt. She might have been a thief but Kairi and her friends know that for a fact that she is no killer.
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Me: There it is chapter 3 done! (Insert Final Fantasy Fan-Fare (say that six times fast) for working so hard)
Kairi: You're on a roll Q-A.
Me: thanks.
(1)- Any Lilo & Stitch fan should know that was the alien language, Tantalog, I swear I did not make it up; it's the same language Stitch sometimes uses. Maybe I'm foreshadowing future characters coming up in the story ;)
(2)- I couldn't resist adding that there in the story, after all there are KH characters in this fic so I have to add references from game series in it.
Me: Like before R&R please I hope to get at least 10 reviews at this weekends end.