Disclaimer: The usual, plus "I can't make you love me" lyrics are by Bonnie Raitt
A/N: I know, I miss my daily updates too but between work, social life, fanfiction being spoiled and life happening I just can't update so much. I would gladly just write for a living but until I start getting real money for my work I am afraid we'll have to live with updates every 2-3 days, even I have to sleep now and then. Lol.
A Lesson on Love
By Auraluna7
Chapter 16: Kasumi's song
The Tenki twins stood under the shadow of a blossoming cherry tree, the day at the Pleasure Forest a smashing success so far. "Just go with it ok?" Hail rolled her eyes at Rain, she wasn't too happy.
"Why can't I just have Michiru? It will make the plan work either way; plan which by the way I believe is terribly stupid."
Rain looked at her twin sister irritated, she was determined to give Kasumi time alone with Haruka and this was the only plan she could come up with in such short notice."Because that will only make Haruka and you start a fight again, just like you have been doing all day, do you have to be so nasty with your comments? Since when did you think pianists are failed string players huh? You are just pushing Haruka's buttons."
"Fine, I admit it, I am. But it is too funny to see her fume without saying anything, she's a teacher and has to be patient with me, it is quite hilarious."
"Stop it ah? This isn't the Hail's Show."
"But it always is!" Rain looked a bit exasperated and Hail laughed softly. "Ok, ok, we'll go with your plan."
"Is everything ok?" The twins smiled at the same time to Michiru who held an ice cream cone smiling happily.
"Yes, we were just talking about the maze. Do you girls want to go there?"
"Maze?" Kasumi, Haruka and Akira joined them after getting their drinks, the day at Pleasure Forest had turned out to be a great idea and they were having a great time.
"Yeah, it's pretty awesome right Hail?" Rain smiled at the girls and Hail nodded, glancing at Haruka who held a small drink in a bright colored cup in her hand.
"Is that a child size drink?"
Haruka shrugged, she only wanted a small drink and they gave her a kiddy glass with it. "I guess so."
"Aren't you like thirty years old?"
Akira chuckled, almost about to spill her drink as she saw Haruka's evil eyebrow twitched. "No I am not. We're almost the same age, I'm 22"
"That's pretty old for a kid's size drink still. I'm just saying…"
"Whatever." Haruka refused to fall on Hail's game; she kept sipping her drink and looked away. Michiru tried not to smile but Hail was just amusingly mean.
They started heading towards the maze and for a moment Hail and Michiru walked together alone behind of the rest of the group. "Hail."
"Yes?"
"You know about me and her don't you?"
Avoiding the deep sea eyes Hail walked next to the girl. "Who?"
"Haruka, you know. I'm sure you do because this whole week you've done everything possible to pick on her."
The redhead looked at Michiru, a small smile on her face "Am I that obvious?"
"Yeah. Haruka and I are together and if you know it then I don't see the point on pretending we're not."
"All I knew was that you and Kasumi were both chasing her down. Are you her girlfriend then?"
Michiru sighed softly. "I guess you could call it that, yes."
Hail stopped, the rest of the group still walking ahead of them. "You guess? Is she the person you said you were waiting for?"
"Yes, she is."
"And she hasn't asked you to be her girlfriend? Like you girls date?"
"We do, we're very close and…"
"Don't say more, I understand, but why are you not her girlfriend then, if you are so close."
Michiru lowered her blue eyes; she wondered the exact same thing. "It's complicated." Hail wanted to reply that it wasn't but again, she didn't want to put Michiru in an awkward position or made her mad at her.
"It's ok." Hail held Michiru's hand and smiled. "Here let's hurry, they're leaving us behind."
The maze was an elaborate garden with tall hedges; it was a popular attraction for the tourists, who could enjoy a leisure walk along the intricate pattern of alleys and aisles, beautiful marble statues and romantic corners.
"We should make it interesting, how about we make teams and meet at the exit?"
"Sure Rain let's do that." Kasumi smiled at Rain, she had wanted some time alone with her all morning to talk about the night before, but so far she had sat with Haruka in most of the rides, Hail seemed to be in a mission to keep Michiru around her all day and Haruka seemed to be losing her patience at an alarming rate. The two tomboys had fought all day directly and indirectly for Michiru's attention.
Akira wondered if she was going to be stuck with Haruka again, who was having a hard time keeping her jealousy under control, she hoped not. "So who goes with whom then?"
Haruka and Hail both looked at Michiru, and the aqua haired girl just smiled. "I will go with…"
Rain stepped up and grabbed Michiru's hands. "Me! Haruka and Hail have hogged you all day, it's my turn."Kasumi looked at Rain confounded she would have guessed the redhead wanted to find time with her but it didn't seemed that way.
Hail smiled charmingly at the raven haired girl. "Akira, would you like it want to be my partner then?"
"Sure, why not." Michiru looked at Haruka and smiled apologetically as she and Rain started walking away along with Akira and Hail.
"So I guess it is you and me Kasumi."
The willowy blonde smiled. "I guess so."
Haruka tended Kasumi her hand. "Let's go then." Holding Haruka's hand Kasumi felt a subtle joy, she saw know what Rain had tried to do, she had handsomely gave her time alone with Haruka, always living up to her word she was helping her as she promised. "Are you having fun Kasumi?"
"Yes, a lot." The tomboy smiled and Kasumi felt a sudden blush tint her cheeks pink, it was so confusing and hard, a single smile of Haruka brought down all her defenses, the touch of her hand made her entire body warm, if only Haruka gave her a sign of recognition, if she had one tiny light of hope to hold on to …
-0-
With crystalline laugh Kasumi looked at Rain making a perfect impersonation of Hail as the redhead sat next to Akira. The day had been just great, a prefect birthday. They were sitting by a bonfire, the sun have been down for a while; the blonde saw Michiru left for moment followed by Hail, Haruka seemed to follow them with her eyes but said nothing and sat next to Kasumi.
"Are you enjoying your birthday?"
"I am." It was true; she hadn't had so much fun in years. The excitement of the rides and the company of her friends and Haruka had lifted her spirits. Still remembering how Haruka held her hand briefly while they were together Kasumi smiled, even if just for today she had a good memory with Haruka as a keepsake.
Pulling a small package out of her jacket pocket Haruka extended it to Kasumi. "Happy Birthday."
Rain looked at Kasumi and Haruka, she didn't felt envious, but she did wished she could make Kasumi smiled the way Haruka did, than just laying her eyes on the blonde her ashen eyes would turned into shiny pearls."For me?"
The tomboy nodded and Kasumi held the small package unwrapping it slowly, inside was a silver bracelet with delicate moonstones. "They match your eyes." Kasumi looked at the moonstones shining on the bonfire light and her heart ached softly, had Haruka picked up this just for her? Has she thought of her eyes, did she think of her at all? "You don't like it?"
Kasumi shook her head; the tomboy looked at her confused. "No, I mean yes, I like it, it's just so beautiful. Thank you."
Haruka smiled at her and taking the bracelet from its small case she placed it round Kasumi's slender wrist. The gray eyes fixed themselves on the pianist fingers and she touched the tomboy's hand softly, the teal eyes looking at her. Kasumi opened her mouth, she wanted to say something, to make this moment last but as she was about to speak she noticed Michiru and Hail walking back, the aqua Muse holding a beautiful birthday cake, Hail holding a guitar.
Michiru smiled at her and Haruka moved away, Kasumi felt suddenly empty, the perfect moment had died.
Michiru placed the cake on a small table as Hail sat on one of the few chairs around the fire holding her guitar.
"I thought you only played the cello."
Hail smiled brightly and glanced at Haruka as she spoke. "Well, Akira, I am no 'musical prodigy' but I don't just play one instrument. I believe encasing one soul in a one instrument is … risky."
The blonde tomboy smiled at Hail in an unfriendly fashion and sat next to Michiru who cleared her throat softly, she had spent too much time today putting off fires between Hail and Haruka and right now it was not what she wanted to do. "Kas I hope you had a lot of fun, Happy Eighteenth Birthday." Hail started playing soft accords and Michiru closed her eyes, she wasn't a great singer but she believed everyone should have a birthday song, she sang the happy birthday along with Hail's guitar in her soft melodic voice, the harmonic guitar notes following her until the end.
When she was done, Michiru smiled and hugged Kasumi. "Happy Birthday!"
"Thanks Michi, really, thank you all for this great day."
The violinist smiled when an idea formed in her head. "Oh I know, how about instead of hearing me 'trying' to sing, you sing a song for us instead?"
"Sure." Kasumi looked at Hail. "Do you want to play for me or should I?"
Hail stood up and handed the blonde the guitar. "Be our star for today."
Nodding Kasumi sat down, she tuned the wooden guitar softly, her manicured fingers grazing the strings, Hail sat down next to her sister and Haruka and Michiru sat together, their fingers touching softly, the blonde noticed it and made a sad smile as she started to play…
When she opened her mouth and the first verses of the song came out she noticed everyone's eyes on her, her friends all knew she was a singer but she had never sang for them, except perhaps Michiru. Kasumi had a prodigious voice, vibrant like a violin string, full of sentiment and melodic, full of strength and passion; she had spent many hours of eternal practice to transform her voice into a perfectly tuned instrument…
Turn down the lights
Turn down the bed
Turn down these voices inside my head
Lay down with me, tell me no lies
Just hold me close, don't patronize
Don't patronize me.
She looked at Rain, her heart hurting with the certain feeling that in one day just a one day of spending time with Haruka, she had felt doubtful about being over her, again. Knowing Rain will never accept her if she wasn't whole, and that was something she could not give her.
Cause I can't make you love me if you don't
You can't make your heart feel something it won't
Here in the dark, in these final hours
I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power
Michiru looked at her friend as the blonde sang, feeling the angst on Kasumi's words, wondering how deep were her feelings for Haruka, and for Rain. She held Haruka's hand and the tomboy looked at her with a small smile yet she noticed the teal eyes went back to look at Kasumi, and Michiru wondered what was the light she just discovered on Haruka's eyes that she could not describe. Was this sting she felt jealousy?
But you won't, no you won't
Cause I can't make you love me if you don't.
Haruka looked at Kasumi, her song speaking to her and she felt sad, the voice of Kasumi evoking a deep sentiment in her heart, music was Haruka's world and despite the sadness in Kasumi's song she could not help but seeing past it and admired her beautiful voice. Kasumi was a muse, maybe not hers but certainly one, she was beautiful in an ethereal way and as she sing she was even more beautiful than when she tried too hard to look tantalizing, she only wished not to be the cause of the sadness in her voice as the blonde singer had started to grow fond of her.
I'll close my eyes, then I won't see
The love you don't feel when you're holding me
Morning will come and I'll do what's right
Just give me till then to give up this fight
And I will give up this fight.
Hail looked at Michiru and sighed, well it wasn't the end of the world, it was obvious Michiru was in love with Haruka and her battle was lost. She had never been one to cry over spilled milk, in a perfect world Michiru would have seen her the same way she looked at her but this wasn't a perfect world and she would have to just deal with it. Taking her verdant eyes from Haruka and Michiru, Hail looked at her sister and wished Rain was a little more like her for this, her sister's face was an open book, she was feeling sad and that hurt her deeply. Kasumi's song was not only speaking to everyone, it was screaming to Rain about a love she could not have, about a heart she could not reach and there wasn't anything she could do to protect her sister against it.
Cause I can't make you love me if you don't
You can't make your heart feel something it won't
Here in the dark, in these final hours
I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power
But you won't, no you won't
Cause I can't make you love me if you don't.
When Kasumi's song ended Rain was the only one who seemed to realize, she rose to her feet and walked to Kasumi. "Happy Birthday Kasumi." She gave the blonde an envelope and excusing herself she walked back to the house, she wasn't envious, she could feel no envy, but her heart was breaking, she had knew all along Kasumi longed Haruka but the blonde's song had slashed her defenses and she could only love her even more, adding her beautiful voice to the endless list of her qualities.
Kasumi placed down the guitar following Rain with her steel gaze, Hail sat by her side before the blonde could stood up and follow her sister. "Let her go. She'll be fine. If you keep running after her you will only make it worse, for both of you. Unless you love her back don't go find her, you'll just hurt her more. "
"I don't want to hurt her."
Hail nodded taking the guitar the blonde offered her back. "It is not your fault not to love her back, but it will be giving her false hope. I like you Kasumi, you're a nice girl, but I won't let you trample my sister's feelings."
The blonde looked into the green eyes; Hail's words contain no anger, if any the twin looked empathetic. "I won't."
Nodding Hail stood up and gave the blonde a small smile. "I guess we'll see you back in Tokyo then, I'm not sure we'll come by tomorrow."
"Ok."
Hail nodded again and stepped to where Michiru and Haruka sat down together still holding hands. "I guess we're leaving now."
"Is Rain ok?"
The redhead smiled and strapped her guitar. "Sure she is. We just have plans that's all. I will see you at school."
"I'll walk you to your car." Hail nodded and she and Michiru walked away from the bonfire towards the entrance. "Is Rain really ok?"
Hail stopped, she looked at Michiru thinking for a moment. "She will be. There is something I need to tell you, and it is really none of my business but I am going to say it anyway. "
"Ok…"
"You deserve someone that loves you, if Haruka is that someone she should compromise with you, she should ask you to be her girlfriend."
Michiru shrugged, she avoided the green eyes for a moment. "Maybe she is just one of those persons that don't ask that kind of question."
"Maybe, but it is hurting you. And you should tell her that, tell her you want more than assumptions, if it wasn't bothering you it wouldn't matter, but it is. Do you even know if she is not seeing other girls?"
"She isn't."
Hail nodded, it wasn't her position to force Michiru to do anything anyway. "Like I said it is not my business, but you know I care for you."
"Thanks Hail."
"Ok then, well goodnight Michi."
"Good Night…"
-0-
Looking at the untouched birthday cake on the table, Kasumi felt taken aback by sadness. "I guess I ruined my own party." Kasumi cut a piece of her birthday cake. "Do you want any cake Akira?"
Akira accepted a piece and looked at Kasumi. "You have a beautiful voice."
"Thank you. Maybe I should learn some peppy songs for party occasions."
"Yeah, you should." Akira smiled at her and the blonde smiled back.
"I think I am going to call it a night too." Placing down her cake Kasumi looked at Haruka. "Good night."
"Good night Kas."
"Thanks for the bracelet."
"No problem."
-0-
"Cheer up Rain, you're making me depressed." Hail sat on the padded bench by the window on Rain's studio, in her hand one of the sketches her sister had made the night before. "Did you have sex with her?"
Rain looked up from her half finished canvas with startled expression. "Of course not."
"You sure seem to have a fertile imagination then; these sketches are very detailed, terribly in fact." Blushing softly Rain went back to her work. "Oh no, no you didn't, she was naked when you did this didn't you?"
Her twin nodded and sighed heavily, placing her fan brush down and looking at Hail. "Nothing happened, nothing will ever happen as long as this world has Haruka Tenoh in it."
"Bah, I doubt either Michiru or Kasumi feel true love for Haruka, they are seventeen after all."
"You said that because you don't even believe in true love yourself."
"I do. I'm just sure Kasumi has a severe case of infatuation not of true love."
"And Michiru?" Lying back on the pillows and re-examining the nude sketch of Kasumi, Hail stayed quit for a moment. "She seems pretty in love to me."
Dismissing her sister words Hail spoke "We should go out tomorrow night, let's skip the 'boulevard of broken dreams' and go out, you and me to find some single, warm and legal girls."
"I don't fancy going out to pick up girls."
"For this?" Hail jumped to her feet and dropped the sketch in Rain's desk. "Do you love her?"
"I like her a lot."
"With true love? Has your heart stopped beating in your chest at the sight of her beauty? Has she stolen your sleep and you longed for her misty eyes?"
"You're a jerk; you're making fun of my feelings."
Hail slide an arm around her sister shoulders hugging her. "If it is true love she will come back to you, don't you believe in that? You must, you are a helpless romantic."
"If I go out with you tomorrow will you leave me to my work?"
"Sure, as long as you promise me not to spend the night sighing over your nude muse sketches."
"You have no heart Hail. Are you just simply over Michiru? Just like that?"
Hail looked at her polished nails, her forest eyes inexpressive. "I believe love can't be forced, either you feel it or you don't. If she wants me she knows exactly where to find me, if she comes I will open my arms for her, if she doesn't then I am looking in the wrong place."
"You sound pretty mature for being such an ass." Hail laughed softly.
"I love you too…"
-0-
When Kasumi closed the door behind her ready to go to bed and put this day behind her she realized she had left the envelope Rain had gave her on the table by the fire. Sighing she tirelessly slipped back on her dress and headed down the hallway, she ran into Michiru, the violinist by the stove in the kitchen.
"I am making tea before heading back out, do you want some?"
"No thanks, I was actually heading to bed but I forgot something outside."
"Oh, ok. Kasumi…Rain loves you, you know that ah?"
"…yeah."
"And?"
"Nothing."
"Mmmm." Michiru went back to her tea, Kasumi doubtful as whether to stay or go. "Haruka hasn't asked me to be her girlfriend yet, I don't know what to do."
Kasumi touched her hair, Michiru was giving her back at her and she thanked it because she wasn't sure what was her expression as the violinist spoke. "Why are you telling me this?"
"Because you are my best friend, or used to be, I am not even sure anymore."
"I still am." Michiru turned around, her eyes low.
"Then tell me what to do."
"I don't know. I really don't." Michiru nodded softly and went back to pour her tea. "She might tell you any day now right? You are pretty close and she might just be waiting for the right moment. You…you could always ask her to be your girlfriend instead."
Michiru brought her tea cup up to her lips and drank the perfumed brew slowly. "Thanks Kas, you're right, maybe I should. I feel better already."
"I'm glad…" Kasumi felt a knot on her throat, she had spoken with honesty but that didn't change the fact that she felt hurt by the situation. "I will go get that thing I left outside, I'll be right back."
"Ok. And Kas…"
"Yes?"
"Thanks. You're still my best friend, always."
The blonde nodded and exited through the kitchen door, the night outside was warm and fragrant; she walked along the path that headed to the beach, her mind lost in so many thoughts…
Akira and Haruka headed back to the house, everyone seemed gone after Kasumi's song. "You seem very quiet lately Haruka."
"I have a lot on my mind. I am tired of hiding; I wish I could hold Michiru's hand without thinking someone will find it wrong. Michiru means too much to me."
"Are you really done playing double dating then? Are you absolutely sure? Kasumi still seems to have a soft spot for you, we can all tell."
"Kasumi is a beautiful girl, I am sure she will find someone worth her love."
"She certainly is, too pretty."
Haruka laughed softly. "If you like her why don't you ask her out?"
The dark haired girl shook her head as they approach the lake house. "I'm too old for her and she is too young for me."
"Hey I resent that."
Smiling Akira looked at Haruka. "It is different, besides she is too much for me to handle she looks like that kind of girl that could break my heart on a whim."
"That she does. Especially with that voice of hers. I never thought such a slender girl could sing like that..."
"I know, I knew she had to have a nice voice but that song sent a shiver down my spine."
Haruka nodded. "Muses everywhere man, everywhere."
"You and your muses. It's hard to keep track, so what's Michiru? The violin muse?"
"I only have one muse, My Butterfly Muse, Michiru."
Akira looked at Haruka confused. "What? I thought your Butterfly muse had turned out to be Kasumi."
"It's a long story, but in short words Kasumi wasn't, Michiru is."
"Wow, really?"
"Really…"
"So you are reunited and in love with your Butterfly muse? How charming, when are you going to tell her?"
Kasumi stopped as she heard the muffled voices of Haruka and Akira approached, she eavesdropped unintentionally and was about to leave when she heard the words Butterfly Muse and she instantly felt stung by curiosity. Biting her lower lip she hid behind a tree as the friends came closer down the path towards the house.
"I can't tell My Muse that I love her, it is too soon, we're not there just yet I have tried all day to have a moment alone with her but something interrupts us every time."
"Yeah, I saw you today; you can barely take your eyes off her."
"I know, I surprise myself sometimes, I want her so badly, did you listen to her today? Like she wasn't already perfect, graceful and beautiful she sings like an angel."
Akira half smiled, Michiru's happy birthday song was not exactly comparable to Kasumi's song but in any case for Haruka the voice of Michiru must have sounded like heaven. "Yes, very talented indeed, your muse is quite the talent."
Haruka nodded convinced. "I never thought I would fall in love so badly for her. I wish I could just tell her."
"Oh that's easy, lure her to a secluded place and whisper to her ear 'oh my muse I love you so…'" Akira laughed and Haruka gave her a dirty look.
"Well I could, if you weren't acting as the world's most efficient guard dog…" Kasumi could not hear anymore of the conversation as the friends finally entered the house but it didn't mattered, her heart was pounding rapidly inside her chest with an unknown strength, Haruka always thought she was the Butterfly muse, Akira had said it herself and she never cleared out that she wasn't, it didn't seemed important at the time. And now she just heard the tomboy saying that she had loved her voice, she had called her perfect and graceful, and they had spent the whole day together, even holding hands while they were at the maze.
Kasumi could not believe what she had just heard; Haruka hadn't asked Michiru to be her girlfriend because she was in love with her, that was the only explanation, the sign she had waited for was just shining upon her, Haruka loved her and she will find a way to force the confession of her lips…
(A/N: I guess there isn't much to say…is there? Review!)