Mend This Tear- chapter seven
DISCLAIMER: The Mentalist does not belong to me. It is the creation of Bruno Heller. I'm writing this fiction to express my love for the series and maybe vent a little.
"What are you doing?" Jane had asked the nurse, as she fiddled with the oxygen tank. The kind woman, who introduced herself as Isabella, explained that it was just a precaution.
Jane waited for her to finish so he could take a better look at Lisbon.
Finally, the nurse moved away and Jane was able to come closer to Lisbon's bed. He tried to listen as Cho asked about their boss's status. It wasn't easy; it was as if the voices were coming from far away. Patrick could barely hear them. He did register Isabella's words when she said sincerely that Lisbon was fine, but it did nothing to reassure Jane.
How can she be fine? Her face was ashen, making her freckles more pronounced. Her lips looked dry, like she was dehydrated and there were tiny red dots, no bigger than pinpricks around her eyes. Petechial hemorrhaging, Patrick knew, due to some sort of trauma. Her lips and nails were bluish from lack of oxygen.
She also looked thin, tiny in her hospital gown. In all their years of working together, Jane had never seen her like this. Lisbon rarely got sick, and avoided anyone who was like the plague; threatening them with stake out duty should they infect her. Sure, she got a common cold a couple of times a year, usually around winter, but nothing that required her to take a sick day. Jane knew she only did so when she was overworked to the point of being physically unable to get out of bed.
Which is why he had a hard time believing the preliminary diagnosis.
He would have noticed if Lisbon had asthma wouldn't he?
One of his daughter's playmates had suffered from it. Whenever Nancy would come over she'd have an inhaler with her. And her parents always reminded Patrick and Angela that they needed to call them the instant their daughter exhibited any symptoms; wheezing, shortness of breath. Her mother had explained once that it was a chronic illness and that asthma attacks could be triggered by the environment; pollen, smoke, even perfume.
Jane also remembered that they could also be triggered by emotional stress.
Could this be my fault, he ruminated; aghast at the idea.
Jane knew he had been forceful with Lisbon during the Farlow case; first, in declaring his intention for vengeance, then keeping her in the dark about suspecting Todd.
But despite Angela's accusation that he had undermined Lisbon in front of Hightower, Patrick refused to be held accountable for his actions. He certainly hadn't intended to rile Teresa up. In fact, he still maintained that it had been mostly her fault...
Todd Johnson became Jane's primary suspect after he attacked Rusty, the diner cook, at CBI. The consultant had instantly realized that Todd's anger was fake and guessed that he'd come to their office under the guise of revenge when he actually just wanted to find out how far they were in their investigation.
But before Jane could share any of this with Lisbon she had ordered Cho to lock Todd up and charge him with assault. She then marched into her office. Her angry strides and refusal to look at Jane told him that she was trying to teach him a lesson through the EMT captain.
Well that was neither here nor there, Patrick had thought. They had a case to solve.
He followed Lisbon into her office.
"Let him go."
"Let him go?" she asked blankly, looking at him from where she stood behind her desk.
"Yes, let him go," Jane repeated, hands in his jacket pockets.
"The man assaulted a suspect in our own house, your fault, by the way for spurring him on with your 'revenge works splendidly' talk, why should I let him go?"
"Because he's a suspect."
"Is he now," Lisbon asked with a fake smile, sitting at her desk.
"Yup," Jane nodded.
"What makes you say that?"
He shrugged.
"Right, I forgot. What's the fun in explaining your reasoning? God forbid I deprive you from your 'ta-da' moment," she said wearily.
"I'm so glad you understand," Jane grinned.
"Do I? You say he's a suspect but you could just be sympathizing with him. Maybe you want him free to commit his revenge when we catch the actual perp," she stated.
"Hmm. Tough call," Jane conceded, nodding, looking upwards to hide how fazed he was by her suspicion.
"So which is it?" Teresa demanded.
"He really is a suspect," Jane replied, looking at Lisbon with his best sincere expression.
Lisbon sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.
"Let's say I believe you, which, I'm not sure I do, half the floor saw the assault. It's not like I can just let Todd walk, no questions asked because you say he's a suspect. Especially since if that were true then we'd have even more of an incentive to hold him."
"Is this your way of saying we should take this to Hightower?" Jane asked impatiently, eyebrows raised.
Slowly, Lisbon lowered her hand from her face, and looked up at Jane, trying to understand what he was driving at.
Was he really threatening to go over her head if she didn't agree?
"So that you won't be held accountable if he ends up doing 'anything foolish', Jane explained, removing his hands from his pockets to gesture quotes with his fingers; using the same phrase she had when she referred to Jane's own plan for revenge.
Lisbon eyebrows got that line between them, a sure tell of her annoyance.
"Let's go."
It is difficult to say how much of their argument in Hightower's office was fact and how much was fiction.
They both tended to express more through their charades than they ever intended. It was why he was so hurt when she snapped "bite me!" during the haunted house case. And why he had frozen when she called him on his egotistical crap when they faked an argument in front of Hardy. And why his heart practically stopped when she threw a chair through her office window during her fake breakdown when she was accused of killing Mcteer.
Because none of those occurrences had been part of the plan.
That being the case, Jane felt he should have foreseen the cold war which ended up taking place in the Bureau Head's office.
"Vengeance is not legal, people need to know that," Lisbon had said emphatically, drawing Jane's eyes to her in quiet rage.
Really? People? Lisbon couldn't have been more obvious if she had been pointing her finger at him.
Well, if she was going to be that way...
"So I have justice and humanity on my side while Lisbon has a teachable moment," he countered, asking Hightower to give him a chance to talk to Todd, that he'd make him forget about vengeance.
"You think you can do that?" Hightower had asked skeptically.
All he needed to say was yes. Madeline would have believed him. But he couldn't pass up the opportunity to put Lisbon in her place. As far as he was concerned, she had started it.
"I know I can. I've been there," he said beatifically, lying through his teeth to Madeline.
Patrick didn't miss the look on Lisbon's face, equal parts disbelief and dismay when her boss had completely bought his act.
Satisfied with his victory, Jane had caught Lisbon's eye before he left; daring Lisbon to contradict him, knowing she wouldn't. He had practically heard the sorrowful "touché" conveyed in her eyes before he left to talk to Todd to gain his confidence.
For once, Jane hadn't needed to lie to a suspect. Instead, he spoke from the well of darkness within his own soul. Leaving Todd to mull over his options, Jane headed down to make himself some tea.
Patrick's advice to the man had left him feeling hollow with knowledge that every word he had spoken was true. Glancing at Lisbon's office, Jane couldn't help the pang of guilt which came with the knowledge that when the time came, he'd do whatever it took to get Red John. The pang only increased when he saw her straightening her desk; a sure sign of her agitation.
His heart went out to the woman.
Teresa's 'vengeance isn't legal' statement had practically been a cry for help. Her old boss Virgil Minelli would have perfectly understood that she was alluding to Jane, not just the suspect. But the reference had completely gone over Madeline's head.
Jane knew that Lisbon hadn't intended to threaten him with exposure; that her statement had been an emotional outburst as a result of their revenge conversation the previous night. Even so, Jane hadn't been able to help retaliating; he had wanted to punish her. Watching her nervous hands flutter over her pens, Jane inwardly admitted that he had been irked by her idealism, her refusal to come around to his view. Mostly over the fact that, despite himself, he had been just as rattled by their stalemate as she was.
Feeling somewhat repentant for his unnecessarily demeaning behavior, Jane made a second cup of tea and carried both into Lisbon's office to make amends.
Watching her now, unconscious and small in the emergency room bed, Jane felt choked with the memory of how defeated Lisbon had looked when he left Hightower's office, and how upset she had been when he later came to her office.
Lisbon, bless her, had forgiven him like she always does. By the time Todd knocked on her door, telling them he was ready to talk to Hightower, they tacitly decided to put the matter behind them. Neither would forget what had happened; but they'd sure ignore it as long as they could. Instead of dwelling on the real source of their conflict, they sallied forth to finish the case, wanting to put the shift in their dynamic behind.
But now Jane wondered if, in fact, Teresa had remained upset, but kept that feeling hidden from him.
Patrick's stomach churned. He remembered how worried Lisbon had been a few months ago when he jokingly threatened her with revenge for tricking him into working the Harvey Dublin case. She had looked so struck and had been so nervous throughout the investigation that he had actually taken pity on her and told her that he wouldn't punish her. Lisbon hadn't been convinced. At the time Jane found her anxiety to be an amusing overreaction.
Yes, he had a mean streak, Jane had thought, but he'd never use it against her. At least he hadn't thought he would.
The consultant now knew that his boss's fears had been justified; that he wasn't above using her weaknesses against her.
"Jane!" Cho's sharp tone brought Jane from his musings.
"Yeah?" Jane replied, his voice a little raspy. From crying earlier that night, he told himself as he forced himself to focus on Cho. It was very difficult.
"You okay? That's the third time I called your name." Jane realized that the senior agent was standing quite close to him, and had a hand on his shoulder.
"I'm fine," Jane replied, feeling his lips curving up into his default smile.
"Hightower needs me to come in tomorrow to fill for Lisbon. You're staying with her right? If so then I can go home catch a few hours of sleep."
"Yeah, yeah, I'll be here," Jane said absentmindedly, sitting down on the chair Cho had vacated, glad the man was leaving.
He had a lot to think about.
Author's Note: Hello everyone! I'm so looking forward to tonight's episode and wanted to give you something to tide you over. This chapter featured one of the earliest parts I've written for this fic and I'm so glad I can finally use it. Please let me know if it's as interesting as I think it is. Also, don't miss LittleMenders's beautiful Valentine fic, Hearts and Chocolates. Also, *shameless plug* if you're interested in reading a review for the episode "Blood for Blood", you can find one I wrote by following the link on my author page. Happy late Valentines day: show your love by leaving a review ;)