Mend This Tear- chapter thirteen

DISCLAIMER: The Mentalist does not belong to me. It is the creation of Bruno Heller. I'm writing this fiction to express my love for the series and maybe vent a little.

Wayne knocked softly on the door to the attic before slowly opening it. It was his first time up there and he wasn't sure what to expect. Looking around, he found Jane lying on his back on a makeshift bed, eyes closed.

"Jane?" he called out softly, taking a couple of hesitant steps inside. Jane raised his head.

"Oh, hey Rigsby," gesturing him inside, laying back down. He could use a distraction from his toxic thoughts, and the young agent was usually good at providing one, asking Jane to perform magic tricks and whatnot. "What brings you to my humble abode?"

"How's boss?"

Apparently, not this time.

"She's fine."

"How are you holding up?"

"Me?" Jane asked, with a raised eyebrow.

"You're worried about her that can't be fun," Rigsby said, somewhat lamely.

"No, Rigsby, it's not fun," Jane stated in monotone, keeping his face neutral.

Wayne put his hands in his pockets self consciously, unsure how to proceed. Sensing his discomfort Jane sighed before sitting up and patting the place next to him, inviting Rigsby to sit down. He had a feeling he'd regret it but Patrick could see that the mild mannered agent needed to talk, and he didn't have it in him to turn the forlorn looking man away.

"What's up?"

"You shouldn't take it personally, she's just always been like that," Rigsby blurted out.

Jane hid his surprise, not a difficult task as Rigsby was looking away from him. It gave the former an opportunity to observe him as he thought about what prompted the consolation. Rigsby hadn't been at the bullpen when Jane had returned from the hospital. Obviously Grace and Cho filled him in on what happened. But even if Jane's depression had been apparent, they wouldn't ask Rigsby to give him a heart to heart. Everyone knew he was somewhat wary of talking to the mentalist. So why was he here?

Have I become that predictable?

"I know," Jane answered at length. At his reply, Wayne let out a deep breath, as if he had been nervous of Jane's reaction to his speaking so candidly. It made the man's presence even more intriguing to Jane. He nodded, encouraging the arson specialist to say what was on his mind.

"It's not easy coming from that kind of home," Rigsby continued haltingly, avoiding eye contact, "I mean I don't know how it was, exactly, no one knows. But it's not hard to connect the dots. There are… commonalities between... people like that."

People like us, Patrick heard, and everything became clear. It wasn't himself that Rigsby emphasized with, it was Lisbon.

"Yeah I know," he assured Rigsby in spite of his own doubts, "Don't worry about it."

"She'll be okay though, right? I don't mean physically, Cho told me she'll be fine, I mean, she's…stress-wise…" Rigsby stopped, at a loss of how to best explain his concerns, before trying again. "This whole Johnson thing is pretty bad. I hear the PSU is going to do an investigation. She's not going to lose it is she? Like she did over Mcteer?"

Patrick didn't point out that Teresa's psychotic break at the time had been a ruse to set up Dr. Carmen. After all, he'd come up with the plan and he'd still been shocked when that chair went through the window. He could only imagine what it looked like to the team. Like him, they probably suspected that part hadn't been entirely fake.

"No Rigsby, she's fine," Jane assured him, noting his face relax with relief.

Now that the hard part was over words came much easier to Rigsby.

"I would have visited her but I only found out this morning. Plus Cho said she was probably leaving soon, and I'm at work. I doubt she'd want me there anyway. She probably wouldn't want anyone to see her like that," Wayne stated, looking at Jane for confirmation.

"You could stop by her home later after work. I don't think she'd mind that."

"Yeah?"

"Mm," Jane affirmed with a smile, thinking that while Lisbon might be a bit bothered, she'd also be very affected by the gesture.

"Maybe I will."

They both knew he'd chicken out.

"So tell me, 'people like that', how do you get them to emotionally commit? To trust?" Jane asked casually.

"Don't ask me, I have no clue. All I know is that it takes someone truly special; an angel," Rigsby said, looking off in the distance.

Well then I guess I'm screwed.

Jane knew he was more of a devil than an angel. More importantly, he didn't believe in such things. It would be more comforting than he deserved to imagine Angela and Charlotte as angels, flying in heaven. He didn't deserve that kind of absolution.

But he knew by 'angel' Rigsby was referring to a certain redhead; that he meant earthbound angels.

And those Patrick did believe in.

"You still love her don't you?" he stated.

Rigsby took in a shuddering breath, and Jane felt a part of his cold heart melt in empathy.

"Let's just say I don't blame boss one bit for preferring to go at it alone. She's a lot smarter than I am," he said, voice husky with emotion.

"You're a lot braver than she is," Jane found himself saying. He realized he wished Lisbon would take a chance as Rigsby had done; not that he wanted a romantic relationship with her, just for her to open up more.

Wayne shook his head.

"Don't say that. Boss is brave, she's plenty brave. She's just doing what she thinks is right for everyone. I'm sure of it."

"How is distancing yourself from your colleagues good for anyone?" Jane asked, inwardly amused at the irony of such a question coming from himself.

He knew what his own reasons were for doing so, but he was interested in hearing Rigsby's perspective on what Lisbon's intentions were.

"It allows her to make the tough calls," Rigsby said simply, then gave Jane a wry smile.

"She still can't help caring though."

"No?"

"You didn't see her when Rachel kidnapped you. She was all over the place, even made a deal to testify on behalf of Linus Wagner in exchange for information to find you," at Jane's puzzled look he elaborated, "Rachel had been in contact with him,"

This was news to Patrick.

"Really?" he couldn't help asking, nor keeping the disbelief out of his voice.

Lisbon would have absolutely hated having to do that.

Wayne nodded.

"And I don't have to remind you how crazy she went when Dylan and Ruth kidnapped you…"

Jane smiled at the memory.

"I'm still trying to forget that night. I have more nightmares about her than I do about meeting Red John," he exaggerated.

Lisbon had been furious with Jane for putting himself in that position; she'd told him to stay put at CBI.

Wayne stood up and walked to the door, then turned around to give a final piece of advice.

"I know more than anyone how terrible unrequited love is Jane," he said, indifferent to Patrick's mouth falling open slightly at his words, "but she does care about you, that'll just have to be good enough. It hurts, but it gets a bit better with time so hang in there."

By the time he finished his little speech Jane had managed to gather himself enough to reply.

"I appreciate your frankness Rigsby, but I think you may be projecting a bit.

Especially the 'unrequited love' part.

Rigsby gave him a knowing smile.

"If you say so," he said, leaving.

Authors note:

Guys, I have a confession: I think I love this chapter. Please let me know if you do too Also, I know the last few chapters have been short, but I couldn't pace them better. I'm trying to wrap the story up ASAP as I'm going to get very busy soon and I don't want to leave you hanging as I don't know when I'll able to write again. Hopefully the muses will continue to inspire and reviews will continue to help. Only three more left! Also, to tide us over till the next episode, I set up a post on my blog where you can write out your guess for who Red John's accomplice is. After the 31st, I'll set up a poll where readers can vote on which theory they think is most likely. Come season finale, it'll be interesting to see who got it right, or came closest. You can find the link on my author page.