"I watched him die."

Andy was sitting, practically catatonic on the bed, still covered in blood; Sean's blood, from head to toe.

"I could have saved him and instead I just stayed there." Her knees were pulled up to her chest and she was trying to keep herself from crying.

Sam himself had a lump in his throat. After watching Sean die, now seeing Andy tear herself apart because she felt responsible wasn't helping.

"Andy, you couldn't have done anything. If it wasn't today, it would have been tomorrow, or next week. You couldn't have saved him, couldn't have protected him forever," Sam said, trying to be the voice of reason.

But Andy didn't want to be reasonable. She barely registered the words that Sam was spitting back were her own words when Sam had volunteered to go undercover with her.

Sam was covered in blood; his own and Sean's, but he wanted to take care of Andy first.

"Let's go get you cleaned up," Sam said, and when Andy made no move to get up, he scooped her up and carried her into the bathroom.

He sat her on the toilet cover and handed her a wet towel. She began scrubbing furiously, and that's when the tears began to fall.

"It won't come off," she kept saying. "It won't come off." She kept scrubbing at her face till the soft skin turned red and still she kept going, down her neck and arms too. Even if it did come off, she could still see his haunting eyes, begging her to help him as he got shot.

"Andy, stop!" Sam exclaimed, grabbing her arms when he saw what she was doing.

Andy collapsed into his arms, sobbing. Sam held her tight, not saying anything because he knew that nothing he would say would make a difference. Sam let a few tears of his own fall; the only mourning he would do.

Eventually, she calmed down enough and pulled back, remembering something. "You got hit didn't you?"

"No, I'm fine," Sam said, trying to pass it off as nothing.

"Let's see it," Andy demanded, and he knew enough not to mess with her when she was in this state.

He peeled off his shirt and Andy immediately grabbed a bottle of disinfectant and a clean towel. She doused the towel with it and went to press it on his wound.

"Honestly I'm fine-," Sam started, but she ignored him with one of her famous eye rolls, and placed it on the cut.

"Ahh," he said, clutching the edge of the sink as the disinfectant stung his body. His muscles tightened, but released slowly as he got used to the sting.

Andy finished cleaning it out and taped a piece of gauze on the wound. "There, much better," she said when she was finished, but she didn't move away.

Sam turned to face her, one of her hands still on his bare chest. Wherever she touched left a hot trail on his skin. He fought his urges, not wanting to take advantage of her, especially at a time like this.

She brought her other hand up, placing it on his chest, and sliding her hands up, causing him to shiver. She pressed closer to him, so their bodies were touching. Almost as if he couldn't stop himself, he brought him arms around her, holding her even closer.

"Sam." It was a sigh in his ear.

He groaned. "Stop making this so hard," he said, forcing himself to pull away.

"What?" she asked surprised.

"Staying away from you," he said, a little surprised he admitted it.

"Then don't," she responded, with a small smile. When he still didn't move, she went up to him, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Please."

If this was what she wanted, who was he to judge? he asked himself, as he crushed his lips to hers.

Sparks ignited and their kissing became needier. Sam hoisted her up and Andy wrapped her legs around his torso.

She kissed his neck as he walked back to the bed, lying her down. He hovered over and paused, looking at her.

"Are you sure you want this?" Sam asked, panting.

"More than anything," she said, and pulled him back down on top of her.

She wanted and needed him more than anything right now. If she was going to be completely honest to herself, she had always wanted him. And now that she was no longer with Luke, she was free to do as she pleased.

She might have felt guilty for a second, thinking about Luke, but she soon forgot about it when Sam tugged off her shirt and kissed his way down her body.

That night, she gave herself completely to Sam.

Feeling his hands all over her body, touching him and loving his reactions, feeling him inside her. Sam erased the feelings of both Luke and Sean, and she was able to concentrate all on him.

He made her feel different; a way that Luke never had, and it scared her, but also left her with a tingling covering her whole body.

This night had been building up over all the months they spent undercover together, maybe even before that.

Maybe it was meant to be, she thought to herself as she looked up at his face smiling serenely down at her.

She got the best night's sleep she had had in months.