Disclaimer: I do not own the copyright for Waking the dead or its characters – all rights belong to the BBC

Content: Heartache, angst, friendship

Rating T

Hey everyone. I hope you are still reading and enjoying. I actually wrote the final chapter last evening which I am excited about so I am looking forward to tying this altogether. Please leave a review. Thank you x

Beyond Grace

Chapter 4

Boyd pulled his arms through the white lab coat as he continued to make his way to the lab were Eve sat. "Are you okay?" he asked her placing a hand on her shoulder.

"No, not really, I can't take this in Boyd. Why Grace, it all seems so meaningless."

"I dunknow Eve. I've been going out of my mind trying to find answers to make some sort of sense of it but I have nothing." The tone of Boyd's voice told Eve he was in trouble. Never before had she seen him look so vulnerable, so afraid. He was always so cock sure, confident even when he knew he was entirely wrong he would still persist and argue his point. Yet he stood before her so broken and lost.

"What about you" she gently asked him "How are you doing?"

Boyd looked up at her for a moment before finding the words to reply, wondering how much to give away of himself. He no longer cared about his stature or position. "It hurts Eve here"" he said placing his hand over his heart. "It always hurts here when I loose someone. It hurt with Mel, with Stella, with Sarah. I didn't think I would find a way back when I lost Luke, it was Grace who helped me through you know and now …" his voice trailed off as he lowered his gaze trying to control the rush of emotion surging through his body. "Now it's as if all that loss, all that hurt has returned to haunt me."

'You're ill Boyd ….. repressed, depressed and in denial.' He was unable to deny it now.

Eve stood silently for a moment unsure of what to do. Boyd wasn't a man who easily opened up like that and she knew it was a big thing for him to have done so. He was not one for touchy feely stuff but in that moment Eve wanted to reach out to him in all his vulnerability. Instinctively she stood up and wrapped her arms around him pulling him close in a hug. He tensed up and resisted it at first but with a deep sigh he relented and held her tighter knowing that in that moment she needed to be held as much as he did. As they stood drawing on one another's strength Eve felt the wetness on the back of her neck as a tear escaped Boyd's control.

"Are you sure you are ready to see this photo?" Boyd released himself from her grip before he was completely helpless.

"To be honest, no, but then I don't think I will ever be ready but I need too. If we are going to find her we have got to start somewhere." As much as Boyd knew he needed to let Eve and Spence have sight of photo part of him wanted to protect them from it and spare them from the same fate he had been assigned to the first moment he had laid eyes on it. Reaching into his pocket he retrieved the envelope and quietly set it on the table in front of Eve. She stood holding it in her gloved hands turning it back and forward before finally removing its contents. In one fluid movement she dropped the photo on the table and covered her mouth with her hand shrieking as she did. Her eyes instinctively closed but it was too late, the damage was done.

"Eve …. Eve" Boyd placed a hand on her back his voice bringing her back into the room. "Eve are you okay"

"Erm yea, yea I'm fine ….. even though I thought I was prepared for it it was just a shock you know." Eve felt sick

"Yea I know" Boyd's voice full of understanding. Eve picked up the photograph again and this time tried to look at it with the mind of a scientist and not of a friend.

"So is there anything that stands out here Eve, anything that we can go on? Boyd knew the answer to that question already but he was helpless and hoped that she would spot something straight away that he had missed.

"The first thing I'll do is run the envelope and photograph for prints, we may even get some saliva DNA from the envelope. "

"My prints will be on there too, I'm sorry Eve, I didn't know what I was holding when I opened the it. But you hold my prints anyway so you can eliminate them."

"Yes of course" she continued. "I will also scan and enlarge it, look see here….." she said pointing at the gun at the top "….the serial number of this particular make usually runs along the barrel. I can't tell from this photo but we might be able to get something from a larger image."

"Great anything you can tell us Eve, whatever it takes yea."

"Yes of course."

He gently smiled as he turned to leave.

"We will bring her back home Boyd."

"I know, I just wish she was here now." With that the glass doors slid closed behind him and Eve was alone with her thoughts and memories.

Grace I will do everything I can here, come on help me out.

Boyd could see that Spence carrying an armful of files from Graces' office to his own desk. He dropped them on the top and with a heavy sigh as he sat.

"Is that it all" Boyd enquired as he approached where the DI was working.

"Well all the files that were on top of her desk anyway, I assume these were the most recent she was working through." Spence answered barely lifting his head.

"Okay, good." pausing briefly before adding, "whatever you can find Spence, anything at all, no matter how insignificant." Spence could tell that Boyd was grasping at straws as he spoke.

"Of course" he nodded "No stone unturned eh."

Boyd caught his eye and smiled softly nodding his head "Yea no stone." before turning away towards his own office.

"Boyd" Spence's voice made him stop and turn once again to face him.

"Yea?"

"Is there anything at all you are holding back from us, someone you might suspect?" Boyd could tell from the tone of his voice that this was less of an accusation than before and more of a genuine searching for some sort of answer to help with the numerous questions that were currently racing through the DIs mind. He approached Spence's desk and held eye contact with him.

"I swear to you Spence, as God is my judge, you know what I know. I am as much in the dark about this as you are." Boyd's statement and the look in his eyes were enough for Spence to believe him. He had known Boyd for many years. They had worked closely together and although there were many things on which they didn't see eye to eye on, there were more things about him that Spence admired. He knew him to be a just man, and knew that even though he often didn't show it, he cared deeply for his team, especially Grace. They spent more time in each other's office than they did in their own. It was a familiar sight to see them huddled together, deep in conversation, or arguing loudly. Man they knew how to argue. It would unnerve the younger members of the team who happened to be in earshot when a row erupted, usually without warning and out of nothing. Spence inwardly smiled at the memory of Stella's first experience of this. She had been so childlike in her disbelief of what was unfolding before her.

"Spence shouldn't you do something?" She had asked, wide eyed and in horror as she listened to the raised voices and swearing that was permeating the bullpen.

"No, you learn not to get involved. They'll be fine." Spence gazed in the direction of Boyd's office were this particular fight was ensuing.

"But, he is so angry, he's going to lose control." Stella continued with concern.

"It sounds as if Grace is holding her own." Spence replied, "Don't worry Stella, they will be all hearts and flowers tomorrow."

"I don't understand how they could after this." her tone genuinely confused.

"Believe me, this is nothing, there has be much … much … worse." Spence said with a knowing smile. "Give it a couple of minutes and he'll throw her out, then the door will slam and both will sit sulking in their own office until one or other gives in and apologises or they think of something else that proves them right and continue the screaming match. Happens all the time"

"And they say the French are bad, you people are crazy." Stella said shaking her head before they both burst into laughter as on cue the door slammed loudly in the background and the sound of Grace swearing reverberated around the office.

"Told you." Spence smiled.

So many times Spence had wished they would just sort themselves out, stop all the pointless arguing, yet in that moment he would give anything just to hear another door slam and Grace swearing under her breath as she stormed back to her own office. For all their fighting he knew their friendship ran deep. No-one else could have ever been able to behave that way with Boyd, or at least lived to tell the tale after they did. Boyd respected her more than he did anyone else and valued her opinion more than he would ever openly admit.

As Boyd stood before him Spence could see clearly the look of loss in his eyes and knew that his boss was trying desperately hard to hold it together but was perilously close to failing.

"Okay Boyd, I'm sorry, I had to ask yea."

"That's okay Spence" Boyd placed his hand on his shoulder and gave his junior a reassuring pat. "I understand."

Boyd turned expressing air as he continued his way to back to the safe confines of his office. It was true the team had been through some hard times over the years but Boyd was fully aware that this was going to be the most difficult challenge yet.

TBC