I do what I can and I do what I do, and none of those things were writing Twilight.

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Chapter 3: A Party Etched

Sue gave a smile back with the same ice as she gave Esme. Most of them avoid looking at her in fear of being turned into stone. Mama bear don't play.

Sarah was still clutched to my chest as I subconsciously rocked her back and forth. I could feel her getting heavier as she started to fall asleep on my shoulder. I smiled affectionately at her as she reminded me of the other reasons I came here. They were not going to rule over my life like they did when we were kids. This time I called the shots.

I had an epiphany of sorts as I stared at Sarah for a moment as Sue was taking care of their coats. Her dislike of them was well known, but she in hostess mode right now. My main goal these last two years would be graduating high school, worrying about colleges, and spending as much time away from the drama life brought me in this little town and closer to the people that are implanted in my heart. The only way I was going to get closure was to take this in steps. I've survived the first meeting, but the next was handling it by myself without the guys or Sue there. As terrifying as it sounds, I think I can handle it.

"You wanna go to sleep, Sarah-pop?" She shook her head no and whined, but her body was telling her to stay on the makeshift pillow. I snickered quietly and forgot I had an audience when I looked up to tell Sue I was going to take her up stairs.

Esme looked at me with pain in her eyes, but smiled anyways when I looked up and it faltered when I didn't smile back. Carlisle's eyes looked at mine begging with forgiveness. From my many trips to the hospital, Carlisle was the type of person to blame everything on him even when it was logically not. It wasn't fully his fault, but he did take some part in it and it must be eating him alive. I bit my tongue from having a major outburst at all of them and very close to breakdown.

I swallowed the lump in my throat, but I didn't need to that much. The reaction on the faces of the rest of them was too hilarious not to let one little giggle slip. Embry and Quil wasn't that much better.

When I was younger, I never showed much sympathy towards anyone or anything soft-hearted in public. I was a bitter little smart-mouth to put it lightly and after an encounter with one or more of the Cullens, my patience and sanity were at an all time low.

I was even worst when I came home from school and the piled up mocking, teasing, and harassing me would leave me a cranky crying mess.

The public show of affection was far from my warmth back then. They looked shocked and tried to cover it as best as they could, but it was a lost cause. They already showed the sign of weakness.

I turned towards Sue blocking her view from the Cullens before she literally burned holes into their heads and indirectly saved them as well. Sue was never the type of person to not let her views be know, so she showed it depending on the situation. By the squirming and the nervous glances, she was doing what she does best: protecting what's hers.

"Sue, I'm going to take Sarah upstairs to put her down," Sue nodded not taking her eyes off them.

I passed Quil and Embry kissing them both in thanks and they let a smile creep up on their oh so serious faces. I was surprised Quil managed this long to be quiet. I walked tried to go up the stairs, but was pulled in to the many greetings, hellos, and old faces. Most people stopped to compliment me on something, telling me they're glad to have me back, or just wanted to see what I was up to. Surprisingly enough, I was having fun. Everyone caught me up with what was happening in the little territory that is La Push and the embarrassing stories that happened when I was there never stopped and sometimes I even laughed at the things I didn't remember.

Most of them saw the wonderful "conversation" that happened at the front door, but they never brought it up which I was very grateful for.

I didn't even see them pass me on the way to who knows where since if they saw one of them then they would move the conversation over to another place or slyly start to walk in the other direction. You gotta love family, right?

After an hour of mingling and catching up, my arms were getting tired of carrying Sarah up, down, and all around the house. The music and chatter in the living room deafened all other sounds from reaching anyone, so as the music got louder, the talking got louder as well. Finally finding a room, I opened the door without even knocking.

Bad idea.

With enough awkwardness to kill an elephant, I stood in the doorway wide eyed at the group in front of me. Alice was on the bed in Jasper's lap both looking at the doorway with startled expressions, Emmett was in the lounge chair with Rose on the arm of the chair smiling weakly at me and Rose didn't look in my direction, but I saw her tense up. Leah was sitting on the floor with her legs out with one bent. She glared at me immediately and held her head high. Jake was on the bed with his elbows on his knees taking glances at me, but never straight in the eyes. Tanya was on the floor with wringing her fingers nervously looking from Edward to me and back with her legs Indian-style.

I hesitated before looking at Edward. He was leaning against the wall next to Tanya not looking at me at all. Not a glance, not a stare, not a glare, no acknowledgement at all that I came. It was dead silent in the room. Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Leah were the only ones that we bluntly looking at me and to say it wasn't a little unnerving would a lie if I were telling the truth.

I cleared my throat a little and chuckled as confident as I felt.

"Um, sorry I'll find another room." I waved lightly, but Leah got up as quick I was about to close the door.

"Its fine we were just leaving anyways." She walked out of the room shoving me lightly on her way out. The rest looked at each other quickly before following Leah. I made a path as best I could with the little space provided. Each one filed out of the room ineptly and I kept my face down and played with Sarah's hair for a minute. I sighed in relief and stepped into the room and put Sarah down for a nap. I tucked her in and she fell asleep straight away.

"You're good with her." I screamed frightened by the person who nearly scared me half to death. I rolled my eyes as I held my hand to my heart to calm it down.

"Seth I swear if that's you I'm gonna," I stopped short as I turned to see Edward looking at Sarah. Did he ever move? Did he even get out of the room?

"I came back to get my jacket." He nodded to the jacket on the back of the chair like he could tell I was wondering why he was here. I turned back to Sarah and nodded in acknowledgement. He walked slowly over to the chair and stopped. I didn't hear footsteps leave the room, so he must have not left. There was no way I was leaving Sarah alone with Edward in the room. I wasn't going to take my chances.

"Something bothering you?" I said indifferently. Why was he still here? He got his jacket now he could leave. The door was right there.

Edward chuckled dryly and moved a little closer to me.

"No, I think we're about to leave. It's little awkward right now with everyone staring at us."

"Funny, I always thought you liked attention." He was silent for a minute or two before I turned my head to the side to see if he left or was just standing there like a statue.

"Edward if you don't mind, I would rather you be out of this room before I leave. You did say you were going to leave. Tanya must be worried sick. It's rude to keep someone waiting." A spark of confidence crept up in my voice. I turned around and stared him down. 'He's just a person,' I thought, 'there's nothing he could do that I can't do back.'

He looked at me questioningly. Edward took a step near me excepting me to at least flinch at a single movement. He came so close that I could hear him breathing.

"Watch yourself, Swan. We were kids back then and you weren't that hurt anyways. You overreacted by leaving. Do you know how much guilt you put on us? We're still working off the punishment. If anything, you owe us an apology." I scoffed and wanted to retorted, but the dam was already broken.

"We never did anything completely horrible to you! A few mocking statements, sure, but we were kids and blaming what happened on Tanya and the others wasn't fair. Do you even know what you caused? Alice got her credit cards taken away for three years, Rose can barely look her parents in the eye, Emmett was banned from sports, Jasper got sent to freaking military school. Leah is never on the rez anymore because of this. Tanya had to beg and pled her parents to let her stay in Forks!" Edward was breathing hard letting out all his anger.

"And now you come back and have the nerve to look us in the faces like nothing you did cause it? I knew you had problems Isabella, but next time, keep them to yourself."I couldn't believe him! Was he seriously blaming all his problems on me? I didn't even get a word in. He stomped out of the room and slammed the door on his way out.

I dragged in a staggered breath and took a look down to Sarah. She woke up sometime in between his rant and looked a little scared, but more concern was in her eyes.

I sat next to her on the bed and laid her down facing her. She looked like she was pondering something important and she didn't seem to like what she was thinking.

I didn't speak. I didn't explain to her that everything was fine and she had nothing to worry about. Eventually, she would fall asleep and then forget about it.

Unfortunately, I had no hope for myself.

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The party ended shortly after the Cullens left. It was getting close to one o'clock and everyone was partied out for the time being.

I was staying at Charlie's old house while he was getting moved into the house with Sue. I didn't want to overcrowd the house, but more importantly Leah still lived there. Surprising right? It wasn't like she was seen there a lot. She left early in the morning before everyone else woke up and came home late when everyone is asleep. Sue stopped trying to control her. Leah wasn't the type of person to be pushed into anything and was almost as stubborn as I was.

Even when we were younger, the relationship was strained. Sue was always over the house helping my dad take care of me. Charlie was a patience man, but he could never understand woman especially his daughter. That was a curse and a blessing in itself. Sue was kind of like the mother figure while I lived in Forks, and with her came a package deal: her kids.

Seth was a little shy at first, but once he got to know that not all girls have cooties, he was perfectly fine and the connection was natural. Leah was a little difficult with the process. I didn't know what I did to offend her, so for the first two years of knowing Sue, we were just people who were stuck with each other.

I remember our first conversation clear as day, but I'm not talking about the little hi you say to a person and then never speak to them for the rest of the time they are there. I'm talking about a longer than 1 minute conversation with a person that doesn't' involve only you talking.

"Hi, Leah."

" . . . Is my mom ready to go?"

"Um, no."

"Is Seth bothering you?"

"No! I, ah, just want to talk you."

" . . . About?"

"Nothing, anything, what's on your mind?"

" . . . Not much really."

"Oh . . . that's nice."

" . . . I'm going get something to drink."

"Ok."

And that was that. Leah made friends with Tanya at a park in Port Angeles and the rest is history. She automatically disliked me and I had more to deal with. No conversation gone badly, no friendship made that was destroyed, nothing. She hated me because Tanya hated me. If there was any more to the story, then it's one-sided because to this day I'm still trying to decipher Leah.

Seth pulled up to the house and made an announcement of it to the entire forest.

"Home sweet home, is it not Bells?" I punched him in the shoulder. Looking around to see if my neighborhoods were looking out their windows to see what lunatic was screaming at one o'clock in the morning.

"You might want to keep it down, Seth." I walked to the house with Seth in tow behind me. It wasn't hard to tell. The guy was well over my height, so his shadow dominated mine.

"And why is that my Jelly-Belly?" He poked my stomach making me squeal and glare at him when he laughed and skipped ahead of me to open the door.

"I wouldn't want the animals to be traumatized. Really Seth, haven't they been suffered enough from smelling you, you actually want them to see you?" I shook my head in mock sadness. Seth looked down at my frame and glared playfully at me trying to look stern.

"Bella, sweet Bella you are right," he posed with his foot on the wall leaning on it looking in the other direction, "it's a crime to be this beautiful is it not? They would never tear their eyes away from me. And well," he looked at me cockily, "I'm just too sexy for myself."

I laughed at him as he pouted. What did he expect me to do? Fall to the ground and look at him with adoration at the oh-so-true words he said to me? I tried to compose myself as best as I could and reduced to giggling.

Seth pouted at me and walked past me mumbling something along lines of meanie. I rolled my eyes. Baby. We took my luggage in and Seth left after we finished giving me a hug and kiss on the cheek.

"Bella," he whispered into my ear, "remember you always have a place in La Push and if . . . they ever bother you, promise me you'll tell one of us, mom, me, the pack, anyone. You're always safe there." I smiled softly at Seth and nodded against his shoulder. La Push, to me, was always safe; it was my home away from home: family and place alike.

"I know, Seth and I promise I'll tell someone about them if anything upsets me." A pang in my head reminded me that what I promised was the opposite of what I wanted to do. I didn't want them to worry about me like they did when I was younger. I have to admit by just keeping it bottled up and not talking to anyone just made me a bitter mess and fueled them even more. I would tell them about what happened, but I would refuse them to do something about it unless it was serious.

I waved to Seth as he drove out of the driveway then turned towards the house with a sigh. There were a little scatter of boxes with Charlie's things, but the left the furniture and the TV, so I wouldn't get bored. I looked in my bag for my IPod and found out at the very bottom of it.

I plugged it into my ears and danced to some R&B. I should probably look in the fridge to see what damage control I needed to do. I didn't feel as tired as I should have been as I checked all of the food in the fridge to see if it was edible. Most of it still was, but I had to throw some of the fish out. Charlie was an avid fisher and still is. He went the lake in La Push with Billy at any free time he got and he took me with him sometimes.

Billy was Charlie's best friends since they were in high school and went through everything with him. He was there when my mom was pregnant with me, when they got married, as I grew up, when my dad and mom divorced, and he practically helped raise me. Billy had two daughters and one son with his wife, Cynthia. His daughters were the older ones, one at college and the other married in another state. Cynthia died in a car accident shortly after his son's birth and he was heartbroken. We came and helped get back on his feet. That isn't even the worst part.

Jacob Black was his son.

I shook my head at the absurd thing of them being related. Billy was a kind old man and Jake just . . . wasn't.

Last time I heard of Billy he got into an accident painting the house and was paralyzed to a wheelchair. I wondered how he was doing now.

I decided to go to bed since I had to go to the store in the morning to get some food for the fridge and get whatever else I needed. Charlie faxed over my school supplies list while I was in Phoenix, so my mom and I have those already. While making a list for the grocery store, I realized something. Where was Charlie during all of this? He wasn't at the party and Sue didn't say anything about him.

I picked up the phone and dialed the police station and waited a few minutes before I got his deputy, Chris.

"Forks Police Station, how can we help you?" Always the formal one.

"Hey Chris, it is Bella. Is Charlie still there? He isn't at the house."

"Oh, Bella! How ya doing, kiddo? You just missed him. We just wrapped up a bust we've helped Port Angeles with, so he couldn't make it to the party."

"I'm fine, Chris and thanks for telling me. Do you know where he is now?" The police station wasn't far from where we lived, so it didn't make any sense.

"Um, he said he was going to make a pit stop before coming home." I sighed in relief. So he was intentionally making me worry. I rolled my eyes. He at least should have called.

"Do you know if he has his cell phone on him?"

"I think so," he chuckled lightly, "first time I didn't have remind him to do so." I smiled and chuckled with him. Charlie liked to keep his hands free at all time in case of an emergency. He got use to emergencies as I grew up.

I thanked him again and hung up to try and reach Charlie. Picking at my nails as I heard the dial tone ring, Charlie finally picked up after the second ring.

"Hello?" I screwed my eyebrows together. His voice sounded gruffer then it usually was like he was interviewing someone for a heinous crime. I leaned across the table in the kitchen. If he wasn't at the station, then why would he be interviewing someone?

"Hey, Dad, I'm at the house and I was wondering when you were coming home?"

"Oh, Bella! Sorry, I just had to take care of something before going home. I'll be there shortly." He couldn't be that far away from home.

"How close are you to the house? What are you doing anyways?" Even if it was some classified police stuff, he would give me something brief to know he wasn't doing something dangerous.

"Now, you don't go and worry about that. I'll be home soon, I promise." He hung up before I could question him even more. I had a bad feeling in the pit of stomach about my father's whereabouts.

Maybe I should stay up a little bit longer. Just to make sure he was getting in safe.