Title: It's Not Insomnia
Author: Thursday Angelus
Rating: T (just in case)
Summary: Quite a few of Hogwarts' students are suffering from lack of sleep. And according to them, it isn't their fault. But it's not insomnia, they swear. The only problem is, no one would believe them if they told what really kept them awake.
Pairings: There are hints at quite a few, but nothing is really prominent. So, interpret it how you will.
It's Not Insomnia
Ron Weasley
Ron Weasley had a hard time sleeping whilst at school. And it wasn't because he had insomnia. Oh no, that would be far too simple. No, he had to be friends with Harry Potter.
People often made fun of him because he'd go to bed ridiculously early every night, then wake up late still grumbling about how tired he was. But they didn't know what happened in between. Every night since fifth year, Harry would have these horrible nightmares. He'd start to whine about an hour after he dozed off, and the next thing Ron knew, his friend was flailing around on the bed, screaming his head off.
The screaming was the worst part.
No matter how much of a jerk he had been in the past, Ron really did care about Harry. And it scared him, hearing the boy scream like that. It was like he was undergoing torture. The sad thing was, Harry probably was being tortured. The poor kid had the biggest bleeding heart out of anyone Ron knew, and he'd most likely find watching someone else in pain just as torturous as if it was himself. Which, on several occasions, it probably had been.
There were real horrors in Harry's past, and there was nothing anyone could do about it. The thing is, Harry had always had nightmares, even back when they were first years. But they were small in comparison. After all, what is a flash of green light, really? When they were kids, it meant nothing.
But then they got older, and Harry had to learn the hard way.
The regular nightmares turned to nighttime torture sessions after the incident in the Graveyard fourth year. After Cedric died; When Voldemort returned. And after Harry almost died himself.
And as time passed, Harry was able to add more horrors to his list, more fears. So now, at the age of seventeen, Harry has enough memories and secret fears to keep him screaming every night.
And Harry, the tragic hero he was, wouldn't take a dreamless sleep potion. Back in the war, it made sense. He might have a vision, and that vision could save their lives. But now, he has no excuse. Harry says that the potion gives him horrible headaches, and everyone buys it because they don't know the truth. No one but Ron, that is, because he knows his best friend.
Harry wants to suffer. He thinks he deserves it.
Ron knows there's nothing he can do to change his mind. Harry can be stubborn like that. But that doesn't mean that he can't help.
So every night, Ron goes to bed extra early, with an alarm set to wake him up around twelve, because Harry has never gone past one in the morning without going into hysterics. He climbs into Harry's bed, shuts the curtains, and casts a silencing charm under his breath. He wouldn't want Harry to wake up the rest of Gryffindor like he did before Ron started these vigils.
And then he waits. Sometimes for ten minutes, sometimes for fifty, but wait he does. And then, out of nowhere, Harry starts to scream.
Ron knows that by the time Harry's screaming he's too far gone in whatever nightmare is haunting him that night and won't wake up. So he grabs his friend and just holds him close, offering what little comfort that he can. It doesn't really help much, but it's all he can do, so he'd be a rotten friend if he didn't.
And so they sit: long into the night, with Harry screaming and crying, clutching onto Ron in his sleep, fighting through his own personal hell.
Sometimes the screams are just senseless sounds. But sometimes, they're names. And those are the worst ones, because Ron knows them all. Names like Fred, Colin, Dumbledore, and even Snape. Mad-eye, Remus, and Tonks. Mum and Dad. Cedric. And Sirius. Sirius, Sirius, Sirius.
And then there are names that make him even more afraid, names that Harry's cursing at the top of his lungs. Yelling out Voldemort, and Wormtail. Cursing Bellatrix Lestrange too many times to count. He has a strong hate for Fenrir Greyback as well.
And Ron didn't blame him.
The worst by far were the name's practically whispered. The names he cherished more than others, but scarred him so. Names he didn't want to lose. Hermione and Ginny and the Weasley clan. Neville, and Seamus. Dean, as well. Even Luna Lovegood made a few appearances.
And of course, Ron's name was often featured.
Malfoy had popped up several times, but never the same way twice. Sometimes Harry would be practically growling the name, the hate so evident that Ron flinched. He'd scream it like a swear word as well, and then once, only once, Harry whispered "Draco." Not Malfoy, but Draco. And his voice was so quiet that Ron was unable to tell the emotion behind it, but if he had to guess, he would have said regret. As strange as it may seem, it sounded like Harry was apologizing to Malfoy, of all people. If someone had asked him, Ron would have said it should have been the other way around.
The worse nights by far though, were the nights when Harry just never showed up. Ron would go to bed, be woken up at midnight, then look over to Harry's bed to find it empty. And Merlin knows what Harry does those nights, when he can't even bear to sleep. So then Ron stays up all night, waiting, anxiously starring at their door, hoping for Harry to stumble in, deliriously tired, and collapse on his bed. But it never happens.
Then the sun comes up, everyone goes down for breakfast, and there will be Harry, sitting calmly at the Gryffindor table, rubbing his eyes and drenching his pancakes in maple syrup.
See, some people might be asking why he even bothers, if it doesn't really help. Ron asks himself that every day, and never finds the answer. All he knows is that he has to. One time, back in sixth year, Lavender kept him out a little later than usual, and to be honest, Harry was the farthest thing from his mind. That is, until he got back.
He walked into the dorm room to be greeted by a haunting scream, just like the ones he silenced every night. All of his dorm mates were standing around Harry's bed, pale faced and shaking, watching as their friend cried out in agony, unable to do anything but watch.
It looked as if Harry's screaming had woken them, and, unsure what else to do, the boys cast a silencing charm on the door to keep him from waking the rest of the castle. Dean had his eyes squeezed shut clutching for dear life to a silently sobbing Seamus, as Neville starred wide-eyed at Harry, frozen in horror.
Without saying a word, Ron crossed the room, climbed on to the bed, shut the curtains, casting a silencing charm, and pulled Harry to him.
From then on, none of the sixth year boys teased Ron for his morning grumbling. Now they knew.
So every night, Ron holds onto Harry as he fights his way through his self-made hell. And every night, an hour or so before dawn, the screams are replaced by tears. Ron is helpless to do anything but watch as Harry cries for his pain, and the pain of others. He is crying for the dead and their families; for the nameless victims never to be found.
Ron holds his friend as he cries for all of wizard-kind, letting loose the agony that haunts him every day, and most likely will for the rest of his life. He holds onto Harry, trying to offer what little comfort he can.
As he cries with him.
A/N: Yes, I realize how depressing that was, but please don't hurt me. And I promise to make the next one extra happy/funny if all you lovely people review. That is, unless you want another depressing one, then all you have to do is ask...
And I know that I have my other two stories to work on, but I've really hit road-blocks on them both. So if any of you are reading The World He Never Knew or What Dean DOes Best, and you have any suggestions, or things you want to see happen in those stories, just let me know in either a PM or a review on those stories. Thanks so much, my dears.
Until next time.