I don't own Harry Potter. I think I've said that a lot of times before…

"I'll get paid double?" Andromeda asked incredulously.

"Yes but I won't be the one here with you. I think Agatha is the one in charge that night. You'll probably be dealing with minor problems on your own."

"But I'll get paid double," Andromeda stressed again. Merlin could she use the money. They were going to have to move to another flat with the New Year and Nymphadora seemed to be growing out of everything. Andromeda's own robes were worn and Ted, working in the dirt with plants, went through clothes faster that students went through paper.

"Yes," Victoria agreed. "Are you sure you're up to it?" Andromeda nodded. She didn't need to ask Ted on this one. They had both been trying to figure out a way to pick up extra hours without leaving Nymphadora alone. Ted wasn't scheduled to work on Christmas Eve; they would be alright in that regard. "Fine. I'll tell Agatha you'll be working with her that night. But don't say I didn't warn you," her trainer told her. Andromeda nodded again and Victoria shook her head before heading off down the corridor.

Two days later and Andromeda was about to fall as she trampled up the slimy slush covered stairs towards their flat. She had worked an eight hour shift at St. Mungo's and she wanted to completely collapse. She hadn't known so many things could go wrong when families got together; she of all people should have known that families could be dangerous. She sighed and shoved open the door to the sound of Christmas music on the wireless and Nymphadora happily babbling away to Ted as he sat on the ground playing with her.

"Mama!" she yelped happily, toddling towards Andromeda as best she could. Ted got up from the floor and scooped Nymphadora up in his arms as Andromeda shut the door behind her.

"How was- oomph," Ted asked before she collapsed against him, her forehead on his shoulder.

"Mama," Nymphadora added sympathetically, patting Andromeda's head clumsily. Andromeda groaned and looked up again.

"Do you know how many places I've removed a peppermint stick from tonight?" she asked Ted. Nymphadora reached out her arms for Andromeda.

"Mama," she contributed again.

"It's official. There is a question I don't want the answer to," Ted replied, wrinkling his nose as Andromeda took Nymphadora from him, settling the fifteen-month-old on her hip.

"There was one man who came in with at least one peppermint stick poking out of every available place, including his navel. He looked like some sort of deranged peppermint porcupine," Andromeda informed him as he disappeared into the kitchen.

"That sounds pleasant," Ted called dryly from the kitchen. She could hear him banging around and she followed him.

"He wasn't the worst of the bunch," Andromeda told him. "There was one witch, so desperate to make the wizard she fancied like her, that she tried to enchant her hair into mistletoe."

"Not the strangest thing I've heard," Ted told her as he set the kettle on the stove.

"That's not the bad part. She accidently turned her entire self into mistletoe. She was completely green except for the berries that were springing out everywhere."

"So just as bad as the peppermint stick," Ted replied, flicking the kettle with his wand. Andromeda shook her head.

"The man with peppermint sticks wanted to be treated as soon as possible. She refused to be treated until the man she fancied gave her a kiss." Andromeda rolled her eyes. "Who comes up with these things anyway? Why does mistletoe even mean people have to kiss at the holidays?" Ted opened his mouth and Andromeda recognized the gleam in his eye that signified a long explanation. "Never mind," she said quickly. "Rhetorical."

"But it's-"

"Ted!" she argued.

"Dromeda!" he mocked. Nymphadora looked between them with wide eyes as if she had come to the realization her parents were both crazy. Then she stuck three fingers on her right hand in her mouth. The kettle on the stove began to whistle. "I'm guessing you don't want peppermint," Ted teased her.

"That would be correct," she answered primly before taking Nymphadora and turning her upside-down, hanging on to the little girl's torso. Her daughter giggled as Andromeda lifted her back up again. "After mistletoe witch, we got a wizard who had gotten into a fight with his brother over dinner and came in with antlers, hooves, fur, and a glowing nose." Ted snorted and began whistling something very chipper as he pulled a pair of mugs down from one of the cupboards.

"I bet you five sickles he was a muggle-born."

"Five sickles for me then. His sister-in-law was though."

"Damn-it," he replied. "I haven't got five sickles on me."

"Language Ted. Nymphadora's already picked up enough from you."

"She hasn't said anything truly bad yet," he countered, putting a tea bag into each of the mugs.

Andromeda sighed. "Why would you assume she was a muggle-born anyway?"

"Well you certainly didn't get the Rudolph reference, did you?" Ted asked picking up the mugs and heading toward the sofa again.

"Rudolph who?" she questioned, following him out of the kitchen.

"The Red-Nosed Reindeer," he told her.

"Come again?" Andromeda asked him. He shook his head.

"It's a Christmas carol."

"What do reindeer, even a red nosed one have to do with Christmas?"

"How else would Father Christmas get around?"

"He uses the Floo," Andromeda told him, sitting down.

"No, he uses his flying reindeer to make his sleigh go up in the air so he can deliver toys to all the children," Ted rebutted, sitting down next to her, leaning back lazily. Nymphadora squirmed in Andromeda's arms and she set the little girl down on the floor.

"Flying rein- Ted, you're mental," Andromeda informed him. "He uses the Floo Network and he has a bag with an undetectable extension charm on it."

"No, it's a sleigh."

"Floo," Andromeda argued.

"What's magic about the Floo Network?" Ted asked her.

"Are you joking?"

"I mean it's technically magic but it's not, you know, magical, surreal, imaginative," he said, searching for the right word.

"I'm sure Ignatia Wildsmith thought it was quite imaginative and magical," Andromeda countered.

"Ignatia Wildsmith was a crazy pyromaniac who burned down seven houses in his lifetime. It's by chance that he eventually invented something useful," Ted countered.

"We had one of those too!"

"Crazy pyromaniacs?" Ted asked her

"Yes," she agreed, scooting closer to his side.

"I should have bet on it and won my sickles back," Ted replied, lazily putting one of his arms around her.

"It was a little boy though, about seven. His parents let his older brother light the candles on the Christmas tree-"

"How old was his brother?"

"Second or third year but the Ministry doesn't care about little traditional things like that, especially when there's close parental supervision. At any rate, his little brother got jealous and then lit himself on fire."

"Oh God," Ted said, looking frightened.

"He wasn't hurt. Somehow whatever spell he managed to pull off protected himself from the flames. He just was basically a fireball. He apparently burnt down half their living room before they shooed him outside in the garden while they figured out what to do. Thankfully they don't live near any muggles."

"I'd reckon he was terrified though."

"No, absolutely thrilled," Andromeda replied. "He kept running around declaring he was the 'Human Torch'. His parents had to drag him in to be treated because he liked being able to set everything on fire. Dragged being metaphorical of course. His father was floating him in the air."

"How'd you get him to turn off?"

"We couldn't. We ended up giving him a mild sleeping potion. Once he was asleep, the spell died. He fell asleep stark naked in the middle of the floor. He'd burnt all his clothes off."

"You're not allowed to do that," Ted told Nymphadora who had come toddling back towards the sofa having dumped over the basket with her toys and then put half of them back in very methodically. Ted moved his arm from around Andromeda and picked up Nymphadora, settling her in his lap before putting his arm back around Andromeda's shoulders.

"Da," she commented snuggling into him. Andromeda shook her head at her currently white-haired daughter. Nymphadora looked back at her and then yawned.

"No turning into fire for you," Andromeda agreed.

"No," Nymphadora repeated and Andromeda held out her arms.

"Come here," she said. "Cuddle with me a little." Nymphadora crawled over Ted's legs into Andromeda's lap where Andromeda folded her baby up in her arms. Her daughter cuddled right back.

"So peppermint sticks, mistletoe, Rudolph, and fire?" Ted asked her.

"Mmm," Andromeda agreed. "That and a handful of wizards failing to create Father Christmas beards. One wizard accidently vanished his chin and another couldn't get the hair to stop growing. It filled the room before we got it to quit. And the usual family fight sort of things. Hexes that won't quit, turnips up people's noses, clothes that won't come off, you know the sort."

"Oh sure," Ted agreed. He stretched out his feet and knocked over his cup of tea with his foot.

"Ted!" Andromeda told him.

"Damn!" Nymphadora cried out.

"Ted!" Andromeda repeated.

"Dora, you had to grab that word?" Ted groaned as he bent down to deal with the mess

"Damn!" she repeated happily.

"No, Nymphadora, that's a bad word," Andromeda scolded turning her around.

"Damn," Nymphadora repeated with the same grin she'd had whenever she figured out a new word. "Damn-damn." Andromeda glared at Ted.

"See, imperfect ending to an imperfect day," he replied and then kissed her cheek before moving off to the kitchen so she had no chance to retaliate.

"Damn," Nymphadora voiced.

Andromeda shook her head. "Your Dad's in more trouble than peppermint stick man, did you know?" Andromeda asked her daughter as she stood up settling Nymphadora on her hip.

"Da t'ouble," Nymphadora answered seriously.

"Big trouble," Andromeda informed her. "Now what Holiday Hex shall I choose for your father?"

"I'm good with mistletoe!"

"Oh shut-up Ted!"

Alright, I might be on a little bit of a Tonks family kick. I kind of like them. But I promise they'll be other people too.

Criticisms? Idea suggestions? Likes? Leave me a review! :)